Convictions (28 page)

“You might not be wanting to thank me yet,” said Meadows. “What will become of you after Tenerife is an even greater problem.”

“Yes. I have no idea what I’ll do.” Jennie shifted away and studied the sea. Her chest tensed when Meadows stole a glance at her.

“If you don’t mind me saying so, you’d make a right good doctor’s aide.”

Pleasure shot through Jennie, but she knew this was unrealistic to hope for. “No one would want me. I’d never be able to get the training I need.”

“With the needle skills you already have and your successes with healing,” he nodded toward Kate, “I daresay you could learn as an apprentice with any doctor worth his salt.”

She regarded Meadows thoughtfully. “I have no idea where or how that could ever be possible.”

Meadows said, “For sure you would not be welcome in England, lest they discover you’ve not completed your sentence.”

She calmed herself and thought about the possibilities. If news of them perishing in the shipwreck was to be leaked, she would disappear from the records. She could return to England on a different ship and pretend to be someone else. But living a lie was not what she wanted. She’d still be no closer to her family, and couldn’t put them in harm’s way for harbouring her.

“England would not be the destination I’d choose,” she said. “I’d never really be free there.”

She glanced sideways at Meadows. He shrugged. “Where you go is for you to decide. Just keep in mind that the fewer who know, the better, including me.” He patted her shoulder and walked away.

Nate joined her side. “Where you’ll go and what you’ll do once you get off the ship is a bit of problem.”

Jennie led Nate back around to talk to the other women, “We already have a few plans of our own. If they’re in agreement, we’ll tell you.”

“You tell him,” said Sarah. “The rest of us will keep away any busybodies that might overhear.”

The women scattered.

“Brilliant idea,” said Nate after Jennie filled him in on their plan to hide in convents until they could leave the island. “Though, there’s the little detail of finding convents to take all of you. I’ll see what I can do to help.”

“You will?”

‘Indeed.” Then Nat asked, “But where will you go afterwards?”

“We’d all like to head for the Province of Canada, but we’re not sure yet how we’ll get there.”

Nate touched her arm. “I’ll help you and the others find transportation, and I’ll travel there with you. I’ll make sure the captain truly won’t know which ship you leave on.”

“You’d do that for us?”

He looked at her with affection in his eyes. “Yes, I’d do that for you.” He touched her hand.

If Jennie guessed right, Nate meant not all of the women, but her in particular. She felt a ripple of happiness.

“Mind, no word must reach the English shores about my whereabouts, either.” He was serious for a moment. “I must write and resign, and there’s naught to say that they won’t consider I have deserted my
post. If that becomes the case, I may not ever be able to return to British soil.”

Jennie grasped his hand tightly.

“Don’t fret,” he said. “When I left, I had in mind that I’d not be returning home, at least not for a good long while.” He squeezed her hand again. “Besides, being exiled near you would not be such a bad thing.”

Jennie felt herself turn crimson, but she couldn’t keep a smile of delight from spreading across her face. Now that she knew she couldn’t return to England, or be with her mother and sisters, she wanted Nate to be a person she could continue to see. Along with Alice and Sarah and Kate, of course.

To calm the awkward feeling that suddenly overcame her in Nate’s presence, Jennie looked across the deck. Meadows had reached Coombs and Edwards. After a short intense conversation with them, Meadows headed back their way.

“It’s settled then,” said Meadows, as he stood against the railing next to them.

“Coombs and Edwards are on side?” asked Nate.

“Yes. They’ll stay with this crew until the end of the return voyage, unless they can find an English ship on the island heading back home. They prefer English mates.” Meadows grinned. “As far as they are concerned there were no surviving convicts on the
Emily Anne
. We agreed that all were trapped in the hold when she sank.”

Jennie nodded and Meadows strode off. Nate gave her hand a squeeze and followed.

Jennie took a couple of steps. Then she stopped short. How exactly would she and the others make it, even if Nate were there to help them? They had nothing but the rags they wore. If they pretended to be stranded passengers, she doubted anyone would take them on board to do chores in exchange for their passage. Even if that succeeded somehow, they had no way of earning money once they reached their destination. Nate wouldn’t have any way to earn money for himself, either.

“Wait!” she called to Nate. She ran over to him. “Even if we have our freedom, we have no way of paying our way for our passage or anything else afterwards. We need to think of a plan for that too.”

Nate put his arm around Jennie’s shoulder and drew her back to the railing.

“Meadows is reasonably sure we’ll find a cargo or passenger ship to provide free passage, if we all agree to go to the same destination, and if we offer to help on board.”

“Everyone has already agreed to do that, if necessary,” said Jennie, “But we have no decent clothes, and what will we do once we reach shore? I’m not sure we can walk around in nun’s habits for long, and we’ll need food and shelter.”

“Meadows and I held something back from the captain,” Nate admitted.

“You bartered extra food for ship supplies?” guessed Jennie, glancing down the full length of the ship deck. Where had they hidden these things?

He shook his head. “Not food or goods. Gold coins.”

“What?” Jennie’s face registered shock. He took her hand again.

“Meadows and I found the rest of Red Bull and Davis’ stash in the jolly boat
before
we confronted them about the theft. We kept those coins back,” he said with a trace of a smile.

“But isn’t that stealing?” Jennie’s thoughts bounced over all the things their situation had forced her to do in order to survive – lying, bribery and now stealing. What had happened to all her beliefs and convictions about truth and honour?

“We reckon we were owed wages from our work on the
Emily Anne
.”

This was true. “But then that money belongs to you and Meadows,” she said.

“We’ll keep our share, and we’ll pay Coombs and Edwards what they’re owed. And let’s just say we got a little extra for the perils we endured.” He grinned. “Although Meadows was reluctant, we’ve agreed to share in order to get you and the rest of the women somewhere safe.”

Jennie stared at him in disbelief, as he continued. “We’ll get you each a dress and some shoes,” he said. “The gold was to pay for those things when you landed in Van Diemen’s Land, in any case. If necessary, we could pay for passages to the Province.”

Jennie gasped back a sob and threw her arms around Nate. “How will we ever repay you?”

“There is no need,” he said. “It will be enough that some good has come out of these tragic circumstances. Gently he set her aside and wiped her face with a corner of his shirt.

“Thank you for giving us – me – this chance,” she said, clasping her hands. “We may all be able to live free yet.”

Nate continued with a warning. “You know getting to the Province of Canada is only the first step. I don’t know how we’ll all fare once we get there. It’s still going to be a hard row to hoe – for all of us. Who knows where we’ll end up?”

“I know,” she whispered.

“My hope is that it will be somewhere near each other.”

“It’s my hope too,” she said through blurred eyes.

He gave her a shy smile. “You’d best talk the details over with the others. I’m sure your new “mother and sister,” and your Irish “cousin” too, will want to make plans with you.”

His joke about Davis’ mistaken assumption that Sarah was her mother and Alice her sister lightened her mood further. Jennie was pleased Nate had tacked Kate on to her new family. Maybe their group could include Fanny too, if she was willing.

“Land!” Alice shouted.

Jennie joined Alice and stared at the horizon as all the women hurried over to see. Amid the chaos of shouting and clapping, Jennie glanced over at Nate. He gave her a wink.

She linked arms with Alice and Sarah and Kate and leaned over the railing looking across the sunlit, turquoise ocean, sparkling like strands of a diamond necklace.

Ahead of her beckoned a tiny lighthouse on a distant, white beach and the rest of her life stretched out before her. Wherever she ended up, she knew she would hold strong in her own convictions.

Acknowledgements

Thank you to Patricia Miller-Schroeder and my writing group members, Alison Lohans, Anne Patton and Sharon Hamilton, for your fabulous critiquing of this novel, while I was in the process of writing it. Your suggestions and edits were invaluable. Thanks to the team at Coteau Books for being as tremendous as ever in the design, layout, marketing and publishing of this historical fiction. A huge round of applause for Kathryn Cole for her expert editing skills that not only pushed my boundaries, but enriched my development as a writer.

Thanks also to Rob Ramage and Linda McDowell for sharing their sailing knowledge and setting me back on course. My apologies to them and to any and all other sailors, or would-be sailors, historians and the like for any grievous errors I’ve made, or liberties I’ve taken with the writing of the sailing and shipwreck aspects in this book.

The specific details about female convicts, their crimes and sentences are all based on true stories. Although I studied the historical details of convict ships and life on board during their voyages, not all the materials agreed on the conditions. The times of travel, the size of ships, changes in laws and regulations, and diaries of ship’s surgeons gave varied accounts, as did the illustrations available. All agreed that conditions were unbearable and heinous, often much worse than I have depicted here. Of those recorded documents, many were distorted by the hand that wrote them, in order to downplay the horror or actions in creating it.

While what I have written about the convicts is factual, and I sought to be as accurate as I could be in my interpretations of what happened to them on board the ships, there are times, such as during and after the storm, that I used a fiction author’s prerogative to interweave what I imagined might be a likely scenario to portray the story in a meaningful way.

I stand by my convictions that this story needed to be told. I believe that the history of societal injustices during the time I’ve written about is no less atrocious than the horrendous actions that we, in what we consider “civilized” countries, allow to take place against humanity today. I hope in some way the brutality of this story will awaken this and future generations to stop these monstrous cruelties against people
throughout the world, regardless of their cultures, beliefs and personal convictions.

About the Author

Darlene Galandie

Judith Silverthorne
is a multiple-award-winning Canadian
author of more than a dozen books, many of which are children's novels, with one translated into Japanese, plus two adult non-fiction biographies. Her first picture book, published in 2015, is an international award winner.
Convictions
is her first Young Adult novel.

The love of nature, people and history inspire Judith Silverthorne’s writing and help shape many of her books. Saskatchewan-based, she travels the world acquiring knowledge of cultures and societies, exploring mysteries, experiencing significant events, and the everyday lives of people, which she weaves into her numerous stories.

As a freelance writer and journalist, Judith has written several hundred articles and columns for newspapers and magazines. Among other writing professions, she has also worked as an editor, researcher, manuscript evaluator,
scriptwriter, television
documentary producer and arts administrator. In addition, Judith
teaches writing classes, and has presented hundreds of readings and writing workshops at libraries, schools and other educational institutions. She has also given presentations at conferences and literary festivals.