Death of a Pumpkin Carver (13 page)

My friend Mona popped by the house the other day for a cup of coffee. She timed her arrival because she knew I was making pumpkin muffins when she called earlier. Mona loved my muffins. She eagerly slathered one with a healthy scoop of cream cheese and gobbled it down. Mona had been eating these muffins ever since we were little girls and my mother was the one making them. Thankfully, Mom was willing to part with her secret recipe once I got married, and I've been happily baking them ever since. It was a much better wedding present than the toaster oven she bought for us that wasn't even on our registry but that's another story.

As much as I love pumpkin muffins, there was a time when I vowed never to make another batch as long as I lived. It was some years back when Danny and I were still married and I spent two whole days whipping up batch after batch of muffins for the town bake sale held every year in the lobby of the town office. The money raised from the event was donated to the Bar Harbor Pet Pantry, which helped people feed their pets during the cold, harsh winter months.

Being an enthusiastic animal lover, I was more than happy to take part and sell my pumpkin muffins mostly because it was for such a worthy cause. However, I have to admit there was a small part of me that yearned to finally win Town Baker of the Year. The way it worked was whoever brought in the most money for their baked goods at the end of the two-hour sale had their portrait taken by a local photographer and their picture would hang for a whole year in the town office lobby.

I had been secretly dying to win this award for what seemed like forever, but for the last five years since entering the contest, I was constantly edged out by Karen Applebaum, a food writer for the
Bar Harbor Herald
. Karen fancied herself as Bar Harbor's go-to recipe expert, our local version of Julia Child, and despite my best efforts, Karen somehow always came out on top. This year, my ego refused to accept another defeat so I prepared like Rocky did for his big boxing match by baking and baking throughout the night until I had over two hundred muffins carefully placed in tins. I knew in my gut it was a winning recipe and I had the numbers. There was no way I could lose.

Stacking the tins in the back of my car, I drove over to the town office where everyone was already busy setting out their baked goods on assigned tables. I noticed Karen Applebaum was going to compete with her locally famous cherry pies. They all looked delicious but I was still feeling bullish about my muffins. Karen caught me staring. She gave my muffins a dismissive glance and looked away with a little condescending laugh.

She was trying to psych me out. Chip away at my confidence. But I was not going to allow that to happen. And as the townspeople began streaming in, many making a beeline for my muffins, I was confident I could pull out a win.

I put Mona in charge of grabbing more tins from the car as needed while I handled the cash transactions. With only a half hour left to go in the sale, I looked down to see just two muffins left. I was on a roll!

“Mona, I have two more tins in the back of my car! You better go get them!”

They were my reserve stash.

In case I needed them at the last minute to get me over the top.

Mona ran outside, but returned moments later, empty-handed.

Time was ticking.

“Where are the muffins?” I screeched.

“Your car's gone,” Mona said.

“
What
?”

I noticed a last-minute surge at Karen Applebaum's table as a gathering crowd plucked the last of her cherry pies.

I needed those muffins stat!

I ran outside with Mona and sure enough my car was nowhere to be found. There was a red Volkswagen in the space where I had left it.

“Who would steal my muffins?”

I guess I should have been more concerned about the car but I was too consumed with my Town Baker of the Year title slipping through my fingers.

In the end, Karen Applebaum squeezed out a victory, but only by a few dollars. I vowed to take her down next year!

By the way, my car wasn't stolen. For once in his life, my husband, Danny, decided to surprise me and do an errand the first time I asked him instead of taking a day or two to get to it, which was his usual modus operandi. He had walked to the town office and taken the car across the street to the Shop 'n Save to do some grocery shopping before driving back across the street to pick me up and drive me home after the bake sale.

I should have been thrilled to discover the car was not stolen but I was inconsolable. When I got home I drowned my sorrows with a few Adult Pumpkin Milkshakes.

Yes, they're as delicious as they sound!

 

Ingredients
¼ cup softened butter
½ cup sugar
¼ cup brown sugar
2 eggs, lightly beaten
2 tablespoons molasses
2 tablespoons grated orange peel
⅔ cup canned pumpkin
½ cup buttermilk
2 cups flour
1 teaspoon baking soda
½ teaspoon baking powder
1 teaspoon pumpkin pie spice
¼ teaspoon salt

 

Streusel Topping
Ingredients
⅓ cup flour
3 tablespoons brown sugar
2 tablespoons cold butter

 

In a large mixing bowl cream together your butter and sugars until fluffy. Beat in the pumpkin, buttermilk, eggs, molasses and orange zest.

In a separate bowl combine the flour, baking soda, baking powder, pumpkin pie spice, and salt. Slowly add to the pumpkin mixture just until blended.

Fill your paper-lined or greased muffin tin ⅔ full.

 

In a bowl combine your flour and sugar. Add your cold butter and cut it in until the mixture is crumbly. Sprinkle the mixture over the tops of your muffins.

Bake in a preheated 375-degree oven for 20 to 25 minutes or until a toothpick comes out clean. Remove from oven and cool for about five minutes, then remove them from the pan and cool on wire rack.

Ingredients
2 cups of your favorite vanilla ice
cream
½ can pumpkin puree
3 ounces of your favorite bourbon
⅓ cup half-and-half
2 tablespoons maple syrup
½ teaspoon pumpkin pie spice

 

Place all your ingredients in a blender and blend well, then pour into frosty glasses and indulge yourself with this soothing treat with a kick!