Desiring A Demon (Archangels) (7 page)

“Oh, fuck yes. Deeper, deeper,” she chanted.

He plunged deeper, longer, faster, harder. He slowed down and simply pressed his body against hers while their hearts raced together. Then when she started to squirm he started up again. She grabbed his thighs and tightened her kegel muscles, making his eyes roll back in pleasure. He was so close. He released her and reluctantly pulled out.

“What’s wrong?” she asked.

He simply shook his head and flipped her over, urging her first to her knees then to rise up in front of him. She almost wasn’t tall enough but with a little maneuvering and the help of her pillows they made it work. He entered her slowly before tightening his grip around her waist. She reached back and wrapped an arm around his neck. The pace of their loving slowed but was no less potent. He cupped her breasts in both palms and fingered her nipples, gently pinching them. She gasped and rocked back against him.

“Mmm, this is perfect,” he whispered into her ear.

“Yesss.”

“I’ve wanted to touch you like this for so long.”

She sighed but didn’t reply to that one
,
and he wondered if she’d felt the same. His ardor had cooled as they repositioned but was now fueled back to roaring life. It wouldn’t take much longer and this time he was ready to let go and enjoy the orgasm working its way up his spine. He closed his eyes and gripped her hip with one hand, then quickened his pace. Each thrust drew him closer to paradise and he wanted her right with him when he reached it. He slipped his free hand down to the apex of her legs and found her throbbing center. She widened her thighs the slightest bit and gave him room to play.

It only took a few slow circles with the tip of one finger before she was clenching around his throbbing cock. She milked him and gave him the last bit of friction he needed to climax.

“Astaroth!”

He growled her name and held her tighter as he pumped his seed into her body. She clung to him
,
too
,
until long moments later when they both collapsed onto the mattress. She rolled into his open arms and he held her to his chest. The last thing he wanted to do was ever let her go.

“Asta, don’t ever leave me again.”

She sighed and kissed his chest, but didn’t voice a reply.

Chapter Six

Rafe’s racing heart slowed to normal against her ear and his skin cooled beneath hers. Nothing had ever felt more right than lying in this man’s arms, but the problem remained that he wasn’t just any man. Now that the deed was done, though, she couldn’t find it in her to regret it. Surely pleasure so intense only happened once in a lifetime. How could she regret him showing her how good it could be between them? There would be no regrets today. None, until it was time to move on and leave him and his pleasurable body behind.

The realization that they hadn’t used a condom hit her, and she had a moment of panic. Then she remembered a long-ago conversation with Isadora.

“Rafe?”

“Hmm?”

“You’re infertile
,
right?”

He stiffened against her
,
and his grip tightened for a moment. Then he released a slow breath. “Yes.”

What did his reaction mean? Was he happy or sad about not being able to give her a baby? She didn’t even know if she could get pregnant. Her last doctor’s visit had been in middle school, right before puberty hit her upside the head like a sledgehammer. Then her body had changed in horrifying ways
,
and she’d been reluctant to allow any doctor close. She hadn’t even seen a dentist in at least a decade nor had so much as a common cold. But she’d always been careful and used condoms as a rule. Those rules had flown out the window the second Rafe touched her.

Now she silently mourned the loss of something she hadn’t even realized she’d wanted. What the hell would she do with a baby anyway? The image of a small boy with light brown hair and blue eyes nearly brought tears but she fought them down. As fucked up as her life was at the moment, the last thing she needed would be to bring a kid into it. Even if it did give her a small part of Rafe to keep for a while. With her luck, he’d take the kid away as soon as it was born anyway. What did demons know about taking care of babies?

She closed her eyes against the pain of that thought and tried to bring back her afterglow. Rafe’s breathing steadied as he fell asleep, completely oblivious to her inner turmoil. She moved up onto one elbow to study him in the weak morning light fighting its way through the blinds. He was glorious. All sinuous muscle and sleek skin. Though a bit pale, he had a golden sheen only shared with his brothers. She wished his wings were unfurled. There really wasn’t anything sexier than a hot guy with wings.

She ran a hand lightly over his smooth chest, enjoying the dips between his muscles. Staring at them gave her a brief flashback
,
and she froze as memories began to slowly slide through her mind. A hot guy with long black hair. A
tall
hot guy with long black hair. He’d been muscular like Rafe but beefier, and mean. There was rage inside him fighting to get out…and he wasn’t fully human. Forge.

She gasped and grabbed her head, rolling away from Rafe as the memory of her meeting with Forge played through her mind. Pain shot from her temples to her toes and her blood began to boil. The tingling in her spine that preceded the last horrible episode in Rafe’s kitchen worked its way up and she rolled completely off the bed. She hit the floor with a thud and began crawling toward the door even as she expected Rafe to run to her side. But he didn’t. She made it into the hallway before the heat boiled through her. Steam flew out of her mouth and ears, tears burned her eyes, and she curled into the fetal position to wait out the pain.

Long moments later
,
she rolled onto her hands and knees. Silence rang through the house
,
and she slowly let it sink into her. The peace that always wafted from Rafe and his brothers penetrated the painful haze in her head
,
and she sat back on her legs to soak it in. Using the wall for balance, she stood and slowly staggered back into the room. Rafe slept on. She simply stared at him in wonder. How the hell had he slept through that? She closed her eyes and thought back through the episode and realized she hadn’t made much noise. Amazingly
,
he hadn’t woken when she fell off the bed. Now he remained oblivious to what she’d gone through…what she would keep going through unless she got some answers. Forge had only provided more questions but maybe he could somehow help her. If he was willing.

Rafe slept on as she took a quick shower before heading to the kitchen. She did her best thinking when she baked. Eventually
,
the scent of brownies filled the house. She heard footsteps approach and fought to calm her racing pulse. Rafe surprised her by pulling her into his arms when he walked into the kitchen. She should’ve expected it. All of the angels were very demonstrative of their feeling toward those they cared about and each other. But she hadn’t expected him to handle her as if they’d been sleeping together for months.

“What are you doing?” she asked.

He only pulled back far enough to see her face. “Holding you. Why, don’t you like it?”

Before she could answer
,
he dived in for a kiss and didn’t let her up for air for a while. Her pulse kicked into overdrive and she stood panting. “Yeah…yes. I do.”

“Good.”

He kissed her again, letting his palms slide down to grip her ass. He pulled her tight against the front of his body, leaving no doubt he was more than ready to have sex again.

“Rafe…wait.”

He froze and slowly relaxed his grip. Though he didn’t actually release her, she could easily escape if needed.

“What’s wrong?”

“Slow down, hot stuff. Can’t we talk for a minute?”

His face remained blank as he nodded and slowly let go. She stepped away even though it was the last thing she wanted to do.

“So…what’s up?” he asked.

She frantically searched her mind for something to talk about. “Uh…how’s Zerach? You haven’t told me anything about breakfast the other day.”

A fleeting look of surprise crossed his face
,
but he turned away and took a seat at the table. “He’s good. Isadora’s pregnant.”

Happiness filled her at the exciting news. “Oh wow, really?”

He nodded.

She smiled. “That’s amazing. I’ll bet they’re thrilled.”

“Yeah. He’s really excited about it.”

Her smile faded
,
and she started playing with a kitchen towel as he watched her. “Umm…”

“Asta.”

“Well…”

“Asta. Come here.”

Her gaze snapped to where he was lounged on a chair, arms open in invitation. She really wanted to take him up on it but hesitated.

“Rafe, I really don’t think—”

“No, don’t think. Come here.”

His draw was too hard to fight. She dropped the towel on the counter and walked over to him slowly. As soon as she was close enough, he grabbed her hips and settled her on one leg. Then he wrapped his arms around her as if afraid to let her go. She rested against him and her heart pounded in excitement and fear. What the hell was she doing?

“Rafe…this is never going to work. We can have sex, but that’s all it’s going to be. You know that, right?”

His chest moved beneath her as he took a deep breath and released it slowly. “What I know is you were gone for days without a trace. And when found, you were unconscious and unresponsive. I’ve never been so scared in all my existence, and having you in my arms, safe and sound, is the only thing that matters right now.”

She melted, inside and out, and had to struggle against her emotions. Tears burned the back of her throat but she fought them as she let his words sink in.

“How much longer on the brownies?” he asked.

“The timer should be going off any minute now.”

It buzzed right as she finished talking
,
and he released her. Once she’d removed the brownies and turned the oven off, Rafe pulled her back into his arms.

“Are you hungry?” he asked.

“No.”

“You sure?”

“Yeah.”

He wrapped one arm under her legs and lifted, then carried her back to bed. He set her down gently before pulling off his jeans. She admired his nakedness before reality intruded. “Rafe. We shouldn’t—”

“Shh. We’re going to sleep. The baggage under your eyes should be checked.”

An unexpected smile crossed her lips
,
and she relaxed into the mattress. “Okay.”

He started pulling off her clothes and she tensed again, but didn’t try to stop him. “I don’t usually sleep naked.”

“You do now. I don’t want anything between us.”

Part of her rejoiced at that announcement even as she scoffed. He’d pulled off her jeans and panties first before reaching for her shirt. “Rafe.”

Her voice was muffled as the cloth covered her face and once it cleared she froze at the shocked look on his face. “What?”

She looked down at her body to see her entire torso was now blood red. It stopped at her shoulders like a macabre T-shirt and covered her breasts. From there the stain went over her navel to end in a ragged line around her waist. Her chest squeezed and her breath became ragged as fear took over her emotions.

…

Rafe slowly sat on the edge of the bed and removed her bra. She made no move to stop him. He grasped her shoulder and moved her back and forth a bit so he could see how far the stain went. From collarbone to hipbone, her soft skin now held a crimson hue. Her once pink nipples were now a red so deep it was nearly black. It was the physical embodiment of her demon half, but he still thought her beautiful.

“This wasn’t here earlier,” he said.

“N-no. It wasn’t. Not even when I showered. But the tattoo had spread some already.”

Her quiet voice held true fear but no deception. That alone calmed him considerably. “I think it’s safe to call it a birthmark now, baby.”

Her hopeful gaze arrested him. “I know it’s disgusting—”

He put a finger over her lips. “Stop. Nothing about you disgusts me.”

A single tear tracked down her cheek
,
and he kissed it away. “We’ll figure this out together. Okay?”

“Okay.”

“Do you have any ideas on why it spread this time?”

She bit her lip and glanced away. He called on all his reserves of patience when he really wanted to rage. There were moments when he almost forgot her demon half. While he’d been making love to her it hadn’t mattered at all. He’d been so overwhelmed with her taste, scent, and softness, she could have been purple and he wouldn’t have noticed.

“No. I mean, I had an…
episode
while you were asleep. I guess that’s when it spreads. I’m sorry.”

“You have nothing to be sorry about, Asta. This isn’t anything you’re doing on purpose.”

“How can you trust me so much when no one else does? When I’m…tainted?”

“I don’t care about your demon half. Not as it applies to what’s between us.”

She pulled away from him and buried her face in a pillow.

“Asta.”

Her back shuddered as she cried and he moved further onto the bed slowly. He closed the distance and, when she didn’t protest, pulled her into his arms.

“We’ll figure this out together, Asta. I promise.”

“How? Do you have any ideas?”

He didn’t but didn’t want to confess his ignorance just yet. “I will.”

…

They rested together, him rocking her slightly in comfort. Asta wasn’t sure she deserved or should accept. But pulling away from him took more strength than she could muster. She was so tired of fighting his pull and the attraction between them. His solace was irresistible because he expected nothing in return and that was something she hadn’t experienced since she was an innocent little girl whose mother still loved her.

She pushed away painful thoughts of the past and snuggled into Rafe’s warmth. Then she drifted to sleep.

Asta looked into the cracked bathroom mirror as a scream caught in her throat. Her thirteen-year-old face stared back in horror at the image. Red streaks marred her light brown hair like blood dripping from her skull. Crimson veins ran over her forehead, pulsing with every heartbeat. A glance down proved the small black claws that had cut into her palms while she slept were still there…where they hadn’t been the night before. She was a monster. Gripping the edge of the sink, she fought the urge to throw up and concentrated on breathing.

A knock on the door startled her and she nearly screamed. Then her mom’s voice called out, “Breakfast is ready,” before her footsteps receded. How could she go out there like this? Tears blurred Asta’s vision and she started to pray, but where the words had caused comfort just hours ago they now burned her throat. Indescribable pain shot through her head and she fell to her knees. She sobbed and clutched her hair.

“God.” She choked on the word as the pain increased. There had to be a way to stop this.

Breathing through her nose slowly, she closed her eyes and concentrated on something good, something happy. She thought of her favorite stuffed animal, a black kitten her mom had bought for her. The image of the kitten filled her mind and slowly the pain eased. She curled her fingers in and realized she felt only her usual bitten-off nail stubs. After another full minute, she pulled herself up to face the mirror again.

The skin of her forehead was smooth and pale, with no more than the small scar at her hairline she’d gotten at age five. Her hair was almost back to normal, with the exception of a single streak of pink at one temple. It would have to do. After a couple of deep, calming breaths, she went to face her mom.

…

Rafe woke with a start and stared at the woman sleeping in his arms. He’d shared her dream. Something he hadn’t done with someone in almost a century, and then it had been deliberate
.
What did it mean that he’d slipped effortlessly and unintentionally into Asta’s mind?

She slept on as he thought of the scared teenager she’d been, completely unprepared for the demon half that manifested once she’d reached puberty. He wished he’d known her then and been around to comfort her. But would he have offered comfort? Or would he have captured her and taken her to the nearest priest for exorcism? He had no answer to that one. Eleven years ago was but the blink of an eye to him and his brothers but they’d changed in subtle ways. Eleven years ago he’d never have imagined sharing a bed with a demon. Now he couldn’t imagine sleeping without her.