Cherished (Wanted) (33 page)

I walked up behind Jeff and put my hand on his shoulder. He didn’t bother to turn around.

“What do you want? Why are you here?” Jeff asked.

His father took a deep breath and slowly let it out. “I know I’m probably the last person you want to see, but I wanted to talk to you and Ellie. Your mother—”

“She’s moved on and has finally gotten over you. She’s getting married, and I seriously doubt she wants to see you.”

The sadness in Jeff’s father’s eyes almost made me feel sorry for him.

He nodded his head. “Your mother was my first love, Jefferson. I loved her with all my heart, and I still do.”

“Did you let Angie know how much you loved Mom while you fucked her behind Mom’s back?”

“Jeff,” I whispered.

His dad looked down. “It’s just…we had you when we were so young, and I was so scared. I felt like I had so much more in life to do, and I felt…trapped. Angie was my only way out. I never loved her like I loved your mother.”

Jeff let out a gruff laugh. “You sure have a funny way of showing your love.”

Just then, Luke came running out. “Daddy!” he screamed as he ran and grabbed on to Jeff’s leg.

The look on Jeff’s father’s face when he saw Luke made me so sad. I silently thanked God for my parents and their unconditional love.

“Your son?” Jeff’s dad said as his voice cracked.

Jeff turned and looked at me. I could see the confusion in his eyes.

He slowly turned back to his father. “Yes. I also have a daughter.”

Shit! Grace!
I spun around and ran back into the kitchen.

As soon as I saw her, I busted out laughing. She had cereal everywhere, and she gave me the biggest smile ever.

I walked over to her and smiled down at her. “If I didn’t love you so much…”

I began cleaning her up as I heard Jeff talking to his father in the living room.

He needs to leave—like right now!

“Jeff, I need your help in here… now, please,” I called out.

Jeff came walking into the kitchen, holding Luke in his arms, and he just looked at me. “What in the fuck?” he said.

I knew it wasn’t because Grace was covered in baby food.

“I know, but listen, your mom is going to be here any minute. You need to get him out of here, Jeff—like now!”

Then, the doorbell rang.

Jeff closed his eyes. “Fuck. Me.” He turned and walked out of the kitchen.

I moved with lightning speed to clean up Grace. I heard Jeff telling his dad that he shouldn’t have just shown up like this. Then, I heard Jeff opening the front door. I grabbed Grace and practically ran out into the hallway to the front door.

I stopped in my tracks when I saw Sharon, Ellie, and Alex. “Oh no,” I whispered.
We’re about to have a little family reunion.

“Um…Mom, Ells…can I talk to you outside?” Jeff asked.

I glanced over to his father sitting on the sofa. I couldn’t help but notice how sad he was.
Serves his ass right for what he did to all three of them.

“Why? What’s wrong?” Ellie asked.

Ellie could always tell when Jeff was upset or worried. Nothing got by her as far as he was concerned.

“Ells…let’s just…”

Sharon looked at him as she tilted her head. “Jeff, what’s going on? Your face is white as a ghost.” She peeked over Jeff’s shoulder and saw me standing there. She smiled when she saw Grace kicking and holding her arms out for her. She pushed Jeff out of the way and started to walk in.

“Mom…really, I think it’s best if we step outside for a minute.”

“Nonsense. I want to see my grandchildren and…” Her voice trailed off as she looked into the living room. “Brian? Is everything alright?” she asked in a whispered voice.

“Sharon, I’m so sorry. I had no idea you would be here,” Brian said as he slowly stood and started wringing his hands together.

Ellie came barreling in and stopped right behind Sharon. She stood there and just stared at her father. He smiled when he saw her, and when he looked down at Alex, he smiled bigger.

“Why are you here? How dare you come back into our lives! Haven’t you caused us all enough trouble? You need to go…right now!” Ellie shouted, scaring both Grace and Alex.

Sharon turned around and shook her head. She took a crying Alex out of Ellie’s arms. “Shh…baby girl, it’s okay. Ellie, please, honey, calm down.”

Jeff walked in and set Luke down.

He immediately ran up to Sharon. “Alwex! Alwex!”

Sharon put Alex down, and Alex and Luke both hugged each other. I quickly looked up at Brian, who seemed to have tears in his eyes. I glanced over to Jeff, and he looked more confused than angry.

“Luke, Alex…come on, y’all. Let’s go into Luke’s room and play!” I said, trying to be all cheery and shit.

Luke and Alex took off for the playroom, and I followed behind them. As I looked back, I saw Sharon turn toward Jeff and Ellie.

“Kids, your father and I need to tell you something.”

Holy shit. Sharon wasn’t at all surprised to see Jeff’s dad. Shit! Why can’t it be nap time?

I stood there and just stared at my mother.
Why is she not surprised to see my father?

I glanced over at him, and he looked exactly like I remembered…but older…and sadder. His eyes were filled with sadness.

Good, I hope his life has been miserable—that bastard!

“Mom…why are you not surprised to see him?” Jeff asked.

My mother walked over and stood next to our father.

Oh god…she’s not leaving Philip for our father, is she?

“Ellie, sweetheart, calm the thoughts in your head. I see you thinking a mile a minute.”

I shook my head. “Mom…are you leaving Philip for…for him?” I pointed to the man standing in front of me.

I didn’t even want to call him my father. It was his fault that my mother had treated us so badly all those years. He had been the reason for her sadness and bitterness.

“What? No! My god, no, Ellie. Jeff…Ellie, baby…please sit down,” my mother said with a weak smile. She turned and looked at my father. “You couldn’t wait for a few days longer until I talked to them?” she asked in a soft…almost caring voice.

He shook his head as he sat down. My mother took a seat next to him.

“Okay…can I just say that this is fucking weird?” Jefferson said as we both sat down.

They both gave us a slight smile, and then I almost fell out of my chair when my mother reached for my father’s hand.

I stood up quickly. “What is going on?” I practically shouted.

Jefferson reached up and pulled me back down. “Calm down, Ells…let Mom talk.”

My head was spinning.
This is not happening. Are they friends now? Did he get in touch with her? Or did she get in touch with him?

“About three months ago, your father contacted me. I agreed to meet him—with Philip.”

I felt sick to my stomach. I put my hand on my swollen stomach, and right at that moment, the baby moved. I’d felt her move this morning, and I thought Gunner would have come out of his skin because he’d wanted to feel it so bad.

“Mom, why would you open up that hurt again?” Jefferson asked.

I watched as my father looked down and then up at my mom. She looked at him and smiled.

“Jefferson, Ellie, I will always love your father. He was my first love. He was probably the love of my life.”

My father reached up and wiped a tear away from his cheek. My heart jumped a beat, and I grabbed Jefferson’s hand.

“But I am also deeply in love with Philip, and I plan on spending the rest of my life with him. He gives me unconditional love, and I can’t imagine my life without him.”

I was finally able to open my mouth and say something. “Are you still with Angie?”

My father snapped his eyes up at me, and the moment his blue eyes caught mine, I wanted to cry. I remembered those eyes looking into mine while he’d told me stories. I used to dream I would marry someone like him.

“No. We divorced a few years ago. She left me and said she couldn’t live in the shadow of another woman.”

I shook my head, the anger building. “What in the hell does that mean?”

He took a deep breath and let it out slowly. “Ellie…your mother was my first love. She’s probably the only woman I’ve ever truly loved in my life.”

I went to say something, but Jefferson squeezed my hand.

“I had all these plans for us…and when we went to college, I sort of freaked out. I was leaving town for games, and all I could do was think about her. What was she doing? Who was she with? Did she miss me? My mind was consumed with thoughts of your mother.”

I began shaking. “Why did you cheat on her then?” I spat out with as much hate as I could.

My mother looked down and away.

Oh god…hearing him say this must be tearing her apart inside!

“I wish I could answer that, but there really is no answer. I was scared…scared of the feelings I had for her. A part of me wanted to push her away, so I wouldn’t have to worry about anything. I just wanted to worry about football and taking over my father’s business. The other part of me wanted her so much that I could hardly stand it.”

He looked over at my mom, who just gave him a weak smile.

“One day, your mother saw me kissing Angie at a game. I ran after your mom, and I promised myself that I would never see that look in her eyes again. I would never hurt her again.”

“But you didn’t keep that promise,” I said, my voice cracking.

My mother gave me a weak smile.

“Mom…are you okay?” I asked.

She smiled bigger as she tilted her head and slowly shook it. “Ellie, darling, your heart is so pure and sweet. Yes, sweetheart, I’m okay. Your father and I have been talking during the last few months about a lot of things. I think I have come to a place where I am able to forgive him. I needed this to happen, so I could have closure and move on with my life. So do you kids.”

I sat there, stunned. “Why didn’t you tell us you were talking to him?” I looked at my father. “Why didn’t you try to contact us? Why did you leave when we all needed you?” I finally lost it and broke down, crying.

Jefferson took me in his arms and held me while I cried uncontrollably from all the emotions surfacing all at once. The next thing I knew, I felt a hand on my knee. I pulled my face away from Jefferson to see my father kneeling down on the floor with tears streaming down his face. One quick look at my mother revealed that she was also crying.

“I’m so sorry, pumpkin eater,” he whispered.

“What did you call me?” I asked in a whispered voice.

“Pumpkin eater—it’s what I called you the first time I ever saw you.” He smiled.

I slowly shook my head. “But you didn’t want me. I was a mistake.”

His mouth dropped open, and he pulled back slightly. “Don’t ever say that Ellie.
Ever.
I did want you. I loved you and still do. I love you very much. You did nothing wrong.”

He looked up at Jefferson. “And neither did you, son. This is entirely my fault. All the pain and hurt I’d put the three of you through was all my fault. I have no excuse for what I did. I walked away from three of the most important people of my life because I was a scared, selfish bastard. I wanted that free life of partying and traveling that I didn’t get to have. If I had a wife and family, I couldn’t do that.” He dropped his head and began sobbing. “I was a stupid fool, such a stupid fool.”

I slowly looked at my mother, who was wiping away her tears. I was so confused, and my head was spinning.

“Why Angie though? You kissed her before you even knew Mom was pregnant with Jeff.” I said.

He looked up at me, and his eyes caught mine. “Because I was an asshole, Ellie. I don’t have any other reason than that. I was a cheating bastard. I loved your mother more than anything, but there was a side of me that just wanted to…I don’t know.” He shook his head. “Angie gave me attention like I’d never had before, and I…I liked it.”

I peeked over at my mother as she sat there so calmly while she dabbed her eyes. She’d come so far, and I just prayed that this wouldn’t have a negative effect on her.

“Were you happy with Angie?” I asked.

He looked away and then back into my eyes. “No.”

“Why didn’t you come back to us then?” I asked as the anger continued building inside me.

“I tried a few times. I’d go and visit your mom, and I would just end up…well, I would—”

“You’d fuck her and leave,” Jefferson said.

“Jefferson Johnson!” my mother said.

Jefferson looked at Mom. “Sorry, Mom. It just…it makes me so angry. Dad, you have no idea how angry I am.”

My father put his hand on Jefferson’s knee and nodded his head. “Yes, I do. I do know how angry you are because I’ve been angry for the last twenty-something years. I’m angry at myself, at Angie, at my father, who encouraged me to leave your mother.”

I sucked in a breath of air. “What?
Why
?”

He took a deep breath and let it out very slowly. “Your grandfather didn’t like your mom very much.”

He looked over and winked at her, and she smiled.

“He always thought I should have married someone who came from money. He threatened me when he found out that your mother was pregnant with you, Ellie. He told me he was going to take everything away from me. He was going to disown me for getting her pregnant again. He said I’d never run the family business. My mother though…she loved Sharon and you kids, and it broke her heart when I left. My father wouldn’t allow her to talk or even see Sharon or you two.”