Coming Home to You (10 page)

The accompanying photograph was of her and James. How young they both looked. Back then, Kate would never have guessed his fate, or that she’d write a book about him. She certainly would never have imagined she’d one day sleep in his brother’s house.

She put away the article, undressed and turned off the light. The bed was old, but comfortable.

She’d started this day not liking Bret, but had come to realize there was much about him
to
like—his dedication to the kids at Pine Acres, for one.

His reasons for not adopting didn’t make sense, though. He was hiding something, something she was determined to ferret out. If she could keep her mild attraction for him under control, she might succeed.

He was cute. Okay, she admitted with a sigh, more than cute. And she was more than
mildly
attracted. But she couldn’t let either interfere with the job she had to do here.

Maybe she was allowing her admiration for James to trick her into feeling something for Bret that didn’t exist. James’s friendship, although it had only lasted a few hours, had meant a great deal to her. She could be transferring her admiration for one brother to the other.

That was probably it. Or maybe she’d
wanted
to be charmed. Heaven knows, she was long overdue. She
hadn’t felt such curiosity about a man in a long time. Not since…

Closing her eyes, she tried to call up Bret’s face, but it was James who appeared.

“Please, not tonight,” she whispered to him in the dark, knowing it would do no good. He would invariably haunt her dreams…as he’d haunted them so often in the past fourteen years.

S
HE’D BEEN NINETEEN
and James twenty-four the weekend he gave a concert in Manhattan and came into her life, unknowingly altering it. One day, just one tiny thread in the unending fabric of time, but she’d carry the memory in her head and her heart forever.

Away from home, living in a strange city and dealing with the recent death of her mother from cancer, she’d never felt more alone or afraid. In James, she’d seen herself as she might be: confident, fearless, able to handle the problems that came with being considered gifted.

He’d offered her friendship when no one wanted to be her friend. And brief as that friendship had been, it had gotten her through one of the most difficult periods of her life.

Having graduated with highest honors from DePaul University two years early, she’d entered the Graduate School of Journalism at Columbia University, still in her teens, way too bright and too young to ever hope to fit in. She’d begun to see her intelligence as a curse. Always on display, humiliated if she made a mistake, she learned not to make mistakes.

Outwardly, she was an adult, but emotionally she was still a child. When things got too rough, she lost
herself in the music of James Hayes, because she believed he somehow understood her pain. She conjured up a mystical connection with him through his music, and that connection sustained her during the bleakest moments.

The things some people said about him, that he was a little wild and drank too much and always had a different woman at his side, didn’t matter. In truth, those things were exciting. Everything about him was exciting, from the way he looked to the timbre of his voice. But it was his talent Kate admired the most. His lyrics were poetry and the music touched her soul. He spoke to her directly in his songs; she was certain of that.

To meet him, to be able to sit and talk to him face-to-face, was a dream she harbored but never expected to come true. When it happened, she convinced herself that divine intervention was the cause. In reality, it was nothing more than his band manager Malcolm Elliot’s idea of a publicity stunt….

P
EOPLE FROM THE
college and members of Hayes’s band and entourage packed the suite. “I see him,” one of the other students said with excitement, craning his neck to look over the crowd. The others surged forward. Kate fought to retain her position in front, but she was soon at the back of the group.

“Everyone,” she heard Mr. Elliot say, “this is James Hayes. Jamie, these are the scholarship students I told you about.” At the man’s prompting, four of them rattled off their names and hometowns. “And…where’d the young kid go? There she is.” He
reached through the other people, grabbed her above the elbow and pulled her forcefully toward him.

Someone stuck a foot out, or maybe she simply stumbled. With the sickening realization that she was about to make a fool of herself, Kate flew forward and out of Mr. Elliot’s grasp. She landed hard against the chest of James Hayes, nearly knocking him down.

“Whoa!” he said. His arms came up to steady her.

She looked up to find herself staring into extraordinary eyes that reminded her of a cloudless sky on a warm spring day. The apology she should have offered flew right out of her head. “Stupid idiot,” she blurted, instead.

Until one of the other students groaned, she didn’t realize she’d said the words out loud.

“Oh, no, I meant me!” she explained, horrified.

James smiled softly with understanding. “I can’t think of a nicer way to meet a pretty lady than to have her fall into my arms.”

He thought she was pretty? Against her will, she smiled.

“Ah,” he said, “and look at that fantastic smile. Lady, you’re breakin’ my heart.”

She knew she should thank him for the compliment, but she had difficulty thinking or speaking when he still had his arms around her and his face was so close. His dark hair fell straight and shiny to his shoulders from a center part. An intriguing dimple in his chin called out for her to touch it, to put her fingers there and play with it.

He didn’t appear in a hurry to let her go, and she couldn’t have moved if the building was on fire. But then, to her disappointment, Mr. Elliot interrupted to
suggest they sit while the photographer took her shots for the article.

Kate pulled out of James’s arms and stepped back. He was taller than she’d imagined he’d be, and thinner in person than in his photographs. The black T-shirt and black jeans gave him no definition, but in her eyes, he was absolutely perfect.

Mr. Elliot guided them to a sofa at the other end of the room. Everyone waited for James to sit, then Mr. Elliot arranged the rest of them around him—the two other girls on either side of him, one boy in a chair pulled up on the right, and the other boy sitting on the floor.

“We’ll shoot you and Jamie separately,” he told Kate, making her heart flutter. “Genius meets genius. The fans will love it.”

This couldn’t be real. Any minute she was going to wake up and realize she’d only been dreaming about James again, that he wasn’t really sitting ten feet away, that he hadn’t just winked at her.

When the photographer finished the group shots, Mr. Elliot ushered the other students across the room to meet the band. Kate took her place next to James.

“What’s your name?” he asked.

“Kathryn.”

“Kathryn. That’s an awfully formal name, isn’t it?”

“Some people call me Kate.”

“Kind of severe. How about…Katie? That fits you.”

She nodded. “My dad sometimes calls me that.”

“You can call me Jamie like my friends do. So, Katie, do you like going to school here?”

“It’s okay, I guess. Sometimes.”

“You don’t seem sure.”

She shrugged. “School’s okay, but a few of the people are a little unfriendly. They don’t seem to like me very much.”

“That’s hard to believe. What do they do?”

“Ignore me mostly, but that doesn’t bother me too much because I’ve gotten used to it. Only…a few have made a career out of trying to embarrass me in class, to make me look foolish or stupid in front of my instructors. Because I’m younger, I guess. They don’t think I should be here. They make my life hell.”

“They’re jealous you’re so bright.”

“I guess that’s part of it. I’m an easy target.” And this article would only make things worse, but she wouldn’t ever have turned down the opportunity. “Sometimes I think I…” She shook her head. “I’m sorry. This is crazy. You’re James Hayes! I shouldn’t be boring
you
with the problems of my crappy little life.”

“You’re not boring me. I’m interested. What were you about to say?”

“Really? You really want to hear it?”

“I really do. It’s been a lifetime since I’ve sat down with a nice girl and had a normal conversation. I’m enjoying myself. Now, tell me what you were going to say.”

“That I’m thinking about dropping out of school and returning home. I’m not happy here. I feel so…I don’t know…out of place.”

“Hey, now, wait a minute. I’m really sorry you’re having such a rotten time, but I’d hate to see you do
something drastic like drop out when you obviously have so much going for you. You can get through this rough spell, can’t you? Everybody has one now and then.”

“Have you?”

“Yeah, sure. More than one. When my first album went double platinum, practically every reviewer in the country said it was a fluke and predicted I’d be a one-shot wonder. Certain people can always find something they don’t like about you. And when they can’t find something bad, they make it up. It happens to me all the time.”

“What do you do about it? Doesn’t it hurt? I can’t stand it when someone talks bad about me or excludes me.”

“Oh, yeah, it hurts like hell, but I like what I’m doing, so I keep going and I ignore what people say. That’s what you have to do. Believe in yourself. You’re the only person you have to please.”

She sighed. “You make it sound so easy.”

“It’s not. Being different means you have to put up with a lot, especially from people who are ordinary. A time will come, though, when you’ll be glad you’re special.”

“I wish I believed that. Sometimes I feel like such a freak.”

“Trust me when I say that a few years from now you’ll wonder why the opinion of these people ever mattered.”

“So you think I should tough it out?”

“Yeah, I do. People can’t hurt you unless you give them the power to hurt you. Be strong, and don’t let those jerks get away with making you feel bad about
yourself. You don’t
really
want to drop out of school, do you?”

“No,” she said, shaking her head. “Not really. I want to be a journalist. I like finding out about people and telling their stories. And the program here is really good. I’m learning a lot.”

“Then don’t let anybody push you into giving up your dream.” He put his finger under her chin. “Now, show me that pretty smile of yours, and promise me you’ll never again give anyone the power to hurt you.”

She smiled, and for once didn’t feel as if her smile was ugly. “I promise.”

“That’s my girl.”

Once the interviewer was finished with her questions, Kate and James talked for a couple of hours more. He shared stories about his half sister, Ellen, and he showed her a photograph of his brother, Bret, when he was younger, holding up a huge catfish he’d caught in their grandfather’s pond.

“Jamie,” Mr. Elliot called, and they both looked up. He tapped his watch.

“I guess Malcolm’s trying to tell me I need to get ready for rehearsal. You’re coming to hear us play tonight, aren’t you? I’m giving a special concert for the students and faculty.”

“I don’t have a ticket. I camped out for two days before they went on sale last month so I’d be sure to get one, but when the box office opened, they were gone in fifteen minutes.”

“Would you still like to come? I can have Malcolm arrange it.”

Her pulse leaped with expectation. “Are you serious? He can do that?”

“Malcolm can do almost anything.” He motioned for Mr. Elliot, who immediately walked over. “Malcolm, I’d like Katie to be my guest at the concert tonight. Fix it for me, would you?”

“Sure thing, Jamie.”

“And you’d better arrange for a chaperon. I don’t want to destroy the young lady’s reputation.”

“Good idea.” He scurried off.

“Okay, then,” James told Kate, laughing at her stunned expression. “It’s a date.”

It’s a date
.

He meant it as a figure of speech, not a real date, but that didn’t stop Kate from pretending as she sat in the audience that night, listening to James sing. He actually invited her up on stage, introduced her as his friend and sang a song to her. She didn’t think she cared about anyone at that precise moment as much as she did him.

When the song ended, the audience went wild. James leaned over and gave her a kiss on the cheek, then escorted her to some steps at the side of the stage. “We’re leaving right after the show,” he said in her ear as the applause continued. “I won’t see you again. You take care. And remember…be proud of your gifts.”

“I will.” As she looked at him, she knew the admiration and physical desire she felt for him showed openly in her face. All he had to do was ask her to stay with him and she would.

He smiled. “Go on, now. My world is no place for you.”

She nodded, knowing he was right. “I’ll never forget you, Jamie. I swear it.”

“Sweet Katie, I envy the man who one day really steals your heart.”

A
S SHE’D PROMISED
, she never forgot him. He’d given her a precious gift that night. By singling her out, by announcing she was his friend, he’d elevated her to a position of importance. Most of the students who’d teased her stopped. Two or three treated her no differently, but it didn’t matter because James had given her the power to disregard their pettiness.

She’d taken his advice and stopped apologizing for her intelligence. Instead, she’d made it work for her, first in her career as a journalist and later as a biographer.

For years after that she considered contacting him, to let him know how much his kindness that day had meant to her. But she knew he wouldn’t remember her or might confuse her with one of a thousand other girls he’d met on the road, and she didn’t want anything to spoil the magic of the most wonderful day of her life.

The idea of returning his kindness never left her, but offering James something that his fame and fortune couldn’t provide seemed impossible. Now, at last, she could repay the debt, even if it
was
after his death. She was at the peak of her career, and her name on the cover of a book guaranteed it would be read by millions. With the twentieth anniversary of the release of his first album approaching, the timing was perfect. This was a chance to remind the world of his talent, rather than his vices.

Everything was coming together—finally. The only obstacle to her project and her peace of mind was a teenager holding a big fish—a kid who’d grown up to become a handsome, stubborn and confusing man. And Lord help her, he was every bit as fascinating as his older brother.