Bullied (12 page)

Sister Donna started by reading stories to us and telling us how much fun we could have after we learned to read. Before that, we had to learn the alphabet. That is where my Catholic School education begins. Once every morning, she asks us to put our heads down on our hands and take a little nap. She taught us to spread our fingers and put them on the hard wooden desk before putting our faces down on top of our hands. I was surprised how comfortable this was and how fast I would fall asleep. This school thing was certainly more interesting than just hanging out in my house but finding out all that I have to learn is surprising.

When it is 2:30 in the afternoon, we can go home. The rest of the school does not get out until 3:30 so we are the only kids leaving at that time. We exited our classroom, and most of the kids met their parents who were there to pick them up. The students, whose parents had not yet arrived, had to stand in a group in front of the building near the center of the front area until they showed up. Just a very few of us started our short walks home alone. I walked this route many times with my Mom but this is the first time I was alone.

Walking home alone seems like an adventure, but, as Mom taught me, I have to be careful and look around a lot. I am very cautious to stop and look both ways before crossing every street. On my long trek home, there were only five streets to cross without much traffic in the afternoon on any of them, before I arrived at my house on Main Street. Main Street, itself, has a lot of traffic but I do not have to cross it. To my surprise, the walk, after making it a few times, was not scary at all and gave me a sense of freedom I had never experienced before.

On the way home, I pass The Boys Club, and, since I was a boy, thought I might like to go to go there sometime. Taking up one entire block on one side of the street of the four blocks that I have to walk every day, the Boys Club was in a large old home with fading light yellow paint. This rectangular home with two stories was in the front and middle of a large lot and had a sign over the front door. There is a running track directly behind the house, as well as a baseball diamond located on the right rear part of the lot. Outdoor basketball courts were on the left rear. Another smaller old two-story house, the same color as the main house, also sat on the rear of the lot. The Boys Club looked like a great place for kids to have fun and I would ask my Mom about it.

I have to make this walk twice a day. Starting out from home about 8 AM, I stay at the school all day, eating my bagged lunch that Mom made for me. After eating, we go out in the playground behind the school and play games under close supervision of Sister Donna and other Sisters of Charity. School is now just part of my normal daily routine.

I talked to my Mom about joining the Boys Club. She said it was okay and even gave me the fifty cents that I would need to join. Therefore, one day after school, I walked into the Boys Club front door, stopped at the first window on the left inside the front door and asked if I could join. The big adults I met there were very surprised that a person my size and age would walk in the door alone and want to join the club. I guess not too many people only four years old were members. They took my fifty cents, gave me some forms for Mom to complete and asked me to bring them back the next day. The next day after school, I was an official member of the Boys Club.

After I joined, a big man named Henry that lives in the two-story house behind the Boys Club took me around and showed me various parts of the club. My favorite was the game room downstairs in the large basement, where I could play some games like flat pool that is a regular game of billiards, except it uses large flat wafers instead of round balls. There were also some other pool tables that used balls instead of wafers but I had to be much older to play those games. There was also Ping-Pong and many board games I could check out for a while and then return before leaving. This looks like paradise to me. Just imagine all this great stuff and only two blocks from my house. I am so excited.

Henry was very thorough in explaining that there was no fighting in the club at all or the people fighting would not be able to go there anymore. At the time, I did not really know what a fight was, except I remembered my Daddy going outside with those men a few months before he died. The thought of fighting scared me.

“I do not fight!” I said loudly and emphatically. Henry laughed. I guess he could see I meant it.

I walked home in time to see my Grandmother before Mom got home from work. I showed her my small, hard, grey Boys Club membership card, and she was very happy for me. Life is sometimes scary but it is definitely an adventure. Grandma even mentioned that it probably would be okay with her and my mother if I stopped off at the Boys Club after school sometimes as long as I let them know ahead of time. I thought that was a good idea.

After attending kindergarten just a few weeks, I was walking home about 3:30PM, instead of 2:30PM after spending a little extra time with Sister Donna after school, I ran into a group of big kids. One of them started making fun of my red hair and poking me in the chest with his finger.

“Hey, little red head with orange spots all over, you look really funny, like a clown.” he shouted. “Red the clown, red the clown,” he shouted.

I began to run toward home. To my surprise, all of them chased me, while yelling and laughing loudly. There was about five of them and it was a good thing I was close to the Boys Club, because I simply ran up the lawn and into the front door. They all yelled at me, “You can’t go in there, you have to be a member!”

I went in the door anyway, and showed the person at the front desk my membership card. The kids who had chased me were standing just outside the front door and seemed very surprised that, at my small size and age of only four, I was already a member of the Boys Club. Since they were not members, they could not come inside the building. They all walked away laughing. I was relieved and grateful for the Boys Club. Why did these kids pick on me and chase me? Those boys are about twice my size. They all looked like giants to me.

The person behind the desk that looked at my card was that big man, Henry, who had showed me around when I joined.

“Are you OK?” he asked, looking out the open doorway at the kids who chased me. He grinned knowingly. I nodded and he said,

“You remember the stairs downstairs to the game room are over there, Ok?”

“Ok”, I said, and walked down the stairway to the basement to play a game of “flat pool” by myself. After a half hour or so, I left the boys club for home and, since those kids were gone, the two-block trip home was peaceful.

There are so many interesting things to learn at school besides the alphabet, but the experience of the bigger kids chasing me was a frightening experience. I thought about this event. Well, running to the Boys Club certainly turned out to be a good idea, I thought. One of the other things, difficult for me to figure out was how to treat the girls that were in my class. Yes, I did have a sister and a Mom and I knew that they were different from boys because they did not have anything between their legs and Mom had those big things on her chest called breasts. However, the females in my class seem so different about so many things. One day in my kindergarten class, Sister reassigned us to different seats and I had to sit behind this little girl named Patty.

Whenever she had a chance, she would turn around and talk with me. She had nice brown hair, blue eyes, a nice friendly smile, and was very funny. I thought she was very special and she became my friend. I told my Mom about Patty. One day my Mom was attending a school event and Patty was there with her Mom. They all met and my Mom told her Mom that I had told her about Patty. Therefore, she told Mom that she could bring me over to Patty's house sometimes, so we could play. This was a great idea, I thought. I liked Patty, even if she was a girl.

One day we visited Patty's house, and Patty and I went out in the backyard to play while our Moms talked in the house. Patty loves to play just about any game. In addition, the thing that I like most about her is that she can climb trees! I never thought any girl could climb trees! One day I asked Patty if she liked movies and she said she did. I talked to my Mom and the next day at school, Patty and I arranged to go and see a movie together, if it was OK with our parents. When I asked my Mom about seeing a movie on the weekend with Patty, she said,

“You are the man and she is the woman so it is your responsibility to pay Patty’s way into the movie,” Mom said.

“Ok, Mom, I will. Will you give me the money?”

“Of course”, Mom said with a very unusual grin on her face and I thought there was also a bit of color on her face that I did not see very often.

“Who knows, Patty is a very nice girl and she might be really important to you some day,” Mom said.

“What do you mean, Mom?” I asked.

“Oh, you will find out some day”, she said.

I did not understand that answer at all. Funny, she gave me just about that same answer when I asked her why she used to spend so much time with Daddy in the bathroom when he was taking a bath. Taking a bath was so different from going to a movie, so why do I get the same answer? In addition, Mom had never referred to me as a “man” before. Going to a movie with a friend like Patty seemed to be a normal thing to do but, for some reason, Mom seemed to think this movie event was very special.

Mom gave me 28 cents for admission because the fee for both Patty and I was 14 cents apiece. She also gave me some other change for some popcorn or candy. My favorite candy is Good and Plenty licorice candy. Therefore, when Saturday afternoon finally came around, Mr. and Mrs. Jones accompanied Patty and me to the movie at the Lyric Theatre on Washington Boulevard. Mr. and Mrs. Jones were very surprised when I insisted on paying for Patty's admission into the movies. Patty looked at me in a very strange way when I did this. She is my very first friend, but there are some other unusual feelings that go on inside me when I am near Patty.

Weeks later

This is just another morning and I am getting ready for school. Mommy did not have time to make Lauren and I breakfast, this morning. Therefore, I have to go get my breakfast downstairs with Grandma. I walk down the stairs one-step at a time holding on to the railing as Mom taught me to do. At the bottom of the first flight, I turn to my left and go down the short flight of eight steps to the back porch of my grandmothers’ house. The windows, now on my left, look out on the backyard with grass and a big apple tree. The entry door to the first floor residence is on my right. I notice the big black iron frog on the floor. It is the doorstop when the back door is open during summer months. The frog was very scary when I was younger. When I was smaller and could only crawl, he looked like a very large and ferocious creature. Now, it is just a big black piece of iron to me that looks like a friendly frog and makes a good doorstop.

I walk into the kitchen, and see my Grandma already has breakfast on the table. I can hear my sister Lauren coming down the stairs behind me. She is a little slower than I am in this process. Since I am a little bigger now I can sit in a regular chair, even though it is a little low for me sometimes. My sister Lauren now gets to sit in my old white chair with the nice tray. This morning, we have bacon and eggs, Grandpa's favorite breakfast, but he is already gone to work. I eat the bacon first because it is my favorite and tastes yummy and is crunchy. Next, I dunk my slice of toast into the egg yolk, then finish the egg white with my fork, eat the slice of toast and it is time to go to school. Grandma gives me a kiss, wipes some egg off my face and hands me the book that I almost forgot. I leave by the front door, which has an old-fashioned egg shaped doorknob inside, and another egg shaped doorknob on the outside so it is easy for me to open. Now on the front porch with a grey wood deck, I walk down the five stairs to the front walkway. Some other kids of all ages are now passing by on their way to school. I am still alone during my walk to school because Lauren cannot go to school yet; she is not big enough.

School every day is okay but it is a lot of work. The weather in September is starting to get a little colder with all the reddish brown leaves on the trees. Even October is sometimes pleasant, but when we get to November, it is even colder. Walking today is okay. Up ahead I see some bigger kids ahead of me. One of them turns around, looks at me and says something to the other kids. They all laugh and keep walking. Behind me, I hear some other kids coming. It is two brothers. They are bigger than I am and they can walk a lot faster. They pass me by and keep walking ahead of me. Minutes later, as I am getting near to the front entrance of Saint Ambrose elementary school, I see Sister Donna standing just inside the entryway near the door that opens into the hallway. She helps me with my coat and scarf and hangs it up in the cloakroom for me. Then she points to the classroom, and I walk past her into the kindergarten classroom.

Class is interesting, because they teach us all sorts of things, and we pray a lot. Sister Donna is nice, and most of our schoolwork is listening to different stories Sister Donna reads to us. It is also about learning the alphabet, taking naps, eating lunch and learning about our wonderful Catholic religion. I am getting to know my classmates, which are all very different from each other. Some are quiet, and some make a lot of noise. Some smell very different. Some are happy and some are sad all the time. Some of the kids also wet their pants. All this keeps Sister Donna very busy, but she looks like she loves every minute of it. She is usually smiling or has that very caring look on her face. She is wonderful.

Sitting in this desk with a grooved place to put a pencil is a very new experience for me. As I sit in my row with about fifty little kids around me, I feel almost overwhelmed by the activity. Everything feels blurry in my head and I am trying to figure out what to do. Sister Donna says, in the front of the room, “Listen up children, we are going to go over the alphabet” “Patrick, pay attention and look up here”. She then starts pointing to the letters on large pieces of paper hung around the room at the top of the blackboard running from the front of the room, over the door, and down the wall toward the rear of the room.