Read Breene, K F - Growing Pains 01 Online
Authors: Lost (and) Found (v5.0)
“Somewhere to be?” Sean asked,
glancing over.
“Nope. Apparently I’m not very
popular. You?”
“Here, getting to know my team.”
“Hmmm. Speaking of team--I thought
you said Monica was your secret weapon?”
Sean softly sighed.
“You’re so going to get a
Thump-Bird,” Krista said as she lifted her glass.
Sean snickered, “At least then I’d
see what it was.”
“True. About Monica Devine…”
“For a secret weapon to be
effective, it must be kept secret.”
“Which, Dr. Watson, rules her out.”
Sean nodded once, still looking
into his beer. “Just so.”
“Then why did you call her a secret
weapon?”
He half-turned to her, “Because she
needs that distinction to function at her best. She needs to be singled out and
put above everyone else. And I care to make that effort, before you ask,
because she is excellent at her job, and when I need her, I don’t want to have
to go through her manager to get her. I want her willingness, which means
sucking up.”
Krista really, really wanted to ask
about his personal history with her. What else did sucking up mean in his book?
Where did the game lead that he was playing with her? But now she couldn’t ask
because of their new deal. He was being so down-to-earth, so raw; she didn’t
want to upset their newly formed comfort level.
Krista swallowed down the question,
along with more Guinness.
“Okay then, this moves us to Mr.
Ray Man. Is he your real secret weapon?” she asked.
“Ray Man. Ha! Good one. No. I
wouldn’t call him a secret weapon, no.” Sean was still halfway turned to her,
and now he turned his head fully to make up that last bit. He looked into her
eyes, reading her again, searching for something. After another beat he said,
“You entrusted me with a secret. I will now entrust you with one. You tell
mine, or let your lips get loose, well then ...” He let the end of the comment
float off into the air.
“Sounds fair,” she shrugged,
intrigued.
He smiled with warmth, his eyes
infused with a softness Krista hadn’t seen before. “Ray Man, as you call him,
is my crutch. You have your mug, I have Ray.”
“Wait…” Krista looked at Sean hard.
Analyzed. Referred back to what she’d already known about him. Looked again.
“You’re--are you g*y?”
Sean laughed, “Ah, no. I do believe
I have a reputation, earned, to the contrary…”
Yikes. That was definitely a
straight man response. It was a womanizer response, actually—you didn’t get
straighter than that. And not in a good way.
“Okay then, not following.”
“He was my mentor at the first
company I worked for. Acting pays worse than hair and makeup for most of us.”
“You were an actor?” she giggled.
“Funny, is it? Hmm.” Sean turned
back to his beer. Krista realized with one part horror and two parts gratitude
that they had two more in front of them. This was the point that she either
went crazy, or stopped.
She should definitely stop.
“Sorry. No, not funny.” She said,
giggling some more. “Absolutely the least funny thing I have ever heard. Damn
droll, really.”
“Hmmm.”
“Okay, okay. So you were an actor.
Did you go to college?”
“I did. Majored in business.
Minored in acting. Went on to an MBA while still acting on the side.”
Krista started laughing again. She
couldn’t help it. “Didn’t the other actors think you were selling out or
something? Those two don’t really go hand in hand, you know?”
“They thought I would never make it
because I had a fall back.”
“And they were right?”
“They were. They are also all
working crappy, dead-end jobs in the poor house. I intend to have the last
laugh on this one.”
“Oh ho ho. Well. Remind me not to
give you a reason to hold a grudge.”
His kissable lips curved upwards as
he reached for his Guinness.
“Okay, fine, you moved on from
acting. When did you meet Ray?”
“I never said I moved on, but I met
Ray at the first company I worked for out of college. The job was just to pay the
bills while trying to make way as an actor.”
“Uh huh--wait. You still act?”
“Do you still do hair and makeup?”
“Yeah. Mine. No one pays me for
it.”
“You don’t do it for your friends?”
“Okay. Yes, I do. But still, they
don’t pay me for it.”
“Well, I don’t get paid for the
little I do, either.” He made a funny gesture with his head that was apparently
aimed at mimicking her.
“So...you act for your friends?”
She giggled again.
“You seem to giggle a lot for a
sarcastic bitch, you know?”
“We’ll get back to that. We are
still on you. No pun intended.”
“Mind in the gutter,
Marshall
!
And you were worried about me?” He huffed then sighed. “I act for various small
house productions that hold public auditions and generally don’t pay, all
right? If they do pay, I only accept the bare minimum the union mandates, and
then I donate the money back to the theater house or school--whichever it is.”
“Huh. Interesting.”
“That is not the secret I was
entrusting you with.”
“Yes, but it’s probably a better
one then the other one. This is outstanding gossip. Nobody knows this little
nugget, I bet.”
“And will they?” The way he said it
gave her pause. It was like he was grudgingly putting a small slice of his
vulnerability in her hands.
“Well, here’s the thing.” She was
willing to bargain. “I am eventually going to make a huge ass of myself. Maybe
tonight. Maybe a month from now. Maybe in a year. No, it won’t take an entire
year ... Anyway, I will undoubtedly make a huge ass of myself. I will keep your
gossip to myself if you keep my gossip to yourself. You tell everyone what a
dumb-ass I am, well then ...” She let the sentence hang like he did.
“How will I know what’s gossip, and
what is your usual behavior?”
“Yeah, good point. I’ll tell you. A
nugget for a nugget.”
“Deal.”
They lapsed into silence as Krista
waited for him to continue. He didn’t.
“Oh no. I still haven’t gotten the
first nugget. Ray Man. First job. Spill,Señor.”
“I was hoping you weren’t following
the conversation anymore.”
“I can function rather well in
drunk time, thank you very much. I am not so long out of college, after all.”
“True. Okay, well, Ray was my
mentor, as I said. I got the job to make some money while I looked for acting
gigs. Ray taught me how to sell; what to say, how to make a buck.”
“‘N’ all that jazz.”
“Yes, all that jazz. He is a great
salesman. He taught me to be a great salesman. After I got tired of being
rejected and poor in the acting community, I decided to pay more attention to
Ray. I learn fast.”
“And well, I imagine.” Her brain
strayed to Pink Shoes discussing rumors of Sean in bed. She could imagine those
strong shoulders over her; his long, hard body pressing her down into the soft
mattress.
“You all right?”
Krista jumped, and then punched him
in reflex. Then froze.
Sean smiled and grabbed his arm at
the same time. “Ouch—what was that for?”
Sean watched as Krista’s face
drained of color. She looked up at him with giant eyes, seemingly waiting for a
reaction. Not sure what was happening, just that impulse said she needed soothing,
he reached out to put a comforting hand on her shoulder.
Then it happened.
She flinched mightily, shrinking
back until she had sunk in on herself, curling herself into as much of a ball
as she could while still staying on the bar stool.
“I’m sorry—are you okay?” Sean
asked quickly, not sure what to do.
“Excuse me, I—I have to use the
restroom.” And she was gone, hurrying away with tears in her eyes.
Sean stared after her. Someone had
done a number on that girl. He’d never seen a woman her age look so scared.
What the hell had happened in her past to make such a strong woman tear up at a
playful punch? Was it parents, or a boyfriend? Whatever it was, it was serious.
Sean wished he knew her friends. He
wanted to know more about this. He wanted to help if he could. She was worth
it. Even if he never got that date, she was a good person. She didn’t deserve
this baggage, whatever it was.
He wanted the address of this guy.
He also realized that he needed to stay the hell away from her. She didn’t need
whatever baggage she had, and she certainly didn’t need any of his. And Sean
had plenty of his own.
When Krista got back she was under
control, but apologetic. Her eyes stayed downcast as she climbed back onto her
stool. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have hit you.”
Sean shrugged, slightly
uncomfortable. He wanted to joke with her about it. A five-foot-nothing woman
of her size hitting him—yeah, she couldn’t hurt him with a baseball bat. But he
didn’t think she’d understand joking about it. He played it safe.
“I forgive you.”
~*~*~*~
Krista took a big, steadying
breath. The last time she had hit a man playfully it had been Jim. They’d been
at his house with no one else home. He’d hit her back. It was on the arm, but
she couldn’t wear a short-sleeved shirt for two weeks. The bruise looked like
it had been painted on.
Krista nodded. “Sorry. Anyway, um…”
“I was saying that I learn well.
From Ray Man.”
The name had her solemn expression
softening. She took another large, cleansing breath. “Right.”
“I started helping him make sales.
Then I started making them on my own. Then… I surpassed the teacher.”
Sean had an incredibly soft
expression on his face, but he wasn’t pushing her. He wasn’t asking for her
secrets.
“He wasn’t pissed about that?” She
asked thankfully.
“You’ll see with Ray. His ambition
only goes so far. He sells to make a living for his family. He works to live,
and lives for his family. I don’t have a family, so I work to live, and live to
achieve.”
“Material boy.”
Sean’s smile was out of the blue.
“I still have my passion, it just doesn’t pay the bills.”
“So then, you got a job with our
company?”
“Oh, no. No, I worked for two
others after the one with Ray. The job directly after I did pretty well. I made
Senior Sales Associate all on my own. But the guys I was working with were real
salesmen, what everyone thinks of as real salesmen, anyway. They lived for it.
They were manifestations of it. They weren’t my kind of guys.”
“Testosterone freaks.”
Sean looked at her in surprise,
then leaned back and started laughing. A few other people looked over with
smiles.
“Yes. Exactly!”
“But you are plenty testosterone-y.
Man’s man and all that.”
“I can be when I need to be, yes. I
mean, I’m not effeminate or anything. Opposite of that. I like being a man and
all that, but...a different sort, I guess you’d say? Not sure how to explain.”
Was he flustered? Krista grinned,
back onto the path of comfortable. She’d have nightmares, though. Whenever she
had a flashback like that, she had nightmares. But Sean was making the moment
easy. He wasn’t asking questions to fill his curiosity, and he wasn’t
smothering her. He was cautious, she could read that, but he was floating
beside her, keeping her relaxed. It helped so much she wanted to break down all
over again.
He noticed her grin and said
quietly, “Shut up.”
She laughed then. She couldn’t help
it. Straight men hated saying anything that even remotely made them sound g*y.
Bunch of dummies.
“I got it. Go on.”
“O-kay. Well, I moved on again--a
different company with a higher pay bracket. I realized at this time that not
only did I like making money, and want to climb higher--because, after all,
what else am I working for besides money, right?”
“Correct, sir. Money makes the
world turn, n’ all that.”
“Uh, yes. Well, there was an
opening so I let Ray know about it. Ray applied for it because it was more
money than he was making without a lot more responsibility, or hours. He got it
with some help from me. We worked on a couple projects together and I realized
we made a dynamic team. Plus, it was good to work with someone who was more my
speed.”
“You always share a higher level of
trust with someone who pops your cherry.”
Sean choked into his beer. “What?”
“Your sales cherry. Your mentor.
You trust him—I get it.”
“Good Christ, Krista—and you were worried
about me being too sexual?”
“No, I was worried about you being
sexually cajoling. Nothing about sex in general. I’m not a prude.”
Sean’s pupils dilated as they held
hers. “Right,” Sean said quickly, looking away. “Anyway, we learned to be the
best sales team in the company. I moved up the ladder, he moved up with me. I
moved to this company, made my way and gained my stripes, and just recently
brought him with me.”
“So ... you are the young,
hot-headed hell raiser. The guy who gets his man regardless of the obstacles.
Ray is the level-headed father figure who keeps you in line, but in the end
helps you get your guy?”
“This isn’t a police show,
Marshall
,”
Sean laughed in his rich baritone. “But kind of, yes. The people I can’t reach,
he usually can.”
“Good cop, bad cop. Okay, I get
that. Why is that a secret?”
“It is a secret because I am not
nearly as good without him. He is my crutch, plain and simple.”
“I don’t think that’s true at all,
but I do think he is the one who makes the work less dismal.”
“You are perceptive.”
“As Helen Keller, yeah. I have my
moments.”
Krista’s phone beeped with a text
message. Being a solid member of the technology social network, she dove into
her bag to see who it was. As soon as she saw the name she threw her phone back
with a hair too much force.
“Not looking forward to that text?”
Sean asked casually.
She rolled her eyes. “Okay,
remember when I was ranting about that speed dating thing?”
“The whole company remembers it,
but go on.”
“What do you mean?”
“You scared Cindy out of the room.
Did you not think she would tell everyone?”
Krista got a distant look in her
eyes as she remembered back. “Oh yeah. Well, to hell with her. She’s a bitch.
She single-handedly made Joanna qui—um…“
Joanna had been the girl Sean took
home from the Christmas party. At least, that had been the rumor.
“I know what she did to Joanna. I
also know you didn’t join in on that.”
“Uh…”
“I didn’t sleep with her. It isn’t
gentlemanly of me to say it, but we both tried to set the record straight, so I
don’t think she would mind. You were never in the gossip circles, so you never
got to hear.”
“Uh…” Krista had no right to that
information. She couldn’t even verify it, because Joanna got the hell outta
Dodge when everyone came down on her. Plus, if that was true, then for that one
time Sean did the right thing, there were a great many he didn’t. Krista had
personally witnessed the morning after, and personally heard a chick or two
crying in the bathroom. It didn’t change anything.
Sean was staring at her, though,
awaiting confirmation. Like a dog that sat on command, he wanted to know his
good work was noticed. That ego of his—it was out of this world.
“Well, that’s something,” she said
unconcernedly. Sean went back to his beer. “Anywho, be that as it may, Cindy is
a bitch.”
Sean nodded.
“Anyway—oh man, she told everyone I
went speed dating?”
“Yup.”
“Said I couldn’t get a man the
traditional way so I had to do it the new age way, or something stupid like
that, right?”
“In so many words, yes. How did you
know?” Sean looked at her suspiciously.
“I was in high school, Sean. This
is classic girl clique crap. Oh man, if I wanted to, I could totally—yeah, I’m
going to. Wait, no I can’t—WAIT! I can!” Krista was definitely buzzed now. And
riled up.
Instead of telling her to quiet
down, or shut up, as Kate and Jaz might, Sean had that bemused expression
again.
“Sorry,” she whispered. “I just
really want to take that bitch to the cleaners. I only have one friend, though.
Tommy. He’s shit for this kind of thing.”
“Wait until Marcus befriends you.
You’ll have a lot more options.”
“Marcus?—Oh, that hot guy on our
team?”
“Uh…the…”
“Just say yes. You know he’s hot.”
“I will not be admitting it.”
“Whatever. He’s a gossip, is he?”
“The biggest.”
“Hmmm. Okay. Operation
Cindy-is-going-down is in the works.”
“She’s had rumors spread about her
before, you know,” Sean warned. “She wasn’t the one who came out on bottom.”
“She never went up against the Prom
Queen, now did she? I know my way around girl-reputation-espionage. Not
happily—I regret most of it, but she deserves it.”
“True. So about speed dating.”
“Oh right. So yeah …” Krista told
him about meeting Paul and how he got her number. They’d gone out about a week
after, to a movie and dinner. Since then, they’d kept up the dating game,
trying to get to know each other. She wanted to fall in love and get over her
trust issues and fears. Paul was a steady, safe approach to that dream, and she
wanted it to work out.
“And this Ben is …”
“My roommate.”
“Who helped you with the
presentation?”
“One track mind, jeez. Also
correct.”
“Well, then the dates must have
been okay.”
Krista hesitated. Sean wanted the
dirt. He wanted her personal dating history. Krista could understand why—who
didn’t want gossip?—but she didn’t want to share her personal life with this
man. He was too close as it was.
On that note, Krista decided it was
probably time to call it a day. All she was going to do was get drunker and
start revealing things she would rather not have a work person know. What’s
worse, this road would lead her to the ex-boyfriend. For the second time. That
was a scab she didn’t want picked.
She finished her beer and shook her
head when the bartender walked by. Sean followed suit. Apparently he was just
as eager to leave his personal life out of his work life. Good news.
They waited for the bill with
various forms of small talk, neither wanting to divulge too much classified
information, but having a hard time thinking of anything else. When the bill
came, and before Krista could reach for it, Sean had his credit card down and
was pushing it toward the end of the bar.
“You don’t need to cover the whole
thing,” she said, reaching the now-great distance over his large arm to recover
the check.
Sean shook his head and put his
hand slowly, and hesitantly, on her shoulder to stop her reach. A blaze of
warmth flashed into her arm from his soft touch. The heat turned into liquid
fire as it raced through her veins. She felt a rush--like she was awake for the
first time in a long time. The clouds parted and spring flowers bloomed. She
made an “Oh!” sound as she turned to him, expecting him to be as mystified as
she was.
He was smiling at her with perfect
composure, his gorgeous features alight in good humor. His body was at ease on
the bar stool, drawing looks from all the women in line of sight. His
effortless beauty radiated his strong body in repose. Krista wanted to run her
hand up his shoulder and feel more of the molten heat. She wanted skin contact.
Intimate skin contact in which to explore that feeling.
Seeing her frazzled, searching
look, Sean’s brow furrowed. “What’s wrong? You okay?”
“Kate is going to be so pissed at
me.”
“For what?” Sean glanced around the
bar, trying to identify the problem.
“What? Doesn’t matter. Uh, but I
can pay for half of that.”
“Do you drink much?” Sean asked as
the check was whisked away.
She watched it go, aware Sean was
watching her quizzically. She turned to him. “Do you ever get the feeling that
the cosmos is playing one giant joke on you?”
The quizzical look continued its path
into baffled.
“I can usually hold my liquor, yes.
Just—I don’t know. No excuse for me.”
“I take it this is not the
embarrassing moment I should keep to myself?”
“This? Oh God no. No, this is
normal embarrassing behavior. Were you even there for my first week?”
Sean sniffed, because yes, he
certainly was, “Got it.”
The check came back and Sean signed
for it and gracefully got off the stool. He looked untouched by the Guinness.
Krista slid off haphazardly. Her
toe got stuck in the leg of the stool and she stumbled into the bar. She caught
and steadied herself, keeping clear of Sean’s attempt to help. “Seriously—I got
it.”
He smiled, his eyes turning an
intoxicating violet in the failing light. He obviously wasn’t convinced.
“Can you get home okay?” he asked
as he held the door open for her to leave the bar.