Breathless (2 page)

“You okay?” Rachel whispered.

Lainey nodded, secretly hating that her little sister had to look out for her. It should be the other way around.

Her mother brought the cake over with a big smile on her face. It was covered in chocolate frosting, and Rachel had decorated it with beautiful calligraphy letters saying Happy Birthday. Her little sister was passionate about baking and decorating.

“Happy Birthday!” her mom said.

She listened as her family sang loudly and off-key, but it warmed her heart a little. She didn’t bother to make a wish as she blew out the candles. They never came true.

Peter cut the cake and dished it out.

“Thanks for the cake, Rachel.” Lainey took a bite and savored the sweet flavor.

They finished eating in silence before Lainey opened her presents. One was a book from her mom and Peter she really wanted; the other was a pink sundress from Rachel she’d seen in a shop downtown.

“Thanks, guys. I really appreciate this. I needed a little something to make today special.”

A smile crossed Peter’s face. “We have another gift for you, but it won’t be ready until supper. It’s taking a little longer than we expected.”

“Oh, what is it?”

“Nope, I can’t tell you. It would spoil the surprise!” Mom smacked Lainey’s shoulder with a hand towel.

Lainey rolled her eyes before taking her plate to the sink. Rachel was close behind her.

“Wanna go swimming this afternoon? I wanna wear my new swimsuit.” Rachel bounced up and down on her toes. “Pretty please?”

“I don’t know. I have so many things to do.” Lainey laughed. “I have to plan my 401K and pick out my retirement home.”

Rachel sighed dramatically. “You waitress at Murray’s Café a few days a week, I doubt you need a 401K, and you aren’t old.”

Depression pressed in on Lainey. She hadn’t worked there in two weeks. Murray had given her a break, telling her to get her shit together since she’d been snappy with her customers and they had expressed concern. Considering Becca had worked as a waitress with her, it wasn’t easy. The last shift they’d worked together, Becca had dropped a whole plate of dishes and instead of being upset she curtsied. She never let the negative moments get to her. Without her, Lainey hated everything about the job and didn’t want to go back.

“I guess we can go swimming.” Lainey interrupted her own thoughts.

“I’m vetoing the ocean.” Rachel’s comment was sharp. “I want to go to the pool and use the slide. Kate is gonna be there too.”

*~*~*

For living so close to the ocean, an absurd amount of kids still went to the local swimming pool. Lainey and Rachel biked the ten blocks to the pool and locked their bikes up. The fee was only two dollars, and Lainey paid for both of them. She’d brought along her book, not really wanting to swim with the other girls and socialize. She hadn’t spoken to many of her old school friends since Becca disappeared. Of course, her old group had to be at the pool today.

Rachel spotted her best friend, Kate, and rushed towards her. Lainey stripped off her new pink sundress and plopped down on a chair beneath an umbrella in her blue polka dot two-piece. She stuck her nose into the book and ignored everyone.

“Hey, Lain.”

Lainey immediately recognized the rough voice as Oliver’s. She rested her book in her lap and stared at the blond, muscular boy in front of her. She forgot he swam on the school swimming team. Or he had. “Hi, Ollie,” Lainey mumbled.

“I haven’t seen you since graduation.” Ollie plopped down on the end of her beach chair. “We haven’t really talked since then. You’ve been… distant.”

“Yeah, I know,” she interrupted. Everyone knew. She glanced up at him. “How have you been?”

“Good. I’m getting a bit anxious to move to Georgia. I’m going to Georgia State University to be on the swim team. What about you?”

“Congratulations about getting into Georgia State,” Lainey said, completely ignoring his question.

“Thanks.” He glanced at the water before speaking. “The yearbook came out.”

Lainey studied her fingernails, holding her book steady. “Oh.”

Ollie nodded, picking at the hem of his swim trunks. “Yeah, I got mine yesterday. They… they dedicated a whole page to Becca. There are some good pictures of you and her.”

Lainey’s skin boiled; they didn’t have her permission to do that. She snapped her book closed. “I don’t care about a dedication in the yearbook.” She stood up and pulled on her sundress. “You’re a dick.”

“Lain, I’m sorry.” Oliver put up his hands in surrender. “I thought you’d like that.”

“I don’t. Now I remember why I don’t go to the pool.”

Rachel ran over to her, having spotted the scene. Lainey blushed. “I’m sorry, Rachel. I’m gonna get a snack and Oliver is gonna leave me alone. You can keep swimming.”

Lainey threw down her book and stalked over to the snack bar with her wallet, not caring about the stares behind her. The girl behind the counter wore a ridiculous paper hat; she was sweating in the heat of the small shack.

“What can I get you?” She smacked her gum as she spoke.

Gross
, Lainey thought. “I’d like a licorice rope.”

“It’ll be $1.75.”

Lainey handed over the money and took the snack before finding an empty table and plopping down on a concrete bench.
These things suck
. She kept her eyes down as she ate. Her temper ran too hot and she didn’t want to be around anyone. With the candy gone, she went back to her chair. She gave a half laugh when she saw the two chairs beside hers were empty. Oh well. Lainey pulled off her sundress. Swimming sounded nice to beat the heat. Diving into the 100 meter pool at the deep end, she picked an empty lane before swimming back and forth beneath the surface, holding her breath.

One.

Oliver had no right to talk to her. He’d only tried once after Becca disappeared, making up a fake apology and pretending to be sympathetic. He was seriously a dick.

Two.

Lainey was upset she’d made Rachel coming running. She didn’t want to embarrass her little sister. For some odd reason, Rachel worshiped the ground Lainey walked on.

Three.

She broke the surface of the water, not wanting to freak out the lifeguard and have the guy come jumping in to save her. She definitely didn’t need that. She continued doing laps until Rachel came over wearing her towel with water dripping from her nose. Lainey glanced at her watch and saw it was almost supper time. The whole situation with Oliver had left her exhausted and emotional. She plastered a smile on her face and gathered their things. Grey clouds started to cover the blue sky as they rode home.

“I’m sorry about earlier.” Lainey parked her bike by the porch.

Rachel shrugged. “It’s okay. Oliver should have left you alone. He’s been nagging me to talk to you for a few weeks every time I run into him.”

“Seriously? Next time tell him to –”

“I get the picture,” Rachel interrupted with a smile. “Did he ruin your birthday?”

Lainey put an arm around her sister as they walked up the stairs. “Nope. You see, this amazing girl made me a chocolate cake. My day is made.”

Rachel laughed, and Lainey couldn’t help but join her. She wished Becca could have seen her call Oliver a dick.

*~*~*

Her mom and Peter were just finishing supper after the girls showered and dressed. It was Lainey’s favorite; spaghetti and meatballs with garlic bread, dripping in butter and salt.

“How was the pool?” Peter asked.

Lainey let Rachel talk about the afternoon, grateful when she omitted her disagreement with Oliver. Rachel was excellent at deflecting.

“Did you swim?” Her mom wasn’t easily deterred.

“Yeah, I did some laps, and started my new book. It’s pretty good.” The lie slipped smoothly from Lainey’s lips.

The rest of dinner involved her mom telling embarrassing stories about Lainey, and lots of laughter. She even forgot about her best friend for a bit. Peter and Rachel washed up the dishes as Lainey flipped through cartoons on the television.

“Are you ready for your birthday present?” Her stepfather held a pink glittery cloth in his hands.

“Yes, I’m definitely ready!”

“Good, but I have to blindfold you.”

Lainey’s shoulders fell. “You’re kidding, right?”

“Nope.”

“Don’t be a spoil sport,” Rachel gently ribbed her.

“Fine, blindfold me, but if I fall and break something I’m suing.”

Lainey sat still as Peter tied the cloth around her head. “It itches.”

“Just be quiet.” Mom’s voice was gentle.

Lainey let her mom take her other arm as her parents guided her out of the house, keeping up the snarky comments as they walked. All she knew was that she was walking in sand and could hear the ocean louder. The ground beneath her flip-flops changed, and Lainey furrowed her brow. Rachel let out a squeal of excitement and her mom gave Lainey’s hand a reassuring squeeze.

“Can I look now?” Lainey bounced anxiously.

“Just one more second,” Peter said, letting go of her arm.

She waited another moment before the blindfold fell away. Her jaw dropped. She was a beauty, floating on the ocean with her sail spread and her body kissing the surface of the water. A blue scarf was wrapped around the mast, blowing in the breeze. A sailboat. They got her a boat!

Lainey screamed. “Is it really mine?” she asked as she jumped up and down.

Peter laughed. “Yes. Your mom and I know you’ve wanted one for a while. You’ll have to pay for some of her. We paid a good down payment on it, but she’s yours now. Old Ferny wanted to part with it since he hasn’t sailed since his wife got sick. It’s in great condition.”

“Can we go tonight?”

Lainey’s mom frowned. “I don’t know. It looks like a storm is blowing in.”

“Please. We won’t be long,” Lainey begged. “Peter can sail it and Rachel can help too.”

“Please, Mom!” Rachel added her two cents. “It’s her birthday.”

Her mom pressed her lips together, but it slowly became a grin. “I guess you can go. Don’t stay out late, and come in if the water changes any more. Storms blow in too fast here.”

“We promise, dear.” Peter kissed his wife’s cheek. “Let’s let Lainey take her first voyage.”

“Thank you!” Lainey hugged her mother before climbing into the boat.

She rushed towards the front, in love with it already. This was
her
boat. She could sail and not have to spend all day lying on the beach. She couldn’t believe it! Peter climbed on and put his arms out to help Rachel. When Rachel was aboard, he opened a small chest and pulled out a life vest. Lainey shook her head, helping Rachel put it on.

“I’m a better swimmer than you.” Lainey clicked the buckle.

“Your mom wouldn’t like it if she saw only one of you wearing a life vest.” Peter hesitated. “Maybe we should wait until tomorrow.”

“No, please! Just this once! Peter, please.” Lainey hated to ask him for anything, but she had to have this.

“Fine, but don’t tell your mom.”

“We won’t,” the two girls chimed in unison.

She was a beauty and sailed like a dream. Lainey stood at the bow, staring down as the waves crashed into the side of the boat. She closed her eyes and listened to the water. All of the adventures she could take with her own boat. Becca would have loved it. They could have explored the ocean together… and Lainey wouldn’t have to be alone.

After about thirty minutes, Peter became anxious. The storm was rolling in quicker than he expected. The wind picked up and the sky had gotten dark. He yelled over the noise for Rachel and Lainey to secure themselves and to stay away from the edges. Lainey didn’t move as she watched two birds touch the surface of the water. Peter moved quickly, adjusting the ropes and shouting for Rachel to turn the boat around. It seemed like everything was moving in slow motion. Lightning lit up the sky, casting an eerie glow across the water.

“Lainey, move!” Peter shouted, getting her attention.

It felt like a dream. Lainey scrambled to her feet as a wave crashed upon the boat and wrapped around her ankles. She tried to keep her balance, but the water pulled her. A scream escaped her lips as she was yanked into the ocean.

Rachel’s screams followed her, but could do nothing to save her.

Lainey struggled to keep her face above the surface of the water. Even a practiced swimmer like her couldn’t stop the force of the storm from pulling her under every few seconds. She gasped as her face popped above the water long enough to shout at her stepfather.

“Peter!”

His voice was muffled, and she couldn’t see him. The thunder was too loud. Water poured into her mouth and she coughed, but more came in. The waves swept her beneath the surface again. She fought against the rolling swell, but it kept pulling her under.

“Help!” Lainey screamed, pulling herself up for a moment.

The current caught her and dragged her beneath the water. She kicked her legs and her lungs burned as she attempted to get back to the surface. It wasn’t working. The current pulled her deeper. She didn’t know up from down after being tossed around. She felt oddly calm, but outwardly began to panic. No amount of holding her breath could have prepared her for drowning. She didn’t think it would end like this. Lainey regretted not telling her mom she loved her, and not accepting Peter as a father figure. She wished she had spent more time with Rachel and been a better big sister. It didn’t matter now. She couldn’t help but wonder if Becca felt the same way before she drowned. She tried again to break the surface, but in her heart, Lainey knew it was over.