Defying Destiny (41 page)

his protection as Guardian. Then again,

with the last of the Hunters placated, they

wouldn’t be in any real physical danger.

He still remembered the mental anguish

Cort had felt after he’d returned from

dealing with the Hunters. Cort had killed a

ten-year-old human boy in their attack.

That had brought him far more anguish

than the deaths of their father and

grandfather. Surely Rella wouldn’t want

herself or her children to be subjected to

such a reality, for without Nash’s

protection, one of them would eventually

kill a human. “What is Rella thinking?”

“She’s thinking about her future,

Nash,” Stacia said. “Forget about this

foolish tryst of yours and take Rella as

your mate.”

“Foolish tryst?” Nash scowled at his

mother. “Is that what you think my

relationship with Maralee is? Just a

temporary affair?”

Stacia scoffed. “What else can it be?

She’ll live another fifty years, if that, and

you have another two hundred to go. What

do you plan on doing after she gets old

and frail and you’re as young and vigorous

as ever?”

“Take care of her,” he said. “Maybe

you don’t believe this, but I love her,

completely, madly, deeply. She is the part

of me that had been missing until now.

That will never change, not even if she

does die long before I do.”

Stacia’s eyes narrowed. “You make

me sick,” she snarled. “How could you?

How could you fall in love with a
filthy

human?”

“And why do you hate humans so

much?” Nash countered. “No one else in

this pack loathes them the way you do.”

Stacia stood up from the table, as

angry as he was now. “I don’t have to

explain myself to you.”

Nash stood up as well. “I don’t

understand you, Mother. You were never

this way with Cort.” He slammed his fist

on the table, rattling the dishes.

“Don’t bring your brother into this. He

has nothing to do with any of it and he’s

no longer here to defend his position.”

“Why don’t you finish that thought?”

Nash said, his voice hard as steel, his

eyes narrowed.

“What do you mean?” Stacia asked,

meeting his eyes unflinchingly.

“He’s no longer here because I failed

to protect him.”

For a moment Stacia seemed to realize

her words wounded her surviving son

more than he let on, but then she didn’t

seem to care. “That’s right, you didn’t

protect him and now I stand to lose not

only my son, but also my grandchildren

because you always hesitate.”

“So you do think I’m a failure.”

Stacia sighed heavily and shook her

head. “No, Nash, I don’t think you’re a

failure. You shoulder so much more than

the rest of us. Sometimes I wish that you

didn’t bear the burden of the crescent on

your forehead.”

Nash suddenly remembered his reason

for coming here in the first place. “And

why do I bear the mark of the Wolf

Guardian?”

Stacia glanced up at him, her eyes

wide and afraid. “It’s left to chance I

suppose,” she whispered slowly.

“Really?” Nash asked skeptically.

“It’s not because I’m half Wolf and half

human?”

Stacia sat down heavily, the flush of

anger that had stained her cheeks faded

until she was as pale as alabaster. “H—

how did you find out?”

Nash’s ears rang and a sudden

weakness made him wobbly. He dropped

into the chair across from her. Surely,

he’d heard her wrong. “You mean, it’s

true?”

She nodded wordlessly, tears flowing

freely. The enormity of the situation

pressed down on Nash from above. How

could he be half-human? His parents were

both Wolves, unless…

“Which of you strayed?” he asked

angrily. “Was it you? Or was it father?”

He looked up at her, pinning her with a

hard stare. “It had to be you, because
you

gave birth to me.”

She

was

trembling—his

strong,

independent mother, suddenly as weak as

kitten. “It wasn’t like that. I loved your

father. You know that.”

“Then how?”

She shook her head, stood up, took

several running steps towards her

bedroom. Nash jumped to his feet, caught

her by the shoulders and spun her around

to face him.

“Tell me!”

She looked up at him, and he was

surprised to see her eyes brimmed with

tears. She bit her lip, a haunted look on

her face. “Your father and I were on a

hunt,” she said hesitantly. “While your

father was scouting the area, I took a bath

in a stream and was lying in the sun to dry,

when men,
human
men found me.” She

closed her eyes and shuddered. “You

know a Wolf cannot shift in front of a

human. I was stuck in my human form.

Defenseless. I guess they assumed because

I was naked I was willing to…willing

to…” She swallowed hard several times.

She seemed to be forcing herself not to

vomit. “There were six of them, I couldn’t

stop them, they all…they all…”

Nash pulled her into his embrace,

stroking her hair.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered.

“They raped me,” she said hollowly.

“Many times—I’m not sure how many

times—and then they tried to kill me, but I

didn’t die. I couldn’t die. I don’t know

how many times they stabbed me. God, I

wanted to die, and then my husband came

back and he found me like that, with those

disgusting humans. He…he…went crazy.

He killed all of them.”

“I’m sorry,” he whispered again. He

didn’t know what else to say.

She was silent for a long moment.

“Your father and I kept it a secret,” she

said, “and when it became apparent I was

pregnant, we tried to convince ourselves

the child was his. But after nine weeks I

was barely showing, not even close to

being ready to whelp. When I didn’t give

birth, we hid my pregnancy as well. Only

your brother and your father knew I was

pregnant for over nine months. You were

born human.”

“I was born human?” His kind was

always born in their Wolf forms. They

couldn’t even shift into their human form

until their eyes were fully open. Both he

and his mother were trembling now. Nash

wasn’t sure which one of them was

supporting the other, but he sought the sofa

and urged his mother to sit down beside

him before they both collapsed.

“I hated you when you were born,” she

admitted. “I wanted to kill you, but your

father took you from me. He cared for you

for several months by himself before you

were able to take your Wolf form and I

was able to accept you were my son.”

“Then my father isn’t really—”

“Don’t say that, Nash,” Stacia

interrupted. “You may not have been of

his flesh, but you were definitely of his

heart. He loved you as his own.”

Nash was a chaotic jumble of

emotions. To know of the circumstances

of his conception, to realize that his own

mother had wanted him dead, to hear that

the wonderful man who had raised him

was not his real father, to understand he

was not the Wolf he’d believed he was;

all of it was simply too much for him to

absorb.

“I hoped you would never find out,”

Stacia said.

He nodded tersely. “Thank you for

telling me the truth,” he said and stood up.

He had to keep it together in front of her.

He didn’t want her to know how upset he

was by her story. “I should be going home

now,” he said. “Maralee will be

worried.”

Stacia winced at the sound of her

name, but at least now Nash understood

why his mother hated humans. He let

himself out of the house and just as he was

about to close the door, his mother called

after him.

“Don’t forget to talk to Rella,” she

called. “You have to stop her from taking

my grandchildren away.”

It was just another stone on the wall

crushing him from above. He nodded and

closed the door. If Maralee hadn’t been

his keystone, he knew the wall would

have tumbled down on top of him by now.

“I was getting worried about you,”

Maralee said as Nash entered the house.

He said nothing as he removed his

coat and hung it on the hook near the door.

“Nash?”

“I’m sorry,” he said, breathlessly. He

glanced at her, his forced smile torturous.

“My mother needed me to do a few chores

around the house. You know how mothers

are.”

She didn’t, but she nodded in

understanding. “I kept your lunch warm. I

hope you’re hungry.”

He shook his head. “She talked me

into staying to eat with her. You know

how mothers are.”

She didn’t, but she nodded in

understanding. “I guess I’ll eat alone

then,” she said. There was a strange

sadness between them. It was radiating off

him and filling her heart as well.

“I’ll sit and talk with you while you

eat,” he said.

She smiled and turned towards the

kitchen. She fixed herself a plate from the

food on the stove while Nash sat down at

the table. She sat across from him, eating

slowly and silently, waiting for him to

speak. She could tell he needed to talk and

she didn’t want to dissuade him by rattling

on about nonsense.

“I guess some of the puzzling things

that happened when I was young make

sense now,” he murmured. “My mother

would get so angry with me, out of the

blue, for no reason at all. I always tried so

hard not to upset her, to stay out of her

way as much as possible. When she’d get

like that, father would always say, ‘It’s

not his fault, Stacia.’ and then he’d take

me away for a while and we’d do

something special together, just the two of

us. Cort would have Mother calmed down

by the time we returned. He was the only

one who could placate her. Cort could do

no wrong, and I could never do anything

right.

It was then I first started resenting

being born the Wolf Guardian. My father

made me realize I had a duty—an

obligation. ‘You were given to us for a

reason, Nash,’ he’d tell me. ‘Don’t ever

forget what that crescent stands for. You

were born to protect us. Only you can

save us from ourselves.’ He was the one

who always pushed me to break the curse,

as if it was his duty to steer me down the

right path. It’s strange that he was the one

who took me under his wing, when he

wasn’t even my real father.”

Maralee had been watching his face as

he spoke. His emotions were written so

clearly there: bitterness, nostalgia, pride,

and now pain. “I didn’t realize,” she

murmured.

He emitted a sound that was half

laugh, half snort. “Me neither.”

“Is this why you went to your mother’s

this morning? To find out about your

father?”

“When I was reading this morning I

discovered that the last Guardian was

born with the crescent moon marking

because he was half-human. I didn’t really

believe that was why I had been born with

it, but my mother confirmed it. I’m not

Wolf, I’m not human, I’m something
else
.”

“That doesn’t matter—”

“How can you say it doesn’t matter?”

he asked her angrily, focusing on her face

for the first time.

“It doesn’t matter to me,” she

whispered. “I love you for who you are,

not what you are.”

He shook his head in denial and stood

up. “I need to go talk to my father for a

little while.”

“Your human father?” she questioned,

confused.

“No. The one who raised me.”

“Can I come with you?” she asked,

standing. She wanted to be there for him if