Built To Last (Saltwater Springs #1) (15 page)

S
carlett woke
up to the feeling of crushing pain in her abdomen. She cried out while the taste of bile sat at the back of her throat. Pulling herself into the fetal position, she wrapped her arms around her stomach, her eyes closed tightly, her fingernails digging into her palms.

The agony intensified.

Oh God, the pain.

“Mom!” she called with as much volume as she could muster. Even the smallest movement seemed to set every nerve in her body aflame. “Mom!” Her breaths were quick and shallow.

Her teeth clenched down as a cold sweat broke out over her entire body.

At the same time the overhead light in her room flicked on, that’s when she felt something warm and wet. “Scarlett, honey. What’s wrong?” Her mom moved quickly to the bed, reached forward to pull the bed covers back, and gasped.

Bright red blood was all she saw before everything went black.

Scarlett shot up in her bed, her gaze darting around the darkened bedroom. With her hand to her chest, she tried to slow her breathing.

The dream.
It’d been years since she’d had that damn dream.

It used to be a part of her nightly routine, but as the years went on, the number of times it woke her up became fewer and farther between, eventually stopping altogether.

She swung her legs over the side of the bed, sliding off the mattress until her feet met the cold hardwood floor. Still trying to catch her breath, she made her way in the dark down to the kitchen for a drink of water.

After flicking on the kitchen light, she grabbed a glass from the cupboard and filled it with cold water from the faucet, practically gulping the entire thing down in one shot. Scarlett then placed the glass in the sink and braced herself on the counter, her head hung down.

The feeling of loss that usually accompanied the dream began to set in. It was always the same. Fear upon waking, followed soon enough by the aching in her gut, not only for what she’d lost but what she could never have again.

She’d been fooling herself to think that she could have a relationship with Luke and not feel it. Scarlett had managed to outrun the emotions thus far, but it had been only a matter of time before they caught up with her. She’d been greedy—wanting one more week, one more day with him, pretending that things weren’t what they were.

Luke represented everything she wanted so desperately in her life.

It was time to tell him the truth. It would be the end of what they had, but she’d known all along that they were on borrowed time. Now she’d prove it.

L
uke tapped
his hands anxiously on the steering wheel of his truck as he made his way through the dark streets over to the bakery. His work on Scarlett’s shop was finally complete, and he knew she’d be spending the entire week stocking and getting things ready for the grand opening.

Everything was coming together. The everything-that-could-go-wrong-did project that had been taking some of his attention from Scarlett’s job was done. Her bakery was finished. Now it was time to put his plan into action.

Luke’s gut churned as he imagined how surprised Scarlett would be when she found out. He hoped she’d think it was a good thing. Luke had faith in what was between them, which was what had propelled him to move forward with the idea in the first place.

He pulled his truck in front of the bakery, parked, and then hopped out. The lights were on inside, but Luke didn’t see her anywhere so he assumed she was in the kitchen. When he pulled on the door handle and it opened, Luke ground his teeth together.

“Lettie,” he called out. “You gotta start locking this door.”

Scarlett appeared from the kitchen, wiping her hands on a towel. “What are you doing here?” She looked shocked, which he wasn’t expecting. It wasn’t as if it were completely inconceivable that he’d come by.

Luke strode over to her, placing a chaste kiss on her lips. Then he took the towel from her hands and tossed it on the marble counter by the cash register. “You need to come with me.”

He reached for her hand and tried to lead her out from behind the counter, but she didn’t budge. “I can’t go with you…I…I have so much to do here.”

“C’mon.” He smiled. “I need to show you something.”

Scarlett shook her head. “I really can’t.” There was a sadness in her demeanor that he hadn’t seen since she’d first returned to town. No matter, what he had planned would push away any remaining melancholy she might have.

Luke dropped her hand, spread his legs, and crossed his arms over his chest. “I’m not taking no for an answer.”

Blowing a breath out, she turned to reach for her purse that was sitting on the counter. “Fine. I can’t be long though.”

He grinned. “I knew you’d see things my way. Let’s go.” Luke led her to the door with his hand on her lower back. He waited while she locked the place up then tossed the keys into her purse. When she turned, she wrapped her arms around herself.

“Here, take my jacket.” Luke began to remove his coat, but she put her hand up in protest.

“I’m fine. Let’s just go.”

Pursing his lips, he helped her into his truck and shut the passenger door. Scarlett seemed more tense than usual, but Luke brushed it off as he made his way to the driver’s side of the truck. She had a lot on her mind—her business was launching in a week and there was a lot riding on it.

When Scarlett saw the surprise he had in store for her, she’d rest easy knowing he’d do whatever he could to make her happy.

L
uke drove
Scarlett through the familiar streets of Saltwater Springs, something they’d done hundreds of times before. It was both comforting and familiar, which made what she had to do even more difficult.

She’d been unprepared when he surprised her at the bakery. Since coming to the conclusion that she needed to be honest with him about the past—and their non-existent future— she’d been trying to figure out how and when to tell him. Scarlett knew that what she had to say would hurt him, so she wanted to deliver the news in the kindest way possible.

She hadn’t figured out the best way to do that, and yet here they were. Off to some sort of surprise when everything in her wanted to run. Again.

But she couldn’t. This time she’d have to stay and face the fallout.

It wasn’t until they turned down a familiar driveway lined with century-old trees that she was drawn from her thoughts and realized where they were—her childhood home. Every muscle in her body tensed and her hand absently moved to clutch her abdomen.

“What are we doing here?” she whispered, panic setting in.

“Trust me.”

Luke’s truck pulled into the circular drive and stopped in front of the steps leading up to the stately columns and portico that ran the width of the house. In a daze, Scarlett opened the door and got out of the truck, unable to help herself from climbing the stairs to the home. She’d spent most of her life in this house and it called to her—never mind the fact that she didn’t belong here anymore.

The night sky blanketed everything outside, but the exterior lights had been left on, highlighting the fact that the green shutters had been repainted.

Why would Luke bring her here?

His footsteps echoed into the night on the stairs behind her. “I want to show you something.” He placed his hand on her lower back and began guiding her toward the front door.

When logic kicked in, she resisted, planting her feet. “We can’t go in there, Luke. The new owners—”

“Lettie.” He chuckled. “When are you going to trust me?”

He stepped in front of her and swung the front door wide open. “C’mon,” he said, gesturing with his hand.

Why was it so hard to step into the home she’d grown up in when it was something she’d done thousands of times in her life? Curiosity about what other changes the new owners had made won out, and Scarlett’s feet moved forward of their own accord. Her heart thundered in her chest as she stepped over the threshold.

The interior was lit as if someone had been expecting them. She gasped when she took it all in, her hand flying up to cover her mouth. The home had been restored to its former glory. No longer in a state of weathered disrepair, someone had put in the time—and money—to bring life back into the property. As her gaze darted from one room to the next, she realized that some things
had
changed.

The morning room had been painted a pale yellow, whereas her mother had always decorated it in blue when she’d been young. The large hanging light fixture in the foyer had been changed to something less outdated, yet still traditional. The wood floors were no longer dull with age but gleamed as if made of glass.

The familiar feeling of failure over having to sell the home enveloped her, but seeing the property look as magnificent as it once did was a salve to that. At least another family would now grow to love this home as much as hers had.

Luke remained silent as she took in the empty space and she turned to him now. “I don’t understand why you brought me here. We should go before the new owners find us.”

Luke reached for her hand, giving it a squeeze before he responded. “Lettie, I
am
the new owner.”

Scarlett’s breath caught in her throat and she was unable to speak. When she regained her senses, she pulled her hand from Luke’s. “You bought this place?”

He shook his head. “Not originally, no. A would-be investor bought it with plans to overhaul the place and make a profit. He hired me to do the work, but turns out it was more than he was capable of financially.” His gaze left hers to take in the space around them. “This house has old bones that needed a little extra lovin’ before they’d cooperate. It was a big job.”

“This is where you’ve been running off to…”

He nodded. “Yeah. Seemed it was one crisis after another with this place. She’s as stubborn as someone else I know.”

“But you said
you
owned it,” Scarlett said, still trying to make sense of it all.

“When my client ran out of money, I made him an offer he couldn’t refuse. He accepted, and I finished up the renovations.” He shrugged.

She took another moment to appreciate all the work he’d done on the place. To have accomplished all of this…it had to have been a labor of love. Her heart squeezed painfully at the thought.

“So what are you going to do with it now?”

A small smile tugged at the corner of Luke’s mouth. “Well, that depends…” Then he sunk down to one knee in front of her and took her left hand in his.

Scarlett trembled as her heart shattered into a million pieces.

“Lettie, I’ve loved you since you were a teenager. I loved you from afar even when we were apart. You’ve always been with me”—he smacked his hand over his heart—“even when you weren’t. If there’s one thing my mother’s illness has taught me, it’s to seize the moment. Who knows how long any of us have left?” He let go of her hand and dug into his jean pocket, emerging with a small, black jewelry box. “I know it probably seems too soon to you. You’re the kind of woman that likes to take her time and think of the one-million-and-one possibilities, but I waited a decade to have you back in my life again. I’m not waiting any longer for the two of us to start our lives together as husband and wife.”

Luke opened the box to reveal a stunning emerald-cut diamond engagement ring with baguettes along the band. Tears pricked her eyes as she tried to hold it together.

“Luke…”

“Hang on, I’ve got more to say.” He inhaled deeply before continuing. “I bought this place because of how much you love it. You spent your childhood here, and I know you’d hoped to raise your own kids here one day.” His words cut like a knife to her heart. “We used to talk about all the children we’d have, and I realize you were young back then, but you’re still that same girl at heart. I want us to live here and start a family of our own, just like you always wanted…”—the knife twisted in her chest—“like we always talked about. So…Miss Scarlett Devereaux, will you do me the honor of becoming my wife?”

Agony cleaved her chest in two as the tears ran down her face. Scarlett looked down at Luke and tried to commit his expression to memory. The love, the hope, the possibility of a future together. Because she was about to shatter his vision of that future and send the pieces cascading down, leaving only broken, serrated glass in its wake.

The enormity of the full circle moment gripped her as Luke pulled the ring from the case and reached for her left hand. This was the place where the tragedy had occurred, and it was the same place where she’d now lay herself bare.

L
ooking back
, Luke knew that if he hadn’t been so caught up in the excitement and anticipation of the moment, he’d have seen the signs. But that wasn’t the case. So when he’d been about to place the sparkling diamond on Scarlett’s finger and she’d ripped her hand away, his mouth hung open in shock.

His gaze darted up to hers and he was met with such sorrow in her eyes that it stole his breath. He rose from his position on the floor and set his hands on her shoulders.

“Lettie, what’s wrong?”

Instead of words, he was met with sobs. Luke wrapped his arms around her and rubbed her back, trying to provide her a small measure of comfort—for what exactly, he wasn’t sure. The unease in his gut grew as the minutes ticked by and she still hadn’t composed herself.

Being proposed to was an emotional moment, especially with everything they’d been through. Maybe that, coupled with being back in her family home and the loss of her parents, was proving to be too much. Inside, he knew it was something more. Scarlett was a strong Southern woman and didn’t buckle easily.

When he couldn’t take it any longer, he gently pulled her away from his chest. Her head shook back and forth while she mumbled, “I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry.”

“Will you please tell me what’s wrong? I can’t fix it if I don’t know what it is,” he said, desperate.

“You can’t fix this,” she whispered. Since she wouldn’t look him in the eye, Luke tilted her chin up with his finger, forcing her watery green eyes to meet his.

“Tell me what’s going on.” It was a demand now more than a plea. He couldn’t stand to see her in such pain and not know the cause.

Sniffling, she brushed her cheeks free of the tears and drew in a shuddering breath. “Luke, I can’t give you what you want out of life.”

“Lettie,
you’re
all I want.” She shook her head frantically from side to side, biting her lip. “If I have you, I have everything.”

A lone tear rolled down her cheek. “That’s not true. You want a family.”

Luke brushed some hair off her face and tucked it behind her ear. “Baby, so do you. I know you do. And we can do that…together.”

She nodded her agreement, but she still had that tortured look in her eyes. “I do want that, and I want to give it to you
so
badly. But I can’t.”

“What are you—?”

“I can’t have children, Luke. Not anymore.”

His hands dropped of their own accord. Luke stood and stared at the woman he loved—the woman he wanted to bear his children. She’d just told him it was never going to happen and he wasn’t able to process the information.

“What are you talking about?”

Scarlett pressed her lips together before she continued. “Right before I left town, I woke up in bed one night. I was in a lot of pain…there was blood everywhere…” She trailed off, and it was obvious she was trying to collect herself as she looked down to the floor. The thought of her waking up alone in bed in that state, and all alone…she must have been so scared.

“My mom called the ambulance, and it turned out I was pregnant.” Her declaration had his heart struggling to find its natural rhythm. “I had a cervical ectopic pregnancy that caused me to hemorrhage in my sleep. I almost lost my life, Luke.” Her gaze swept up from the floor to find his, and he staggered back a step. This was too much information to take in.

“The doctors had to perform emergency surgery and they did a hysterectomy in order to save my life. I can never have children of my own, Luke—ever.”

Luke was shell-shocked and felt like he was in a room where someone had set off a flash bomb. There were so many questions and competing emotions that he didn’t know what to think or where to start.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” he whispered.

She shook her head as a look of shame crept into her eyes. “I let my parents convince me to leave town. They were angry that I’d gotten pregnant in the first place. They didn’t want anyone knowing and said I needed to move on with my life…that you were no good for me and this whole thing was just further proof of that. I didn’t agree with them, but I knew I could no longer give you all the things we’d talked about. I thought it was best if I left and let you move on with your life.”

The tears were streaming down her face now, her eyes red and bloodshot. Luke fought back his own tears pricking the corners of his eyes. All those years ago…he was almost a father…and he’d never known.

“I’m sorry that I didn’t tell you sooner,” she said quietly.

“Sorry!? You’re sorry?” Shock quickly morphed into anger. Luke spun on his heel and pushed his hands through his hair, not even sure where to start. “I had a right to know.” He turned back around and pointed at her accusingly as blood pumped furiously through his veins, the sound roaring in his ears.

“I was ashamed, Luke. I felt like I’d let us down. And I was angry at my body for turning on me and taking away one of the things I’d always wanted—that
we’d
always wanted. My parents were pressuring me at a time when I wasn’t strong enough to push back. I was young and stupid. I was in mourning. Take your pick.”

Luke smacked his chest. “I deserved to know. I should have been able to mourn the loss, too. To help you through it! We could’ve gotten through it together, but you didn’t give me the chance!”

Scarlett sobbed into her hands, but he couldn’t find it in himself to comfort her this time. She hadn’t needed him all those years ago, so what made him think that she needed him now?

“I know. I realize that now,” she said between sobs.

“And you’ve known this whole time and never said anything? That was my baby, too.” He almost choked on the word.

Scarlett’s head fell to her chest and she wrapped her arms around herself, nodding through the tears.

Luke paced back and forth across the large foyer, his breathing shallow and his chest tight.

“This entire time I’ve thought that I must have done something wrong. I’ve replayed everything about our last weeks together in my head a thousand times, trying to figure out what exactly I’d said or done.”

“Luke—”

He stopped at the door. “Let’s go. I’m taking you home.” He didn’t wait for her. His large strides quickly ate up the space between the door and the truck.

Luke climbed in, slammed the door shut, and started the truck in one fluid motion. He stared straight ahead, his heart pounding so hard in his chest it felt as if it would dent his ribcage. Eventually Scarlett climbed into the truck, and seconds after she closed the door, his foot was on the gas pedal.

He had to get away from her. He couldn’t bear to be near the woman who had lied to him for so long and was now the cause of all his pain. They rode in complete silence back to Scarlett’s place. When he slammed on the brakes in front of her house, Luke couldn’t bring himself to even glance in her direction as she opened the door of the truck.

“I’m sorry,” she whispered. “You’ll never know how sorry I am.”

The truck door closed behind her and she was gone. Once again she was as lost to him as if she’d bolted from town. Because this time she’d stolen something from him that he didn’t think he could recover—hope.