Code to Zero (9 page)

She handed out her update and left the building. Driving back to the hangar, her mind turned to Luke, and she realized she had a perfect excuse for calling Anthony. She would tell him about the jet stream, then ask about Luke.

That perked her up, and she hurried into the hangar and up the stairs to her office. She dialed Anthony’s direct line and got him right away. “The launch is likely to be postponed until tomorrow,” she told him. “There are strong winds in the stratosphere.”

“I didn’t know there were winds up there.”

“There’s one, it’s called the jet stream. The postponement isn’t definite, there’s a weather review meeting at five. How’s Luke?”

“Let me know the upshot of that meeting, okay?”

“Of course. How’s Luke?”

“Well, we have a problem there.”

Her heart missed a beat. “What kind of a problem?”

“We’ve lost him.”

Elspeth felt cold. “What?”

“He slipped away from my men.”

“Jesus, help us,” she said. “Now we’re in trouble.”

Luke arrived back in Boston at dawn. He parked the old Ford, slipped in through the back door of Cambridge House, and climbed the service stairs to his room. Anthony was fast asleep. Luke washed his face and fell into bed in his underwear.

Next thing he knew, Anthony was shaking him, saying, “Luke! Get up!”

He opened his eyes. He knew that something bad had happened, but he could not recall what it was. “What’s the time?” he mumbled.

“It’s one o’clock, and Elspeth is waiting for you downstairs.”

The mention of Elspeth’s name jogged his memory, and he recalled what the calamity was. He did not love her anymore. “Oh, God,” he said.

“You’d better go down and see her.”

He had fallen in love with Billie Josephson. That was the disaster. It would make a train wreck of all their lives: his own, Elspeth’s, Billie’s, and Anthony’s.

“Hell,” he said, and he got up.

He stripped off his underwear and took a cold shower. When he closed his eyes he saw Billie, her dark eyes flashing, her red mouth laughing, her white throat. He pulled on a pair of flannels, a sweater, and tennis shoes, then staggered downstairs.

Elspeth was waiting in the lobby, the only part of the building where girls were allowed, except on specially designated Ladies’ Afternoons. It was a spacious hall with a fireplace and comfortable chairs. She was as eye-catching as ever, in a wool dress the color of bluebells, and a big hat. Yesterday, the sight of her would have gladdened his heart; today, the knowledge that she had dressed up for him just made him feel even more wretched.

She laughed when she saw him. “You look like a small boy who can’t wake up!”

He kissed her cheek and slumped into a chair. “It took hours to get to Newport,” he said.

“You’ve obviously forgotten you’re supposed to take me to lunch!” Elspeth said brightly.

He looked at her. She was beautiful, but he did not love her. He did not know whether he had loved her before, but he was sure he did not now. He was the worst kind of heel. She was so gay this morning, and he was going to ruin her happiness. He did not know how to tell her. He felt so ashamed it was like a pain in his heart.

He had to say something. “Can we skip lunch? I haven’t even shaved.”

A troubled shadow crossed her pale, proud face, and he realized that she knew perfectly well something was wrong; but her reply was carefree. “Of course,” she said. “Knights in shining armor need their beauty sleep.”

He told himself he would have a serious talk with her, and be completely honest, later in the day. “I’m sorry you got dressed up for nothing,” he said miserably.

“It wasn’t for nothing—I saw you. And your fellow housemen seemed to like my outfit.” She stood up. “Anyway, Professor and Mrs. Durkham are having a jolly-up.” That was Radcliffe slang for a party.

Luke stood and helped her into her coat. “We could meet later.” He had to tell her today—it would be deceitful to let any more time pass without revealing the truth.

“That’ll be fine,” she said gaily. “Pick me up at six.” She blew him a
kiss and walked out like a movie star. He knew she was faking, but it was a good act.

He returned woefully to his room. Anthony was reading the Sunday paper. “I made coffee,” he said.

“Thanks.” Luke poured a cup.

“I owe you big time,” Anthony went on. “You saved Billie’s hide last night.”

“You’d do the same for me.” Luke sipped his coffee and began to feel better. “Seems we got away with it. Has anyone said anything to you this morning?”

“Not a thing.”

“Billie’s quite a gal,” Luke said. He knew it was dangerous to talk about her, but he could not help it.

“Isn’t she great?” Anthony said. Luke observed with dismay the look of pride on his roommate’s face. Anthony went on, “I kept asking myself: ‘Why shouldn’t she go out with me?’ But I didn’t think she would. I don’t know why, maybe because she’s so neat and pretty. And when she said yes, I couldn’t believe my ears. I wanted to ask for it in writing.”

Extravagant overstatement was Anthony’s way of being amusing, and Luke forced a smile, but secretly he was appalled. To steal someone else’s girlfriend was despicable in any circumstances, but the fact that Anthony was obviously crazy about Billie made everything even worse.

Luke groaned, and Anthony said, “What’s the matter?”

Luke decided to tell him half the truth. “I’m not in love with Elspeth anymore. I think I have to end it.”

Anthony looked shocked. “That’s too bad. You two are quite an item.”

“I feel like a jerk.”

“Don’t crucify yourself. It happens. You’re not married—not even engaged.”

“Not officially.”

Anthony raised his eyebrows. “Have you proposed?”

“No.”

“Then you’re not engaged, officially or unofficially.”

“We’ve talked about how many children we’ll have.”

“You’re still not engaged.”

“I guess you’re right, but all the same I feel like a rotter.”

There was a tap at the door, and a man Luke had never seen before came in. “Mr. Lucas and Mr. Carroll, I presume?” He wore a shabby suit but had a haughty manner, and Luke guessed he was a college proctor.

Anthony leaped to his feet. “We are,” he said. “And you must be Dr. Uterus, the famous gynecologist. Thank God you’ve come!”

Luke did not laugh. The man was carrying two white envelopes, and Luke had a pessimistic feeling he knew what they were.

“I’m the clerk to the Dean of Students. He’s asked me to hand you these notes in person.” The clerk gave them an envelope each and left.

“Hell,” Anthony said as the door closed. He ripped open his envelope. “God damn it.”

Luke opened his and read the short note inside.

Dear Mr. Lucas,

Please be good enough to come and see me in my study at three o’clock this afternoon.

 

Yours sincerely,
Peter Ryder
Dean of Students

Such letters always meant disciplinary trouble. Someone had reported to the Dean that there had been a girl in the House last night. Anthony would probably be expelled.

Luke had never seen his roommate afraid—his insouciance always seemed unshakable—but now he was pale with shock. “I can’t go home,” he whispered. He had never said much about his parents, but Luke had a vague picture of a bullying father and a long-suffering mother. Now he guessed the reality might be worse than he had imagined. For a moment, Anthony’s expression was a window into a private hell.

Then there was a knock at the door, and in came Geoff Pidgeon, the amiable, chubby occupant of the room opposite. “Did I just see the Dean’s clerk?”

Luke waved his letter. “Too damn right.”

“You know, I haven’t said a word to anyone about seeing you with that girl.”

“But who did?” Anthony said. “The only sneak in the House is Jenkins.” Paul Jenkins was a religious zealot whose mission in life was to reform the morals of Harvard men. “But he’s away for the weekend.”

“No, he’s not,” Pidgeon said. “He changed his plans.”

“Then it’s him, damn his eyes,” Anthony said. “I’m going to strangle the son of a bitch with my own hands.”

If Anthony were expelled, Luke realized suddenly, Billie would be free. He felt ashamed of such a selfish thought when his friend’s life was about to be ruined. Then it struck him that Billie might be in trouble too. He said, “I wonder if Elspeth and Billie have had letters.”

Anthony said, “Why would they?”

“Jenkins probably knows the names of our girlfriends—he takes a prurient interest in such things.”

Pidgeon said, “If he knows the names, we can be sure he reported them. That’s what he’s like.”

Luke said, “Elspeth is safe. She wasn’t here, and no one can prove she was. But Billie could be expelled. Then she’ll lose her scholarship. She explained it to me last night. She won’t be able to study anywhere else.”

“I can’t worry about Billie now,” Anthony said. “I have to figure out what I’m going to do.”

Luke was shocked. Anthony had got Billie into trouble, and by Luke’s code he should be more worried about her than about himself. But Luke saw a pretext to talk to Billie, and he could not resist it. Suppressing a guilty feeling, he said, “Why don’t I go to the girls’ dorm and see whether Billie’s back from Newport yet?”

“Would you?” Anthony said. “Thanks.”

Pidgeon went out. Anthony sat on the bed, smoking gloomily, while
Luke quickly shaved and changed his clothes. Although he was in a hurry, he dressed with care, in a soft blue shirt, new flannel pants, and his favorite gray tweed jacket.

It was two o’clock when he reached the Radcliffe dormitory quadrangle. The redbrick buildings were arranged around a small park where students strolled in pairs. This was where he had kissed Elspeth, he recalled unhappily, at midnight on a Saturday at the end of their first date. He detested men who switched loyalties as readily as they changed their shirts, yet here he was doing the thing he disdained—and he could not stop.

A uniformed maid let him into the lobby of the dorm. He asked for Billie. The maid sat at a desk, picked up a speaking-tube of the kind used on ships, blew into the mouthpiece, and said, “Visitor for Miss Josephson.”

Billie came down wearing a dove-gray cashmere sweater and a plaid skirt. She looked lovely but distraught, and Luke longed to take her in his arms and comfort her. She, too, had been summoned to the office of Peter Ryder, and she told him that the man who had delivered her letter also left one for Elspeth.

She showed him into the smoking room, where girls were allowed to receive male visitors. “What am I going to do?” she said. Her face was drawn with distress. She looked like a grieving widow.

Luke found her even more ravishing than yesterday. He longed to tell her that he would make everything all right. But he could not think of a way out. “Anthony could say it was someone else in the room, but he’d have to produce the girl.”

“I don’t know what I’m going to tell my mother.”

“I wonder if Anthony would pay a woman, you know, a street woman, to say it was she.”

Billie shook her head. “They wouldn’t believe it.”

“And Jenkins would tell them it was the wrong girl. He’s the sneak that reported you.”

“My career is over.” With a bitter smile, she said, “I’ll have to go back to Dallas and be a secretary to an oil man in cowboy boots.”

Twenty-four hours ago Luke had been a happy man. It was hard to believe.

Two girls in coats and hats burst into the lounge. Their faces were flushed. “Have you heard the news?” said one.

Luke was not interested in news. He shook his head. Billie said desultorily, “What’s happened?”

“We’re at war!”

Luke frowned. “What?”

“It’s true,” said the second girl. “The Japanese have bombed Hawaii!”

Luke could hardly take it in. “Hawaii? What the heck for? What’s in Hawaii?”

Billie said, “Is this true?”

“Everyone’s talking about it on the street. People are stopping their cars.”

Billie looked at Luke. “I’m frightened,” she said.

He took her hand. He wanted to say he would take care of her, no matter what.

Two more girls rushed in, talking excitedly. Someone brought a radio downstairs and plugged it in. There was an expectant silence while they waited for it to warm up. Then they heard an announcer’s voice. “The battleship
Arizona
is reported destroyed and the
Oklahoma
sunk in Pearl Harbor. First reports say that more than one hundred U.S. aircraft were crippled on the ground at the Naval Air Station on Ford Island and at Wheeler Field and Hickam Field. American casualties are estimated to be at least two thousand dead and a thousand more injured.”

Luke felt a surge of rage. “Two thousand people killed!” he said.

More girls came into the lounge, talking excitedly, and were rudely told to shut up. The announcer was saying: “No warning was given for the Japanese attack, which began at seven-fifty-five
A
.
M
. local time, just before one
P
.
M
. Eastern Standard Time.”

Billie said, “It means war, doesn’t it.”

“You bet it does,” Luke said angrily. He knew it was stupid and irrational to hate a whole nation, but he felt that way all the same. “I’d like to bomb Japan flat.”

She squeezed his hand. “I don’t want you to be in a war,” she said. There were tears in her eyes. “I don’t want you hurt.”

His heart felt ready to burst. “I’m so happy you feel that way.” He smiled ruefully. “The world is falling apart, and I’m happy.” He looked at his watch. “I suppose we all have to see the Dean, even though we’re at war.” Then he was struck by a thought, and he fell silent.

“What?” Billie said. “What is it?”

“Maybe there
is
a way for you and Anthony to stay at Harvard.”

“How?”