Butterflies in Honey (Growing Pains #3) (13 page)

Sean was leaning against the wall in the
entryway of the department. With butterflies, Krista turned to him
expectantly. The fastest way to dispel the rumors was to act as if
they were unfounded. Plus,
she was a freaking
professional!

“Please continue,” he said to Krista
casually, crossing his arms.

Krista turned back to her department. “Okay,
as I was saying. There are some big changes. One of those changes
is that I will be stepping up into Phil’s role. Phil was given a
fantastic opportunity in his home region, away from all us
Californian liberals.” Everyone laughed nervously. It was widely
known what Phil thought of California. “I wanted to let you know
from the horse’s mouth that Kate Dunlevy will step up into my role.
Let’s give her a round of applause for being bullied into the job
no one else wanted.”

Everyone clapped and gave Kate catcalls. She
was well liked within the department. Where Krista was never one of
the crew, Kate fit right in. It was perfect for her to step up into
that position.

“I will be heavily training her over the next
few weeks, so get friendly while you can. Once she starts my job
she’ll be tired and stressed out, having to save you all from me.”
More claps and laughter.

With a smile Krista turned back and walked
over to Sean. “What’s up?”

“Office.”

“Aye, aye.”

They went in and sat down. Krista had yet to
move into the larger office…or pack.

Sean looked drawn and weary. “Krista, a
couple things. First, Tory is planning a kind of retreat for all
new VPs and upper management. It’s a team building exercise. He
likes to promote from within a lot of the time, so we’ll be going
up against people that have been working together for years and
years. We’re the underdogs, here.”

Sean stopped to get confirmation that she
understood. Being that only a person that didn’t speak English
wouldn’t, her response was, “Okay.”

“I just…Look, all on the table, I want to
win. Yes, it’s about my pride. I have a new job and I want to look
good. So, for that, I need your help.”

“Sean, obviously I’m going to do the best I
can.”

“I know that. I know that you will. It’s
just…Okay, I don’t have any right to ask, but I was hoping for your
support.”

“Sean—seriously, have you lost your mind?
You’re my boss. Of course you have my support. You know my track
record—I’ll help you in any way I can to achieve the common goal.
I’m in it for the long haul. No matter what
it
is. So, yeah,
no worries.”

Sean stood up slowly, looked out through the
windows, and then closed the office door. He sat, gathered himself
while looking at his hands in his lap, took a deep breath, and
said, “Did you notice that when you heard our presentation with
Dexico that Ray wasn’t in the meeting?”

Krista continued looking at him like he’d
lost his sanity. “Uh…yeah. So?”

“Well, I didn’t need him in the meeting.”

Sean looked at Krista expectantly. She looked
back,
seriously
concerned that she’d done irreparable damage
when she’d slapped him.

When he continued to stare, Krista lost her
patience. “Sean, I really haven’t the slightest idea what you’re
talking about.”

He sighed for probably the hundredth time. “I
know. Okay, look, you remember I told you he was my crutch?” Krista
nodded. “Well, I still need a crutch. I still need a supportive
member of the audience to perform to. One that knows me. I didn’t
need him in that meeting…because I had you.”

Krista tensed her muscles to keep from doing
jazz-hands with a shocked face and saying, “
Whaaaa?”
She
hadn’t realized she’d rated so high, not even when she was with him
a million years ago. She didn’t realize he’d come to depend on her.
The information didn’t help, but it was good to know purely for the
sake of her ego.

“He couldn’t move to L.A.,” Sean continued,
looking at his hands as he fidgeted in his lap. It was obvious Sean
was not enjoying admitting any of this. “His life is in the North
Bay. He’s got a family. Roots. But…well, whatever the
reason—actually you know the reason—I needed to move down here. But
I figured it would work out because you were here. And I realize
you’ve lost trust in me…” Sean paused as he looked at her, lost his
nerve, and looked at her desk instead. He looked lost and
vulnerable. “I get why, and, like I’ve said, I don’t really have
any right to ask, but I was wondering if you would help me in that
respect?”

Sean looked like a puppy that just got hit
with a newspaper. Krista chuckled, which had his eyes coming up in
disbelief.

“Sorry…” she covered her mouth with her hands
and laughed harder. “Sorry, God,
sorry!
Sorry.” She slowed
herself down and stopped laughing. “Sorry, I’m just really hung
over, it’s been a long couple of weeks, and now this. It is all a
lot to handle in one sitting. I feel like a schizoid or something.
Laughing is better than throwing things, so…”

Sean looked back down at his lap.

“Okay…well, you know, I’m not going to sleep
with you or anything, but of course I’ll give you my support. We’ve
had problems before, but we’ve always had a strong working bond. I
hadn’t intended to undermine that. Unless you were sleeping with
Ray?”

Sean smiled but left his eyes downcast. “No.
I wasn’t sleeping with Ray, no.” His eyes came back up, half
relief, and half sadness. “Thanks, Krista. I’m sorry. For
everything. It isn’t enough, I know, and you were right. I see that
now. But I never claimed to be normal. Or even functional.” His
smile dissolved into a puddle of hurt.

“Well, me either Sean. Functional, I mean.
Normal, also, I guess. Hell, you got in a fist fight with my demon.
But I wouldn’t leave you stranded. And…you know me—I’m going to win
regardless of the opposition. So, there.”

Sean let out a breath. “Okay.”

And just like that, unbelievably perhaps,
they got back to the place they knew best. They might be crap in
personal life, and Krista still planned to take his job away from
him, but they were stars in the work world when they were together.
Krista was still incredibly hurt by him, and angry beyond belief,
but she had to push all that down to reach her goal. First step,
best region. Next step, promotion. Eye on the prize.

“What’s the next issue?” Krista asked,
noticing people looking into the office as they passed by. “Because
I have a really demanding boss and I have a lot of work to do.”

Sean’s face lit into a boyish grin. “Next
order of business is a professional favor.”

“Jesus, Sean. Don’t ask for much, do
you?”

“No, not much. I want to bring Marcus to the
conference. He is the best person I have ever met at making friends
and learning gossip. He has no parallel. I want to take him and get
him to make friends with the other regions. Get some gossip
channels open.”

“He’s gonna be pissed that he has to work
directly for you again.”

“Really? Why? I thought he liked working on
our team?”

“You make him work too hard.”

“Oh. Yes, I do. Anyway, he will have to go as
an administrative assistant. We are allowed two. That means we’ll
be down one.”

“I am not going as an assistant, Sean! No
way
! I am
insulted
that you—“

“Whoa, whoa, whoa!” Sean said with a smile.
“I was just going to ask if you could type up the notes I know you
will be taking anyway and send them to me. That’s all. Just if you
would share your work?”

“Oh. Okay,” she said, deflated. She was
prepared for war on that one. At the last minute she threw up a
finger, “But if I don’t feel like taking notes, I won’t!”

“Deal.”

“Fine. Now get out. You’ve sucked me into the
rumor mill and everyone keeps staring into my office.”

“
I
sucked
you
in? I think that
if you replay that slap, you might come up with a different
conclusion.”

“Yeah, sorry about that. I didn’t intend to
get violent.”

Sean got up and shrugged good-naturedly.
“I’ve had worse.”

“I’ve already apologized for that,” she said
without thinking.

Sean’s body went rigid and he turned to her.
They had a silent beat reliving their mutual past with Jim before
he let out a breath. “Well, I’ll just have to watch your bad
moods—“

He stopped mid-sentence, his eyes snagging on
her desk. Incredulity and surprise warred on his face. When his
eyes hit hers again, they were stuffed full to dripping with
love.

Confused at the sudden transformation, Krista
looked where his eyes had stopped. Her lucky mug grinned back.

“Oh. Yeah.” She shrugged. “What can I say—it
was lucky. I didn’t want to part with it.”

Sean looked at her like he knew the
subtext—
I didn’t want to part with you.
His look of
tenderness nearly had her tear ducts going active.

“Stop staring,” Krista said to pass the
moment, “it’s making me nervous.”

Sean cleared his throat. “Sorry. I thought it
would have jumped off your desk by now.” He meant the comment to be
light, but his voice was thick with feeling. He obviously knew what
her lucky mug meant to her, as she figured. And he knew her keeping
it meant her holding onto the memory of him. Of their time
together. It was ex
as
perating.

“Nah, no incident. But then, it hasn’t been
in your office in years. Who’s to say what’ll happen in our weekly
meetings?”

“Well,” Sean said, trying not to stare
fixedly at Krista, and failing. “I’ll try to be careful.”

“Okay, go away now. You’re freaking me
out.”

He smiled slightly. Then he turned to
leave.

It was the Monday before the big convention.
Marcus was beside himself excited to have his sole function be his
favorite hobby—gossip. He had dragged Krista out shopping and made
her spend a month’s salary on clothes. He wanted her looking her
best, but didn’t trust her fashion choices. Then he just went wild.
It was partly Krista’s fault. Marcus had great style; so after a
while, she just said yes to everything but the most slutty of his
choices.

Krista was on her way to the fifth floor
conference room for a last meeting before the conference. Sean
wanted to see where everyone was and give them time to work on his
notes before they all took, what was basically, a working holiday.
Krista wasn’t worried, of course. In the last month, she had gotten
through Sean’s list, taken over Phil’s spot, changed a bunch of
procedures, become further entrenched with her reputation as a
bitch, was more hated by the other managers if that were possible
(she still had no idea why), and got Kate up to speed. She hadn’t
had much time for a social life, but realized with dread she didn’t
really want one. She didn’t want to think about anything personal.
She wasn’t ready to try and get through the pain. When she was
working, her mind was elsewhere.

She walked into the spacious conference and
took a seat in an older, uncomfortable brown chair. Sean had yet to
update the company facilities and it showed. The pictures looked
like something someone picked up at a garage sale, the chairs must
have been twenty years old, and the table had long since lost its
shine. Still, they were conference rooms—they did what they set out
to do.

It turned out that Krista was the only young
person in the upper management circle in her region. She was the
only woman in any of the regions, actually—that had been a shock.
There was a woman manager in France, and another in Australia, but
that was about it. Theoretically, that was awful, but Krista never
really thought or dwelled on it. Or anything, actually. She just
worked. She pushed aside everything else, went as numb as possible,
and worked. End of story.

She put all her materials out, ignored the
other guys sitting there—they were asses for the most part—and
waited for the meeting to start. She didn’t bother saying ‘hello,’
since they’d just ignore her anyway, so she stared out the window
and thought about what she would wear on the plane on Thursday—the
convention was half of Thursday, Friday, Saturday, then back on
Sunday. Through the fog, she heard someone say her name.

Three of the other four managers were sitting
down at the table, all looking at her.

“What’s up?” she asked.

“We were wondering what you thought of the
baseball game?” It was Bob. He was nearly three hundred pounds,
balding, sweaty, and liked to let his beady eyes stray to her
chest. Krista didn’t care about his existence enough to hate the
guy, but she definitely wanted to make him look like a fool.

Currently he was trying to show everyone what
an outcast she was—as if they needed the reminder; she was the only
person under thirty and the only female. Outcast status was a
given—it didn’t need to be pointed out. Still, he thought it his
duty to reinforce the boys’ club.

“Those who can play sports, play sports.
Those who can’t, or don’t, are cheerleaders.” Krista waited a
second to let that sink into his thick head before she continued
with a trite, “What color are your pom-poms?”

In answer, he sneered. He wasn’t all that
witty.

“In answer to your question,” Krista
continued, “I’m glad the Giants mopped the floor with those Dodger
hacks.”

To the collective intake of breath she
smiled.

The San Francisco Giants and the L.A. Dodgers
were rivals. The Giants were currently on a winning streak. Soon
all their good players would be traded elsewhere for more money,
then the winning streak would go to another team, but they were
having a good year. Krista didn’t care at all about baseball, but
she liked to rub it in to the faces of Dodger fans that she was
from Giant’s country. Especially to these particular Dodger
fans.