Closing Costs (14 page)

"Ah, no actually. Moving back and joining a practice."

Jack narrowed his eyes but slapped him on the shoulder. "Of course you are. Can't keep things simple around here too long can we?" The two men smiled at each other and walked towards Sara and her parents still standing up on the patio.

Chapter Seventeen

After a couple of hours, Sara thought her head would explode from noise and stress. She and Julie had planned it all out, but the actual implementation took a ton of energy.

"So, he's quite the success isn't he?" Her father walked up to her as she took a breather from the kids.

"Who?"

Matthew pointed over to Craig, who stood admiring Julie's twin girls.

"Sure. I guess."

"Would be quite a catch I'd say."

Sara turned to her mother. "Keep him away from me or I'm gonna kick him out."

Blake walked up holding a plateful of food. "How in the hell did all that get eaten? My God we brought enough food to feed an adult army battalion." She glanced at him then dashed over to defuse some kind of seven-year-old ruckus near the water balloons.

"Please, the next time anyone suggests 'water balloons' and 'birthday party' in the same sentence, shoot them." She tossed over her shoulder.

She saw Jack emerge from the bouncy castle, a little green around the gills. The few parents who hadn't stuck around for the free food and booze started showing up, took one look at the chaos and started eyeballing Sara as if she were an evil stepmother, at best.

Katie sat nestled in a group of her soccer and school friends ripping paper from gifts without even noticing what they were. Sara caught Jack's eye over the heads of the crowd hoping like hell he got the message to shut the thing down, now. He did. Plucking Katie up and perching her on his shoulders he let a few kids latch onto his legs and he walked the whole crowd over the patio like a tall, handsome Pied Piper. Sara smiled and turned to some mom who'd just appeared at her elbow, bitching about "gluten-free cake" and "tree nut allergies."

It took a grand total of twenty minutes to divest her backyard of thirty-eight small, over-stimulated kids, leaving her to collapse into a chair. Just in time to catch her father and Jack arguing. "A little over the top wouldn't you say Gordon? The girl is only seven after all."

Katie had climbed up into Jack's lap and fallen asleep, draped over his shoulder. He kept a hand on her back; the other gripped a glass of bourbon. Sara shot him a look from behind her father's chair, with what she hoped was a clear,
"Don't engage. It's not worth it,"
message.

He grinned and winked at her. "Yeah, maybe. But a damn good time. Glad you could make it Matt." Sara blew him a kiss and let her eyes linger on his.

Julie's question ghosted through her brain. She'd confided in her friend last week. Told her she'd been determined to win him back. To convince him she was serious about them as a couple, the three of them as a family. Julie had made a fairly radical suggestion. Sara gulped, thinking of the small package she had hidden in her bedside table for later. But the surprise arrival of Craig had thrown her off. Just as she was thinking of him, he put an arm around her waist and kissed her cheek.

She smiled and turned to him. "You look great. I like this," she ran her finger down his jaw. "Sexy and rugged. Congrats on the ER thing, really."

"I always planned to come back here. I hadn't figured out how but…" he shrugged and took a drink of his beer. They stood, watching Blake and Rob relax together in her hammock. "Those two okay?"

She leaned into him. "Yeah, thank God. They're even talking about adopting, but Blake doesn't want to." Sara relished Craig's way of putting her at ease no matter what.

"Really, I'd think he would be the one advocating for it. He's always been so great with Katie."

"Yeah, he wants a biological child using a surrogate."

"Ah. Complicated."

"Yeah, it's brought out some ugliness. But, in an even more bizarre twist, Rob told me he thought they should take it even one more step. Find a woman to share their lives."

"I understand you can get those on the internet." His voice was serious. She looked up at his twinkling brown eyes and her heart did a little dance in her chest.

She punched his shoulder. "Be nice."

He laughed and pulled her into an embrace. "It's so good to see you. To see her. She's amazing. You've….you and Jack…have done a great job."

Sara sucked in a deep breath, keeping her nose buried in his shirtfront. "Thanks. But it's likely more him than me."

She looked up at him, keeping her hands clasped behind his waist. The eyes of the patio were on them, she knew but she didn't care. He touched her cheek.

"I asked Suzanne to marry me today." Sara started, released him and ran her hand up her suddenly chilled arm.

"Oh. Well, double congratulations."

She tried to force down the irrational jealousy that poked her consciousness.
You let him go Sara. Can't blame him for moving on
. But with Suzanne? She closed her eyes.

"She said no." Her eyes flew open. She tried to gauge his state of mind but his face stayed neutral. "Told me I had to get you out of my system first. Said she wouldn't play understudy." He sighed and Sara realized how tired he looked. She put a hand on his arm.

"I've managed to screw up your life, haven't I?" Rob and Blake interrupted before he had a chance to respond, walking up and taking over the conversation with Craig. "Excuse me," she stepped back, "I need to…" she let the words fade as she escaped, already questioning her decision about tonight.

Chapter Eighteen

"Dear God I feel like I've been beaten up by a biker gang." Jack groaned from the living room. All the guests had finally dispersed, and Katie was passed out in her bed. Sara puttered around in the kitchen, nervous energy making her heart fluttery. Visions of Craig, images of his face when he saw how Katie had changed and seemed to be morphing into a blend of him and her, and his words, "She said no," clanged around in her brain.

"Yo, bring me some alcohol, quick." His deep voice seared her nerve endings. She poured them each a glass of wine, pictured the small flat box she had tucked into the side table drawer. It calmed her. The long conversations she'd had with Julie, about that woman's decision to bind herself to Evan this way first, before they married, had made a huge impact. Sara hoped she could convince Jack she meant this. They had an awful lot of bullshit behind them.

Her living room was her oasis. Clean, neutral walls, mostly cream and brown furnishings; she'd discovered that sitting there soothed her with its simplicity. Jack sat on her soft white rug, legs sprawled out, head leaning back on the couch seat. He still managed to be breathtaking, even with a sprinkling of grey in his thick hair.

She joined him, clinked glasses.

"Nice party, Sara. Well done."

"You'd think it would be easy to impress a bunch of seven-year-olds. I assure you it is not." She laughed and sipped, keeping her eyes averted, still wondering if this whole scenario she'd set up would be a huge mistake.

He kept an arm draped around her shoulder, traced circles on her bare shoulder with a finger while he sipped. "Good to see Craig. Seems he's gonna be a more permanent fixture around here…again."

"Yeah." She wondered how her life could get so complicated just as she'd finally decided what she wanted.
Jack.
She had to do it before she backed out. Jaw set, she stood.

"Where ya going baby?" He tugged her back down, pressed her back onto the thick rug. She looked up at him. He had his arms on either side of her and leaned down, brushing his lips against hers. "Stay." He whispered.

"Okay but I have," he cut her off with a kiss so fierce, so intense she moaned. His tongue swept into her mouth, lips firm against hers. He intoxicated her and brought her release all at once. She put her feet on the floor, needing to feel something solid, something to assure herself she hadn't floated away on a cloud of desire from the mere touch of his mouth on hers. She broke away.

"Wow. What was that for? Not that I'm complaining."

He grinned, making his eyes sparkle, in turn making her core begin its usual meltdown around him. He ran a finger down her face. The look in his eyes alarmed her – it contained regret, and very little hope.

She propped up on her elbows. "What? Really, Jack, why did you do that? We haven't touched each other in nearly two years. Why now?"

"Because you needed it."

She made a frustrated sound and looked away from him. He pushed her back onto the rug again, in one swift movement had her hands pinned over her head. She struggled against him. "Fuck you, Jack. Let me go." Her earlier resolve seemed to have vanished. Confusion flooded her brain. But her body thrummed, recognizing and loving his power over her. "Okay. If you insist." He possessed her mouth once more, ran a hand down her breast, flicked her nipple while keeping her wrists still under his grasp. She shifted, wrapped a leg around his waist. His need pressed against her body and she arched into it, her world once again a swirl of dark emotion – a darkness she let herself own, gladly and willingly.

The hand slipped inside her shorts, reached her sex, pressed against it. Sara sighed. "You take orders very well," she whispered into his neck as her long-neglected body fielded its first true release since…well, since the last time she'd been with him. He pressed fingers high into her, making her bite down on a squeal of pleasure. "May I? Please?"

He stopped, still as a stone, lips hovering over hers. His tongue flicked out, touched her lips. "Yes." The one simple word, whispered deep in his throat, made her ears go quiet, shut out all sensation but his lips and fingers. Her whole body seemed to lift up and off the floor. Tears stung her eyes as her heart filled with a pure bright sensation and her hands and feet went numb. "That's it baby. Give it to me. All of it. " He kept up the monologue, anchoring her as his fingers stoked her G-spot over and over making her quiver, moan, want more.

"Give me your heart Sara, please," he nuzzled her neck. "I'll take care of it for you I promise." She gasped, groaned when he released her wrists and threaded his long fingers through hers. "I love you." He tugged her shorts down and off, released his cock and lunged up between her legs, entering her body and soul with one long thrust.

Wrapping both legs around his waist she held him still, looked in his eyes as he moved his hips, reaching up high. She tightened all her muscles. "Kiss me."

He did, using his tongue and cock to fill her, give her what she needed, until he tilted his hips, grunted and filled her, leaving them both gasping for breath and spent. She sighed, stretched beneath him, traced his lips with her tongue. "You'll take care of my heart, eh?" He groaned, slipped out of her and collapsed on the rug.

"I will. Although I guess you can call me the goddamned fifteen-second man, sorry. Jesus." He ran a shaking hand over his face. She grinned and went up on an elbow. "You know how to make a man pent up."

"I didn't do that. You did. You cannot tell me there isn't a line of women at your door willing to take your edge off." She stood, tugged her shorts back on and grabbed her wine. "Whatever, I'm kidding. I have something for you actually. In my room. Give me a sec." She strode down the back hallway, pulled the large, flat velvet box from the drawer and arranged herself on the bed. Unsure how exactly to present it, she sat up on her knees, box in front of her, hands folded and eyes cast down.

She heard him get a drink of water, then wander back. The gasp when she opened the box sounded serious. He took the few steps to her bed and shut it, fast, tossing it to the floor.

"No, Sara, you don't have to." He kissed her, hard. When he released he plucked the box from the floor, opened it and pulled the thin platinum choker from it, turning it in his hands. She swallowed hard.

"I thought, I mean... I wanted to make a statement you know, about how I feel."

"I know. I get it. I did the same thing about eight years ago, at a large sales meeting?" She looked away. "But this, while appreciated, is simply not necessary. I don't want you this way."

She stood, anger quickly replacing nervousness. "How exactly do you want me?"

"As an equal. I don't want there to be any confusion whatsoever about that."

"But... this isn't about equality, right? It's about trust. I'm trying to tell you Jack, I trust you. Trust you enough to wear this so the whole world knows." A whimper from upstairs made them both look up. Sara sighed as he kissed her nose.

"It's too much, too soon. Kinda like that first time I proposed, okay? We need to get our heads around all of this. You and me both." He made for the door now that the sounds materialized into a coherent cry for Uncle Jack.

"But…" she followed him out and stood at the steps, listening as he soothed, got her a drink of water and shut the door behind him. He took a seat on the bottom stair, tugged her down alongside him.

"You are not ready for that. Trust me. I wasn't ready for marriage then – you figured it out and saved us most likely an expensive divorce." She started to protest but he put a finger over her mouth. "I've done a shitload of soul searching on this. As hard as it is for me to admit, and as much as I love you, we still need time." She watched, incredulous, as the man, who'd begged her to marry him repeatedly, started for the front door after she'd offered him what she thought was something even deeper.

The door shut and she was alone. She sat, trying to process it, trying to will away the kneejerk reaction that resembled anger. He had a point. She turned his words over in her head; tried to find solace in some of it. Hope in others. She wanted nothing more than a life with him and was finally ready to admit it. She thought she'd done the right thing. But he'd…he'd rejected her.

She gasped and covered her mouth. It overtook her. Now, she knew how he felt all those time he'd asked her to marry him and she'd blown him off, casual and breezy.