Colin and the Magic Bookmark (7 page)

“And I loved that one where Abel got his foot stuck in a tub of custard and he tripped over the cat and fell on the sofa and the cat ate it I mean the custard not the sofa. And so I said to my husband…” No one ever found out what she intended to say, because she changed it to a shriek of terror. “Ya-eeeeeee!” She had just seen the three apparitions that had just come into the lounge-bar, still atmospherically lit by candles. She was staring at the gleaming white pointed fangs of the three demonic creatures that were Colin, Sammy and Mr. Jellysox. She heard them say something. It sounded like, “Urgle scrurgle!” Wide-eyed she clutched her glass, but her other hand pointed trembling at Sammy. “I once had a dog just like that. It's come to haunt me!” she moaned. She turned and scrambled towards the exit. Unfortunately the Countess was just coming in. They both screamed, Mrs. Biggle because of the sudden appearance of a terrifying face in front of her own and the Countess because she thought she was being attacked by a hideous monster. Sammy yapped happily and the false vampire teeth fell out of his mouth. Everyone else, including the Luvvy Duvvy Wuvvies and Mr. Biggle were falling about in their chairs, laughing helplessly. Then Mr. Biggle guiltily set off in search of his wife to reassure her and perhaps sober her up.

Steve strode forward, smiling, and shook hands with Mr. Jellysox and Colin. Then he crouched down to make a fuss of Sammy. “Thank you, guys,” he said.

“Yes, thank you,” echoed Anna, Emily and Josh.

“You rescued us from that dreadful woman,” continued Steve. “Come and have a drink with us.”

 

And so it was that Mr. Jellysox and Colin made friends with the Luvvy Duvvy Wuvvies. Colin found that they were nothing like the awful characters they played on T.V. Mr. Jellysox took some more photos and the actors promised to sign them all for him.

Soon they were joined by the Count, the Countess and Fungus.

The Count explained. “I am not really the owner of the castle. My wife and I and Fungus are actors just like the Luvvy Duvvy Wuvvies here. Our very pale faces are due to make-up.”

“But most of me is real!” laughed Fungus. “I'm actually very ordinary. My real name is John.”

For a long time they talked and talked. Sammy was a focus of attention, as everyone made a great fuss of him and he was everyone's friend. The bookmark glowed warmly in Colin's pocket. It was unsurprisingly quite late, when they all returned to their rooms.

“Goodnight, Colin,” said Mr. Jellysox, who had never had so much fun before.

“Goodnight, Mr. Jellysox.”

“Oh, you can call me Jeremy or rather I'm going to change that to Jez.”

“O.K., Jez. See you in the morning.”

 

The next morning though Mr. Jellysox was puzzled. In fact he was
very
puzzled.

Work had just started in the library, when he said,”Colin, you know I've got a holiday booked at that new hotel?”

Colin replied cautiously, thinking that it would perhaps be unwise to call his boss Jeremy or even Jez, “Yes, you told me last week.”

“But I seem to have got some very strange photos taken there. You and Sammy are in some of them and so are some people I have never met. The lounge is very unusual, definitely the one at the hotel. It's all very odd.”

He handed the photos to Colin, who looked at them and smiled.

“Yes, it could be the hotel. That looks a bit like me with Sammy, and I think these other people are the Luvvy Duvvy Wuvvies. Perhaps you've seen them on T.V.?”

“No, I don't think so. Never mind. It'll have to remain a mystery.”

Colin felt it best to agree with Mr. Jellysox, but he was thinking back to the previous night, when he had found himself once more in his armchair with Sammy on his lap. He had been very tired. He had closed the special book, and had gone straight to bed and fallen asleep immediately.

 

It was only after he had finished work for the day and was taking Sammy for his evening walk, that he put his hand in his coat pocket. His fingers touched the set of false vampire teeth, his souvenir from Castle Zorn. The bookmark glowed again. It could not have been a dream.

“Hmm, Sammy,” he said. Before we went to that hotel my book took us into the past. Now it seems to have taken us into the future. I wonder whether we will go to Castle Zorn again and meet Mr. Jellysox there and relive the same adventure. Where else will it take us?”

But that is another story.

 

 

Colin and Sammy were very happy. However, the next time Colin opened his book he had a shock. The bookmark glowed, as he turned the page. By now he had got used to wearing different clothes that matched the kind of story he found himself taking part in. This time, when he looked down at his legs and feet, he saw that he was wearing short trousers. Sammy looked the same as usual, just a little dog, but Colin realised that in this story he was going to be a much younger character, a small boy in fact. He had never been very tall anyway. This could be very interesting.

“Hey, Colin!”

He looked up in surprise. His young cousin, Diana Jones, who was two years older than him, was smiling at him. They were standing in what appeared to be a wood with some very, very tall trees in it and it was a very hot sunny day.

“I'm glad you are here,” said his cousin. “You can help me find my dad. He's lost somewhere here in the jungle.”

“Again?” said Colin.

“Yes, just because he's an explorer, it doesn't mean he has a good sense of direction.”

“Where was he the last time you saw him?”

“Here in Mexico.”

“What was he doing?”

“He was trying to find the long lost Mayan pyramid of Ptica Ptocl. I'm worried. He may have been waylaid by Arth Kirbi, who is looking for it too. That man is really evil, and Dad can be rather absent-minded. He took a call on his mobile this morning and then dashed off, forgetting about me. So, here we are, walking along this track in the forest.”

“Do you know where we're going?” asked Colin. He watched Sammy enjoying all the new smells around him.

Diana stopped and sat down on a log.

“Yes, I think so. I'm hungry.” Taking a plastic box out of her backpack, she offered Colin a sandwich.

“Thank you,” said Colin. “What's in it?”

“Oh, you'll like it. It's snake paste.”

“Snake paste?”

“Yes, anaconda with mustard.”

“Oh”, said Colin and he bit hesitantly into his sandwich. “Actually it's quite good and I like the bread. Here, boy”. He gave a piece of it to Sammy, who gobbled it down eagerly and looked up hoping for more.

“Where did you get these?” asked Colin.

“Oh, I managed to sneak some from Arth Kirbi's truck. Well, it serves him right. He shouldn't have hi-jacked our luggage at the airport.”

“What?”

“It's only a small airport. He picked it up, threw it in his jeep and drove off.”

“What did the police do?”

“Nothing much. That's why we've got to find Dad and A.K.”

“Who is this Arth Kirbi?”

“Oh, he's my Dad's brother, Uncle Arthur actually.”

“And is he that bad?”

“Oh, yes, he really is. Don't be deceived by that smiling face or by those glasses or that curly beard. He reminds me of a teacher I once knew, and
he
was a really nasty piece of work.”

 

The bookmark in Colin's pocket throbbed and glowed. Suddenly he noticed something on the paper the sandwiches had been wrapped in.

“Hey, what's this?” he said, pointing at it.

Diana took the paper from him and peered at it closely. “It looks like a map of some kind,” she replied.

Colin (or Young Colin) was beginning to feel excited. He pointed at something else he had noticed. “There's a funny triangle thing just there.”

“Perhaps it's the pyramid,” suggested Diana. “There are some words. Yes, it says Ptica Ptocl.”

“But the pyramids are in Egypt, aren't they?”

“Yes, the most famous ones are, but Dad said the tribes of Central America built a lot of them here.”

The bookmark glowed again. Sammy yapped and Colin looked up. He wasn't sure what he was looking at. He took a few steps forward. “I think I can see something with a pointed roof through there.” He was facing some huge bushes with tall trees behind them.

“Show me,” ordered Diana. “Watch out and listen for Arth Kirbi. He's probably on our trail.”

“Because of the missing sandwiches?”

“No. Because he thinks I am with my father.”

“What do I listen for?”

“He always listens to a defective walkman. You can hear the music, but it sounds like sausages frying.”

“Oh,” said Colin brightly. “So I look out for a smiling face, glasses, beard, a walkman…”

“And probably humming to himself.”

Young Colin was always optimistic. “I don't think I could miss spotting anyone like that.”

Diana added a note of caution. “You never know. He's a crafty devil. He'll probably have twined some leaves in his beard and around the frames of his glasses for camouflage.”

 

Already Colin, followed by Sammy, was creeping towards the trees. “The entrance is probably over there,” he breathed. Diana was right behind him, as he stepped round the bushes, but neither of them spotted a bearded face with glasses and a walkman entwined with leaves peering through the foliage behind them.

The bookmark glowed and throbbed and Diana and Colin became aware of a voice down in a clearing in the jungle just beyond the building. They peered round the corner of it. Below they saw Arth Kirbi instructing his henchpeople. He towered above his followers, who were all shorter than Young Colin. They listened fearfully, as he spoke in a harsh stage-whisper.

“Now listen, you cretinous earthlings. We must find and reach the Great Pyramid of Ptica Ptocl before that cursed, jammy-devil Jones and his daughter. He has the luck of the devil. Once again he has got away from me, and is probably even now making his way here.

Hench One spoke up courageously. “I thought we…” only to be interrupted by Hench Two.

“I thought you had captured him at San Salvatore?”

“What has gone wrong, great lord?” asked Henchwench, who was always eager to help.

Arth Kirbi did not like to be reminded of his failures.

“No, no!” he cried. “He escaped. That's all you need to know about it. No doubt at this very moment he and his annoyingly cheerful daughter are on their way here to find the pyramid. Your job is to stop my brother O.K. Kirbi from getting there ahead of us.”

“Why, great master?” piped up Dimbo-Dimbo, the smallest and least intelligent of his henchmen.

“Because he is
evil.
He only does good, and I can't stand that. He would give the treasure to the poor people.”

“Is there treasure?” asked Henchwench in surprise.

“Of course there is treasure in the pyramid!” barked Arth Kirbi. “It will not be easy to get it. It is called the Monkey Stones and it is guarded by a fearsome creature, so I have heard.”

Again Dimbo-Dimbo piped up. “How will we recognise your brother, high lord?”

“He looks exactly like me. He is my twin, but he has an unmistakably posh voice just like this.” Putting on a very refined English accent, Arth Kirby said, “Oh, I say, chaps!”

“We couldn't fail to recognise him then,” said Dimbo-Dimbo confidently.

Arth Kirbi curled his lip in contempt. “You miserable low-life specimens are capable of missing anything. Bright you are not, but that is the reason I picked you. However, I need a volunteer.”

Eager to please their master, all of the henchmen stepped forward. Arth Kirbi scratched his beard. “In that case,” he said, “we need to carry out a little test. Henchwench, you climb onto that rock and observe. You others in turn will hurl yourselves off the rock, when I give the word.”

 

In amazement Diana and Colin watched what was happening below. Arth Kirbi's henchmen scrambled up onto the rock and formed a queue with Dimbo-Dimbo taking up the rear. Arth Kirbi drew himself up to his full height and bellowed, “Wait for it! Wait for it! Now!” One after the other all his henchmen hurled themselves gleefully from the rock, disappearing from sight and each giving a little cry on landing.

“What can you see, Henchwench?” asked Arth Kirbi.

“They are all stuck up to their knees in the mud of the river-bed,” she said, “except for Dimbo-Dimbo. He is stuck head first!”

“Then he is the one,” decided Arth Kirbi with a grim smile. “Tell the others to haul him out.”