Complicated by You (6 page)

“I have plenty of skirts like this. I just don’t wear them in front of you.”

He kept his hand on my thigh and massaged the area. “Why don’t you wear them with me?”

“We never do things that would allow me to wear one. You always want to bowl, or do laser tag.”

“We go to the movies,” he countered.

“True.” I yawned. “Do you want me to wear a skirt when I’m with you or something?”

He added pressure to the massage. “It’s up to you, but in my personal opinion you really have nice legs. You should flaunt them from time to time, just not around fraternity douchebags.”

“Just around you?”

He paused from massaging and rested his hand above my knee. A minute of silence passed. I figured he wasn’t going to answer the question.

“Okay. Let me go.” I opened my eyes and caught him staring at the little bit of pink panty that peeked out from under the skirt. Shocked, I scooted the skirt down. It must’ve rode up while I battled with him. A red tent spread across his face as he blushed with embarrassment.

To recover us both from the moment, I joked, “Thanks for telling me my panties were showing, dickhead.”

“I think I was too shocked they were pink. I figured you for a black silk type of a girl.”

“I wear black too.”

“Yeah?” He turned to me. Something lingered in his eyes. If he’d been another man, I would’ve said hunger. “What other colors do you wear?”

For some reason, I moistened a little. Maybe it was because I’d planned on hooking up with Marcus and still had those hormones rushing through me. Perhaps it was because every sexual fantasy of mine casted Jay in the scene. “I like them all.”

“I bet you do.”

I formed my lips into a wicked grin. “Careful, Jay. You have the slut of the year sitting on your lap. You may want to tone down the flirting.”

“Is that what I was doing?”

I refused to answer the question. It would just put me out on the edge, displaying all of my feelings for him. If I said yes or no, he’d have an easy out if he wasn’t flirting. “Are you going to let me get off your lap or what? I doubt Cynthia would appreciate this.”

“She knows we’re close.”

“Not panty watching close.”

He slowly rubbed his lips with one hand and sighed. “Can I sleep in your bed?”

“Why not sleep in hers?”

“She did the whole phone thing again. I told her I was done with her.”

“Yippee. So now you want to sleep in my bed and flood the room with tension.”

“I’m too tired to run all the way to my room and the last time I slept on the couch here in the lobby I woke up to five chicks over me, pulling up my shirt and taking pictures. There were all types of pics on Facebook by the end of the day.”

I’d seen them and drooled over a few of the ones showing his bare chest. “You have a real tough life, huh?”

“Yes, but that’s only because I have a stubborn and beautiful best friend that enjoys spending her time with losers.” He picked me up as he rose and carried me to the room.

“Losers?” I lay back in his arm and enjoyed the ride. “Why don’t you pick a guy then, and pick him soon. I’m so horny I might hump your leg in the middle of the night.”

“I’d enjoy it. I’m pretty horny myself. Although if you try to hump me, I’m slipping something inside of you.”

“Yeah right.”

“I wouldn’t test that theory tonight, Evie.”

“You’re not ready for a woman like me. You’re scared, but let’s say you had the balls to slip something inside of me. I would break you. I would make you rethink everything, your life, future, religion—”

He snorted. “I would stop being a Christian because of what’s in your panties?”

“Nope. You would finally know for sure that there is a God. That there’s no question he exists.” I giggled.

“Thank God, you’re beautiful. If you were a guy, you wouldn’t be able to pick up anybody with those lines.”

“Hater. You’re just scared.”

He stopped a few feet before my door and let me down. I turned towards the door. He caught my waist, tugged me his way, and pressed my back into the wall. A neutral expression covered his face like a mask. “You really think so?”

“What?”

“You think I’m scared to have sex with you?”

I widened my eyes and couldn’t believe what he’d asked me. “What?”

“You think I’m scared to have sex with you?”

“We were just joking.”

“But if we weren’t?” He moved in closer.

“We were.”

“Answer me. Do you think I’m scared to fuck you?” The question hummed between my thighs.

“No.” I stalled a little, tried to regain my composure. “I just don’t think you see me that way. You’re my friend.”

“But I’m not blind and I do have a dick with a mind of its own.”

My lips parted. No words flowed out.

He leaned in closer. “As far as I knew, you studied at the library, dated the occasional geek, all of them African American by the way, and then hung out with me as an afterthought. Tonight, you tell me you’re out there having one-night stands with frat boy losers. Anything else I should know?”

“We never really share our sexual lives with each other.”

He nodded in agreement. “Maybe we should. Do you really think I’m scared to make love to you?”

I looked away from him. My heart pounded in my chest. This was going to an odd place, and fast, without me being sober enough to dissect it and take my time with each word.

This is why I don’t drink around his ass. He always gets me caught up in conversation. He’s always discovering the truth about me whether I want him to know or not.

“I’m tired.” I ran my fingers through my hair. “Let’s go to sleep.”

He held up one finger. “I’m not scared to fuck you—”

“Jay, we were only joking.”

“I’ve never been scared. I just didn’t think it would be smart to fuck the one person in my life who’s been like a sister to me. And worst-case scenario, sex with you could be complicated and result in my losing not just a sister, but a mother. Besides my grandparents, you and Mrs. Elaine are all I have in this world.”

I shook my head. “Mom and I would always be there for you regardless and—”

“I’m not scared.”

I hit my head against the wall. “Fine, Jay. You’re not scared.”

He planted his hands on the area of the wall above my face. He guided his tongue across his bottom lip. “I’ll be a gentleman tonight because you’re drunk, but trust me, if you weren’t and … ”

My heart stopped. “And what?”

“Never mind. We’ll just regret this conversation later and both feel strange … Maybe I am scared.” But he didn’t move, his gaze drifted to my chest as it rose and fell. My nipples hardened under his attention. My sex twisted into wet throbbing knots. “I’m not used to losing, Evie. But, for some reason I’ve always felt like, if I took it there with you, I would lose.”

“Lose what?”

“Lots of things.”

I shook my head. “Are you sure you haven’t been drinking? You’re talking crazy. Besides, if you wanted me so bad, why didn’t you ever tell me after all these years?”

“What? I’m always making it known that I’m attracted to you!” His voice got louder suddenly. Cynthia would be able to hear him. I doubted that would be good for either of us.

“Shh. Keep your voice down.” I glanced around the hallway.

“Every damn day, I tell you that you’re beautiful and that you have a hot body.  Practically every damn day. I’m always touching you.”

“Which means nothing.”

“When a guy touches a woman anywhere on her body, it doesn’t matter where, it could be her hand, arm, the curve of her neck, the center of her back, her hair, her damn ear, anywhere, but if he’s touching her that’s the first sign that he’s interested. My hands are all over you. How could you not know how crazy I am about you?”

“Because you didn’t just say it.” My voice came out low and needy.

“I said it with my hands!”

“Your hands suck at communicating.”

“Forget about it. Just so you understand, even though you probably won’t even remember this.” He leaned in to the side of my face and brushed his lips against my ear. “I’ve thought about us, since seventh grade. It’s the majority of the reason why I used to make up reasons to convince you to skinny dip with me. Did you really believe searching for oysters required no clothing?”

“At thirteen it seemed plausible and … I did want to see you naked.”

“And I’m constantly bumping into you. Nothing about me is clumsy, but when you’re around, I’m always falling into you and using my hands on your body to maintain balance. I’m always touching you, not because you’re my friend—”

“Whatever. That’s just how you are.”

“Only with you.”

I sucked my teeth. “I don’t believe you.”

He whispered into my ear, “I’m not scared.”

“Fine.”

“I’m not.”

“I heard you.”

“I’m not scared to lift you up right now, whip that skirt up, tear your panties apart, and kiss that sweet area between your thighs.”

“Okay.” The word came out as a squeak.

“I’m never scared to make love to you. Never.”

“Well … I’m not scared either.”

Take that.

I hoped confidence showed on my face because in my core nerves tightened together in a bundle of stress and fear of rejection.

He landed a light kiss on my neck, like a test move to gauge my reaction. My skin shivered where he’d touched. My breathing increased with just that little gesture. I hoped he would do more. He planted another kiss on my collarbone and stayed there for a second longer. I’d thought my nipples were hard, but now they were as stiff as steel.

“You say you’ve had a lot of one-night stands on campus. You’re so lucky I don’t know who they are.” He inhaled my scent. A deep grumble hummed in his throat. “If you let me make love to you, you’d beg for another round. I’m not a one-night stand type of guy.”

“I didn’t think you were.”

“But you thought I was some guy who couldn’t see beauty right in front of me?”

“I didn’t think I was your type.”

He drew away from me and pierced me with his gaze. “What’s my type?”

“White.”

“It’s always about race with you.”

“No.”

“Yes it is.” He shifted his gaze to the bottom of my skirt. “I should punish you the first time for taking so long to let me know that you were interested too. It seems I’m learning all types of things about you tonight. You sleep around. You would let me fuck you, although you think I’m a closed-minded dater. Any other confessions?”

“Oh, are we really going there?”

“Yes.” He stepped back, leaned on the wall across from me, and drank me in with his gaze as if daring me to come forward. Using all of my liquid courage from the alcohol earlier, I closed the distance and pressed my aching nipples against him. He grunted in delight.

“I’m not one of those chicks you’re used to.” I got on the tip of my toes. “I don’t answer phones when your tongue is inside of my pussy. Once you’re down there, you’ll be feasting for days.”

He groaned, dipped his head my way, and glided those soft lips down to my neck. “Give me one reason why I shouldn’t take you back to the lobby couch, pull up that skirt, and lick to see if that’s true. Can you think of a reason why I shouldn’t?”

“No.” I arched forward as he sucked on the curve of my neck.

“Jay, are you done yet?” My room’s door opened. I jumped back to the other side and turned my face away from Cynthia as she strolled out. Lust pulsed through my veins. If I had balls, they would be blue and swollen. If I had a dick, it would be ripping out of my pants. I did my best to conceal my panting and crossed my arms around my chest to hide my nipples. Then a sudden realization hit me.

Why am I hiding? I don’t have to hide. Or do I?
I considered my mom’s words about how the easiest way to get killed was to mess with another woman’s man.
Plus it’s wrong to make out with your roommate’s boyfriend right after they broke up, even if he’s your friend. I do have to live in the room with her the rest of the semester.

“Can we talk now?” Cynthia asked behind me.

I couldn’t see Jay or even look at him. By now my panties were soaked, the top of my thighs were wet with arousal.

“Not tonight.” Annoyance laced Jay’s voice. “Let’s talk in the morning.”

“Are you staying over?” she asked.

“Yes. I’m sleeping in Evie’s bed.”

Oh God. If he lies next to me in my bed, I’m fucking him. I won’t hold back. Cynthia will not go for that, but I wouldn’t be able to help myself.

“What do you mean you’re sleeping in
Evie’s
bed?” she shrieked. “Why? That doesn’t even make any sense! If you think I’m just going to sit there like a good little girl while you just sleep in some other female’s bed. No disrespect to
you
, Evie. I know you both are good friends, but that’s not happening—”

“Cyn, we’re not together,” Jay interrupted. “We broke up.”

“No. We. Did. Not, Jay!” Without looking at her, I could tell that she was about to cry. “Please Jay, all the weeks, the months we’ve spent together. Please, baby, don’t do this to me. Don’t do this to me,” she cried. “What am I going to do without you? If you leave me, I-I … I don’t know what I would do … ”