Dangerous in Love - Dangerous Davies 02 (17 page)

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Authors: Leslie Thomas

Tags: #Humour, #Crime

BOOK: Dangerous in Love - Dangerous Davies 02
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'Detective Constable
...
oh Christ .
..
this wind! I'M THE POLICE!' For a moment he thought he had communicated because the big old man looked towards Bert, the lines in his face even deeper. But the face then returned to Davies.

'POLICE!' bellowed Davies again into the howling wind.

'He's deaf,' said Bert in an almost normal voice which he seemed able to slot between gusts. 'Been deaf for years.'

Davies thought he was going to fall backwards into the mud. He looked aghast at the puckered Bert. 'Deaf?' he howled. 'Bloody hell, why didn't you tell me?'

'You didn't ask,' shouted Bert, a little shamefaced. He regarded Old Tommy, who examined the contents of his lugworm bucket, and then summed up the dimming horizon. 'Get him ashore,' he suggested. 'Ask him on shore. Got a fiver?'

'Yes
...
what for?'

'Wave a fiver at him.'

'Oh
...
I see. All right. Christ, what a performance!' Swaying in the mud he managed to extract a five-pound note from his wallet. As he held it out speculatively so the wind, apparently having been lying in wait, gusted and tore the blue note from his fingers. Davies cried out and Bert watched expressionless as it flew off across the mud. 'Bugger it!' exploded Davies.

'There it is

pointed out Bert. 'Miles away.' He looked up with a creeping sympathy. 'Won't get that back now.'

Old Tommy, apparently not having witnessed the drama, finished counting the worms in his bucket. He straightened up, picked up the spade and the receptacle and, with no word nor gesture to them, began plodding back towards the murky shore-line. Bert jerked his head at Davies and followed. Davies turned, weary and defeated, and became the tail of the short, slow, homeward crocodile. The wind was at his back now, pushing at him like someone overdoing encouragement. He stepped carefully, resisting the force of the gusts, and was thinking that at least he was becoming more skilled when, negotiating a screed of bare rock and slimy gullies, he became unbalanced and an opportunist blast between his shoulder blades sent him sprawling forward. He fell on his knees in the icy ooze, his arms sinking to the elbows. His cry caused Bert to turn casually, but the little man made no effort to return although he waited. He watched stonily as Davies unplugged his arms and with anger and anguish eventually contrived to regain his feet.

'Looks like Old Tommy's spotted your fiver

Bert told him chattily when he had caught up. 'Look, 'e's off over there.'

The bait-digger had taken a diversion and was youthfully stepping across inlets and flats. He bent and picked up the five-pound note which was floating in a pool, hugging a wall of rock like a sheltering ship. In almost the same movement, he thrust the note into his pocket before continuing his progress towards the land.

Bert said philosophically: 'Being deaf 'e's 'ard to argue with.'

He continued carefully across the mud, the policeman miserably in his wake. Dusk and tide were both advancing. Water began to slide about their waders. Davies looked towards the dim shelter on the shore. Mod could just be discerned. There were two other figures with him. Old Tommy had already gained the grass and Bert was almost there. As Davies got closer, he saw that the shapes flanking Mod were uniformed policemen. It was difficult for his heart to sink further. Slowly, he progressed towards them, the surface beneath his waders becoming firmer. There was a police car standing outside the pub with the driver reporting his arrival over the radio.

He was icy, wet, bruised and coated with grey slime. He felt he could scarcely stagger another step. His teeth clattered. Old Tommy had taken his bucket in the direction of the last of the daylight. Bert walked away into the anonymous gloom. One of the policemen sitting on either side of Mod arose and ambled towards him. He was a sergeant.

'Good afternoon, sir,' he said. 'Been digging for bait?'

From within his coating of mud, Davies regarded the man with true hatred. His arms and legs felt like frozen wood. 'No

he said bitterly. 'I've just walked from fucking Denmark.'

12

'Anyone

sighed Inspector Joliffe of Essex Constabulary, 'who lets himself in for arranging police balls must be mad

His arms were folded on his desk and he looked sombrely and directly at Davies, as though confident he would find sympathy. After some initial surprise, Davies was swift to offer it.

'Exactly my sentiments, sir,' he said. 'Coppers are apt to get disgruntled.'

'It was last night,' groaned Joliffe. 'Southend. And it's the final one for me. I can tell you how bloody relieved I was when they played the last waltz. Last straw more like it. Half the raffle prizes were stolen, the band was terrible, and one of the wives hit a woman PC on the jaw.'

Davies moved his head sympathetically. 'They can get rough. We've had to call the police before now.'

'We don't
have
to call them, they're waiting outside with the breathalysers,' complained Joliffe. 'Those who didn't want to go to the ball, spoiling it for others.' He bumped his forearms forlornly on the desk.

Davies said: 'You're quite right, sir. "Blow into this - and it's not a bag of chips." We've got them as well.'

The inspector shook his head and withdrew his arms from the desk. The action seemed to remind him that he was there to interrogate Davies. 'Well, what's all this then?' he asked. He picked up a written report and held it at a distance from his eyes, blocking Davies's view of him. 'Talk about coppers turning on their own,' he said from behind the paper barrier. 'We've had to bring you in.' The report sheet was lowered. The eyes were troubled. 'What's it all about then?'

'Inquiries,' answered Davies inadequately.

'Inquiries?' said Joliffe, his voice firmer. 'But you can't just come down here on
inquiries.
Not just like that. There's channels. We can't have the Metropolitan Police making investigations in Essex, in our manor, our patch, with not so much as a by-your-leave. You know about permissions and suchlike.'

'Yes, sir, of course,' said Davies dolefully.

'Who knows where it would stop? There's the old man in the hotel at Frinton, Mr Linder. You tell him you're the police but he sees you drive off in a beat-up old heap that obviously isn't a police vehicle. So he telephones us. Have you got a current MOT certificate, by the way?'

'Oh yes, I have,' said Davies. 'Somewhere.'

Joliffe wrote something in the margin of the report sheet. 'You'd better produce it,' he murmured. 'And your driving licence and insurance at your nearest police station.'

'Right. Of course. I'll take it in when I'm next working,' said Davies. 'I should be on duty this morning. I've had to phone. That's why I wanted to get the matter sorted out yesterday.' He realized he was adopting the chummy attitude of the petty criminal when cornered. 'Incidentally

he mentioned. 'I know a friend of Max Bygraves. When you have the police ball next year
..
.'

Joliffe looked up and regarded Davies carefully. 'Max Bygraves?' he said. 'Max Bygraves wouldn't come here, would he? You mean, if you asked him?'

'He might,' muttered Davies half-encouragingly. 'You never know with these people. Like, if he was on his way to somewhere else.'

'There
is
nowhere else out here,' said Joliffe, looking at the divisional map on the wall apparently to make sure. 'Only Ipswich. And he's hardly likely to be going to Ipswich, is he? Ipswich apart, all there is after here is mud.'

'I know,' said Davies feelingly. 'I've been stuck in it.'

'Ah yes. They were having a laugh about that at the ball last night.' He examined Davies, apparently for signs of slime. 'But they helped you to get cleaned up.'

'Oh yes. They were very decent,' said Davies. 'And they victualled you.'

'Yes. And they put me up in the section house. The cells were probably full.'

'Yes, yes. We're not a bad bunch really in this division,' said Joliffe. 'The ball brings out the worst I always think.' He sighed ponderously. 'Unfortunately this
...'
Regretfully he tapped the sheet of paper, has now gone into the works, the gubbins. Into the computer. And you know as well as I do what that means - there's no retrieving it. You could bring The Rolling Stones to Chelmsford, and we still couldn't get you off. Once it's in the gubbins, it's in the gubbins for good.'

'It's going to be difficult for me,' admitted Davies.

'What were you up to, anyway? Whatever it was, you weren't very quiet over it. After alarming the old boy at Frinton, you go to the pub at Purwell-by-Sea and tell them you're coppers. The landlord rang us as well.'

'He hired me his waders,' said Davies bitterly.

'Why did you want to go out on the mud?'

'To see the old man digging bait. There were some questions I wanted to ask him. He turned out to be stone-deaf.'

'What sort of questions? What's the background?'

The inquiries are about a man called Lofty Brock

said Davies. 'Although that wasn't his real name. And he's dead now anyway. He was drowned in a canal

Joliffe twirled his pencil as if the story were all too familiar. 'Why didn't you do the proper thing then, go through channels?' he asked.
'We
could have made the inquiries. We
can
ask questions, you know, just as well as the Metropolitan Police.'

'It wasn't official,' Davies admitted in a low voice. 'It was a personal sort of investigation.'

'Oh, I see,' said Joliffe, shaking his head. 'On your tod, was it? That's a bit frowned on. It would be here.'

'Yes

nodded Davies glumly. 'It's frowned on.'

'And you went to Purwell to ask about this man Brock, who's dead?'

'Yes. A family called Prenderley. I thought the old man, Old Tommy, might know them.'

'He ought to

said Joliffe. 'He's one of them.'

Staring at the rainy road ahead from behind the Vanguard's massive wheel, Davies once more began to mutter bitterly. 'He was
one
of them. The old deaf bastard was a
Prenderley.
Why didn't they say so in the pub? They must be as thick as the mud they bloody well
live
on.'

Carefully, Mod said: 'Do you remember what they
did
say, Dangerous?'

'Go on, go on. Tell me what I missed - again.'

'It's only now I think of it,' Mod said. 'When you asked about the Prenderley family in the pub there was a bit of a silence and the landlord asked the man in the corner
..
.'

'Good old Bert

said Davies, grinding his teeth.

'Exactly. And Ber
t said something about the Pren
derleys having lived at the coastguard cottages. Then the landlord said to Bert something like "Old Tommy ought to know" and Bert agreed that Old Tommy ought to. Of course, he
ought
to know - because he was
one
of them. But they weren't going to tell you everything. If Old Tommy wanted to tell you, let him tell you himself.'

'Except there was a gale blowing and he was stone-deaf,' said Dangerous.

'He's the last of the Prenderleys?'

'In that area he is. That's where they all come from. The inspector, Joliffe, told me there were still some Prenderleys living in Southend. They're a well-known local family, or they were.'

'Even notorious, perhaps. One of the girls doing time for nicking the silver.'

Davies sighed and the sigh turned into a grunt of indignation. 'And she's the one who knew the man we call Lofty Brock,' he said. 'Or did. She may be dead now.' In his exasperation he trod on the accelerator and sent the car bouncing and skidding on the soaked road.

'Steady, steady,' cautioned Mod. 'You were way above forty then.'

'Now we'll never know,' continued Davies, managing to steady the car. 'If I ever so much as put my snout in this manor again, that will be goodbye. I'm going to be in enough bother as it is.'

'What can they do to you?'

'For undermining authority? For going into another force's territory unofficially - and getting caught? And remember, we've been to Yorkshire, Hampshire and I went to Bedfordshire to see the old prison lady. For that lot I could find myself standing next to you in the queue at the DHSS. On the other hand, they might be lenient and put me back in uniform.'

Mod was shocked. 'Oh, Dangerous,' he said solemnly. 'I didn't realize it was that serious. Is there anything I can do?' 'Yes

said Davies grimly. 'Try not to laugh.'

He had tidied himself up, resolutely brushing his hair and getting out his blazer. Superintendent Vesty kept him waiting for half an hour and he sat grimly in the CID room, trying to interest himself in an old issue of the
Police Gazette.
Even that was a mockery. Everyone else seemed to be in the process of being promoted.

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