Buck (Rope 'n Ride #1) (15 page)

“All I know is we need this show. We need these people. If we piss them off and they cancel us, we don’t have the money. Which means we lose the ranch—to Ennis.”

Several brothers groaned and Lane leaned back abruptly, folding his arms over his chest as if to say Ennis would need to go through him to get the land.

“Can’t even take a piss without someone following me into the bathroom. And they’re nosy fuckers, always in our business,” West said.

“I know.” Buck shot Channing a look, catching a twinkle in her eyes and a tilt to the corner of her pouty lips. His cock stirred and he planted a hand on her thigh beneath the table. She shifted into his touch.

“It’s their business to dig deep into our lives. Nobody wants to see what we do on the surface. They can get that off ESPN. They want to know what drives us, what makes us tick,” Channing said.

Again, she silenced them. Buck’s chest swelled with pride. She was definitely handling them better than he ever had.

“If you just feel what you need to feel and live your lives to the fullest, you’ll forget the cameras are even there. The other day when we went shopping for a wedding dress, I never noticed the cameraman.”

“Not even when he was in the fitting room with you, Channing?” Wynonna asked.

Buck growled.

“Kidding! Just kidding, big brotha.” Wynonna offered her sweetest smile.

Channing looked into Buck’s eyes and then glanced around the table. “I only cared about how I looked and felt when I found the right dress. And sharing the experience with Wynonna and your ma.”

“Does that mean you’re actually marrying Buck? He said you were on the outs.” Ridge scuffed his knuckles across his jaw thoughtfully.

Channing blinked. And Buck felt her pulling away from him. She could only move a fraction away from his hand, but her soul was flying off at lightning speed.

Dammit. He needed to talk to her right now, before his dumb-ass siblings fucked anything else up for him.

He groped under the table for her hand and squeezed it. Her fingers felt icy in his, and he didn’t think the air conditioning had caused it.

“We’re definitely getting married.” Buck’s throat clogged with emotion as he spoke to his family. “I’m in love with Channing, and I need her by me. I can’t imagine living without her.” He stared into her eyes.

The only response she gave was a stretching of her lips over her teeth in a mock smile.

Best thing to do right now was change the subject. He cleared his throat. “All I ask is that you try your hardest to get along with production. Our ranch is on the line.”

“As soon as we get home I say we hire a different lawyer. One who can find a way to get the land without us paying Ennis his balloon rate,” Ryder said matter-of-factly.

Everyone agreed. Channing remained silent. Worried more than he had been for weeks, Buck pushed away from the table. “Ryder, you hire the lawyer. Everyone else? Behave your asses.”

With that, Buck led Channing out of the restaurant. She made no protest but a bit of her glow had faded. She’d left some of her faith in him back at that table.

Chapter Twelve

Five wins turned into six. Team Calhoun-Franklin was back—and they were on fire. Channing had gotten the hang of caring for Maddie and Montana—they hadn’t tried to escape at all lately.

Luke was even all right now that she’d bailed him out. He was working steadily and didn’t seem to have fallen back into his gambling habit.

But Channing wasn’t feeling as hopeful as she had weeks before. They traveled so much she had no idea what city she awakened in. And when she was on the ranch, there was a whirlwind of wedding plans and shopping trips to supply stores. She had crates full of mason jars to fill with candles and set on tables, but she had no idea what to do about her groom.

Twisting her hands, she watched him seated atop Havoc, his hat tipped so low she wondered how he’d see the cattle to rope it. She leaned into the rail. Asher’s girls bounced up and down beside her, cheering for their daddy. What a rough road they had. It seemed Reese had skipped town, abandoning the girls to their father to raise. Asher was up to the task—but he was broken too.

All of these troubles crushed Channing, and she realized none of them were actually hers. She was only responsible for paying Buck back and getting herself out of the wedding. The fact that Buck had slipped to his family that they were on the outs told her that he was still uncertain.

But he didn’t sound uncertain back in that restaurant.

Their horses held utterly still, prepared to lunge out when the steer was loosed. Her heart counted down in time to the clock.

The animal burst forward, and Buck followed with a perfect lasso. The crowd went crazy and Channing screamed. The girls jumped up and down like Mexican beans. “Daddeeeeee! Daddeeeeeee!”

Asher snagged the back legs, and Buck fist-punched the air. Channing’s heart soared, knowing they had the fastest time. They were moving on to the next round. Which meant more highways and new cities to wake up in.

When Buck came in, he grasped her hand and looked into her eyes with a huge smile. But everything he did now made her suspicious. Was anything real anymore?

“C’mon, girls. Let’s go find your daddy and congratulate him.” Channing ushered the little dark-haired girls out of the arena. The camera crew was two steps behind her. They recorded the moment when Buck swept her off her feet and whirled her. And him crushing his lips down on hers, stealing her breath.

When he set her down, they turned to watch the girls run into their father’s arms.

Ridge and Ryder approached with happy words and thumps on the back. While they talked about their upcoming events, Asher came up to Channing with a smile.

“Thank you for seeing to my girls. I can’t ever show my true appreciation, Channing.”

“It’s nothing.” She smoothed her hand over each little shining dark head nestled against their father’s chest.

“You’re wrong. It’s definitely something. And I’d like to offer you part of my winnings for helping me.”

She waved him off but he let Montana slip to the ground and reached inside his leather vest to pull out a wad of cash. He pressed it into her palm with a dark, intense look she couldn’t argue with. She couldn’t wound his pride—not when he was already reeling from his wife’s actions.

She closed her fingers around the money. “Thank you.”

Buck’s arm came around her middle. He tugged her back against his chest, and part of her wanted to melt into him. But confusion took over. She needed some space.

Maybe she’d take the money and have a short getaway on her own—give herself time to think and figure out what she wanted. The only thing she knew was she did
not
want to bind herself to a relationship that wasn’t right for either her or Buck.

The men talked over her head and they all went to hear the final scores. Then Asher took his daughters and tucked them in the truck to drive home to Oklahoma. Buck and Channing waved them off.

When the taillights disappeared around the corner, Buck turned to her. “You know, you’re great with the girls. A natural.”

She lifted a shoulder in a shrug.

“Channing—” He broke off, his gaze darting sideways to the camera fixed on them. Breaking his own rule, he held up a hand over the lens. “Give us some privacy, for fuck’s sake.”

“Yeah, sure, man.” Brant took his equipment away, leaving them truly alone.

There was no choice but to say the hard words now. Channing drew a deep breath. “Buck, we need to talk about us.”

“I know.” The world seemed to enclose them in a private bubble. Not a car engine started and even the few birds that always circled rodeo events fighting over crumbs seemed to have roosted somewhere else.

She looked into Buck’s eyes. She felt like a rubber band, pulled in all directions and she had no idea where her center was anymore. Gulping back tears, she said, “I need some space, Buck.”

He jerked as if she’d slapped him. “Space.” His voice was gritty, dead.

Blinking back tears, she nodded. “It’s not easy for me to walk away but I need some time to think and I can’t do that here.” She spread her hands. “You, the crew, your family… Everything is influencing me.”

“Influencing your decision, you mean. To marry me.”

Unable to speak around the lump in her throat, she nodded.

He rubbed his fingers beneath his nose, his gaze slipping away from her. But not before she saw the twinge of pain in his eyes.

“How much time do you need?”

“I-I don’t know.”

“Am I supposed to fucking leave you here in Billings? How are you getting home?”

“I don’t know that either.”

His Adam’s apple worked in his throat, and his words came out sharp. “Are you done with me, Channing?”

“Please don’t ask me that, Buck. All I’m asking for is a few days alone, okay?”

“You’ll be here in the hotel?”

She looked around. “I guess so.”

He gave a short nod. “I’ll handle your bill.”

“You don’t have to—”

“It’s the least I can do for your trouble, Channing.” He raised a hand as if to stroke her hair and then dropped it to his side, where it hung in a fist.

Her chest was on fire and her heart breaking. Why did this suddenly feel so final? Surely he understood that she couldn’t make a decision one way or another when swept up by everything and everybody?

He started to walk away.

“Buck,” she called him back.

He stopped walking but didn’t turn.

A sob shook her chest. “Thank you.”

With a dip of his head, he walked on, leaving her alone. Just like she wanted, right?

* * * * *

Buck didn’t dare turn around and show Channing how goddamn hard it was for him to grant her wishes. What if she chose to walk away in the end? What if—

He couldn’t think about it without throwing a chair through a plate-glass window, so he just marched up to the hotel desk and paid for several nights stay for Channing. He also left money in an envelope for her to eat and to cover her needs.

Then he went to their room, and averting his gaze from her mess scattered across the dresser and all over the vanity, he packed. He stared at her body wash and on impulse tossed it into his bag. Then throwing his duffle strap over his shoulder, he walked out of the hotel with a fucking cameraman on his ass.

He found Ridge outside the arena packing up his gear and asked to hitch a ride for himself and Havoc.

“What’s wrong with your truck?”

“Nothing, I’m leaving it for Channing.”

“Leaving…” Ridge broke off, eyeing Buck until he felt like punching out a couple of his teeth.

He rumbled a noise of annoyance, and Ridge swung around to the back of the truck. “Sure, get in. No trouble to tow your ass home.”

Part of Buck thought about staying in the hotel on the down-low, keeping Channing from seeing him. He’d be there in case she needed him. But he knew that would only worsen things.

“Ready, bro?”

“Yeah.” Buck climbed into the truck and they circled to the stables to load Havoc. When he put his hand on his horse’s neck, he nearly broke. God, he might have lost her despite all his efforts recently. And they’d been doing okay until…

He stopped, staring at his horse’s shiny coat while his eyes blurred.

“Buck?” Ridge was the only brother he could tolerate right now. He wouldn’t prod him for answers and he was good at saying nothing at all. Just what he needed.

“Yeah, let’s load him up. C’mon, Havoc. You did a mighty fine job here in Billings.”

They were on the road few minutes later, leaving word with their family that they’d gone ahead. And of course there was an irritating camera blinking from the back seat, recording Buck’s misery as they drove away from the love of his life.

* * * * *

When Channing went back into the hotel, she stopped at the front desk to speak with them about extending her stay. And learned that Buck really had taken care of it. He’d also left her an envelope, which she had to take up to her room before opening because she couldn’t trust her emotions.

After walking into the room, she noted his belongings were gone and tears clogged her throat.

Better get it over with.

She tore open the envelope and found a thick stack of bills and a scribbled note.

Take your time and figure things out. But I’ll miss you. Buck~

Fighting big, ugly tears she set aside the note and money and curled up on the bed. Her mind worked furiously over too many issues in her life before she fell into a fitful sleep.

Then she showered and discovered Buck had taken her body wash, leaving her with his manly scent. Which she lathered herself with, half angry with him, half comforted. Even if she was alone, he was still with her. Because she was in love with him.

The next two days she slept and cried. She got in touch with her brother to ensure he was all right, which he was. And she watched a lot of TV.

The third day she got out of her room and walked through Billings. The city was large and culturally diverse, but she couldn’t help but look at every passing face and wonder if she’d spot Buck. Finally, she settled at a coffee shop with an outdoor seating area where she could people watch.

She hadn’t been on her own in far too long and hadn’t realized how much it had worn on her soul. Spending a lot of time with the Calhouns was one thing—the film crew was another.

None of them liked it—well maybe Wynonna. But it was a sacrifice for their ranch.

As she sipped a chai latte, she let her mind wander over the ranch and Ennis. A small breeze washed over her face but it didn’t bring the fresh hay scents she loved.

She missed home. And home to her was the Calhouns’ ranch. Which meant she had to save it as well. She’d made a tangle of things with her borrowing money from Buck to help her brother but there had to be something else she could do to help.

As she racked her brain and reached the bottom of her mug, she watched people come and go.

One man with the beautiful, deep complexion of a Native American took a seat a few tables away and opened a book to read. She gasped, her eyes going wide.

All at once she clearly saw the path—she just needed to call a certain friend at the courthouse.

Excitement whipped through her, and she practically ran back to the hotel. With a mountain of a problem moved in her mind, through the gap it created she clearly saw what she wanted—needed.

Buck.

Hands shaking, she sank to the bed and found her friend’s name in her contact list. When her friend’s chipper greeting sounded, she couldn’t help but smile. She related the plan to her friend and five minutes later had everything set in motion. Now she needed Ryder.

She tapped her lips with a forefinger. If he was anywhere near Buck when she called, Buck would be hurt that she wasn’t calling him. But Ryder had a certain acquaintance she hoped could help enact her plan.

Buck had his own role in this, and that was to get Ennis to the ranch. And to get his ass into town to be fitted for his tux.