Authors: Lisa Renee Jones
He returns and steps in front of me. “In bed or out, sweetheart?”
“Kayden. I'm serious.”
“As am I. In bed, you always have the ultimate power, no matter how much I seem to claim for myself. Out of bed, safety dictates everything.”
“Can I really come and go as I please? Because it didn't seem like it today.”
“Today was complicated, and in hindsight, I handled it like shit and I'm sorry.”
The apology, spoken by a man I do not think apologizes to anyone, surprises me in all of the right ways.
“In explanation, not defense,” he continues, “Gallo talking trash about me to you fucked with my head. And I don't let much fuck with my head. You are not a prisoner, nor have you ever been. You are not my captive, nor do I want you to be. But protecting you isn't just a desire. If you're to be here with me, it's a need. I need you safe.” He closes the small space between us and lifts my hand from on top of the car, revealing the bracelet, but he doesn't look at it. He looks at me, holding my stare, and letting me see the truth in his words. “This sends a powerful message to anyone who is, or who would be, my enemy. It says if they so much as look at you wrong, I will kill them. It says that you are mine, and even Niccolo will think twice before he touches The Hawk's woman.”
“Your woman,” I repeat, heat radiating up my arm from where he holds me. “Is that what I am?”
“Not until you say you are. Not until you wear the bracelet by choice, not public need. I want nothing you don't give me freely, Ella.”
“The bracelet tells the world that you own me,” I repeat, a tight knot of emotion in my chest. “Does it tell them that I own you?”
He pulls me to him and cups my head. “You do own me, Ella. The good, the bad, and the very damn ugly. And my worst fear is that you can't handle that. That's why I didn't come to you tonight. But I need you to handle it. Do you understand? I
need you
to be able to handle it.” He kisses me, hard and fast, but it is passionate and deep, a short taste of torment and ecstasy, before he tears his mouth from mine.
He turns me to face the open passenger seat, his hands bracketing my waist, his mouth at my ear as he says, “Get in the car, before I pull your dress up and fuck you right here in the garage, which would be far more appealing than this party, which we can't miss.”
I inhale on what has become his confession, and that is the trust that has me climbing into the car, breathing a little easier. And once I'm there, I look to my right, where he still stands, staring down at me, his gaze half veiled. His attention is like a warm blanket on a cold night. Heavy and addictive. He shuts the door and walks around the car, climbing inside with me, and I have this sense of us being together more than ever before. As if choices have been made, choices that will all end with us, here, tonight.
K
ayden cranks the engine and turns on the heat. “I have a gift for you,” he announces, unbuttoning his jacket to reach inside, and produces a small leather pouch the size of a makeup bag.
My eyes light as he hands it to me, the steely weight familiar in my hands. “I know what this is, and it's perfect.”
“You do, huh? What is it?”
I unsnap the pouch and remove the small handgun, fitting it in my small palm. “A Ruger LCP. Small enough for a bra strap and a garter. I freaking love it. Charlie just got retired.”
“Who the hell is Charlie?”
I face him. “I remembered my father's name today. He was Charlie, and I named my Glock after the man who taught me to shoot.” I hold up the Ruger, and right then my memory produces an image of my mother. “This is Annie,” I say. “My mother, whose name I remembered just this second.” I settle the Ruger on top of my lap. “Kayden, I'm starting to remember and it's really exciting and scary. Just random thingsâlike I could say, this is my favorite gun or food or movie, and know it's right. I didn't think like that before today.”
“Why exactly is that scary?”
“Because,” I say, my tone turning somber, “I, too, need you to be able to handle the good, the bad, and the very damn ugly if there is some. And I'm pretty sure there will be.”
“Nothing is going to change how I feel about you,” he says, taking my hand and kissing my knuckles. “Nothing, Ella.”
“Yet when I say that to you, you don't believe me.”
He studies me for several moments. “I guess we both need to have a little faith in who we are together.”
“It's hard, isn't it?”
“Nothing worth havingâ”
“Comes easily.”
Approval lights his eyes. “Exactly.”
“Marabella told me she used to say that to you.”
“Marabella has said a lot of wise things to me over the years,” he says, releasing my hand to pull his sleeve back again.
This time when I see his watch, I flash back to the memory I had in the shower. A man's wrist. That watch just below a starched white shirt and jacket sleeve. His hand on my bare arm.
“Donati should be arriving right about the same time as us,” Kayden says, shifting back into his seat.
I blink back into the moment. “You know when the police chief is going to arrive?”
“Friends in high and convenient places,” he says, hitting the remote above his visor to lower the wall behind us.
I turn to watch it slide away, in awe of this modern feature in the historical architecture. “I still can't get over how cool that is.”
“Remind me to show you how to get to the visitors' garage.” He backs up and turns the car toward the exit ramp, then faces the car forward as the wall slides back into place.
“There's a second garage?”
“That's right,” he says. “Visitors, like Carlo yesterday, have a separate parking area and entry point.”
“Some would say you're paranoid.”
“Not paranoid enough,” he says, driving us into a cloudless, dark night. “Otherwise Enzo would be alive right now.
Raul
is lucky he's not dead right now, but he will pay for what he did.”
“Good,” I hiss, remembering the moment Nathan set those paddles down and declared Enzo dead. “What are you going to do?”
“He's a fucking drug dealer,” he says, driving toward the gate that's now sliding open. “Once I'm done with him, I'm going to get him the hell out of my territories and make him wish he never came.”
“Are you doing a hunt for him?” I ask as he pulls onto the road and shuts the gate behind us.
“He thinks I am.” He glances over at me. “And you know what for.”
“The necklace,” I say, my throat tightening. “Did he know about me?”
“No, and as of now, he has no information to aid our search for the necklace, either. He just wants to get to it before Niccolo does.”
“Everyone wants what I held in my hands,” I say, checking the safety on my new gun. “Thank you again for this little piece of cold comfort.” I bypass the pouch and zip it inside my purse. “And the purse and clothes.”
“Don't thank me,” he says, turning onto a narrow road lined with cars. “Every one of those things was for me.”
My lips curve. “The purse was for you?”
“It's where you just put Annie, right?”
“Gucci does hold her quite nicely,” I say, stroking the lacy front. “I love this purse almost as much as I do her.”
“And you learned to shoot Annie from your father?”
“No,” I say, my brow dipping at the certain answer that isn't supported by memory. “I think . . . it feels like a Ruger was the personal weapon I carried. I'm actually surprised I wasn't carrying it the night you found me.”
“You wouldn't have legally been able to carry, as an American.”
“No. I suppose not. Still, I think I had a gun.” I shake off the thought and change the topic. “Before we get to the party, Marabella told you about Gallo and Giada, I heard.”
“Yes.” He shifts gears and turns down yet another narrow road, where pedestrians force him to slow to a crawl. “And Matteo's initial search shows no call records, but he's digging deeper.”
“That makes no sense, Kayden. Marabella said he was holding Giada's waist.”
“It could be that he was trying to seduce her,” he says, moving past the pedestrians and cutting me a quick look. “But I tend to agree. I have men following both of them.”
“I talked to her today.”
“Adriel told me, and it was quite the conversation, I hear.”
I cringe. “I was hard on her, and I spoke for him. I didn't mean for him to hear it.”
“You said what I hadn't, out of respect for Adriel.”
“And I guess I didn't exactly respect that boundary.”
“I'm fucking happy as shit about it, too. It needed to be said. And Adriel is relieved.”
“Well, that's interesting to know,” I say. “He's hard to read and like I said, he hasn't been overly receptive to my presence.”
“You can thank Giada for that,” he says. “She's been nothing but a pain in the ass that distracts him, so he doesn't, or he didn't, see how you could be anything but a distraction to me.”
“Didn't?”
“He thought you'd go âGiada' on me today due to Enzo's death last night, but instead you fought for me and him.” We turn onto a double-laned street lined by sidewalks, and he adds, “But you should have told me he was giving you trouble.”
“I won't win anyone's respect by your demanding it. I have to earn it myself.” My eyes light on a massive white building with a red carpet in front and cars everywhere. “Is that where we're going?”
“That's the party,” Kayden confirms, then cuts down a small street and parks by the curb.
“What are we doing?” I ask, the dim streetlight illuminating his stark expression.
“Every reason I've given you for bringing you to this party was true.”
“But?”
“The group sponsoring this party is a powerful consortium that's behind much of the fractured state of the Italian government. They want the power themselves, and are controlled byâ”
“Niccolo,” I supply. “What is going on? Why are
we
here?” A bad feeling consumes me and I try to withdraw, but he catches my arm.
“Hear me out, Ella. There is nothing happening here that you don't decide to make happen. My stopping here, now, is about giving you the power to decide if we go to the party. This is your choice. You
always
have a choice.”
“If that were true, you'd have explained this so-called choice before we were sitting in a car right by the party.”
“That's not true. I did it this way because decisions that come with fear are easier made when you're one step from the fire. You are the kind of person who will stand by the flames and be empowered, instead of cowering.”
“Is Niccolo the fire, Kayden, or are you?”
“I am the man who wants to keep you alive and by my side. If that makes me the fire, then yes, I am the fire.”
“Is Niccolo here?”
“Niccolo does not attend political events, nor is he on the guest list tonightâor we would not be. He controls the puppets inside, and many of his loyal followers will be present. And if you really know Niccoloâ”
“I know him. Someone close to him will be here. They will see me and us. This isn't hiding in plain sight. This is inviting Niccolo to find me.”
“Yes, they will. And that's the point.”
M
y fingers curl into my palms. “I don't even know how to process what you just said to me. No part of my mind can find a path to why you would want Niccolo to find me. Because âhide in plain sight' seems to have become âknock on Niccolo's door.'â”
“Hiding in plain sight worked when I thought you were a random person who'd stumbled into Niccolo's line of fire. In that scenario, the interest in you would have faded. But now we know you're more than that.”