Dare To Be Wild (20 page)

“You knew?” she'd asked, feeling both embarrassed and slightly duped.

The gotcha smile on his face answered her query.

“That's why you took me on the boat?”

“And in the bathroom, though the phone sex was all about just wanting to talk dirty to you,” he admitted with a mischievous smile.

“And the woman,” Livia whispered under her breath.

“I didn't get to see it all,” Mitchell continued, not hearing her comment. “I only got as far as having sex in public.”

“How? When?”

“I saw it when I was putting things back into your purse on the beach.”

“Omigod,” she'd said, raising her hands to cover her humiliation.

“Don't,” he demanded while gently peeling her palms from her face. “I told you on the phone the other night, I love bold, sensual, fun-loving women. When I saw that list, I thought then, and still do now, that you are one sexy-as-hell woman.”

“Why didn't you tell me you'd seen it?”

“Because if I had, you'd have been too embarrassed to do with me what you had obviously come here to do,” Mitchell explained.

He'd been absolutely correct. Jellyfish sting and all, Livia would have run to the opposite end of the island if she'd known that he'd seen her list. Once again, Mitchell had read her accurately, and done her a great favor in keeping his discovery secret.

The urge to hear his voice in her ear again was overwhelming. Deciding to return to the bold woman Mitchell knew, she dialed the number, rehearsing what she would say as she waited to be
connected. She'd settled on an invitation for a sunset drink when a voice came through the phone.

“We're sorry, you have reached a number that has been disconnected or is no longer in service. Please check the number and try again.”

Surprised, Livia inspected Mitchell's handwriting. Was that a three or a five? And what she thought was a seven could actually be a one.

Liv exhaled deeply, shaking Mitchell and the recollections of their time together from her head so she could concentrate on the big picture for a moment.

This fuck-it list adventure, though initially forced on her by her friends, had started with the goal of rebooting and changing her life around for the better. It was to be a bold exercise in self-discovery, pushing away her fears and getting to know, and eventually own her sexual desires. The trip, with its comforting anonymity, had allowed her to pull things off, and had been an enlightening and productive vacation. Mitchell had helped to lift her out of her rigid and conservative ways, and change her views on passion and physical pleasure. But the truth remained: she'd scratched her itch and instead of making it go away, she'd broken out in an acute romantic rash.

It was becoming increasingly clear to Livia that one sad side effect of this escapade into Lustville was the spotlight it left shining on her extreme loneliness. Yes, she'd wanted to continue to stretch her sexual wings, but it was now glaringly apparent that she wanted to do so with someone she loved, not simply lusted after. Someone like Mitchell, but who wasn't Mitchell. And yes, it had all been about sex, but he'd never made her feel used in anyway. In fact, whether he'd intended to or not, Mitchell had made her feel like part of a couple. And feeling that way had made her realize how much she missed being one of a loving pair.

Mitchell had really shown himself to be a kind, intelligent and compassionate man. He was nurturing and supportive, didn't judge her and seemed to naturally exude an intimacy and honesty that was both refreshing and ultimately magnetic. He was also handsome and studly, but oh so damn young! A bit of a slut puppy, for sure, he was the perfect vacation boy toy, and would be the ultimate catch for some young woman.

But fast approaching fifty, Livia was no longer young, and didn't want a boy. She wanted a man whom she could call her own for the rest of her life, not just the week. A man closer to her age, one with similar life experiences, whose soundtrack to his life included songs (not just hip-hop beats) by Earth, Wind & Fire, the Isley Brothers, and Prince in his absolute prime. A grown man who didn't need to go out of the country to pick up women, one who had sown his wild oats and was ready to settle down with a fellow quinquagenarian and do some seriously energetic, albeit slightly less thrill-seeking, fucking into the sunset.

What was she thinking to even try and call? Mitchell's poor penmanship had saved her from making a huge mistake. Livia slowly tore Mitchell's number into several pieces and sprinkled it into the garbage can, picked up her pencil and got back to work on Naomi Maddox's cake. He was perfect for what ailed Quincy, but could not satisfy what Livia was craving. The decision was made: What happened in St. Bart's, how it happened, and with whom it happened, would forever stay there.

•  •  •

“It was the craziest thing,” Livia explained to her cousin and friend between bites of spinach, artichoke dip and sips of chardonnay. Finally, they'd all been able to clear their schedules to allow for this all important debriefing. Conspicuous in her absence was
Jasi, but Livia was actually grateful she wasn't there as she was more befuddled than ever when it came to how she was feeling about Jas. “He just picked up my naked behind and carried me over to my chair.”

“So exactly at what point did his dick accidently fall inside you?” Aleesa teased, setting the three of them off in gales of laughter.

“That didn't happen until a couple of days later. I needed a few days to get that damn jellyfish sting under control. But trust me when I tell you, it was no accident.” Livia took a long sip of her wine before confessing more. “There is definitely something very positive to be said about vacation sex.”

“Do tell,” her cousin prompted.

“Let's just say, you should be very proud of me. Quincy and I were very productive while I was away.”

“Enough back-patting! I want all the gory, or should I say, glory details,” Lena demanded.

“We did it in the bathroom at the restaurant,” she told them, smiling slyly into her glass.

“Omigod! Livia Charles had sex in a bathroom?”

“A public bathroom, no less,” Aleesa chimed in.

“With a stranger! Fantasies five and six, check!” Livia stated with a laugh.

“Sounds like a Quincy move to me,” Lena stated.

“Totally. And later, after he left, Mitchell called and we had phone sex. That was a bonus write-in on the list.”

“Do I even know you?” Lena laughed.

“Girl, I don't even know myself anymore! And that was just night one.”

“How many times did you two hook up?” Aleesa asked.

“Just two. The next night, on Saturday, he took me to a VIP yacht party. Now
that
was pretty crazy,” Livia admitted.

“Crazy how?”

“Well, at first it was just a regular party, but then most people disembarked and it turned into a kind of sex cruise for the VIP guests.”

“Damn, girl, you went from no-fucking on the fuck-it list to a VIP sex party? Now, that's some kind of progress.”

“You didn't put that in your text. What kind of sex cruise? Like an orgy?” Aleesa asked, alarmed by what she was hearing. Yes, she wanted her cousin to find and live her passionate side, but not to become an indiscriminate whore. Had their straight-laced Livia gone too far?

“Not exactly. I mean, if you wanted to, I'm sure you could find a willing group somewhere on the boat. The opportunity to do just about anything you wanted was there, but mainly people got it on with whomever they came with,” Livia informed them.

“So tell us what happened,” Lena requested.

“Well, it all started with the brownies,” Livia began. “They looked so appetizing and of course, I couldn't resist. It wasn't until I'd already eaten two that I found out they were space cakes.”

“Pot brownies,” Lena filled in after seeing the question marks in Aleesa's eyes.

Livia's girlfriends listened intently as she indulged their curiosity with most of what happened on the yacht. From the desserts that turned out to be drug delivery systems to the bikini-clad dancers who turned out to be ladies hired to deliver sex, Livia began to paint for them a picture of her and Mitchell's carnally rambunctious night.

“We were on the dance floor kind of bumping and grinding like a good ol' ‘blue lights in the basement' college party.”

“Kind of like that homecoming party I had where you and Bobby Jeffries were doing the vertical dry hump,” Aleesa remarked with a wink in her voice.

“Yeah,” Livia said, missing the devious looks exchanged between her friends. “And just like that party, everybody was drunk or high and the sexual energy was so thick you could put your hand through it. Between the champagne, brownies, and the depravity of it all, I was really getting turned on. At first, I was kind of scared and embarrassed, but then I realized that nobody was watching us; they were too busy getting busy on their own! But can I tell you, I shocked myself with how much I liked the scandalous feeling…”

“Was Mitchell pushing you to do all of this?” Aleesa's protective side interrupted again to find out.

“No, absolutely not. I was doing it because I felt safe
being with
him. Before everything got started, Mitchell made it very clear that this was about my fantasies and my pleasure, and we could stop at any time. He was really considerate and just—well—great.”

Amused glances and she's-so-into-him smirks were exchanged between Lena and Aleesa, as Livia continued with her account. She left out the part where she'd given Mitchell a blow job and he'd sucked her tits and finger-fucked her into a standing orgasm right on the dance floor. Some things needed to remain private.

“Well, the brownies kicked in and I was feeling really high, and ready to do the nasty right, so we went to the cabin. I was lying there blindfolded and Mitchell started kissing me, you know, down there, and then all of a sudden someone was kissing the girls.”

“Ah, shit. Now, it's getting interesting!” Lena interjected with a chuckle.

“I knew it couldn't be Mitchell, so I peeked and saw this really attractive woman…she was stunning…kinda looked like Zoe Saldana…well, she took my boob out of her mouth and announced that she was here to give me a massage. I surprised even myself by not freaking out. I let it happen. It felt good and, honestly, I guess
I was too messed up at that point to care who was doling out the feel-goods.”

With two sets of eyebrows raised, Lena and Aleesa looked at each other with an omigod-can-you-believe-this-shit look on their faces. Apparently, leaving home to do her dirty dealing had freed up all kinds of pent-up wantonness in little Miss Livia.

Undeterred by the shock on their faces, Livia continued to reveal the activities of her once in a lifetime adventure. She revealed to her friends how much she found herself getting into the girl-on-girl massage. It had been so soft and sensual, and nothing like she'd ever experienced before.

“I let her do her thing. But I wasn't messed up enough to actually have sex with her,” Livia added, feeling the need to defend and qualify her actions. “For the most part, I let her touch my body, but Mitchell was the only one kissing me or taking care of Quincy.”

“For the most part?” Lena, catching her telling remark, stopped Livia to ask.

Liv paused, quickly debating if she should tell the whole truth. Secure in the knowledge that she would not be judged, and hoping for some clarity, she decided to reveal the entire story. She told Lena and Aleesa how Shana had dripped warm oil on her tits and rubbed it into her chest, belly and nether regions. How she had surprised her by slipping her tongue into her mouth and giving her a slow, teasing kiss that matched the stroke of her hand between her legs, and how the whole thing was driving her snatch crazy with want.

“So naturally, I asked them to stop,” Liv revealed.

“Why? It sounds like you were enjoying yourself,” Lena commented.

“I was, well, my body was, but I felt like I was crossing too many
boundaries. It didn't feel…you know…right. I wanted sex the old-fashioned way—dick in coochie. One man, one woman.”

“Well, I'm glad you let yourself enjoy the experience,” Aleesa told her.

“And learned the lesson that a tongue is a tongue.”

“I'd never have done it sober, but it did kind of satisfy a curiosity. I'm like you, Lees, what did you call it? Strictly dickly.”

“Like we told you before, curiosity doesn't make you gay. But, hell, even if you found that out that you were, who gives a damn?! We'd still love you anyway,” Aleesa reassured her.

“Who you fuck says more about who you are than what body parts you use to fuck them with,” Lena added.

Livia took a long sip of wine followed by a mouthful of calamari. She wanted to keep her mouth full so she could think instead of talk.
We'd love you anyway.
Aleesa's words buzzed through her head. If these two could think that about her, shouldn't she be a big enough, loving enough, a loyal enough friend to feel the same about Jasi?

“So speaking of being strictly dickly, this Mitchell, where does he live?” Lena probed with a smile.

“I don't know, but he works for some hedge fund in New York.”

“Omigod! Lucky you! Handsome, hot, and local. It's like you ordered him from a catalog,” Aleesa added. “He sounds perfect. When are you going to see him again?”

“You are going to see him again, aren't you?” Lena pressed, reading the look on Livia's face.

“No. I never gave him my number, and I threw away his, so that's that.” Livia looked at both of their faces, perplexed by their obvious disbelief. “He's too young.”

“There you go with that too young crap again,” her cousin responded.
“What do you have against attractive young men who are obviously attracted to you?”