Dead Push (Kiera Hudson Series Two#7) (7 page)

“But what about us, Lilly?” I said, rubbing at my narrow temples with my fingers. “They afflicted us with the Lycanthrope curse because we murdered women and children. Isn’t that exactly what the Elders would’ve wanted?”

“And has our race stopped killing now that we’re wolves?” Lilly asked, staring straight back at me.

“No, we kill more,” I said thoughtfully.

“Exactly,” Lilly sighed deeply. “Not only do the Elders feed off the pain and suffering of our victims, but now they also suck on the pain and torment we feel as we struggle with the curse. They sold us a false promise that if we stopped killing then the curse would be lifted, but they knew we would never beat it. Look at the pain and suffering the curse has caused us. As wolves, we’ve
struggled our whole lives to kick the habit of killing. The Elders are now getting twice as much pain and suffering than before they cursed us – when we were just killers. We were enjoying murdering – but not any longer. Our pain has become as great as our victims’. The fun has been taken out of it. The Elders can’t afford for anyone or anything to have too much fun for too long.”

“And I thought you two were a couple of evil motherfuckers,” Potter said, looking at us. “You look like a couple of freaking saints compared to the Elders.”

“I’ll take that as a backhanded compliment,” I barked at him.

“Take it anyhow you like,” Potter said, lighting another cigarette.

“But what I want to know is where Kiera fits into all of this? Why does she have to choose between the humans and the Vampyrus?”

Lilly looked at Potter and said, “Where there is darkness, there must also be light,” she said. “You can’t have one without the other. Noah knew that and that’s why he was banished. He was the light shining brightly on the Elders’ dark plans. Noah knew that it was inevitable that at some point in time, someone would come who wouldn’t give in to the Elders’ hate and pain. This person would be strong, show courage, and always look to the light when thrown into darkness. The Elders knew that such a person would be dangerous if he or she managed to set a shining example and get others to follow. They suspected that if ever such a person should come, then they would have to have more strength than just a mere human or Vampyrus, and would therefore be the best of both species – a half breed or half and half. This only made the Elders more intent on forbidding mixing between the humans, Vampyrus, and Lycanthrope,” Lilly explained.

“But despite their manipulations and cunning, Kiera came,” Potter said thoughtfully, cigarette smoke lingering around his fingers.

“When they discovered how resilient Kiera was when they saw how she would never hate and could overcome any obstacle
, then they knew she was the one they feared,” Lilly said. “But in their twisted hearts, they realised that perhaps her kindness and love could be their strength.”

“How?”
I asked her.

“At first they were happy to linger in the shadows and watch Luke Bishop – Elias Munn – try and break her, but his plans were thwarted because she fell in love with you, Potter, and not him.”

“You can’t blame her, I guess,” Potter said with that cocky smirk of his.

Like me, Lilly ignored his comment and continued. “The Elders knew they had to get Kiera to choose between the two races – the humans and the Vampyrus,” she said.

“But why?” I asked.

“Because she’s a half breed,” Lilly said, and both
me and Potter shared a brief knowing glance. “For Kiera to make a choice between the two different sides would be like a mother choosing between her two children. Now if Kiera had made that choice, can you even begin to imagine the pain, the guilt, the torment she would have felt forever more knowing that she had destroyed an entire race of people – her people – whichever way she made her choice? The Elders would’ve fed off her pain for an eternity.”

“But I thought it was Luke who was making her choose,” Potter said.

“The Elders wanted him and you to believe that,” Lilly explained. “They were manipulating Luke because they knew he was evil, greedy, and weak. They could never let anyone know it was their wish and plan alone for Kiera to choose. Why do you think Kiera had to make her choice in the Dust Palace? The Elders wanted to be there when she did so. They wanted to see the pain in her eyes – get a whiff of her anguish and trap those feelings of despair in their lair.”  

“But Kiera wouldn’t be manipulated by Luke, and she didn’t choose. She sacrificed herself by throwing herself at me,” I said, remembering how she had run towards me in the Dust Palace. “She would’ve rather have died than cause anyone else pain.”

“And the Elders were furious,” Lilly whispered. “They wanted to punish her for what they saw as her trickery. But they also needed her.”

“Why?” Potter asked before I’d the chance to ask the very same question, which was on my lips.

“From what I’ve heard, this Kiera Hudson is like no other – she is unique,” Lilly said.

“She is,” Potter cut in again, his jet-black eyes clouding over as if picturing her in his mind. 

I thought of her, too, and how she had had such an effect on me in the little time I had spent with her in that room. Even though I had tortured and killed her father in front of her, even though I was threatening to kill the man she loved and her friends, she still wouldn’t give up on me. It was like she saw something in me that I couldn’t
see
. Anyone else in that very same position would’ve killed me – had their revenge for everything I had done to them – but not Kiera. Even though I could see she was in pain at the sight of her father dying before her, she hadn’t given in to that pain and killed me, handed me over to Potter and Murphy who were coming for me. It was like even in the darkest hour of her life, she had seen some flicker of light. Had she seen that flicker of light in me? I wondered.

“The Elders realised that those that love the most hurt the most,” Lilly continued. “So they weren’t quite finished with your friend Kiera Hudson yet. The Elders bought her back…”

“So they could fuck with her head,” Potter said, sounding angry.

“Not my choice of words, Potter, but yes, you’re right,” Lilly said. “As Jack tore Kiera to pieces in the Dust Place before the Elders, it was like her life – her very soul was unravelled for them to see. It was then they saw everything – what Kiera truly was and how they had been deceived. And for the first time it was they, the Elders, who felt pain and misery as they learnt how they had been deceived by Murphy.”

“So the Elders know that Kiera is like us?” I asked Lilly.

“She’s nothing like you two,” Potter snapped.

Ignoring him, Lilly said, “Yes, they know where Kiera came from and who and what she really is. The Elders didn’t like the fact they had been tricked – conned, they felt despair and they started to fall apart beneath their robes – it was like they were being unravelled. So they decided to punish Kiera. They wanted to cause her so much pain they hoped it would help to heal them. So they
pushed
her into this world where she would learn about her father, her mother, her brother, and what she really was. They would make sure she discovered what a liar and a cheat the man she loved was,” Lilly said, casting an eye at Potter sitting next to her on the bench.

Potter looked down at the ground and Lilly continued.

“They wanted Kiera to learn that Murphy had kept secrets from her, they wanted her to see her father die all over again.” And this time Lilly looked at me. “They sent Kayla and Isidor back because the Elders knew how much they were like a brother and a sister and they wanted Kiera to see them die all over again. They wanted to
push
Kiera into a world of pain so they could feed off her, like rats gnawing at a corpse.”

“So that was just a bunch of bullshit about us being angels sent back to help Kiera?” Potter asked, crushing out another cigarette and lighting another almost at once.

“Yes,” Lilly said with a nod of her head. “They needed you all to believe in this new world. They wanted you to think you had a purpose other than to cause Kiera pain – because it wasn’t just about Kiera’s anguish – it was about all of your pain, too.”

“So my name isn’t really Gabriel?” Potter
asked, his eyes wide and hopeful. “Because I can tell you, being called that has been pretty fucking painful. Murphy hasn’t stopped taking the piss.”

“Being sent back has been more than just about a name,” Lilly said, sounding exasperated with Potter. I knew how she felt. “They wanted you to not only feel pain yourself – but also cause pain for Kiera.”

“I’d never hurt Kiera,” Potter growled as if he were being accused.

“How’s Sophie Harrison?” Lilly shot back.

“I didn’t go looking for her to hurt Kiera…” Potter spluttered, coughing up a lungful of smoke.

“Going in search of your past lover hurt Kiera though, didn’t it?” Lilly said. “Not only did it hurt Kiera, it caused you and Sophie pain. How much hurt was Sophie caused by remembering you and then knowing that she couldn’t have you?”

“That’s pretty goddamn spiteful,” I said, enjoying seeing Potter squirm.

“You hurt her, too,” Lilly said, snapping her head around to look at me. “You went to her house in your search for Kiera. You murdered Marty, her boyfriend in this world.”

Now it was my turn to drop my head.

“You twisted sonofabitch…” Potter started.

“That’s before any of this,” I howled, raising my head to look at the both of them. “I did that when I hated Kiera – when I wanted her dead for deceiving me in The Hollows. That’s before I spent time with Kiera at her father’s house…”

“Where you made her watch you kill him…” Potter cut in.

“Enough already!” Lilly barked, raising her hands like a referee separating two caged fighters. “You’ve both screwed up –we all have. But sitting here and pointing the finger of blame isn’t going to stop the Elders. And it certainly isn’t going to help Kiera. Now grow up – the pair of you.”

We sat in silence. I breathed deeply as I tried to control my rage. I was pretty much angry the whole time, but Potter really knew how to push my buttons. I sat and watched the dead rush for their trains or join
the line for the ticket booth. Just as I felt the seething rage ease within me, Potter opened his mouth again.

“So if you’re right and the Elders are feeding off all of our pain, especially Kiera’s, don’t you think someone should go and tell her I’m not really dead? I mean, I’m not bigging myself up, but she looked pretty fucking distraught when she thought she saw me die back in Wasp Water.”

“No,” Lilly said. “For now Kiera has to believe you’re dead, as do your friends. You’re right, the Elders will be enjoying this – they will be almost high on her despair – so high that they will take their eye off us and what we’re really planning.”

“And what is that?” I asked her.

“To unmask the photographer,” Lilly said right back with a knowing smile.

Potter

I had seen the photographer once before. Whoev
er was hiding beneath that hoodie had snapped a picture of me holding the dead body of that wolf boy – Dorsey, I think his name was. Whatever, I’d been set up by the dickhead sitting on the bench next to me and Lilly. That photograph had been used to convict me and send me to the guillotine.

“Ask your friend who the photographer is,” I said to Lilly, pointing at Jack. I really didn’t know if I could trust either of these wolves. I’d put my trust in
the Lycanthrope before and got myself in the shit. Why should it be any different now?

“What’s that s’posed to mean?” Jack snarled back at me.

“Oh come on, Jack,” I glared back. “You set me up with that wolf teacher and her sidekick pupil. You got the photographer to share a Kodak moment with me and the dead boy.”

“I set you up because I wanted Kiera to see what a lying-cheating little turd you really are,” Jack said. “I didn’t ask the photographer to photograph you with the dead boy. I was kinda hoping that those two wolves were going to tear your freaking heart out.”

“I got a good fucking kick-in, thanks to your mate,” I said to Lilly, remembering how those Skin-walker cops had turned up and beaten the shit out of me in the snow.

“Look, we can sit here forever more blaming each other for events that have happened in the past,” Lilly said, looking frustrated with the both of us. “But it’s not going to solve anything. If we are going to
push
back, you two have got to learn to accept that for now, you’re on the same side – on the same team.”

Jack looked at me and I looked away. I didn’t know if being on the same team was possible for me and Jack. But I bit my tongue and said nothing more. I would suffer his company for now, only because it would help Kiera. There was no other reason, and deep in my heart I was never gonna trust him and I was gonna keep my wits about me around Lilly Blu. After all, both of them were wolves. Then, trying to ease my aching conscience a little, I looked at Lilly and said, “You know it wasn’t just me going in search of Sophie that made her remember the world before it got pushed. Somebody had been sending her those letters I had once written to her. Was that the photographer, too?”