Chasing Imperfection (Chasing Series 2) (9 page)

   
I do want to know and I don’t. I don’t know how I’d survive sitting
at
this very
table with Sienna for quite some time now without breaking down or doing something drastic.

     She looked shy and discomfited for a second.
“I um…sort of promised to um
,
consider him again.
Trial period and such—but I haven’t given him an answer yet.
” Her words hung in the air as she stared back and forth between Toby and Lucy.

     “Are you sure that’s wise, Sienna? Do you remember the
basis of the very reason you two broke up in the first place?” Toby
asked
with all sincerity.

     “
Don’t
make any hasty decision
s
. But I get where you’re coming from—he is your first love and your best friend. The unbreakable
bond between you two is remarkable
.
Think it through before breaking that barrier again
,
” Luce chimed in.

    
We all don’t want Sienna to be back with Kyle. We all knew and felt this way.
But at the end of the day, it is all up to her.

     I’m elated that she’s not back with him but a bit squashed that she’s even thinking of getting back with him.

    
What happened to
the
“
I’m not going back to a cheater
”
speech she used to say?

6

Sienna

     “I know…”
I said, murmuring
to myself more than anyone else.

    
Contrit
ion
and bitterness latched like a disease while sitting across Blake and
his arm candy. She’s all over him like a rash
. She’s gripping his arms or kissing his neck
and
he looks like he’s enjoying
every ounce of devo
t
ion she’s bestowing
upon
him.

     To make matters worse, she’s freaking stunning. I bet she has endless legs hiding b
ehind the table. They look
flawless together. When did they meet? Is she a girlfriend? I thought they said that Blake was playing the field, surely having a proper girlfriend is not part of the picture?

     Blake doesn’t hide much of his feelings
towards me. His actions and the
way he spoke to me proved that he simply doesn’
t care. Maybe I need to expose myself more with
his treatment of me, so I would be immune to it and it wouldn’t bother me as much. When our eyes met for a brief second, my world stopped spinning. Those eyes took me
in
and swallowed me whole. I know I love him and wished with all my
might that it would go away
, but the more I fight it—the force becomes infuriatingly stronger.

     Luce was ticked off with Ivanna, for reasons I have yet to drill out of her. I glanced o
ver where Kyle was and caught his
eye. He waved back and motioned for me to join them and I smiled. I should leave the table and join Kyle, but I didn’t want to. I like being close to Blake—even with his arm candy stuck to him.

     My phone vibrated in my purse. When I took it out, the caller was
un
familiar. My gut churned.
Shit
, wasn’t this the
hospital
number
? I paled.
Chad!
This call is about Chad.

    
God
, please God. Don’t let anything happen to him. Please….please. He’s such a sweet soul, don’t take him away.

     I prayed as I
lifted
the phone
to
my ear.

     “Hello?” I rushed out of the booth and hastily exited the bar to speak outside.

     “Ms. Richards? This is Dr. Hill, Chad’s doctor
.
” I choked up and tears started to fall from my face. “Please don’t tell me anything bad…don’t do that. Please tell
me
he’s okay,”
I
sniff
ed
in between hiccups. I’m so petrified
at
the thought of losing Chad that I didn’t eve
n realize the people passing
by on the sidewalk were staring
with avid curiosit
y
.

     “Actually, no that’s not the reason I called. We’re calling because we have some good news. You’re friend is awake. He woke up thirty minutes ago.”

    
What?!
Thank heavens!
I knew he’d come through. I just felt it.

     “
This is such a great miracle
! We’re all leaving to go see him now.
Tell him we’ll see him
soon!”
A
bubble
of excitement sprung
out of me. I turned around
wiping the tears from my eyes when I ran into a hard muscled chest. I swallowed and slowly lifted my eyes all the way to his eyes. He looked worried.

     “What’s happened? Why are you crying?” Blake gently wiped my tears with his thumbs. His touch made me weep more. I miss you…my heart pounded with suffering.

     “It’s Chad. He’s awake. We have to go see him right away.”

     After I told Blake that piece of information, he gathered everyone from the booth waved a cab and we all left for the hospital. I saw Blake
ask his driver to take Ivanna back to her apartment with his car. I’m hoping they aren’t serious
with each other
. But the way she kissed his cheek and clung to him when they said their goodbyes broke me. I couldn’t stand seeing him with anyone.

     Not one word passed from our lips during the cab ride. We were happy and petrified at the same time. I rushed out of the cab the second it hit the hospital pavement. I went through the emergency room to get to his room. It
was past midnight and
after
visiting hours.

     I turned around when I heard a long whistle from one of the male hospital staff.
Oh, boo!
I forgot I’m wearing a blasted corset, leather pants
and killer boots.
Men and their libido…it doesn’t even halt in the hospital where t
here are sick and dying people about
.

     “You better keep your opinions to yourself if you want to keep your job
,
” Blake’s angry voice barked behind me.
The male staff
er
mumbled
an
apology and left the area.

    
Damn it
, I love it when he’s all territorial.

     I was about to open Chad’s door when Lucy stopped me. “Sienna—
wait!
Let’s do this together.” Holding each other’s hands, I turned the knob slowly and
we
entered the quiet room.

     “
’
Bout time you guys
got
here! I’ve been waiting for ages!
I think I’ve grown a few white hairs already
,
”
Chad whined with a tired voice. I ran to his bed and hugged the life out of him.

   
“
You ghastly man! You gave us all a fright!”
I
said, clearly relieved and happy.

     Wiping my tears away with the back of my hands, Luce jumped on the bed and gave Chad kisses all over his face. “Don’t you dare—ever do that again! You caused me so many wrinkles my love!”
She
laugh
ed
at her absurdity.

     Blake and Toby sat silently on the foot on the bed. Though we are all relieved, worry
was
still etched in both of their faces. “I’m glad to have you back mate. We’ve all been vigilant and you don’t unders
tand how happy we are that you’ve
recovered
.” Toby smiled at Chad.

     Chad started to tear and I
felt gutted feeling his own misery
. “I’m sorry…I couldn’t take it anymore. I felt trapped and I was
…
drowning rapidly
,
I barely had the chance to take a breath. I’m grateful that I have friends that love and support me.”  He took a deep breath and his lips wobbled before he spoke again.
“It all started when I got a call from my parents a month ago. They heard a rumor that I was gay. I never told them because
they’re
very religious people as I told all of you—but they are on the extreme side. I didn’t even b
other denying the accusation
because it was the tr
uth. And I thought…why not
? There will never be the ‘right time’ to come out of the closet. It was now or never. They both called me names and said I
was a disgrace and wished they gave me away to be adopted had they known they were raising a gay so
n. I was so consumed with sorrow
and grief that
I decided to party
with a few friends that used coke. I took a few hits to m
ake myself feel better. For
the
time being I was numb from feeling and
I
loved it
.” He sniffed and
I
touched his arm.

    
“Sweetie—you don’
t
have
to say anything
right now. Maybe you should rest.”

     He shook his head, “Thanks…but no. I have to get this out. I have to let it out.” I nodded and waited for him to continue.

     “After that first try—I did more for the next few days. They introduced me to gambling and
my
coke consumption accelerated daily. My body started to weaken from lack of sleep and nutrition, but I didn’t care anymore. The night before we met at the pub to catch up, my parents called again. It was a short call…just basically telling me that I was disowned and that they’ll ship all of my things here or they
would
donate it. My mom—we used to be so close and
I felt betrayed that my own mother
can’t even be there for me. The mother I knew became cold and distant—she didn’t sound like my mom. She told me she hated me and never wished to see me again. That call ended me—it ended everything that I believed in. So, I went
out with the same crowd—feeling
like
piece of
shit and
feeling
worthless.
I
decided that night to
consume
a great amount of coke and alcohol
until I pass
ed
out
and never surface
d
again
.”

     Lucy hugged him. “Chad—you should’ve told us. I didn’t have a clue nor did Sienna.
We felt so helpless.
I’m sorry…
”

     We all sobbed quietly together
,
even Toby looked t
eary and Blake mainly looked grie
ve
d
. Our little reunion
was
interrupted when Dr. Hill entered the room. “I see you’ve been catching up with your mates,”
he smiled
at all of us. “We have to run a few more tests and I need Chad to be well rested. You’re all more than welcome to come back tomorrow.”

     We were all hesitant to leave him in the hospital alone—but we had to follow the doctor’s orders. We all took turns saying goodbye. When it was my turn, I held him tightly and kissed his forehead. Looking at Chad’s dark sorrow-filled eyes, “Life has its way of testing our limits and t
his won’t be
the last time it will
try to take you down. But
know
that—when you’re beaten and drowning, we’re all here to help and pull you out of the dark
. That’s what we’re here for. We love you.”
As I kissed
his forehead, Chad smiled brightly at me.

    
“Thanks baby love
.
”

      I gave him a little wave before leaving the room and promised him that we’
ll
all be back tomorrow morning.

    
Hopping in the cab, we were all silent again. I smirked thinking that we tend to be quiet lately when we’re all in a car. Someone’s stomach growled
,
breaking the eerie silence.
Lucy laughed
like she was being tickled. W
e all joined in—her laugh
ter
was contagious.
I caught a glimpse of Blake laughing and I felt my heart convulse with agony. He looked like the Blake
…the old Blake
, happy and amorous.
I think
we all felt
relieved
that our friend
was
out of the wood
s
. I can’t pray enough to say
my
thanks.