Cocktails & Dreams (19 page)

“Care to join me, Ms. Baker?”

Jena smiled. “Not this time. Let the water concentrate where the tension is the worst, and I’ll be waiting for you in your bedroom when you’re finished.”

He nodded, already unbuttoning his jeans as he walked down the hall. Jena took a deep breath and puffed it out. “Nicholas needs sleep,” she mumbled to herself over and over, trying to get control over the little hormone women that were screeching and dancing deep within her body. Grabbing a beer out of the fridge, Jena chugged it down, hoping to anesthetize them and get them caged before Nicholas walked out of the bathroom, all warm and wet and male.

She heard the shower shut off and quickly turned to search the cupboards for a relaxing tea. And to hide her flushed face.

“Problem?”

Jena glanced behind her and saw Nicholas standing in the doorway, hips draped in a towel, water droplets glistening in his chest hair and hair mussed and damp. She turned around quickly and remembered to breathe.

“Just looking for tea.” Jena’s voice sounded strangled, even to her.

“Sorry. A little too estrogen for this testosterone casa.”

Jena looked around in time to catch his grin. “That’s okay. Just go on in and lie on your stomach and I’ll be right in.” Nicholas walked down the hall, and Jena heard his soft sigh as he lay down. “Do you guys have any baby oil or massage oil or anything like that?” she called.

“Conor might have some in his room, if you dare to brave whatever else you might find in there.”

“Nope. Not that brave,” Jena declared, and they laughed together as she walked into the bedroom and sat at the foot of the bed. She started massaging Nicholas’s feet and moved slowly up his legs, carefully blanking out everything but the individual muscles that relaxed under her practiced touch. When Jena got to his thighs, he groaned softly, and Jena started to move back.

“Don’t stop,” Nicholas murmured, eyes closed. “That feels…really nice.”

She hesitated, finally placing her hands on the small of his back and stroking firmly upward with her thumbs at each side of his spine until she couldn’t reach any further comfortably, even when she knelt next to him. “Nick, do you mind if I change? I’ll just borrow a shirt, if that’s all right. I can’t stretch enough in these jeans.”

His eyes were still closed. “Mmm-hmm.”

She slid off the bed and exchanged her jeans and shirt for a soft tee. Returning to the bed, she hesitated again before straddling his hips. “I can’t reach from the sides of the bed,” she explained. Nicholas nodded slowly, and Jena resumed stroking and rubbing his back, feeling his tension melt away as the minutes passed and he relaxed.

“So, what are you stressing about?” she asked softly, moving up to sit on the small of his back in order to reach his shoulders. It was getting harder and harder to block out the fact that this was Nicholas Cooper, the man she’d wanted since she was eighteen years old. Jena started to reconsider the decision to straddle Nick’s back as his warmth began to seep through her underwear.

“Hospital,” he mumbled. “Parents.” He paused. “The rocket scientist.”

Jena stopped moving, surprised. “You’re not seriously worrying about him?” Nick shrugged, and his shoulders started to tighten up again. She dropped a kiss on the back of his neck, and he shivered. “Don’t. Ever.” She started to massage his head, sliding her fingers through his hair and along his scalp.

Nicholas moaned deep in his throat. “I need to roll over. This is getting uncomfortable,” he murmured.

Jena swung her leg over and knelt beside him as he settled on his back. “Crap, I’m sorry.”

Nicholas caught her hands and brought them to his chest. “It’s not you, Jena. It’s me. And I’m not sorry at all.” Jena swiftly glanced down and laughed. Nicholas closed his eyes again, smiling. “Continue, please.”

Jena looked at his resting face and decided to start there, gently stroking the planes of his cheeks and continuing down to his neck and shoulders. “Jena…” Nicholas whispered as her thumbs trailed lightly over his shoulders. The smell and feel of his warm body was driving her crazy, and soon she was following every touch of her hands with a kiss or a nuzzle or a lap of her tongue. Nick gripped Jena’s shoulders as she started to tug at the tucked edge of towel that was still wrapped around his hips.

“Wait.” Jena looked up. “You don’t have to do this,” he said, breathing shallowly.

“I want to,” she whispered.

When he was satisfied, Jena scooted up to lie beside him. Nicholas flung a heavy, relaxed arm around her hips, resting his head on her stomach and breathing raggedly. She stroked his hair and within minutes, he was almost asleep.

“I’m sorry, sweetheart,” he mumbled through a yawn. “You didn’t get much out of that.”

“What, are we ten? We need fair turnsies?” she joked.

Nick smiled sleepily, looking up at her through half-closed eyes. Jena smoothed the hair back from his forehead, and he stretched his neck so she could drop a kiss on his mouth. “Sometimes it’s gonna be all about just one of us. This just happened to be your turn, so go to sleep.”

His eyes drifted closed again. “Yes, ma’am.” Nicholas settled his head more comfortably on Jena, and curved his body around hers.

Jena felt her own eyes closing, so it wasn’t a surprise that she almost missed Nick’s murmured “…love you…”

A
S
S
OON
A
S
T
HE
W
ORDS
left his mouth, Nicholas knew they were true.

And it scared him to death.

He froze, waiting for Jena’s reply, and then realized that her soothing hand had stopped moving in his hair. Raising his head slightly, he looked up to see her lashes resting on her cheek and lips slightly upturned as her stomach moved evenly in sleep.

Thank God
, his brain muttered.
You dodged a bullet, big time.

He slowly settled his head back on Jena’s body, wrapping his arm more tightly around her waist. What was he supposed to do? How did he get from thinking this was definitely the hottest, funniest girl he had ever met to wanting her to never leave his sight? If he was anywhere near Jena, he had to be touching her, and when she wasn’t with him, he craved her.

Nick scooted up to lay his head on the pillow, pulling her back against his chest and tangling his legs with hers. Burying his face in her hair, he wrapped his arm around her waist and slid his hand under the shirt she was wearing.

“…feel you…” Jena muttered, blearily opening her eyes before yanking the shirt over her head and dropping it to the mattress beside her. She snuggled into Nick’s body, drawing his hand up and holding it against her chest. Her deep, even breathing resumed.

Nicholas closed his eyes, willing sleep. He’d been almost there before he fucked up and scared himself to death by saying those words. He could only remember telling someone he loved them a handful of times, and most of those were said to his dog when he was a kid. He always knew his parents loved him, and he assumed they knew he loved them, so there hadn’t been reason to discuss it. In fact, he got the distinct impression that saying it would have made everyone uncomfortable.

Jena, though…she drew the words out of him, and not just because she’d been incredibly generous that night. It was everything about her, all the time. As he absorbed her warmth, Nicholas felt himself begin to relax again.

The week had been a bitch. Between the non-stop sucking up of the students and being treated like an idiot in a white coat by both residents and nurses, Nick was ready to rip someone a new one. He had seen and treated a lot of accidents and injuries firsthand during his time as an EMT, and being regarded as one amongst the newbies drove him nuts.

Then, in an unprecedented event, his father had shocked him with a phone call to see how Nick’s rotation was going. After a chuckle over his son’s disgusting and funny week in Peds rotation and a discussion of how he could make the best use of his time there, Nicholas expected his dad to quickly hang up. He didn’t. He rambled on about their trip back to Boston, and that was weird, because Dr. William Cooper was far too busy to ramble. Finally, William got to the point and asked if Nicholas was finding time to see Jena. The conversation got tense at that point, Nicholas questioning his father’s problem with Jena, and William denying there was one. They had hung up after strained goodbyes.

Now Nick had to deal with the rocket scientist trying to move in. And
he
could see Jena every day, if he wanted to. Take her to lunch. Visit her at work. Have time to spend with her in the evening, maybe?

Jena shifted as his arm tightened around her, and he forced himself to relax. Jena’s openness about what had happened was enough for him to realize that she wasn’t interested in Stefan, but it still didn’t make it any easier to hear that the fucktard refused to acknowledge that she was
taken.
Remaining calm and supportive when she’d sounded so tired and upset hadn’t been easy, but Nick had managed it…until she hung up and he destroyed the crap on the coffee table. Conor was pretty pissed when he found his favorite remote in the garbage, even when Nicholas came back from Target with a new, top-of-the-line universal. That was cheap compared to the phone Nick replaced at the same time.

Seeing Jena at that table in Stevie’s that night had been like oxygen, as corny and cliché as it sounded. The only thing getting him through each day all week had been the anticipation, the all-involving craving, to hear her voice before he went to sleep. Every night, Nicholas fought the desire to ask Jena to just be there when he got home so he could feel her next to him, and have conversations about nothing, and fall asleep tangled in her arms. He just didn’t know how to say it without sounding like either a complete horndog tool or a clingy dishmop.

Now here he was, ashamed of himself for feeling relieved that Jena didn’t hear him say aloud what she’d said a hundred times without words. Her every touch had been a small
I love you
for weeks, and Nick damned well knew it. He’d seen the question in her eyes and heard it underneath her words, but she’d seemed content to leave things as they were for now. Waiting for him. Not pushing.

He felt like such an ass.

Jena rolled over in his arms, entwining her legs with his as she slid an arm around his waist and kissed his chest.

Another
I love you
.

The magic of her warm softness wrapped around him made him drowsy. His eyes drifted closed as he laid his cheek against her hair, promising himself to be braver in the morning.

A quiet rap woke Nicholas, and he opened one eye.

“Sorry to wake you up, man,” Con whispered, his face softening into a smile as he glanced at Jena. Sometime in the night, she had rolled onto her stomach, though a hand still rested on Nick’s chest, and her hair was trailing over them both and covering her face. “It’s one o’clock, and I’m heading to the station. I didn’t know if either one of you had to work today.”

Nicholas shook his head, and Jena’s voice emerged from the depths of her hair. “Thanks, Conor. Thanks a lot. I was having the best dream, and you were in it.”

Conor chuckled. “Sex object?”

“Giant monkey playing the banjo, actually. Coffee?”

“Comin’ right up, cutie. What about you, Dr. Doofus?”

Nick grunted. “She gets an endearment and I get an insult. Tell me where that’s fair. And yes, I want coffee.”

“She has a nicer ass than you do.” Conor broke into laughter as Jena swiped her hand behind her, making sure the blankets were pulled up. “Gotcha, Jen. Coffee will be on the counter, you crazy kids.” After a couple of minutes, Nicholas heard the outer door shut quietly.

Jena rolled onto her side, and Nick brushed her hair back. A sleepy smile spread across her face, and she pressed her cheek into Nick’s hand. “Hi,” she whispered.

Nicholas smiled back. “Hi.”

Jena delicately touched the area under his eyes with her fingertips. “You look better. Rested.”

“Must have been how I fell asleep.” Nicholas waggled his eyebrows at her.

Jena smiled. “More like fourteen hours of sleep, I think.” She rolled over and stretched, arching her back and extending her neck. “I didn’t realize I was so tired. Damn!”

Nicholas couldn’t resist running his hand lightly over the top of her chest, sliding it down until he could feel her heart beat. He laughed as it stuttered and then started galloping.

“Oh, you think that’s funny, Dr. Sexypants? That you make me crazy basically doing nothing?” Small fingers were suddenly digging into Nick’s ribs, and he chuckled.

“Not ticklish there.” He raised his arm. “Here either. Go ahead. Try it.”

“Nice, Nicholas. Armpit in my face.” Jena pretended to gag, and suddenly her fingers were at the top of his thigh. His sharp gasp of laughter encouraged her, and she kept tickling as he tried to catch her wrist. “How do you like that, huh?” she growled, plunging her other hand below the covers to grab his other thigh, but missing his leg. “Oops. Sorry.” She giggled.

Nicholas grabbed Jena’s hand and held it against himself. “Don’t be. I kind of like that.”

“Perv.” They wrestled for a minute, and Jena ended up on top of Nick. The soft chuffs of air coming from her mouth hit the area behind his ear and gave him goose bumps.

“Now
I
found a spot, didn’t I?” Jena crowed. She gently blew over the spot again and then brushed her lips on the sensitive skin as he squirmed. “Do you like that, Nicholas?” she breathed, drawing his earlobe into her mouth with her lips and then sliding it out between her teeth before flicking her tongue in the hollow below his ear.

“No. I hate it. Do it again.” He ran his hands over Jena’s ribs and settled them on her hips, rubbing restlessly in circles as she complied. “That’s nice.”

Jena reached back quickly to tickle his thigh again.

Squawking, Nicholas tried to reach her hand, but the way Jena was sitting on his pelvis made it impossible for him to lean up enough to reach her ruthless hand. The double tension from laughing and feeling her grinding against him as she twisted to get a better angle had ramped up the coil of need in his belly to a dangerous extent. “Jesus, Jena,” he gasped out, “stop! I swear to God, you’ll be sorry. And messy.”

She laughed, resting her hands on his chest and leaning forward to kiss him on the nose. “All right, I suppose I can stop.” She moved until she could lie next to him and rest her head on his chest. “I love you too much to make you change your sheets on your only day to rest, I guess.” She smoothed her fingers over his skin, smiling up at him.

Nick’s heart thumped in his chest. She said it. Out loud, while looking straight at him. Oh, fuck. Was she still joking? “You do, huh?” He kept his tone light as he watched her hands.

“Yep.”

This would be the time to say it again, Nick’s brain whispered…and he couldn’t get the words out, no matter how hard he tried. Jena didn’t seem to notice his struggle, thankfully.

She deserved better than his silence.

“Jena, I—” The words caught in his throat. “You have today off, right? Want to go to the movies or veg on the couch?”

Fuck. Epic fail.

Jena laughed in delight, sitting up and grinning down at him. “You read my mind. Couch, definitely. Let’s take care of breakfast first, though.”

Two weeks later, Nick was regretting his decision not to just ask Jena to pack a bag, grab her books, and stay with him for…ever. Each day started to blend into the others as the residents and lectors intensified their lessons, trying to make sure the med students learned enough in the rotation to avoid killing their small patients. Nicholas dragged home from each shift, sure that it couldn’t possibly get any tougher, but it did. An eight-hour shift was supposed to be the norm, but by the time he finished working his own charts and the charts handed down to him by his sadistic resident, Nick rarely got out of the hospital in less than ten or eleven hours. He went home, studied, talked to Jena on the phone, and dropped into bed, only to do the same thing the next day.

Finally, even getting up became a heroic struggle. On the morning Nicholas staggered to the bathroom and slept through his shower, only reviving when Conor silently handed him a mug of coffee as he shuffled into the kitchen, Conor finally spoke up.

“You all right, Nick?” He leaned a hip against the counter and crossed his arms, watching Nicholas swallow his second cup of coffee in as many minutes.

Nick nodded, grimacing as the hot liquid scalded his throat. “Med school, man. Had to expect it.”

Conor looked steadily at him. “You’re not sleeping much either. I hear you tossing and turning all fucking night.”

Nick shrugged, rinsing his cup and setting it on the drain board.

“Get Jena over here.” Conor’s voice was decided. “I haven’t seen you smile for weeks, dude. You need to relax and sleep.” Nick opened his mouth, and Conor held up his hand to stop him from speaking. “I know she has school and work, and so do you, but at least you can go to bed and wake up together. I don’t care if she moves in. I like Jen.”

Nicholas shook his head. “I can’t ask her to do that. It would be like adding insult to injury.” He dropped his eyes to study his hands. “She said she loved me…and I couldn’t get the fucking words out of my mouth, Conor. I just froze up. So I can’t ask her to do something else for me when I can’t even give her that.”