Crazy in Paradise (12 page)

“I’m an architect.” He made some sort of sound I assumed was laughter. “I designed Jean’s new house that is being built out on Fisher Island.”

“Sounds interesting.” I wondered what my mother had told him. “You’ll have to tell me about yourself.” My plan was to keep him talking, eat quickly, and get out of here.

The waitress came to take our orders and asked if we wanted more drinks.

“No thank you, we’ve had enough,” Connor spoke up, then turned to me. “I don’t believe in drinking. I make an exception when I’m out to dinner, and limit myself to one. I don’t keep alcohol at home.”

It irritated me he didn’t ask me what I wanted, and made my decision for me. “How do you feel about smoking?”

“You don’t smoke, do you? That’s another nasty habit.”

“My mother does,” I baited.

“Your mother and I had a long talk about her smoking. On my advice, she got the patch. It’s helped her to stop,” he said, obviously pleased with himself.

If I’d had liquid in my mouth I’d have spit it all over the table. No wonder my mother practically ran out of the restaurant. She needed a cigar. Give up smoking? She might hoodwink this pompous ass, but not me.

“So you’re an architect. Do you live and work in the Miami area?” I held onto my wrist so I wouldn’t be tempted to check the time.

“I live in Coral Gables, not far from your mother. But I also own some undeveloped waterfront property here in The Cove.”

“Are you designing a house for yourself?”

“No, I’m planning a condominium and shopping mall complex.”

“A shopping mall? Condos? In Tarpon Cove?” I was horrified. “Your plans would change the community forever. We’d lose our small beach town charm.”

“Every parcel of land should be built to meet a highest and best use standard,” he pointed out. “I think Tarpon Cove is ripe for updating.” He talked like a true outsider, with revenue being his only interest.

“When are you starting this project?” “I still need to acquire a couple more parcels of land, but final plans are at the city planning commission, awaiting approval. The project has some stumbling blocks, but no one can stop progress forever.”

What an ass
, I thought. His ambitious idea would strip all the character from The Cove, and create another beach town full of second homes. I hoped the commission would never approve the plans. “I’m very surprised.”

“This is all about the best use of my investment dollar,” Connor smiled smugly as the waitress brought our food.

“I should’ve ordered for you,” he said, staring at my plate. “The shrimp is so high in cholesterol. Wasn’t there a brown rice substitution? An order of double vegetables would have been a healthier choice.”

“Thanks for the tip.” I wanted to tell him that the double vegetables would ruin my order of cholesterol. “I eat what I want when I go out to dinner.”

“You’re in pretty good shape.” He didn’t sound as if he believed what he said. “I hoped that wouldn’t be an exaggeration on your mother’s part. I work out every day. A person who lets themself go lacks discipline. You should work out with me sometime. I can get you in much better shape.”

I don’t work out in the traditional sense, but I swim and bike, and make it a habit to steer clear of a real gym. “Next time I’m at my mother’s, the three of us should work out together. She loves to exercise,” I said, knowing how she hated exercise. As much as I would love to get back at her, by insisting she go to the gym, a second anything with this idiot would never happen.

“In fact, I think bad habits, in general, are just a lack of discipline,” he went on.

“What are you talking about?” This conversation was exhausting.

“I set strict standards for myself and I would expect my girlfriend to do the same.”

Girlfriend
? We’re two strangers sitting here having dinner.

“You should be well groomed and in appropriate attire, too. I like your dress but the color is a bit bold, and you need shoulder straps or a sweater.”

“A sweater? It’s nine hundred degrees outside!”

“I did say I liked your dress,” he smiled. “I’d also insist on punctuality. And no vulgar language.”

“Those are a lot of rules.” Just how well did Connor Manning know my mother, who smoked, drank Jack straight up, was usually late, and freely used the “f” word?

“Your mother assured me you could be the woman I’m looking for, and that we share the same values.”

“What happens if the rules are broken?” This had gone far enough. I refused to call it a first date. He totally creeped me out.

“One or two reminders would be sufficient.” Anger briefly crossed his face. “We wouldn’t want to disappoint one another.”

Now I was beginning to feel afraid. I would make a point of never being alone with him. It was time for me to make my escape.

An expression of disapproval crossed Connor’s face. I turned in my chair, and big, gorgeous Zach stood behind me. Wearing navy silk shorts and a tropical shirt, he looked like an advertisement for Tommy Bahama. A short beard made him seem more ferocious than usual. I flushed, remembering our night together. I got aroused just looking at him.

“Hi,” I gave him a big smile. I wanted to talk to him, ask questions, but not in front of Connor.

“Madison,” Zach said, leaning to kiss me. He stood next to me, his fingers pulling my hair from the clip, and exchanged hellos with Connor.

“Are you two friends?” I asked.

“Not exactly,” Zach said. “I’d join you, but I’m here on business. I’ll call you later.” He walked away.

I wanted to scream, ‘come back!’.

“How do you know Zach Lazarro?” Conner asked, his face turning red with anger.

“He’s a family friend,” I told him.

“He’s a criminal. You need to end any association with him.”

“You don’t get to pick my friends.”

“I’ll speak to your mother. When I explain to her the kind of man Zach is, she’ll encourage you to make the right decision.”

“No, you will not.” Now was the time to execute my plan for an early exit, go to the bathroom and pretend to get sick. The threat of vomit always makes a man run.

“I don’t mean to upset you.” He backed down slightly. “I just thought you should be aware of his bad reputation, one you wouldn’t want to be associated with.” Connor’s cell rang. “Excuse me, but I need to take this.” He stepped away from the table and went out to the patio.

Maybe he’ll come back, and say
he’s
sick. I couldn’t get that lucky, could I? I realized we hadn’t shared a single joke. Whatever the sound was he had made earlier wasn’t a laugh.

“Why would you go out with him?” Zach asked, returning to the table, pulling up a chair and sitting down.

“This is your fault,” I said.

“Mine?” He was clearly amused.

“We didn’t get married and have children fast enough for my mother. She sets me up without telling me…to
that
.”

Zach threw his head back and laughed. “Ah, Madeline. She’s something, isn’t she?”

“That’s one way to put it. I don’t mean to be rude, but you need to leave now, before he gets back. I’m planning my exit strategy.”

“Be careful. I miss you.” He ran his finger across my lips. “Manning has a nasty temper. If you need help, I’m sitting right over by the far window. If he touches you, I’ll break his arm and shove it up his butt.”

“That’s so sweet,” I laughed. “Go. Don’t worry about me.”

Zach pushed back his chair and stood up. “We’re here if you need us. Soon,” he whispered in my ear and kissed me.

We
? I glanced around. Axe was sitting at the bar. He waved and smiled back. Why would Zach be in the restaurant, and leave Axe at the bar? What were those two doing?

Connor returned to the table. “Sorry for the interruption.”

“Excuse me,” I said. “I’ll be right back.” I walked in the direction of the restrooms, taking a detour through the middle of the bar.

“Hey, Axe.” I smiled without stopping. “Are you the Calvary?”

“Yes, Ma’am,” he smiled back.

On my return, I went back through the bar. “Hey Axe, call me on my cell when I get back to the table.”

Sure enough, just as I sat down, my phone began ringing. “I’m not sure what you want me to say, but I’ll go along with it,” Axe said.

“You’re not interrupting. Is there a problem?”

“What are you doing with an asshole like Manning?” Axe asked.

“I’m glad you called. Don’t worry. I’ll take care of it. Thanks for calling.” Plan B would be easier than Plan A.

“Is there a problem?”

“Something’s come up at a property I own, and I need to take care of it.”

“I can go with you. You shouldn’t be going out in the evening by yourself.”

Can you say control freak
? “That won’t be necessary. I can take care of this myself.” I stood up from the table. “Thank you for dinner.”

“I’ll walk you out. I got your phone number from your mother. I’ll be calling you soon,” he informed me. “I look forward to our next date.”

Except that there would be no more dates. I was leaving here without making a scene, and that made me happy.

I noticed Axe had followed us to the parking lot. He stood a couple of cars away, watching. As I drove out, I rolled down the passenger’s window and waved.

Chapter 16

I looked everywhere as my phone kept ringing. One of those ‘unknown caller’ numbers appeared on the screen. “Hello?”

“Madison, it’s Joseph. I need a favor right now.” He sounded frantic.

“What’s the favor?”

“I was just released from Monroe County jail, and I need a ride home. I’m standing outside at the pay phone. My only option is to walk if you can’t come get me.”

“I’ll be right there. Where will you be?”

“Out in front of the jail is a bus stop. I’ll be sitting on the bench.”

This night would go on record as being one of the weirdest ever.

Twenty minutes later, I pulled up in front of the jail and there was Joseph, a lone figure sitting at the bus stop. The sign said that the bus had stopped running hours ago. I powered down the window. “Hop in.”

“Thanks for coming and getting me. It’s a long walk,” he said, opening the door. “I would’ve slept in the bushes and hitched a ride in the morning.”

Joseph was pale. His ankles were more swollen than I had ever seen them. “How did you end up in jail?”

“Drunk in public. I was walking home from the Back Room Bar and, less than a block away, the sheriff pulled up.”

“Why would they do that? Don’t they all know you?”

“Yeah, but they’re still pissed off about before.”

“Before?”

“I got popped for DUI, and not having registration or tags. I claimed bad health and got a shortened sentence. They gave me probation and revoked my license. The cops know if they charged me with drunk in public I’d also get charged with VOP.”

“Won’t a violation of probation get you sent to jail?”

“Probably not. My probation officer is a good guy. He’s a vet, too.”

“I don’t want to lecture but, Joseph, a DUI is not cool.”

I pulled into the driveway of The Cottages, where several people were milling around, drinking beer. I stopped in front of Joseph’s door. “What’s happened to your car?”

“The one I got arrested in wasn’t actually mine. It was sort of borrowed. The police towed it to impound. No one will ever make a claim. Too much paperwork and too many questions.”

I smiled at Joseph, amused by his explanation.

“Thanks for the ride,” Joseph said, getting out of the car.

“Stay out of trouble.” I backed out of the space, and the people who had been hanging around had disappeared; vanished like roaches when the lights go on.

I screamed and turned at a banging sound on the passenger side window, to find Will standing there. “What?” I shouted through the closed window.

“Why are you here? Is there a problem?” He motioned for me to roll down the window, which I reluctantly did.

“No problem. I saw Joseph walking and gave him a ride.”

“Joseph is trouble.”

“He has a few problems, but who doesn’t? Do I need to remind you he’s lived here a long time; one of my aunt’s first tenants?”

“He either gets his act together or he can find a new place to live.”

“I don’t know what problems you’re referring to and I don’t care. You will
not
evict Joseph.”

“Do you need to be reminded that I’m in charge? He gets drunk and starts fights. It would be in everyone’s best interest if he moved.”

“So what? He doesn’t start them here. Leave him alone. It’s none of your business.” I rolled up the window.

“I can’t believe you said that!” he yelled.

At the end of the driveway, someone appeared to be lying in the bushes. Who is that? Miss January?

I parked, got out, walked over to her, and called her name a couple of times. She moaned, drunk. “At least she’s not dead,” I mumbled to myself.

Up the driveway, Will stood staring at me, hands on his hips. “Now what?” he called.

He certainly acted as if he had no job security worries. His attitude was hard to take. He didn’t bother to hide his contempt.

“Miss January has fallen into the bushes.”

“She’s another big problem, nothing more than a damn drunk.”

“Will you help me get her on her feet and back to her place?”

“Are you out of your mind? I’m not touching her drunk ass. Do you think this is the first time she’s spent the night in the bushes?”

“I can’t leave her here.”

“That’s up to you. This is another ongoing problem that could be eliminated if she moved out.”

“Stop with all the threats. Do you plan to evict everyone?”

“How about I turn the property over to drunks and drug addicts?” he shot back.

“Need some help, Miss Madison?”

“Hello, Mr. Spoon.” I smiled. He had appeared out of nowhere, dressed in an expensive black silk suit, with a diamond in his ear lobe bigger than anything I or anyone else I knew owned.

He took my hands in his, pulled me to him and kissed my cheek. “Just call me, Spoon, remember?”

“Yes, I need help.”