Dare to Desire (23 page)

Franny blew out a long breath. “He’s got a mean streak. You can’t let him stop you from seeing your man, Gracie. You know that, right?”

And just like that, it was over. Madison teared up all over again.

“I know.” She managed to pull herself together and decided to say everything she would have said to a lucid Franny. “I would do it all again to help you the way you helped me. I did everything I could for you.”

Franny clasped her hand and began to hum a tune Madison didn’t recognize. “Remember that song? We’d sing it when I was waiting for Daniel and you were waiting for your man. Are you waiting for him now?”

“I don’t know. Maybe I’ll go see where he is,” Madison said.

“That’s a good idea.”

Madison looked at Franny. “Thank you for everything. But most of all, thank you for being the only real mother I ever had,” she said, pulling the frail woman into a long hug.

“That’s my girl,” she thought she heard Franny whisper.

Or maybe she’d imagined it. It didn’t matter.

She was Franny’s girl, Madison thought. From the moment the couple had taken her in, they’d treated her like their own daughter. It didn’t matter what Eric thought or what the court said. She was Franny’s daughter of the heart. And that was the only thing that mattered.

Madison shook her head. “I don’t know if he’s my man.”

But she did. In her heart, where it counted, Alex was hers. Madison decided it was time to go home and deal with her real life. The one that existed in this moment.

And if that meant she had to live with whatever career choices made him happy, wasn’t that a small price to pay? She didn’t have to like it, but she did have to live with it. Up till now, he’d done all the changing and giving. It was her turn.

*     *     *

Alex was getting good and worked up, pacing Madison’s apartment and glaring out the window. By the time her car pulled into her assigned parking spot, he was out of his mind worried, not knowing where she’d gone after getting the bad news, and she hadn’t returned his texts or his calls.

When she put the key in the lock and walked in, he was waiting in the living room, back to the window, arms folded over his chest. “Well, it’s about damned time.”

“Excuse me?” She blinked, her eyes puffy and red from crying. The sight hurt, but he was still furious she’d left him hanging without a word.

“Do you have any idea how worried I was?”

She shook her head. “I thought you were calling and texting from New York, not Florida. How would I know you were home? And if anyone was left hanging, it was me. Where the hell were you for the last twenty-four hours? You didn’t pick up the phone and text or call!” She tossed her keys and purse onto the table and folded her arms across her chest, mimicking his pose … and calling him on his hypocritical bullshit.

“Madison—”

“And while we’re at it, tell me why I had to see those photographs and still not hear a word from you.”

“I can explain everything,” he said, his heart racing as he remembered everything between them he’d put aside during his concern for her after the hearing.

“The words of a guilty man if I ever heard them,” she said, but she didn’t look angry.

He was confused by her mixed signals. She strode over to him and grasped him by the shoulders. She was slight but determined as she turned and backed him over to the sofa, pushing him into the couch cushions.

“What do you think you’re doing?” he asked.

“Having my say.”

He narrowed his gaze. He’d never seen this side of Madison before, and he had to admit it was hot. Still, there was a lot between them that needed stating out loud and fixing.

“Any chance I can go first? Explain what happened in New York?” he asked.

“Nope.” She straddled him and settled into his lap, facing him.

“How about the hearing? Can we talk about that?”

“Eventually.”

He blew out a long breath and eased back against the couch, settling in. He figured he’d be here a while. “Go.”

“Yeah.” She let out a nervous laugh. “I wish it were that easy or simple.” She ran a shaking hand through her hair. “I just went to visit Franny. I thought if Eric has his way, it might be the last time, so I wanted to make sure I said everything I could think of. Whether or not she could hear or understand.”

His heart twisted for her. And this time, he didn’t offer her platitudes, because as she’d learned today, it didn’t matter what
should
happen, a judge could rule any way he wanted. Fairness be damned.

“While I was talking to her, she thought I was her sister Gracie … and she was happy. She was in the past and reliving her life, and she laughed and smiled. I thought,
I need to accept that at least she’s happy where she is at this moment
. That has to be enough for me. It’s certainly enough for her right now.”

He smoothed his hand over her hair. “That’s huge for you. I’m glad you’re finding a way to come to terms with losing her.” Because loss was the one thing Madison feared.

“She’s not gone. The woman I knew is gone, but another one is here. And you know what? She taught me something today.”

Alex caught the twinkle in her eye, and he suddenly had more hope than he’d experienced since seeing her in Ian’s conference room that first day.

“What’s that?” he asked.

She met his gaze. “Living in the moment has to count. It has to be everything, or I’ll have nothing, like you said. It just took seeing Franny happy today to make me realize it.”

He waited, sensing she needed to keep going, and he remained silent.

“You’re right. I’ve had a lot of loss. Too much. But here you are, offering me everything in the moment, and I’m so busy worrying about the future that I’m pushing you away. When I could be happy now.
We
could be happy now.”

His head began to spin with the possibilities of what she was saying. “So—”

“So…” She drew a deep breath. “I’m here. I’m all in. And now I want to know what the hell you think you were doing with that blonde in New York.”

He couldn’t help it. He threw his head back and laughed.

She poked him in the stomach with her finger. “Cut that out.”

“I was set up.” He raised both hands in front of him before she could argue. “I kid you not. My bastard of an agent decided to ambush me with meeting after meeting. He told me this was a test for the job when, in reality, they just wanted to get good publicity shots for the show. He basically told them I’d take the job without my permission. And last night at the restaurant, Allison was in on it. The damned restaurant was loud, she moved in closer. She knew someone was snapping pictures. I didn’t.”

Madison eyed him, eyes narrowed.

“What? You don’t believe me?”

“Of course I believe you. I just can’t believe your agent would do something like that to you.”

That she trusted his word was huge, and hearing her say it, relief flooded him. “Ex-agent. I fired him as soon as I landed. And I couldn’t call you last night or this morning because it was after midnight when I got back to the hotel, and I was up at four for a six a.m. flight.”

She nodded. “I didn’t like it, but I didn’t jump to conclusions. But I was going to call it quits between us.”

His gut clenched, and this time, he narrowed his gaze.

“I didn’t think I could handle this kind of publicity and the women in your life, waiting for the other shoe to fall and you to decide you were finished with me again.”

“Madison,” he said on a low growl.

She placed her finger over his lips. “But I realized I can’t live waiting to be miserable. That will happen—or it won’t. But I need you in my life, and that means getting over my past and my fears.”

“I’m here to help you, Angel.”

She smiled, but it was far from genuine. “I’m broken, Alex,” she said with tears in her eyes. “But I want to get better. I want to get it right with you.”

He slid his hand behind her neck and pulled her hair tight. “Let’s get one thing straight, okay? There are no other women in my life. None who matter. Want to know why?”

She nodded, staring at him with wide eyes.

“Because I love you. I. Love. You.” He said the three words he’d only said to one other woman before, when he’d been nothing more than a kid who didn’t know better. He hadn’t known what life had in store. Couldn’t imagine that this wounded woman who needed him would find a place so deep in his heart he could never let her go.

Madison’s breath caught, and a sob escaped. “I love you too.” Her throat hurt from holding back tears, but her heart … that she thought might burst out of her chest.

Those three words meant everything to her. Hours earlier, they might not have been enough to ground her and keep her from leaving. She might not have trusted them. But time with a wise woman who’d lost herself had managed to teach Madison the one lesson she’d desperately needed.

“I love you,” she said, wrapping her arms around his neck and pressing her lips to his.

He kissed her back, devouring her mouth, sealing them together deeply. “You’re not getting rid of me, Madison,” he promised, separating from her only to pull her against him tightly.

Her cheek rested against his, and she breathed him in. “Whatever happens with the job, we’ll make it work. Don’t give anything up for me. I promise you, I’m not going anywhere. I know I’ll struggle, but I’ll work through it.”

“No more pulling away? No more giving into fear, right? You have a problem, we talk it out.”

She nodded.

“Good. Because I want to give you everything you’ve never had. Love, trust, a home…”

Another sob rose up in her throat at his words.

“And a family.”

She smiled at him. “You already did. Your family accepted me, and I’m so grateful for that.”

He pressed his forehead to hers. “I don’t mean just
my
family. I mean our family. Yours and mine. I want kids I can teach to throw a baseball and girls who look just like you.”

She shook her head back and forth, unable to speak or form a coherent word.

“You don’t want kids?” He reared back in shock.

“I do. I just never let myself think about having them. I didn’t ever allow myself that dream.”

“Well, it’s not going to be a dream. It’s going to be our reality. I’m going to make sure of it.”

“You’re so good to me.” She looked into the face of the man she loved, unable to believe life had given them a second chance. Had given her a chance to get her head on straight and not lose the best thing that had ever happened to her.

“We’re good together. Don’t forget that.”

She grinned. “You can be sure I’ll remind you … if you ever forget.”

“Not likely. Got a question for you now.”

She raised an eyebrow.

“Marry me. Make this official.”

She blinked at him, stunned, surprised, and overwhelmed. “Are you sure you know what you’re getting into?”

“What kind of question is that? For one thing, we belong together. For another, don’t you think you’ll feel better knowing I want to make a lifetime commitment to you?”

She shook her head. “No. You can’t marry me because I have abandonment issues.”

He cupped her face in his hand, stroking her cheek with his thumb. “You’re right. But I can marry you because
I
have issues with being apart from you in any way. And because I know how I feel. It’s a plus that it’ll give you even more security. And that’s important to me. But binding you to me in every way is exactly what I want.”

She shrugged. What else could she say to that? “Yes.”

“Yes?”

“Yes.”

He grinned and kissed her hard. “Let’s go.”

“Where?”

“To buy a ring. My fiancée needs to have my ring on her finger.”

She smiled. “What kind of female would I be if I said no to that?”

She didn’t kid herself that things would be easy or that she wouldn’t backslide, but she had the world in her hands and this wonderful man in her life. She’d do everything she could to keep him there. Including fix herself.

*     *     *

Three Months Later

Alex drove toward Ian’s house to join his brother at the end of Riley’s baby shower. Ian had asked for moral support, and this way, Alex could pick up Madison, who’d gone to the party with some women from work. Alex drove north on I-95, catching sight of the damned billboard with his face plastered there in split screen. Exactly as the PR people had pitched the idea months ago.

He really hadn’t wanted to go along with the idea, but a myriad of circumstances had changed his mind. First was Jake, the boy he’d met in New York. They’d become email pals, and at some point, Ian’s words about Alex being able to make a difference for kids, and even injured athletes who could be taught to prepare for the future, had gotten to him. And when training camps began over the summer, Alex had begun meeting with the players, both in groups and individually, and he’d come to see the wisdom of the PR campaign. Finally, there was his new TV gig.

When Rachel had called him months ago on behalf of the owners of S&E Network, he hadn’t wanted to hear what she had to say. Once again, her persistence had paid off, and he’d been forced to listen. He learned that the setup had been all Allison and his ex-agent’s idea. The executives still wanted Alex. He wanted a new cohost. To his shock, they were agreeable.

The show would be Sundays only during football season, which meant his travel time was limited. He was able to keep his job with the Thunder and take on the new opportunity. That was when Madison had approached him again about doing the PR campaign. She believed the new job would be the perfect comeback tool and would bolster the efforts they were doing behind the scenes if coordinated with a public campaign. With Alex as the face of success.

Put like that, he hadn’t been able to refuse. If Madison could face her insecurities while he traveled to New York and worked with his female cohost and renewed fame, he could damn well face his own insecurities. Especially if it meant helping others.

Alex pulled his Porsche into the long driveway of his brother’s house. He met up with Ian at the front door.