Desert Rain (13 page)

Cruel.

I was fifteen when Beth was born, he continued. Jan had been a model in some of the better
Palm Springs stores before she got pregnant. When Beth was two months old, Jan went back
to modeling.

Numbly, Holly waited, listening. Enduring.

Jan liked the money that the ranch was finally bringing in, he said, but she didnt like
the ranch itself. She ignored Beth. She didnt even like Dad to hold his daughter. All I
can figure is that Jan was jealous of her own kid.

Holly looked down at her hands. They ached from being clenched together to keep from
touching Linc. She wanted to hold him, to comfort him, to love him. She wanted to wave a
magic wand and make the ugly past vanish so that it couldnt throw grotesque shadows over
the future.

Her future.

Their future.

But it was too late for that. It had been too late before Holly was even born.

I pretty much raised Beth, Linc said. Jan was too obsessed with her looks to see anything
or anyone else, and Dad

Linc stopped talking abruptly. Then he shrugged again. The movement was tight, as though
he was shifting a load he had carried so long he no longer noticed its weight.

Dad drank a lot by then, he said. I took over more and more of the ranch. Jan spent more
and more time in front of the mirror, looking for the first wrinkle, and Dad found the
bottom of a lot of bottles.

Holly swallowed against the tears that were choking her.

And the fear.

Somewhere along in there, Linc said, Jan started having men on the side. Dad didnt admire
her enough, I guess. I sure as hell didnt admire her as much as she wanted, even when she
walked into my room dead naked late one night.

Holly made a small sound, but he didnt hear. His face was utterly cold, rigid with
contempt.

Jan was a real bitch, he said coolly. When she couldnt get Dad and me to fight over her,
she started bragging about her men to us, giving us all the details. And I mean all of
them.

Holly made a ragged sound that was Lincs name. He didnt hear. He was lost to her, caught
in the past. One night Jan picked up the wrong man, Linc said. He slapped her around, she
called Dad, and he

went to get her. On the way back home Dad lost control of the car on a bad curve.

For the first time Lincs eyes focused on Holly.

Your parents were killed because my stepmother was a slut all the way to her corrupt soul.
If she hadnt died in that crash, Id have killed her myself. She wasnt worth one tear on
your face,nin‡ . Not then, not now.

Im not crying for her, whispered Holly.

Blindly she went to Linc, buried her face against his chest, and held on with a strength
that surprised both of them.

Tomorrow, she said in a choked voice, tomorrow please dont hold those women against me.
You arent like them. Remember that. And you arent like your father. Youre strong. He
wasnt. Holly

No, she interrupted desperately. You have to listen to me. Im not like your mother or
stepmother. You must believe that. Even when you see me tomorrow,you must believe that.

Lincs mouth moved gently over Hollys, tasting her tears.

Of course Ill believe it, he said.

Will you? she asked in a despairing voice, feeling empty and afraid. Oh, Linc, you dont
know how beautiful I can be.

Before he could answer, the phone rang in his office just off the master bedroom.

It must be Shadow Dancer again, he said. That particular phone is connected to the barn.

Holly nodded and let go of him.

Slowly he released her in turn and went to answer the phone. His voice carried easily to
her, for the office was connected to the master bedroom just across the hall from her.

Whats that? he said. Shadow Dancer is down again? What about the foal? Okay. Im on my way.
He hung up and started for the door. Once in the hall, he hesitated. Its all right, Holly
said. Go see to your mare. Id ask you to come with me, but it could be . . . difficult.

Go, she said softly. I understand. Linc gave her a searching look, nodded, and moved
swiftly away from her.

For a long time Holly stood motionless but for the tears running down her face, sensing
midnight coming at her like a runaway train.

There was nothing she could do but wait for it to hit. Time only ran one way, and it was
running out.

Holly, are you awake?

Beths voice brought Holly out of a restless sleep. She rolled over in the huge bed and
kicked off the comforter she didnt remember pulling over herself.

Im awake, Holly said.

Can I come in?

Sure.

Holly rubbed her neck, trying to take out the tension that knotted her tendons.

She felt awful. Her clothes were wrinkled and awry. She had fallen asleep while waiting
for Linc to come back from the barn. She had been determined to tell him that Holly was
also a model called Shannon.

But Linc hadnt come back.

Beth walked in, carrying a cordless phone. She took one look at Holly and stopped.

Are you awake enough to talk to your boss? Beth asked doubtfully.

Holly stretched, then rolled her head, trying to relieve the tension in her neck muscles.

Sure, why not? she said wearily.

She reached for the phone.

Beth put it on the bed and turned to leave. Stick around, Holly said. I may need first aid
when hes finished with me.

She smiled, but her voice was serious. She knew that Roger wouldnt be happy when he found
out where she was staying.

Camping alone was one thing. Living with a man was something else entirely.

Yesterday she had left a message at the hotel telling Roger that she could be reached at
the home of Lincoln McKenzie. She had also instructed that, until further notice, Roger
was to call her Holly. Period.

If anyone told Linc about Shannon, she didnt want it to be the tame Viking.

Are you supposed to be working? Beth asked. Is that why your boss will be mad?

No. Its just that Roger wont be happy to know Im with Linc.

Is Roger your boyfriend?

Holly shook her head.

He thought he wanted to be, she explained. He really doesnt, but I sometimes have a hard
time convincing him.

Will he fire you over Linc? Beth asked, wide-eyed.

Smiling again, Holly reached for the phone.

I doubt it, she said. Im too good at what I do. Roger will just be prickly for a while.

She flipped the switch that activated the receiver and the speaker. Beth would be able to
hear Roger as clearly as Holly could.

Hi, Roger, she said. Youre up early.

Its ten oclock in Manhattan. Ive been on the phone with Sandra since six, Roger said. How
was the camping trip?

Wet, stormy, and thoroughly wonderful. There was a distinct pause. Is the name Lincoln
McKenzie familiar to me? Roger asked. He manages Hidden Springs, she said, yawning.
Remember? I remember you said that there was nothing between you and that hard-eyed
cowboy. Beth smothered a giggle behind her hand, guessing that Linc was the hard-eyed
cowboy in question. Holly winked at her. I didnt think there was, she said. And there is
now? Yes. There was a long silence.

Then, softly Roger asked, Is he good for you?

Sudden tears tightened her throat. Roger was worried about her rather than angry with her.
He might want her as a lover, but he was also her friend.

Ive loved Linc since I was nine, Holly said simply. We were separated when my parents died
and Sandra brought me to New York.

First love. Bloody hell. Roger laughed curtly. Who can compete with that? Theres no
question of competition, she said. There never was. Ever. Are you sure? Frankly, he looked
like a pretty hard piece of business to me. Im sure.

Well, Roger said unhappily, as long as you still model for me, Ill try to be a good sport.

Roger, Id model for you even if I didnt have a contract. Not only do I like you, but you
also create the most incredible clothes in the world. Its exciting just to be around them.

Thank God. Its too late to replace you, Shaner, Holly. Id kill the model who tried. Roger
laughed, obviously pleased. And relieved.

When you get tired of living with the devil, he said, theres a fair-haired angel who will
be glad to lick your wounds.

Linc isnt a devil. From what I saw a few days ago, hell do until Old Nick comes along,
Roger said dryly. Roger, she began. But I didnt call to argue about McKenzies devilish
looks, Roger interrupted. Holly let out a soundless breath of relief. Okay, she said.
Whats up? Im putting off the Hidden Springs shoot for now. Why? Weather, he said
succinctly.

Holly frowned.

Were going to Cabo San Lucas instead, Roger said. The satellite forecast and the local
weather shaman assure me its hot, dry, and sandy there.

As opposed to hot,wet , and sandy here? she asked with a lightness she didnt feel.

Right.

Holly twisted the corner of her blouse between her fingers and wondered what to do. She
loved her work, but she didnt want to leave Linc.

Especially not now, with so much unresolved between them.

How much time before we leave and how long are we staying? she asked finally.

Well leave sometime in the next week, Roger said. I cant be more specific, because Im
having trouble choosing the male model.

What happened to the last pretty face? He had wonderful gray eyes.

He broke his wrist climbing rocks for a cigarette ad.

Holly just shook her head.

Im going to look at a few more models today, Roger said. If I dont see anything I like,
Ill try something new.

She grimaced. She remembered the last time he had tried something new.

No more dumb jocks, please, Holly said. Smart ones, yes.

Wheres your sense of adventure? That piece of beefcake youre referring to sold a lot of
jogging clothes.

He also kept tackling me, she said acidly.

So his eyesight was better than his IQ.

Have you thought of using Linc? Holly asked, only half joking.

Love must be blind.

Excuse me?

Lincoln McKenzie looks like your desert mountains, Roger said bluntly. Big, hard, and
definitely not for the uninitiated. I like to think my products are a bit more civilized.

Beth was caught between indignation and laughter. Laughter won. She buried her face in a
pillow. Whats that? he asked. Sounds like youre choking on a bite of toast.

Holly laughed softly.

That is Lincs younger sister, she explained.

Oops, Roger said. Sorry about that, love.

No problem. Beth thinks Linc can look pretty rough, too, but thats only when hes mad. The
rest of the time he is a pussycat.

Felis leo,no doubt, Roger said dryly. Ive seen his kind on safari in Africa. Or behind
bars. Safer that way.

Holly groaned and gave up.

At least come to the party were having tonight, she said.

Sorry, love, he said, meaning it. I dont think I can. Mrs. LAcararemember her, the Queen
of Diamonds?called and invited four models plus yours truly to come to a rodeo or some
such thing.

Holly blinked. Rodeo? Are you certain?

A horse auction, barbecue, and black-tie ball is how she described it. Naturally I
accepted. It sounded so terribly improbable and utterly American.

It also sounds like Ill be seeing you in a few hours, Holly said, looking toward Beth.

Beth nodded and whispered, Mrs. LAcara called yesterday and made arrangements for five
more.

Whats that? Roger asked.

Mrs. LAcara is bringing you to the McKenzies Arabian Nights gala, Holly explained.

Speak of the devil, murmured Roger. Well, Ill polish my best set of horns and give the old
boy his due.

Roger she began. All right, love. Thats my limit on sour grapes. I hope so. Save a dance
for me, beautiful lady. Roger hung up before Holly could answer. Your boss really likes
you, doesnt he? Beth asked. Hes a friend. No more. She smiled. And no less. Youll like
him, Beth. And I know hell like you. Why?

Roger always likes beautiful women. She yawned again. Whats on the agenda for the morning?
Lincs still with the mare. She keeps starting labor and then stopping. Poor Linc. Poor
everyone. Hell be in a lousy mood for the party.

He never was much for parties anyway, if I remember correctly, Holly said.

Thats not the worst of it, Beth said.

What could be worse than Linc in a snit?

Mrs. Malley called last night, Beth said. Her sister is in intensive care. I told her to
stay in Palm Springs.

Holly gave the girl a sidelong look.

Thats all right, isnt it? Beth asked anxiously. We can handle the party without the
housekeeper, cant we?

Looks like we get the chance to try, Holly said, smiling. Ill meet you in the kitchen in
ten minutes.

Out back, Beth corrected. Ill bring you some coffee and a bag of granola for breakfast. No
time for anything more.

That bad, huh?

That bad, Beth said ruefully.

Ten minutes later, freshly showered and dressed, Holly met Beth out back. Silently the
girl handed over the promised breakfast.

Munching granola and sipping coffee, Holly watched workmen. At the moment they were
swarming over the ballroom-sized platform that had been erected in the McKenzies huge
backyard. They were setting up an enormous black, red, and silver tent.

Holly looked at Beth. Rain expected? she asked. Yeah. What a pain.

Out beyond the pools extensive decks and plantings, two barbecue pits had been dug. A side
of beef and a whole pig were cooking slowly. The bartender had set up his station on the
side patio amid tubs of fragrant flowers.

Although the auction didnt begin until one oclock, people had been arriving since nine.
For the most part they stayed in the sales barn, checking out the horses.

Inevitably, some people were more interested in visiting than in buying horses.

Holly wasnt even halfway through her first cup of coffee before workmen began trotting up
to ask questions. Guests wandered up, interrupting with other questions.

Beth handled most of the guests. Holly handled most of the rest.

By noon Holly was frustrated and impatient. She had soothed caterers, chatted with
unwanted guests, acted as lifeguard at the pool for two children whose mother couldnt say
no, told another couple that their five poodles couldnt run free among the Arabians, and
generally tried to put out brushfires as they flared up.

She had done everything but see Linc, her own personal brushfire.

Each time she started for the foaling barn, a workman grabbed her and started asking where
to put this and what to do with that. She had to bite down hard on her first, irritated
responses about where to put everything.

By three oclock, Holly was determined to get to the barn no matter who tried to stop her.

She wasnt even out of the backyard when a hand grabbed her arm. She turned like a cat, not
bothering to hide the anger she felt.

Cant it wait? she snapped.

Then she saw Beths dismayed look.

Sorry, Holly said. I didnt know it was you. Ive been trying to see Linc since nine and
people keep grabbing my arm.

Thats why Im here, Beth said. He called from the barn. Shadow Dancer finally came through.

A live foal? she asked hopefully.

A filly. Mother and daughter are doing fine.

Thank God. Sometimes with such a long birth, the foal doesnt make it. Holly rubbed her
neck, working on knots. How did Linc sound?

Tired, Beth said. He apologized for losing his temper last night. I apologized, too. But .
. .

But?

It doesnt change how either one of us feels, does it? I mean, I still want to look older
than ten and he still wants me to look like a kid. It just isnt fair.

Not much is, Holly said wearily. Give Linc time, honey. He needs to learn that beauty isnt
beastly. Beth looked stubborn.

Does that mean you wont do my hair or makeup for the dance tonight? she asked. Of course
not. Eight oclock, as agreed. Beth held out her hand. Its a deal. Holly took the girls
hand firmly.

Partners in crime, Holly said in a wry tone. What crime is that? asked a deep voice behind
her. Stealing candy? She turned around and smiled rather warily at Linc. Dont ask unless
you want to suspend the truce again, she warned. I didnt want to suspend it last night. Im
sure as hell not up to a battle now. Yawning, Linc rubbed his hand through his hair. The
weariness in his face tugged at Hollys heart. She stood on tiptoe and kissed him gently on
the lips. Truce, then, Holly said. Im not feeling very feisty myself. He pulled her
closer. Bad nights sleep? he asked. Uh-huh. Thats what happens when you sleep alone, he
said too softly for Beth to overhear. The caterer called out to Holly from across the
yard. She ignored him. The man crossed the lawn toward her with quick, determined strides.
She groaned. Damn that creature. He clings like lint. Ill take care of it, Beth said,
heading for the man. Hes probably complaining about the kitchen again, Holly said. Only
one microwave. If he needed two microwaves, he should have brought one of his own. Thats
what I told him. Then hell get to hear it all over again. From a McKenzie! With a poise
and determination far beyond her years, Beth confronted the caterer.

Linc grabbed Hollys hand and pulled her toward the house. Together they tiptoed through
the kitchen and up the stairs, avoiding guests and workmen alike.

When they reached his bedroom, Linc put the cordless phone out in the hall and shut the
door. Then he stretched long and hard, flexing his back and arms.

Slowly he began to unbutton his shirt. He winced as he shrugged out of the long sleeves.

Holly remembered the storm, the lightning, Linc kicking free of a falling horse and
landing against stone.

Are you still sore? she asked.

Just stiff. Shadow Dancer was going to have that foal standing up or know the reason why.

Too bad you speak English instead of equine. You could have told her the score.

Smiling wryly, Linc flexed his back again.

She had it lying down, finally, he said. After a while, she got the hang of it and I could
let go of her head.

Holly measured the weariness lining his face. This isnt the time to bring up Shannon,she
thought unhappily.Linc is too tired to be rational about