Dark Side of Dawn: The Nightmare Chronicles (19 page)

I just couldn’t bear the thought of something happening to him because of me. When I thought of what Karatos had done to him, how the Terror had robbed him of his ability to dream…it made me feel sick. But it was even worse thinking that I might never see him again.

I felt much better about things when Antwoine and I parted company. I walked back to the office, grabbing
a coffee on the way. Yes, I drink way too much of the stuff, so sue me. I don’t smoke and I gave up potato chips a year ago. Other than makeup it is my one vice and I like it. So there.

Inside my pretty little space, I hung up my coat and took my phone from my purse once more. Before I could chicken out, I speed-dialed Noah’s number and bounced on the balls of my feet waiting for someone to pick up.

It was his voice mail again, “This is Noah. Leave a message, I’ll get back to you.”

“Hi,” I said hesitantly. God, I felt like such a jerk. “It’s me. I’d like to talk. Give me a call if you’d like that too.” Then I hit End before I could say anything that might make me sound even more lame. Although, I’m sure saying I was sorry would have been a good thing.

I set the phone on my desk and sat down to go over the afternoon’s three files. At least I’d have plenty to keep me busy and keep me from fretting.

I checked my phone every fifteen minutes, just in case something was wrong with it. Nothing was. Maybe Noah was just busy, I thought as I left work for the day.

But by the time I went to bed that night, I realized that the man I wanted most in my life had no intention of calling me back.

I dreamed that I was on a beautiful carousel, lazily spinning around and around on an antique lacquered
horse while calliope music played in the background. It was wonderful. I felt alive and free. The only problem was that I could pick one of two places to get off, and I didn’t know which one to pick.

I was just about to make my decision when the music slowed to a droning, creepy melody and finally stopped—as did the carousel.

And then the lights went off on the ride. Without the brightness, I was able to make out surroundings that I hadn’t seen before. Or maybe they just hadn’t been there before. Regardless, I found myself in an amusement park—one that was obviously closed.

I eased off the wooden horse, unease tracing a light finger down my spine. There was something not right about this dream, but I couldn’t quite put my finger on it. Slowly, I stepped down from the turnstile and turned in the direction of the midway, where the lights were brightest.

Discarded gum and tickets littered the pavement, along with pieces of popcorn, straws, and smushed french fries. The smell of cotton candy hung thick and sweet upon the air along with the tinny smell of machinery and the stale odor of cigarette smoke.

Every step I took was cautious. I waited for something to happen, for someone like Freddy Krueger or Leatherface to jump out and disembowel me. I didn’t call out like the stupid girls in horror movies did. I
knew something was out there waiting for me. I just didn’t know how much of a threat it was.

“A woman like you should know better than to be out alone at night.”

I froze, the sole of my shoe landing squarely in a wad of pink bubblegum. I knew that voice, and it wasn’t one I ever hoped to hear again. I didn’t want to turn and face him, but this was just a dream. It wasn’t real. It couldn’t be.

I scraped my shoe against the pavement as I turned. Standing beneath the harsh glow of a lamp was Phil Durdan. He was dressed in jeans, boots, and a sweater. He looked like any old Average Joe with nondescript features. The only thing remotely standoutish about him was the old tarnished medallion hanging around his neck.

My smart-ass reply died on my lips the moment I looked into his eyes. This was no Dreamkin. It really was Phil. But this wasn’t his dream. It was mine.

And when I tried to push him out, he wouldn’t budge. He only smiled. “Not used to people walking into
your
dreams, are you?”

It was a good dig, and were he a normal person I wouldn’t begrudge him for it. But he wasn’t normal, he was a sociopath and he scared the hell out of me. “No, I’m not. I don’t suppose you’d like to tell me how you did it?”

He laughed. “And let you ruin everything? I don’t think so.” His laughter faded. “You put me in jail.”

“The fact you’re a serial rapist put you in jail, Phil.” I kept my tone casual, non-threatening, just like I would with any potentially dangerous client.

“You destroyed my life!”

I didn’t flinch. “You’ve ruined a few yourself.” I thought of Amanda and the bandage on her scalp—and the tingle of fear that had been growing at the base of my spine turned into something angrier. Durdan was a monster, and somehow he had gotten into my dream where I should be all-powerful and wasn’t.

That meant someone had helped him.

Three guesses as to who his mysterious benefactor was. Hmmm. The Warden maybe? My psycho half sister who thought of herself as the defender of all and me as the destroyer of worlds. Again with the paranormal soap opera.

“She must really hate me,” I muttered out loud.

“She does,” Phil agreed, not bothering to pretend that Padera wasn’t the one who made this possible. “She told me to make sure you didn’t survive. And she told me to do whatever I wanted to you.”

There was a hungry, angry gleam in his eye that I didn’t like. I backed up a step. “I can’t die in this world, Phil.”

He shrugged. “But you can suffer.” And then he
smiled. “And I’m pretty confident that by the time I’m done, you’ll wish you were dead.”

What a charmer. “You can suffer too.” As soon as I said the words I had a flood of confidence wash over me. I had the power here. Not him. This was my world.

Huh.
My
world.

Phil smiled. “I’m not afraid.”

He should be. Shouldn’t he? If I defended myself against him, would it fall under the category of me harming a dreamer, or would it be self-defense? And would anyone believe the Warden—my half-fucking-sister—put him up to it?

Given my luck, probably not. Right now that was the least of my concern. Keeping Phil from doing all the damage he could was top priority.

I began backing away. Then, I turned and ran. As my legs ate up the ground beneath me I focused on pushing myself out of the dream. I tried to wake up and that didn’t work. I tried to teleport somewhere else. That didn’t work either.

And then I hit the fence—literally. Easily twenty feet high, it was steel mesh topped with barbed wire. There was no way I was going over it. And a padlock the size of my head ensured that I couldn’t go through the gate.

The Warden had really thought this through. I couldn’t get out in the usual ways. But could I bend the dream to my will?

I heard Phil come up behind me. “This would go a lot easier if you don’t fight.”

I turned as my heart slammed against my ribs. “That’s not going to happen, Phil.”

He looked resigned. “I didn’t think so.”

When he came at me I was ready. This time I sidestepped out of his path, and deflected his oncoming blow with one of the aikido moves Noah had taught me. Phil stumbled, but didn’t fall. And he managed to avoid my foot as I tried to kick him.

“I know I said it would be easier,” he said as he straightened, his face flushed. “But I actually like it better when they fight.”

“I bet you do,” I replied. My adrenaline was pumping now, along with anger, which had thankfully replaced fear as my dominant emotion. I was no good when I was scared, but anger worked for me. It would keep me fighting until I gained control.

He came at me again. This time he managed to land a blow to my stomach, but got my elbow to his jaw, so we were pretty even. But then he grabbed the waist of my jeans and hauled me close. He kicked my feet out from under me as I struggled and I fell. My head hit something solid—not hard enough to make me bleed, but hard enough that I saw stars. It was an old coffee table.

I looked around, half dazed and trying to shake it off
as I attempted to roll to my feet. We were in the doll shop I’d seen in Phil’s dreams. He was the one in control.

He jumped on top of me and slammed me back to the floor. At least he hadn’t thought to change my clothes, and I was thankful for that as I blocked another punch. In jeans and a T-shirt, I wouldn’t be easy to rape. I was pretty certain that a very brutal assault was part of the “whatever” promised to him by the Warden.

I wasn’t going to make that easy for him. I was going to punch and kick him with all I had. In fact, I rather liked the idea of possibly stuffing my heel in his mouth.

He punched me again in the face—the same place as before. Pain raced up the side of my head, making the edges of my vision darken. And then he punched me in the eye. If he kept pounding on me like this, I was going to pass out, and then he could do whatever he wanted.

I couldn’t let that happen.

As soon as that realization hit me, something else did too—and it wasn’t Phil. It was the telltale burning in my eyes. The Nightmare part of me was coming to life, and she was so pissed it wasn’t funny.

It was about damn time.

I smashed my head into his face, knocking him sideways. As he fell to the floor, my gaze landed on the medallion around his neck. Up close it looked familiar—eerily so. It was an object of the Dreaming, marked with two crescent moons back to back. I didn’t know
what it meant, but it wasn’t much of a leap to assume that was what gave Phil power in this realm.

Power coursed through my veins and lit my soul with a terrible glee. Now it was me on top. Me pummeling my victim with brutal jabs. Phil landed a few good ones of his own, but when it seemed that he might recover some of his strength, I wrapped my hand around the medallion and squeezed.

It shattered beneath my fingers. I probably could have crushed diamonds at that moment. Reaching down, I grabbed his chin with one stiff and bloody hand, forcing him to look at me with his swollen eyes.

“Hey, Phil.” My voice was thick because of my battered jaw. It didn’t want to work quite right. Maybe he had broken it. I could fix it later.

He looked at me, and frowned when he saw the color of my eyes—pale aqua with thick, black spidery rims. “What the fuck?”

Only one side of my mouth smiled. “What’s your worst nightmare?”

I saw it like a picture in my mind, as though he’d flipped open his wallet and shown me a snapshot. It was going to be gruesome, but I didn’t care. I concentrated on the image—and his fear of it. I don’t remember ever hearing that Nightmares got off on fear, but part of me kinda did. At least, Phil’s did it for me.

Mother.

It washed over me. My skin tingled like my entire body had been asleep and now all the blood was rushing back to my extremities. I was changing, morphing into what Phil feared most.

And what Phil feared most was his mother being able to control him from beyond the grave—getting her revenge for him killing her many years earlier.

My skin felt stretched, and somehow shrunken. I was dry and brittle, light and almost skeletal, but the pain in my jaw and eye were gone. In fact, my eyeballs felt like raisins, rolling in sockets that were too big for them.

Phil squirmed beneath me, white as a ghost, his eyes huge and round. I think he might have pissed himself too—it smelled like it. Thankfully, in this state I couldn’t feel it against my flesh. I didn’t have much flesh left, and nerve endings were a thing of the past in this form.

“You good for nothing little bastard,” I said. I didn’t have much left for lips, so it came out stiff, with a lisp that sounded like sheets flapping on a clothes line.

Phil pushed at me, as ineffectually as a moth beating its wings against a boulder. I felt only the slightest tug against my flesh. I think something gave way in the vicinity. I tried not to think about it. I wasn’t going to be very effective if I let it get to me.

“Mama?” he squeaked.

I leaned down, joints popping, knees scraping the
rug through muslin-thin flesh. “Come on,” I taunted. “Don’t you have a kiss for your mother?”

Phil shrank away and I continued. “You used to like it when I kissed you.”

“No,” he whispered. “I never did. I never did.”

“Liar! The first doll you made had my hair, from my head as well as my pussy.” This was too twisted, but I kept it going. “You’d be nothing right now without me. You are nothing without me.”

He shook his head. There were tears in his eyes. He was truly terrified. I almost felt guilty. Almost.

“Such a disappointment,” I said sadly, teeth clacking.

Phil went berserk then and lurched at me with a howl of rage. I screamed back, laughing manically as I did so. Little fucker thought he could turn on
me
like that?

I undulated against him, making all kinds of rude gestures and remarks as I simulated riding him. He began to sob sometime during all of this. Then the sobs turned to a kind of wet babbling. That was when I realized his mind had snapped. When I realized what I had done. He was gone, even though his body kept fighting. Darkness swarmed the edges of my brain—I literally felt unconsciousness coming for me. I didn’t want to pass out and be left alone with this…mess.

Dear God. Someone help me.

And then, as though in answer to my silent prayer, I heard a familiar voice above me. “What the hell?”

Noah. It was Noah. I must have called out to him, and beautiful creature that he was he answered, allowing me to draw him into my dream. It was knowing that he was there that enabled me to regain control.

I changed back—just thought about it and let it happen. It hurt a little, but not much. I looked up, slid onto the floor, and met the unreadable gaze of the man I adored. “Noah, meet Phil. The Warden let him into my dream so he could rape me.”

To say that Noah’s expression was murderous would have been an understatement. It went beyond murderous. Before Phil could move, Noah kicked him in the ribs.

“Fucking son of a bitch!” Noah yelled. Several more kicks made sure the rapist couldn’t get up—not that he
was capable of it before this. I think I fried his brain pretty good, judging from the glazed look in his eyes. Noah must have noticed too—or maybe it was the drool—but he stopped his kicking and turned back to me.

“What the hell was that?” Noah asked as he helped me to my feet. “You looked like a goddamn zombie.”

“I kinda was.” My jaw throbbed so I had to speak slowly and carefully. “I was his mother. He’s terrified of her, even though he murdered her.”

I felt him go still, but only for a second. “Jesus, Doc. Sometimes you scare me.”

My heart pinched a little. “Sometimes I scare myself.”

He hugged me then, taking away the sting of his words. “I don’t care what kind of freaky things you can do, I’m just glad you can do them.” He kissed me firmly on the forehead, carefully avoiding my eye and jaw.

“Thanks for coming,” I said, my jaw damn near immobile now. I had to heal myself—if only I could concentrate enough to do it. It wouldn’t take much, but I was so drained it felt like trying to lift a house. “How did you know?”

He smoothed hair back from my forehead. “I don’t know. I just knew you were in trouble and that I had to get to you.” Proof positive that he was indeed more than just a lucid dreamer. He was one of the anomalies. No wonder I had been drawn to him.

And he’d come running to my rescue. The thought
made me chuckle—which hurt, but not like it had, so obviously my body was beginning to heal.

“What’s so funny?” he demanded, but there wasn’t any harshness to it.

I looked up into his beautiful black eyes. “I tried to break up with you because I thought you were the one who was more vulnerable in this world, and I’m the one who needed saving.”

He grinned and I knew it meant something to him to hear me say it. “You held your own.”

My laughter faded as I thought of what I had done. “I was scared.” Scared of Phil. Scared of the Warden. Scared of myself.

Noah hugged me again. “You’re safe now.”

For a moment I believed him, but I knew it wouldn’t last. Breathing slowly, I willed my jaw to mend and my body to heal faster so I’d be in better shape to face what happened next. Both happened with surprising ease—the after effects of the surge of power I’d felt earlier.

Reaching up, I placed a palm on either side of Noah’s face, loving the feel of his stubble against my skin. I pulled his head down to mine and kissed him. His lips were firm and smooth, parting easily for my tongue. I tasted him and sighed. It was like coming home again. That was when he took control, wrapping me tight in the warm, hard circle of his arms, claiming my mouth
with hot, wet determination. I moaned—from pleasure not from pain—and let him have his way.

When we broke apart, both of us were breathing a little harder. Noah rested his forehead against mine. “Come back to me,” he whispered.

Tears burned the backs of my eyes at the catch in his voice. How had we become this entwined in the brief time we’d been together? I cupped my hand around the back of his neck, kneading the tense muscles there. “I didn’t really leave,” I whispered back.

Behind me someone cleared their throat. I sighed and gave Noah another squeeze before turning in his arms. His hands fell to my hips as he stood behind me, facing this new arrival with me.

It was Verek, of course.

I forced a tight smile. “What took you so long?”

“He can’t come with us.” Verek’s jaw was tight as he glanced at Noah. At this point, I really didn’t care if he was jealous or found Noah a threat. I was just glad to have my guy beside me.

“He’s coming,” I insisted, taking Noah by the hand. “If you’re dragging me to face the firing squad, I want him with me.”

The Nightmare rolled his eyes. “The Council is assembled, they’re waiting for you in the great hall.”

“The Council?” I stared at him. “You really are tak
ing me before a firing squad, aren’t you?”

He gave me a sympathetic look. “It’s been reported that you used your powers to harm a dreamer.” He glanced at Phil, still lying upon the floor. “The Council wishes to uncover why.”

“I don’t have a choice, do I?”

He shook his head. “I’m afraid not.” He offered me his hand. “I’m to escort you.”

Of course he was. I took his hand, still holding Noah’s in the other. “Hold on,” I said, closing my eyes. Noah’s fingers tightened on mine.

When I opened my eyes we were in the same temple-like building as before. This had to be the Council’s chambers. We entered the main room through the open doors, and as we walked, heads turned. The looks I got weren’t all that friendly.

“The people in this world really seem to have it in for me,” I remarked tightly as we walked up the aisle toward the front of the room.

“You scare them,” Verek murmured, his head high. Beside me, Noah kept his gaze lifted as well. Was he scared? Or was he full of defiance? I figured it was probably the latter.

I glanced at Verek out of the corner of my eye. “Do I scare you?”

He looked away. “A little.”

Great. Not only did I scare Noah, but Verek as well.
My father was probably scared as well. This was just freaking dandy. The whole damn Council was probably terrified that I was going to rain ruination down upon them all. I directed my attention to the front of the great hall, where the Council sat like a sour-faced jury. My father sat to the left of them, flanked by Hadria and the Warden—my sister, who looked all too pleased to see me. She looked pleased to see Noah as well. No doubt she saw his presence as just one more nail in my coffin.

Morpheus looked pained, and I think maybe there were tears in his eyes as his gaze fell on my battered face. Even Hadria, who rarely looked anything but serene, seemed disconcerted by my appearance. At least they were on my side. So I had them along with Verek and Noah to support me. Against the entire Council and an audience of at least two hundred Dreamkin. Fabulous.

Why the hell couldn’t I have been born human?

“What’s this all about?” I asked, refusing to take one step closer to Padera and her nest of vipers.

My father’s shoulders sagged. “A few minutes ago the Warden called the Council together, claiming you used your powers against a dreamer. She’s renewed her petition for the Council to order you unmade.”

Of course she did. The bitch planned this whole thing. And I’d played right into her hands, probably
even better than she expected.

“And that’s it? I’m not given any warning, just brought here and put on trial?”

Were those tears in his eyes? Christ, this was as much to hurt him as it was to get to me. “Yes.”

“That really sucks.” And it really pissed me off, but there didn’t seem to be anything I could do about it other than allow Verek to escort me to the front of the cavernous room where my father and the others waited.

“And she has brought a dreamer with her!” Padera shrilled triumphantly. She turned to the Council. “See! She willfully brings a human into our realm.”

“Actually,” Noah said before I could. “I came here on my own.”

The Warden stiffened, slowly turning her head to fix Noah with a cold stare. “I beg your pardon?”

My hold on Noah’s fingers tightened as he stepped forward. He squeezed back. “I was in my own dream when I sensed that Dawn was in trouble. I don’t know if she pulled me into her dream or if I walked into hers, but I found her fighting with a convicted rapist.” He gestured to my face. “You can plainly see what he did to her.”

Red-faced, Padera pointed behind us. “And we all can plainly see what she did to him.”

I don’t know why I bothered to look when I already had a good idea of what was going on. Two large
Nightmares practically carried Phil into the chambers between them. The rapist was pale and vacant and there was a dark, wet stain on the front of his pants. If you have a dream that you piss yourself, do you wake up wet?

It was a testament to how surreal this all was that I even asked such a question—even if it was only to myself.

Of course murmurs rose up from the crowd as Phil was brought through. I could feel the daggerlike gazes whipped in my direction. At this rate, they weren’t going to bother hearing my side of it, they were just going to lynch me.

“It was self-defense,” I blurted. It was very difficult to look at my father, but I did. He looked so sorry, so ashamed and pained. “My life was in danger.”

“You expect the Council to believe that?” the Warden asked snidely. “You cannot die in this realm.”

I turned to her, trying to keep my anger at bay. “But I can be raped, can’t I?” I held her gaze, letting her know that I knew she had been behind the attack. She shifted a little, but did not look away.

“It’s impossible,” she insisted. “No human could come into
your
dream and harm you. Humans can’t dreamwalk.”

More murmurs. A few council members nodded in agreement. I wanted to smash their stupid Q-Tip heads
together.

“Therefore,” my sister continued smugly, “you must have walked into his dream and attacked him.”

I ground my teeth. “He came to me.”

She just kept smiling.

“Dawn”—it was my father who spoke—“do you have any proof to support your theory?”

My
theory
? Even my own father didn’t believe me? Fuck around.

Reaching into the pocket of my jeans I pulled out the broken medallion I had taken from Phil. I offered it to Morpheus. “He was wearing this.”

The heavy wooden splinters fell into his open palm. I watched as his expression went from bewilderment to recognition to flushed anger. “Truly?” He raised his head to stare at me with eyes that were more pale and spidery than they had been a moment before. “You took this from him?”

I nodded, resisting the urge to back away from him. Hadria set her hand upon his arm, offering what I hoped was some kind of calm. “I thought you would know what it is.”

“I do.” His nostrils quivered as he took a deep breath. “I give these amulets to the people I care about. They’re imbued with a part of my essence, a talisman against harm.”

“This is ridiculous!” Padera broke in. She turned to
the Council. “The amulet is probably her own.”

“It’s not,” I replied. “But since you brought it up, where’s yours, sis? You do have one, don’t you?”

She flushed, but her fingers went to the neckline of her sleeveless blouse and pulled a thin chain free. Dangling from it was a wooden circle exactly like the one I’d destroyed.

Damn. I was really hoping she wouldn’t have hers. I was sure she had been the one to supply Phil. She probably was, but she’d obviously gotten the amulet elsewhere.

I turned to Morpheus when I couldn’t stand looking at Padera’s arrogant face any longer. “How many are there?”

My father shrugged. “A dozen maybe.”

“Have you ever given one to a human?”

He frowned, distracted. “Your mother has one. As do you.”

“That’s probably hers in your hand,” Padera drawled.

I glared at her. Our father barely glanced at her, but his tone left no doubt as to how he felt. “Padera, if you cannot control yourself, you will leave these proceedings.”

The Warden flushed bright crimson, but she didn’t cower. “You cannot brush me aside as you could when I was a child, my lord. As a Nightmare, your precious
daughter is under my jurisdiction.”

Morpheus stiffened. Long fingers closed around the broken medallion, going white at the knuckles as he squeezed. “And as my child and subject, you are under my jurisdiction. I may not be able to force you to leave, but I can fix it so you no longer have a mouth to speak with.”

It was all I could do not to grin at Padera. Hell, it was all I could do not to scream “Neener-neener-neener” and point my finger at her. And oddly enough, I felt a little sorry for her. Her words had given away a huge glimpse into her emotional state, and now I saw her not only as someone who hated me, but someone who hated me because I’d had the love of a father whom she believed didn’t love her.

Padera paled but she wisely held her tongue. I had no doubt that Morpheus would make good on his threat.

My father rose to his feet and turned to the Council. “We will take a break,” he told them. “I need to find out how the human came to be in possession of my mark.”

I glanced at Phil who was still out of it. “Can you fix him?” I asked. Much as I thought he deserved to rot, I felt a little bad about making him as fully functional as broccoli.

Morpheus shrugged. “It depends on the damage done.”

Well, there you go.

The Warden wasn’t happy about the recess, obviously, but she didn’t say anything except, “What about the Princess?” And even those few words dripped with disdain.

My eyes narrowed. “Technically, aren’t you a princess too?”

Bright red lips parted, no doubt to tear me a new one, but Morpheus spoke first: “Dawn will remain at the palace until we reconvene.”

I will?

“What is to stop her from leaving?” A council member asked. “She is very powerful in this world, and no one can follow her into the human realm.”

My father’s expression set into harsh lines. I’d never seen him look like this. “If she leaves, she will be unmade as soon as she sets foot in this realm again.”

My mouth fell open. Had he just said that he would willingly unmake me? Son of a bitch! I could go home, but the next time I fell asleep that was it. Fabulous.

“With an invitation like that, how can I refuse?” Snide? You bet I was snide. I was also freaked out. It had to be bad for Morpheus to put my life on the line like that.