Connected by the Tide (9 page)

“A little.”

She smiled. “I really like you, too, Henry.”

“Really?”

“Why is that surprising?”

“Well, I just told
you I’m still in love with that girl. That’s a huge turn-off.”

“It is,” she said calmly.

“So I’m surprised you have any interest in me.”

“I like you for a lot of reasons. You are passionate about literatur
e, like I am. You are very sweet and a wonderful gentleman—with the exception of last night—and when you love someone you love them with your whole heart. I would love to be the recipient of that affection someday, to be loved in a very special way.”

“It’ll happen,” he said quickly. “I know it will.”

“And the biggest reason why I like you is because of your honesty. Most men would just lie and pretend there wasn’t someone else on their mind. You saved me a lot of heartache.”

“I would never hurt you, Ren. I promise.”

“I know.”

“I’m lucky you’
re willing to take a chance on me.”

“
Just don’t break my heart. That’s all I ask for.”

“I’m guessing it’s already been broken?”

She nodded.

“What happened?”

“When we were together, he started seeing someone else. He claims he never cheated on me, just talked to her, but I don’t see the difference. If he had feelings for someone else, he should have been honest about it. He left me, not explaining anything, and then I saw him with her. Over time, I put the pieces together.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Yeah.”

“Well, that guy is an idiot.”

“It seems like I always fall for guys who fall for someone else.”

“Who else?”

“One other person.”

“Who?”

“You.”

He stared at her, seeing the adoration in her eyes. She hid it very well, but he could also see the vulnerability. She did a great job appearing strong all the time, but she
’d finally let herself seem weak—around him. “If things were different, I would have fallen in love with you already.”

She
stared at the sand between her toes, avoiding his look.

He grabbed her hand and caressed her fingers with his own. “I would never be physical with you if I wasn’t in love with you. You never have to worry about that.”

“Okay.”

“And I’m not seeing Sydney anymore. I’ll get over her and fall in love with you.”

“I hope so.”

“It’ll be fine,” he said as he wrapped his arm around her shoulder. “You’re safe with me.”

14

Henry was walking across campus toward the admissions building when he saw her.

“Henry?”

He stopped and looked at her, unsure of what to say. “Uh, hi.”

“Hey.” She crossed her arms over her chest while she lo
oked at him.

Henry didn’t want to talk to her or look at her. Every time he did, his heart hurt. He hated feeling this way. When he looked at her face, he noticed her thin legs, kissable and delicious. When he looked at her hair
, he saw the sand of the beach. He remembered all their fun times together. “What?”

“I didn’t know you were going to be here. I just wanted to say hi.”

“Please leave me alone.”

She looked like she had been slapped, pain etched on her face. “Henry, I—”

“I don’t want to see you or talk to you—not for a while. Please just go.”

“How did it get this bad?”

“I don’t know,” he said as he gripped his hair. “I don’t fucking know.”

She stepped toward him and wrapped her arms around him, but he pushed her away.

“Don’t touch me.”

Her eyes started to water with tears. “Is this it? Are we over?”

“I just can’t do this anymore, Syd. I told Coen everything. I need to move on. Every time I see you I just want to kiss you. How am I supposed to move on when I’m in love with you?”

“How can I help?”

“Just stay away from me. Please.”

“I heard you were seeing someone.”

“I’m trying to.”

“Do you like her?”

“I like her a lot.”

“Then you’ll move on soon.”

“Not when I feel this way. I won’t do that to her.”

She said nothing for a long time. “I’m sorry, Henry. I’ll leave you alone.”

“Thank you. Please don’t speak to me unless I speak to you.”

“What about my wedding?”

“What about it?”

“Are you coming?”

He looked at the ground, staring at the concrete. “No.”

She took a deep breath. “Then who’s going to walk me down the aisle?”

He walked over to a nearby tree and slammed his fist into it. “You’ve got to be fucking kidding me! Why they hell would you even consider asking me that?”

“Because you’re my best friend.”

“You have absolutely no regard for me, do you? How do you expect
me
to give you away to someone else?”

“I didn’t mean it like that. I just mean because you’re family.”

“Pull your head out of your ass, Syd.”

She tightened her arms around her stomach, frightened
by his behavior.

“You know what? This helps. Knowing
how selfish you are makes me realize I do need to move on. Thanks for that.” He turned on his heel, then walked across campus, not looking back. She would never understand how much pain she’d caused him. He needed to get away from her and move on. She wasn’t even a dream, just a hallucination.

When he got to his car, he sat inside but didn’t reach for his keys. He just stared out the window, looking at nothing in particular. He wished he had long-term amnesia so he could for
get every feeling he’d ever had for Sydney.

There was a knock on his window. He turned to see Ren smiling at him. He didn’t smile back. He opened the door and looked at her. “Hey,” he said sadly.

She stared at his eyes, seeing the anger spew out. “Coffee?”

“No.”

She continued to stand there. “Can I join you?”

“Whatever.”

She closed the door then walked around, sliding into the passenger seat. She opened her backpack and handed him an Oreo. “I stole some yesterday. Sorry.”

He held the cookie in his hand and felt the black chocolate stick to his fingers. He didn’t eat it, just kept grinding it until it disintegrated. “I can’t do this anymore.”

“You’ll get through it,” she whispered.

“I meant us.”

She adjusted herself in her seat. The seat belt moved as she pulled her knees to her chest. “Why?”

“Who am I kidding? I’ll never be over her. I fucking hate this.”

“You will.”

“No
, I won’t. You deserve someone better than me, not someone who’s so in love with someone else that dying doesn’t sound so bad, just lying dead in a coffin. I wouldn’t have to think about her ever again. It would just be over.”

“I went through the same thing with Dane.”

He tossed the cookie on the windshield.

“It’s hard
, but you’ll get past it.”

“And how did you?”

She intertwined her fingers. “I slept around.”

“Did that help?”

“Eventually. Since I knew he was with someone else, it helped knowing I was with someone else, that someone desired me, wanted me.”

“I don’t think we should see each other anymore. I respect you too much to do this to you. You are beautiful and amazing. Don’t waste your time with me. I’ll always be this way, dark and empty.”

“Are you going to start sleeping around?”

He shrugged. “I guess. Just deal with the pain on my own until I’m over it. When I’m better
, I’ll come back to you, if you aren’t seeing someone by then. I wouldn’t blame you if you were. You shouldn’t wait around for me. I’m not worth the time.”

She crossed her arms over her chest and faced the window, not looking at him. Her thin legs were pulled to her chest, revealing her slender thighs and calves. “I don’t want you to do that.”

“What?”

“Sleep with other people.”

“I don’t know what else to do.”

“Why don’t you sleep with me?”

He looked at her. “I wouldn’t do that to you. I respect you too much to use you. It wouldn’t be fair.”

“Well, I don’t want you to be with someone else.”

“What are you saying, Ren?”

“Use me,” she whispered.

He stared at her for a long time, seeing the blonde hair curve around her face. Her red lips were dark like a cherry, and her skin reminded him of the moon, glowing with its own light. “I can’t. I’ll probably never be over Sydney, so you would just be hurting yourself. I refuse to do that. I actually care about you.”

“It would help both of us.”

“How?”

“It would help you get over Sydney, being in a physical relationship and spending time with
me, no pressure, and it would help me because I’m lonely. I really don’t want you sleeping with other girls. That would hurt me more.”

He sighed. “I’m sorry. I didn’t think of that.”

“Do you see yourself falling in love with me?”

“Definite
ly.”

“Then let’s try it this way.”

“How about I stop seeing you, but I also don’t sleep around with anyone? I just become a hermit instead.”

“So you would be exactly what you were before?” she asked. “
That’s not productive at all.”

He slammed his fist into the horn, making it scream loudly for a second. “I just want to date you like a normal person, fall in love with you
, then make love to you.”

“Well, you can’t.”

“But I want to.”

“You can’t just
instantly get over someone that you’ve been in love with for so long. It’ll take time. Let me help you during the process.”

He ran his fingers through his hair. “Are you sure?”

“Yes.”

“Really?”

“Yes, Henry. As long as you’re always honest with me.”

“
That will never be an issue.”

15

When they arrived at Ren’s house, Henry felt nervous. Now that he was really here to do what they
’d agreed on, he wasn’t sure how he felt about it. They walked inside, and he stalled in the living room, looking at pictures of her family and her friends.

“Come on,” she said as she walked down the hallway.

After a moment of standing still, he followed her.

The bedroom lights were off
, but he could still see her outline. They stared at each other for a long time before she made the first move. She grabbed the hem of her shirt and removed it slowly, pulling her hair with it. When she tossed it on the floor, her hair was in disarray, but Henry thought it still looked sexy.

He stepped closer to her, staring at her breasts in her bra. They were large and perky, and not just because the bra pushed them together. They were round and firm, making her slim waist look even smaller. She stared at him with confidence in her eyes, the desire shining through. She grabbed his shirt and pulled it off, revealing his muscled chest. She ran her fingers over
his skin, enjoying the mounds and lines of his body. Then she unbuttoned his pants and pulled them down, leaving him in his boxers. His erection was throbbing, popped up as it pitched a tent. She gently messaged it, leaving him breathless.

When he didn’t reach for her shorts, she unbuttoned them and pulled them down, leaving her standi
ng in a pink thong. It contrasted with her black bra. Her body was perfect. Every curve looked like it was Photoshopped. Her skin was flawless and smooth. He touched the metal of her belly button, feeling it against his finger. It was warm from touching her skin.

“I’m a sucker for piercings,” he whispered.

Her hands continued to roam over his body before she pulled him to the bed, yanking him on top of her. Her legs surrounded his waist, holding him to her. When he looked down at her, he imagined fucking her as hard as he could. His dick twitched. She was the one of the most beautiful women he had ever seen. Every inch of her was perfect. She was sexy, making him wet. It soaked the front of his boxers. He hadn’t gotten laid in a long time, and he wanted to fuck her.

When she grabbed his face and kissed him, his lips were immobile for a moment. The strong electricity between them shocked him, making him feel numb. Her lips were wet
and soft, tasting like honey. Every groove of her lips touched his. When she breathed into his mouth, a moan escaped him, coming out weak. His hand ran up her chest and caressed her neck, feeling the silky skin. When he cupped her face, he felt the strands of her soft hair. A quiet moan escaped her lips when she felt him push against her, wanting him inside her. When he felt the moisture between them, he wanted to pull down his boxers and slip inside, touching her warmth and shelter, but when he kissed her lips, he felt himself hesitate.

She grabbed his boxers and pulled them down, revealing him. Stunned by his horniness, he didn’t stop her. He felt himself divide into two people, one
who wanted to fuck and one who didn’t. The latter won. “I can’t do this,” he said as he grabbed her hand.

“What?”

“No. I won’t do this to you.”

She pulled away and looked up at him, confusion on her face.

“You’ve always felt like you weren’t good enough, second best. I’m not doing that to you. When we have sex, it’ll be because I’m in love with you, not because I’m in love with someone else. You are amazing and deserve to be treated like the goddess that you are.”

She said nothing for a long time as she stared at him. Then, suddenly
, tears sprang from her eyes, falling down her face.

He didn’t know what he
’d done to upset her. He kissed her tears away, hushing her while he ran his fingers through her hair. His lips absorbed the falling tears, making her face stay dry. She controlled her cries a second later, choking them back. He wanted to ask what had just happened but decided not to. She was obviously distressed. He didn’t want to make it worse.

“That means the world to me,” she whispered.

He pressed his forehead against hers, relieved that he didn’t go through with it. “You can only have a part of my heart for now, but I promise I’ll give you the entire thing eventually. I won’t let you settle for anything less.”

“I don’t want anything less.”

He kissed her, letting his lips linger on hers for a long time.

She ran her fingers through his hair, twisting the ends around her fingers. Her hands trailed down his back, massaging him.

He continued to ravish her with kisses, trying to be connected to her in a silent way. He pulled down the sheets then tucked them both inside. He pulled her to his chest and placed her face close to his, close enough to feel her warm breaths fall on his skin.

“This makes me fall for you even more,” she said as she ran her fingers across his chest.

“I’m glad. I hope you realize how much I care about you. I’ve slept around with women, fucked them without thinking twice about it, then just disappeared.”

“I know. I’m just tired of being the lesser choice. I didn’t realize how much it bothered me until you said it.”

“You’ll never be the lesser choice with me.”

“When Dane left, it hurt me so much. I never felt like I was good enough.”

“He’s an idiot. Don’t let him get you down.”

“And Sydney is an idiot.”

“Well, Coen’s a good guy, too.”

“I’m sure you are still better.”

He said nothing, silently agreeing with her.

“So what does this mean for us?”

“Well, it sounds like we both have issues. We can overcome them together. When I’m over Sydney, you’ll be the first to know.”

“And nothing
physical will happen between us until you are over her?”

“I was hoping we could do other things, unless you don’t want to.”

“Like what?” she said as she smiled at him.

“I really like kissing you.”

“I do, too.”

“I’ve never felt that way when I kissed someone before. It’s usually my least favorite thing to do.”

“I’m okay with that.”

“What else are you okay with?”

“I don’t want to use my dildo anymore.”

“I can help with that,” he said as he kissed her on the neck.

“And I can help you too.”

“Anything oral?”

“I like oral.”

“Good.”

“So just no sex?” she asked.

“Unless you want more boundaries.”

“No. I think that’s good.”

“Okay.”

She cuddled next to him, holding him close to her. Henry felt the release of the tension in her body, like she finally felt safe with him. Her strong front was gone, replaced by her vulnerable side.

“There’s
a lot more to you than your looks.”

“What does that mean?”

“It means you are just as beautiful on the inside as you are on the outside.”

She smiled at him.
“Really?”

“You don’t need to rely on your obvious charms to get my attention. You had me
on the first day of class when you had no idea what zoology meant.”

She laughed. “You didn’t think I sounded stupid?”

“I thought you sounded adorable.”

She tucked her hand behind her ear, like she always did when she was nervous.

“You don’t have to let me be physical with you to keep me around. If you just want to kiss, that’s fine. I won’t go looking for it somewhere else. Whatever you want is fine.”

“Really?”

“Of course.”

“But I want to fool around with you.”

“Okay. We can stop whenever you want.”

“I don’t want to.”

He rose from the bed then pulled on his boxers.

“Where are you going?”

“I heard you have a pool?”

She smiled. “You
wanna go for a swim?”

“Hell
, yeah.”

She
got out of bed, giving him a full view of her ass in a thong.

“Damn.”

She turned around. “What?”

He didn’t even realize he
’d said it. “Uh, nothing.”

She looked at him suspiciously before she pulled her swimsuit
out of a drawer. His boner was so hard that he needed to jump in the pool quickly; otherwise, he was going to be hard all night. They grabbed their towels and walked outside.

Perry stared at Henry silently.

He patted him on the head. “He doesn’t bark.”

“He’s very well trained,” she said.

“Apparently.”

“Perry, bark.”

Perry barked loudly.

“Wow,” Henry said
. “You’ve got him trained.”

“He’s a sweetheart,” she said as she walked down the steps into the water. Her swimsuit was yellow, making her skin look tan
ned. Her waist was petite, a perfect hourglass figure. Her legs were long even though she was short. She was thin but not too thin, having curves in all the right places. Henry stared at her, drool almost spilling out.

“You coming?” she asked with a smile.

He adjusted himself in his boxers. “I’m about to.” He jumped into the pool, making the water splash everywhere. When he broke the surface, she was trying to swim away, but he grabbed onto her, holding her against his chest. “You aren’t getting away from me.”

“I don’t want to get my hair wet.”

“Why? It looks good wet.”

“Because then I’ll have to wash it.”

“I can help you in the shower, if you like.”

“It would probably take longer.”

Henry felt her nipples harden in her swimsuit, pressing against his chest. They were pointy. “Your hot tub work?

“Yes.”

“Let’s go for a dip.”

“Now that your boner is gone?” she asked with a laugh.

“It’ll be back—it always comes back.”

She pulled away then climbed
the stairs. He blatantly stared at her ass as she walked, not making any attempts to be discreet about it. She turned on the hot tub then stepped down into the water. His eyes never left her body.

He join
ed her a second later, sitting in the seat next to her. The water covered their laps, making them feel warm from the waist down. The sun was setting, hiding the sun behind the horizon. Ren pulled her hair into a bun, lifting it from her shoulders. Her neck was thin and slender. He stared at her back, noticing the faint lines of muscle from her toned physique. She had a steep curve in her back, which made her ass look even bigger. “You have a perfect body.”

“I do?”

“At least it’s perfect to me.” He moved in front of her then looked down at her. He placed his hands on her sides. “Tiny waist.” He moved down. “Wide hips.” His hands stopped before they touched her ass. “Don’t even get me started on that.” His hands grazed down her thighs. “Sexy legs.” When he reached her feet, he massaged each one. “And I love these.” The bubbles lapped around him as the jets fired, circulating water through the small pool. He returned to her then ran his hands up her stomach, stopping below her tits. “These are perfect. Just the right size.” He pulled his hands away then placed one on her neck. “Slender neckline.” He looked into her eyes. “And the best feature of all.” He rubbed his nose against hers then kissed her gently. The delicate touch set him on fire like it did earlier, his lips burning with heat. Her mouth opened for him, letting him explore her. His tongue danced around hers, making them both moan. Her wet fingers clenched his hair, pulling the strands. He grabbed her hips then pulled her to him, wrapping her legs around his waist. He sat down on the seat, feeling her on top of him. His cock was hard and throbbing, feeling her pussy right on top of him.

The moment became hot and heavy before he even realized it. A gentle kiss set him off, and now he was touching her everywhere, wanting to be inside her. He thought about fucking her all the time, in class, at home, in the shower—everywhere. He wanted it to happen. His desire for her was immediate and innate.

She wrapped her arms around his neck and started to rub against him gently, stroking his cock. That wasn’t helping him at all. She felt so good he thought he would come right in her hot tub. With one hand, she reached behind her and pulled the string of her bikini, letting it float in the pool.

He broke their kiss and stared at her tits. They were even bigger than he
’d thought. The cold air was making them firm and round, clinging to her chest. They were beautiful and eye-catching. When his chest rubbed against them, he thought he would explode. “Your tits are fucking amazing.”

She grabbed his face and brought his lips to her nipple. He took it into his mouth and started to suck the tip, being gentle at first
, then more aggressive. When he pulled away and blew on each one, she moaned. The sound made his cock twitch. He placed his face in her cleavage and showered it with kisses, licking the chlorine off her skin. She rubbed against him a little harder as he did this, exciting him even more. She pulled the string of her bottoms and let them come loose. Soon, they were floating in the pool alongside her top. She was sitting on him completely naked. He stared at her, running his hands across her body. It was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen. She was perfect. He took a moment and pressed his face against her chest, running his hands up her thighs until he squeezed her ass, feeling the muscle under his grip. He felt his dick twitch again.