Death by Engagement (15 page)

“That
doesn’t speak well of Doug, though, does it?” asked Cindy.

“Maybe
not,” said Kate, “but he’s not that much different from a thousand other guys.
Maybe Cayenne was too much of a woman for him. Guys don’t like that, really, do
they?”

“Some
do,” said Cindy, thinking of Mattheus, who had helped her grow strong.

“Oh
yeah, tell me who?” asked Kate.

“Haven’t
you had boyfriends like that yourself?” Cindy turned it back to her. “Guys who
appreciate the strong, honest, gutsy young woman you are?”

Kate
looked away. “I haven’t found someone like that yet,” she replied.

“He’s
there waiting, Kate,” Cindy encouraged her. “Don’t give up expecting him to
come.”

*

After
lunch was over, Kate wanted to go back home. She’d said all she had to at that
point and seemed suddenly washed out.

“I
hope I’ve helped the investigation,” Kate murmured about halfway back.

“You’ve
helped a lot,” said Cindy. “I have a much better picture of Shari’s life.”

“So,
where does this all lead then?” asked Kate, looking confused herself for a
moment.

“I’m
not sure yet,” said Cindy, hesitantly.

“You
said before that you weren’t sure that it was a suicide,” Kate remarked.
“You’re the only one who’s said that.”

“Except
for Shari’s father, Edward,” Cindy mentioned.

“Yes,
but nobody takes him seriously,” Kate remarked.

“Who
else should I talk to?” Cindy turned to Kate wholeheartedly then. “You know
more about the people involved.”

“I
would definitely talk to Cayenne,” Kate said slowly, “and also Tad.”

Cindy
was surprised that Kate knew about Shari’s former boyfriend. “You know about
Tad?”

“Of
course, everyone does. He and Shari dated the last time she and Doug broke up.
I heard he’s devastated and coming down to the island now as we speak.”

“Yes,
that’s right,” said Cindy. “Seems he had strong feeling for Shari.”

“That’s
what I always thought,” said Kate. “Tad seemed right for her, too, more
emotional. And she seemed happy with him when I once saw them together.”

“So,
why did she get back with Doug then?” asked Cindy intently.

“That’s
the question, isn’t it?” Kate echoed her thoughts. “But whatever the answer is,
one thing is sure. It was a stupid decision for both of them.”

After
she dropped Kate off a few blocks from the hotel, Cindy felt ill at ease. The
time with Kate brought up more questions than it answered. Kate seemed driven
to speak the truth as she knew it, wasn’t backing off from anything. Cindy
respected her a great deal, and yet also wondered if Kate’s feeling so
disempowered in her family was not causing her to make waves that would
ultimately lead to nothing.

Cindy
got off at the hotel, paid the driver and slowly went back up to the room. As
she walked down the hallway, she wondered if Mattheus would be there waiting
for her, and what he had been doing.

“I’m
back,” Cindy called the moment she walked in.

“Out
on the balcony,” Mattheus’s voice echoed back.

Cindy
was relieved that he was still there. She hadn’t realized how nervous she’d
felt about it. The case was taking longer than planned and now there was
definitely more to look into. Cindy wondered how Mattheus would take that.

Cindy
walked out onto the balcony, under the sky which had had grown darker. Heavy
clouds had drifted in and cool breezes were blowing unrestrainedly. Cindy saw
Mattheus lying stretched out on a chair with an empty lunch tray beside him.
He’d obviously called up for food and eaten alone.

“So
good to see you.” Cindy went over to him, leaned down and gave him a warm hug.

“A
ticking time bomb,” Mattheus commented, not responding to the hug at all.

Cindy
came around the chair and sat down beside him. “What do you mean?” she asked,
slightly upset at not getting a hug in return.

“I
mean Kate’s a ticking time bomb,” he repeated. “She’s the kind who thrives on
trouble, enjoys dissension.”

Cindy
was surprised at the vehemence in his tone. He and Kate truly disliked one
another.

“I
actually learned a lot from her,” Cindy said slowly. “Got a lot of good
information.”

Mattheus
reached out his hand for Cindy’s then. It relieved her greatly.

“Kate
told me that both Shari and Doug dated other people regularly when they broke
up,” Cindy went on.

“On
again, off again,” Mattheus mused slowly. “When have I heard that refrain
before?”

His
voice sounded half bored, half cynical.

Cindy
wanted to get to the heart of it, though. “The question is why they got back
together this time. It sounded like Shari was a lot happier with other guys.”

“Cindy”—Mattheus
turned to her swiftly—“I’m not really that interested in the ins and outs of
Shari and Doug’s love life. It’s our love life that concerns me right now.”

Cindy
flushed from head to toe. “I’m so sorry, Mattheus,” Cindy started.

 “Sorry
doesn’t do it,” he cut her off short. “I miss you, Cindy. I’m not happy like
this.”

“I
miss you, too,” Cindy breathed, feeling suddenly dizzy.

“And
to top off our glorious vacation, I got another call from your mom and Frank,”
Mattheus went on.

Cindy
felt herself get pale. “What now?” she asked.

“They’re
taking an early evening plane out of Aruba tonight,” Mattheus said, “and asked
for one more chance to meet with us.”

“Oh
my,” said Cindy, “I didn’t know they were still here. When did they call?”

“Right
after you left with Kate,” said Mattheus. “Frank was the one who called, he
sounded uptight. I’m sure your mother’s making it awful for him.”

“When
do they want to see us? There’s not much time left,” Cindy breathed, feeling
suddenly forlorn.

“No,
you don’t get it, Cindy,” Mattheus interrupted. “I told them it was out of the
question.”

Cindy’s
mind began whirling. “What?” she replied. “You said that without asking me?”

“I
said I had no desire to meet with them again right now,” Mattheus repeated.

“What
did Frank say?” Cindy was aghast.

“He
said then they’d like to meet with you alone,” Mattheus answered crisply.

“Fair
enough,” said Cindy, breathless.

“No,
you’re not getting the point.” Mattheus’s voice sounded grim. “There’s nothing
fair about it at all. I told Frank we were a couple now and we would meet them
together, or not at all.”

“That’s
harsh, Mattheus.” Cindy couldn’t believe what she was hearing. “This is my
family,” she exclaimed.

Mattheus
stood up swiftly from his chair then. “No, I’m your family now,” he replied.
“You’re engaged to me, remember?”

“Are
you saying I have to choose between you and them?” Cindy stood up swiftly as
well, standing toe to toe with him.

“I’m
saying how could you even want to go to dinner with people who treated me so
badly, who bad-mouth me and want to break up the relationship?” Mattheus was
appalled.

“They’re
not people, they’re my family,” Cindy replied. “I have a right to talk to them
and work the problems out.”

“Are
you going to work out the problems between them and me, too?” Mattheus spoke
heatedly.

“They
invited both of us to dinner,” Cindy retorted.

“But
I don’t want to see them again,” exclaimed Mattheus. “I have no desire to sit
down at a table with them.”

“Not
ever?” asked Cindy.

“Not
now,” Mattheus breathed. “Especially the way things have been between us.”

Tears
stung Cindy’s eyes and her heart began pounding. “Because I’ve been working on
the case?”

“We
came down here to celebrate our engagement,” said Mattheus, “and look how
things have turned out.”

Deeply
shaken, Cindy walked to the edge of the railing. Mattheus had no right to
answer to her family for her. She could still call them, of course, and arrange
the dinner, but what would that do to her relationship with him? Standing
there, looking at the darkening sky, it seemed clear she would have to choose
between them. At least for now.

“I
need to speak to my family,” Cindy said silently.

“I
can’t hear you.” Mattheus walked over to her.

“I
won’t go to dinner with them,” Cindy spoke louder, “but I’m going to call back
and speak to Frank and my mother. It’s not your place to answer for me.”

Mattheus
grew silent and stiff at Cindy’s side.

“It’s
going to have a terrible effect on our relationship if I have to give up my
family for you,” Cindy went on. “How can I live with that over the long haul?”

“How
will I live with them hovering over my life?” Mattheus retorted.

“I
can see them separately.” Cindy’s voice grew dim.

“I
need loyalty,” Mattheus said gruffly. “If someone is against me, I need you on
my side.”

“I
am on your side, Mattheus,” Cindy said, bitterness filling her heart. “I have
always been on your side and I always will. Take a minute and really think
about what you’re asking of me.”

The
wind blew hard at both of them then, tossing Cindy’s hair across her face,
which, to her surprise, was wet with tears falling.

*

Cindy
tried to call her family several times, but they didn’t answer. As she watched
the afternoon drift into evening, she realized that they would soon be boarding
the plane to return home. Would this be the end of their relationship? The idea
was incomprehensible to her, but stranger things had happened. She’d heard of
families who hadn’t spoken for years. Of course, Mattheus’s feelings were also
understandable. He’d felt hurt by them and Cindy realized that. She would have
liked nothing more than to straighten it all out with her family and wondered
if they’d ever pick up the phone again. After their discussion, Mattheus had
gone downstairs alone, and Cindy was glad that he had. She hadn’t asked where
he was going or when he’d be back, either. They both definitely needed time
alone.

Cindy
sat on the balcony and watched night fall, as a sliver of the moon glimmered behind
the thick clouds. Cindy had seen this side of Mattheus before, but it hadn’t
hit her as hard as it did tonight. Was this par for the course for an
engagement? Everyone said it was a time when all issues with families came up
to be handled. Or was this more than that? Was it a red flag, warning her of
upcoming danger in her relationship with him?

It
was quite a bit later when the phone finally rang. Cindy reached for it slowly,
thinking it was either Mattheus or Frank. To her surprise, Edward was on the
other end.

“Sorry
to call you so late,” he said hastily. “Is it too late to talk?”

“No,
go ahead,” said Cindy.

“Mitch
Boden wants to meet with you tomorrow morning,” Edward went on.

“Who?”
Cindy asked, confused for a moment.

“Shari’s
psychiatrist. He’s down here visiting, helping both families. He’s spoken to
Marla and also Doug. I told him you also wanted to talk to him.”

“Oh,
yes, of course,” said Cindy, “that’s a good idea.”

“Great.”
Edward seemed relieved. “Can you meet him in Doug’s room, at about nine
thirty?”

“Sure,”
said Cindy, “I’ll be there.”

Cindy
hung up feeling relieved as well. It was great to have the case to focus on
now. She’d have to go to bed early to be in shape for it. She got up, ran her
hands through her hair and went to the bathroom to wash up.

On
her way to the bathroom, Cindy heard the door to the suite open. It had to be
Mattheus returning. Cindy rushed into the bathroom, closed the door, turned on
the shower, took off her clothes and stepped into the shower, fast. As the warm
water poured over her, Cindy stood there for a long while wondering what would
happen between her and Mattheus next.

*

Cindy
and Mattheus slept on separate sides of the bed, not speaking to one another.
When Cindy awoke early to make her appointment, he was still sleeping. Once
again, she left him a brief note.

I’m
going to speak to Shari’s psychiatrist in Doug’s room. After that, we’ve got to
talk.

Then
she slipped into a new pair of linen slacks, put on a fresh blouse, did her
makeup and walked out of the room ready for work.

Dr.
Mitch Boden was a formidable figure. Tall, with salt and pepper hair and
dressed in a beige linen suit and blue striped shirt, he stood at the sofa in
Doug’s room when Cindy walked in.

“How
do you do, Cindy,” Dr. Boden said in a resonant voice as soon as she entered.

“Pleased
to meet you,” Cindy responded, extending her hand.

As
the room was empty except for Cindy and Dr. Boden, she took a moment to look
around. This was the room Shari had stayed in before her death. Cindy had been
in the room briefly when she’d first met Doug, but hadn’t had the opportunity
to inspect it carefully. She wanted to do so now. Cindy wondered, in passing,
if any unseen evidence could possibly be lying around.

Open,
airy and well appointed, there was nothing particularly noticeable about the
surroundings, though.

“Won’t
you sit down on the sofa, so we can talk.” Dr. Boden took charge immediately.

“Thanks,”
said Cindy, walking over and scanning everything with care. As she approached
the sofa, suddenly an odd-shaped peach-colored clay mark caught Cindy’s eye. It
was ground into the light gray carpet, hardly noticeable at all. Cindy sat
down, leaned over and rubbed her hands over it.

“Something
wrong?” Dr. Boden asked, watching Cindy intently.

“No,
not at all, I’m sorry,” said Cindy. “Just looking around at the room Shari and
Doug shared before she died.”

“It’s
interesting to talk to a detective,” Dr. Boden commented. “Quite a daring job
for a young woman, isn’t it?”

“I
love my work,” Cindy replied, immediately engaged.

“That’s
wonderful,” he said.

“I
understand that you knew Shari quite well.” Cindy changed the topic abruptly.

“Yes,
very well,” Dr. Boden said quietly, reflecting on it all for a moment.

“This
must be quite a shock for you,” Cindy went on.

“Absolutely,
it is a shock,” Dr. Boden replied evenly. “Even though it’s not unusual for
depressed patients to take their lives, it’s always a shock when it happens.”

Cindy
valued and respected his honesty.

“I
liked Shari very much,” Dr. Boden continued. “She was a lovely young woman in
so many ways.”

“There
was no sign that anything like this was coming?” Cindy was curious.

“If
you are asking whether or not Shari reported suicidal ideation, the answer is
no,” he went on. “However, over time, suicidal wishes can develop
unconsciously. Patients who experience depression on a long-standing basis go
through peaks and valleys.”

“Naturally,
“said Cindy. “Shari was fortunate to have you caring for her all these years.”

“I
was also fortunate to help her and the family,” he responded somberly.

“Was
Shari happy about her upcoming marriage?” Cindy realized how strongly she felt
something more was amiss, something she hadn’t yet discovered. “Did Shari have
apprehensions she discussed with you?”

“Naturally,
she had apprehensions, like any woman would. We worked on those over time,” Dr.
Boden replied.

“Shari
came to know definitely that Doug was the right one for her?” Cindy wanted
assurances.

“Yes,
it was a process that took time,” Dr. Boden agreed. “Over times couples get to
see all sides of one another and gradually become at home with it all. Doug is
a fine young man. He was a healthy choice for a mate for Shari.”

“But
was she happy about the marriage?” Cindy needed a definite reply.

“Yes,
she was,” Dr. Boden finally concluded. “And it’s also important to note that a
dangerous time for depressed patients is when the depression lifts and they
start to feel good. It’s not uncommon for them to suddenly turn at those times
and harm themselves.”

 “That
doesn’t make sense, though, does it?” asked Cindy.

“Not
superficially,” Dr. Boden replied, “but sometimes the realization of what
happiness feels like, and the horror at all the pain they’ve been in and time
lost, causes an unexpected response. It often feels more familiar and safer to
be depressed than to suddenly feel joy. Joy is threatening for many, they can’t
tolerate it well.” Dr. Boden spoke calmly, seemingly enjoying the conversation.

“But
I heard that Shari was quite happy when she was dating others.” Cindy decided
to throw him a left curve. “I heard that she dated a lot when she and Doug were
broken up, and that she enjoyed it.”

“Who
said that?” Dr. Boden was curious.

Cindy
was about to tell him, but then recoiled. “Someone who knew her for a long time,”
was all she would reply.

“There
are many ways of looking at Shari’s behavior.” He leaned forward toward Cindy
and spoke in a confidential manner. “Shari based her world around the man in
her life, something she and I worked on for a long time. It was difficult to
make her realize how important it was to have an identity and life of her own.”

Cindy
took a swift breath in. For a flashing moment she wished that Mattheus could be
here with her now, listening to Dr. Boden. Of course Mattheus would agree with him,
intellectually. But Cindy wondered if Mattheus would really get it, deep in his
bones.

 “Shari
craved the security a strong man could bring,” Dr. Boden continued. “Of course
that put her in a precarious position.”

“Are
you suggesting that’s an illness?” asked Cindy, irked. “It doesn’t sound so
unusual to me.”

“No,
of course it’s not unusual,” said Dr. Boden, “but when Shari didn’t feel secure
with the man in her life, her moods began to swing.”

“That’s
not good,” Cindy agreed, realizing how common that was.

“It’s
never good to depend so fully on someone else for your own sense of balance and
well-being,” he said calmly. “People change, life brings challenges.”

“Are
you suggesting Shari wasn’t feeling secure with Doug when they were down here
looking for wedding venues?” Cindy was right on it.

“I
have no idea what she was feeling at the time she jumped,” Dr. Boden replied,
“I wasn’t here. But mostly, she did feel safe with Doug and that’s why we all
thought she was ready for marriage and that he was an excellent choice.”

It
seemed clear that Dr. Boden had made up his mind that her death was a suicide.

“You
seem certain that Shari jumped,” Cindy commented.

“Yes,
of course,” he replied without hesitation. “Given Shari’s history and the
mixture of feelings she must have felt upon actually committing to a wedding
venue, I believe the illness got the better of her. When people get close to
getting what they want, it’s not unusual for them to suddenly sabotage their
happiness. I see it all the time.”

Cindy
couldn’t help but think of Mattheus. Was that what he was doing? Was she doing
that, as well?

“Why
did you ask me if I were certain that Shari jumped?” Dr. Boden seemed troubled
by Cindy’s question. “What else could have happened to her?”

Cindy
searched her mind quickly to find a suitable answer. She realized that at this
point there was no way she could build a case for foul play. There was no solid
evidence and no one was a viable suspect. Of course Edward suspected Deidre,
but there was absolutely no evidence backing that up. Then, suddenly, Cindy
flashed upon something.

“Did
you know there’s recently been a small crime spree in Aruba? Two young women
were killed here a few months ago,” Cindy declared. “Case went cold. Suspect
still not apprehended.”

Dr.
Boden seemed momentarily stunned. “No, I hadn’t heard it,” he finally said,
“but that seems farfetched. Has there been any evidence at all pointing to
Shari being another victim? Any connection between the cases? No one’s even
suggested it.” He quickly stood up.

“I’ve
looked into it,” Cindy continued, matter-of-factly, happy to have something to
hang her hat on. “The suspect was thought to live in Amaneuten. I went down
there and talked to people. Right now he’s nowhere to be found but the people
down there are definitely nervous that he will strike again.”

“Why
haven’t I heard about this?” Now Dr. Boden seemed nervous as well.

“I
believe it’s easier for the police to lay low and consider it a cold case,”
Cindy quipped. “There are tons of them around, especially in Aruba.”

“But
what are the chances that something like that could have happened to Shari?”
Dr. Boden looked at Cindy intensely. “Were the other victims similar to her? Is
there some pattern repeating itself?”

“No,”
Cindy admitted quietly. “The other victims were two single women who came down
to Aruba to have a good time. They hung around at the clubs and casinos. From
what I understand Shari was accompanied by Doug wherever she went. Except on
her final walk the evening she died.”

Dr.
Boden breathed more easily. “Thank heavens for that,” he uttered.

“Thank
heavens?” Cindy replied softly. “Whether or not Shari was always accompanied by
her fiancé, her life also came to a terrible end.”

“Yes,
it did,” Dr. Boden agreed sadly. “And for that I feel deep regret. But I
strongly urge you not to mention these other victims to the family. The idea of
Shari being murdered would make her loss so much more difficult to bear.
There’s no reason to bring that possibility into the picture without strong
evidence to back it up. When I explain to the family that Shari’s illness took
her, that’s more manageable for them, somehow. I explain that depression can be
like an emotional cancer. It’s something they can get their minds around.”

Dr.
Boden’s comments made sense, were well thought out and compassionate. There was
only one thing wrong with them. They weren’t concerned with what actually
happened, only with the best way to help the family recover from the shock. But
whether her family could bear it or not, Cindy’s first responsibility was to
find out what actually took place that horrible night.

There
seemed little more to go over at the moment. “I really appreciate your time,”
Dr. Boden said, obviously eager then for the interview to end. “It’s been my
pleasure to help you.”

Before
she left, though, Cindy wanted to hear his conclusion just one more time. “So,
in your expert opinion,” Cindy repeated, “you would say that Shari took her own
life?”

“I
do believe that’s what happened,” Dr. Boden responded, looking at Cindy closely.
“Why are you so reluctant to believe that?”

Cindy
was surprised that her reluctance was so clear. “I’m working for Shari’s
father,” she responded. “I’m committed to finding out the truth.”

“But
you seem unwilling to even accept the possibility that Shari took her own
life,” Dr. Boden repeated, an edge of exasperation in his tone.

In
a flash Cindy realized that he was correct.

“That’s
true,” she conceded. “At the moment I have nothing tangible to base it upon
either, just something I’m sensing, that keeps getting stronger.”

Dr.
Boden’s eyes opened with interest. “What?”
“There’s a lie going on here,” Cindy said boldly. “I don’t know what it is, I’m
not sure who’s telling it, but the entire truth isn’t out.”

“The
entire truth is never out,” Dr. Boden remarked, “and maybe it doesn’t have to
be. The truth always has layers wrapped up around it. It can take years to
understand why someone would do something so horrific at such a joyous time in
their life.”

“It
can take years,” said Cindy, unconvinced, “or the truth can come out in a
flash. I’ve seen it appear in a second, just when you least expect it.”

“You’re
a fascinating woman, Cindy.” Dr. Boden smiled at her slowly. “If I ever need a
detective, you’re the only one I’d ever call.”

Cindy
was grateful for his appreciation and smiled back in return. “CM
Investigations,” she quipped. “I work with my partner, Mattheus. This isn’t a
job you’d want to do alone.”

*

Despite
Dr. Boden’s caring and intelligent manner, Cindy left the room feeling even
more doubtful about Shari’s death. She wished she could talk to Mattheus about
it, but it was clear that he wasn’t in that state of mind. Cindy figured she
needed at least two more days on the case to get the certainty she needed. That
was more than she and Mattheus had planned for, but what else could she do now?
She was in too deep, and if Shari had been murdered, the one who did it was
still at large, roaming around. Who knew who else might eventually be in
danger? Who could say that the person wouldn’t strike again? If that happened
and Cindy didn’t do her best now, she couldn’t live with the guilt of it on her
head.

*

When
Cindy got back to the hotel, to her relief, Mattheus was waiting for her in the
lobby. Cindy went over to him as if nothing had happened, and reached out her
hands for his.

Mattheus
stood up slowly. “I thought you’d be gone forever by now,” he said.