Destiny (Vanish Book Four) (6 page)

“Oh, alright,” he looked down at the
grass.

“What’s wrong?” I wondered.

“I told you, I’m drawn to you, and no matter
where you are I feel like I need to be there. I don’t know why; I
wish I didn’t feel like this. For the first time, for a few
seconds—I felt whole.”

“If that’s the case, why weren’t you there
when we took down the Alliance? Why didn’t you help?”

“You and your friends took out the Alliance.
If you saw me there; I would have gone down with them.”

“Okay, I’m sorry, but I’m just not buying
this whole,
I need you
thing.”

I turned around and started walking away,
before I got far, he grabbed my hand and spun me around. He caught
me by the waist, and before I could do anything, his lips were
pressed against mine. I pushed him away without much effort—he let
me.

“I’m sorry,” he said as he backed away with
his fingers touching his lips. He sat back down on the bench, and I
walked to the car. My legs almost gave out a few times; I was
shaking so badly.

I got into the car and sat down, grateful to
be unseen. I tried to slow my heartbeat, and stop my hands from
shaking. I tried to stop the thoughts running through my mind. I
brought my forehead down to the steering wheel and just sat
there.

I felt awful, like it was my fault, as far as
I was concerned, it was. In all honesty, a very small part of me
seemed to come alive in that moment, and that part was begging to
go back.

I felt like I was going to lose it, like I
would self-combust—in all actuality it would have been the easiest
thing. I was in love with Dante, but now a part of me had been
awakened, and all that part wanted, was to look into those
sparkling green eyes again. I wasn’t even sure if I believed him, I
wasn’t sure if I really thought he was good,
but being good had
never gotten me anywhere
, that small piece of me argued.

Internal conflict flooded through me. It felt
like the sheer frustration pulsing through my veins, was setting my
heart on fire. I kept my forehead on the cool, leather steering
wheel, though it did little to calm me. I needed to drive away
right now, but I didn’t want to go home.

I imagined Dante’s dark-brown eyes, staring
at me in wonder. All the love I needed, showed in his smile. He was
perfect, and something was wrong with me. I couldn’t imagine ever
letting him down. I couldn’t imagine ever telling him this. I
couldn’t imagine lying to his perfect face. I wanted to die. I felt
tears streaming down my face, before I even knew they were
coming.

I heard the passenger door open, and Skylar
got in the car. He just sat there. I took my head off the steering
wheel and looked over at him. That small piece of me couldn’t
control me, but I felt it trying to dig deeper and deeper toward
the surface of my conscience.

“I shouldn’t have done that,” he whispered.
“You should go. It’s never been harder for me to ignore this.”

“Can I still reach you at the same number?” I
asked. My voice was dull, lifeless.

“Yeah, yeah,” he said as he reached for the
handle and got out of the car. He stopped for one long moment and
just stared at whatever he could see of me in the darkness.

It was amazing what could change in five
minutes. I was no longer sure of who I was or what I wanted. It was
like every emotion in my body was being fought by another. I
couldn’t make up my mind about what was wrong or right, or how I
felt in this moment.

I drove down the road. The streetlights
overhead lit the car for a short time as I drove under them. I came
up to my driveway and thought about turning around. Everything was
so messed up, and I couldn’t even think about facing Dante. I
couldn’t look into those deep-brown eyes; I couldn’t hurt him.

Then, I saw his front door open. He walked
out toward the car and got in the passenger seat as Skylar had done
less than twenty minutes ago.

He sat there staring into my eyes without a
word, but I couldn’t look back, not into his eyes. Instead, I
focused on his soft, perfect lips. He grabbed my chin and tilted my
head up so that I was looking right into his eyes, right through
his soul it seemed. There was pain there, it was evident. He could
see right through me. My face fell. He knew something was up, and
if he asked, I had no choice but to tell him.

He moved his fingers from my chin and rested
his palm on my cheek. I closed my eyes, but before the tears could
come, his lips were parting against mine. It was like that one
small piece awakened, now led the path for Dante to bring the rest
of me to life. He pulled me closer to him, over the console and
into the passenger seat with him. I knew whatever I felt for Skylar
in that one moment, in that one place inside of me, didn’t compare
to what I feel for Dante. I ached for him, and he was sitting right
here. I felt two tears escape down my cheek. He must have felt
their presence, because he pulled away and looked at me in the dull
light the moon cast.

Without a word, he wiped the tears away and
pulled me closer, letting my head fall on his shoulder. He held on
to me tight, as if I was slipping away, and he had to stop it. I
looked back up to his face grateful that he wasn’t asking, but I
knew I had to tell him.

“I was with Skylar,” I choked. He looked at
me with something I could only classify as understanding. He didn’t
speak he just sat there, giving me all of his attention. “He—he
kissed me.”

“Is there anything else? He didn’t tell you
anything, did he?”

“Wha—” was all I could manage to say. “You’re
not mad?”

“No, I can’t be, but he didn’t try to tell
you things… about me, right?”

“No, no. So… we’re okay?”

“Of course.” The understanding was still
there, but there was also a hint of something else—guilt.

“If you have something you want to get off
your mind….”

“There is one thing. Something I’ve wanted to
tell you for so long, something I need you to know. It’s the reason
I did everything I did in the future. It’s the reason for
everything I do now. And I’m hoping it’s all that matters,” he said
as he grabbed both of my hands. “I love you.”

“I love you, too, but I have a feeling
there’s something else you want to say.”

“I’m an awful person,” he said in a barely
audible whisper. I almost didn’t catch it, even though our faces
were only inches apart. “I was an awful person. It’s not really a
secret that I’ve kept, not in this world, but in another. It’s a
memory I feel bad for, and I couldn’t tell you, I just
couldn’t.”

“Tell me now,” I whispered. “I’m sure it’s
nothing; get it off of your chest.”

“I can feel everything I felt in my dreams of
the past, the pain, the sadness—the desperation. I need you to know
that I pretended to be Skylar to help you find Grace. To help you
regain your innocence, but I had another reason. It was written in
the stars since before you were born: Scarlett and Skylar. He
would’ve tried to help you find Grace; I believe that, he is not as
bad of a guy as he seems. You would have also fallen
head-over-heels in love.”

“So, you tricked me because you wanted to me
fall in love with you?”

“Yes,” he sighed.

“I told you a million times when you were
pretending to be Skylar how in love I was with you,” I said. “And
how did you know that I was meant to be with Skylar?”

“Come up to my room with me.”

When we got up to his room, I sat down on the
bed, and he kneeled on the floor reaching for something hidden
under his bed. He pulled out a book—the book he’d found at
Grace’s.

“You took this?” I asked.

“Yeah,” he mumbled as he turned the pages. “I
found this book in the past, too, although it had a much different
owner: Ann. I found it one day as I was leaving your house. I felt
bad for taking it, but I was happy that I did. Aha.”

He turned the book toward me. There were two
completely different pages open, each with a couple in love. The
first page, showed a beautiful brunette with a dark-haired guy with
haunting blue eyes. Then, it explained the reasons they had to be
together, and how it would change the world. The next picture was
of me and—at first glance, it could have been Dante, but then I
looked closer, green eyes, ashy dark-blonde hair. I didn’t read the
bottom; I couldn’t. I didn’t want to know how the world would—or
wouldn’t—change because of our ‘love.’ I pushed the book away.

“I don’t care. You didn’t
trick
me
into anything—aside from thinking you were Skylar, but I don’t
care. I don’t want to know what that stupid book says. Maybe it
would be better for the world if I was with Skylar, but it wouldn’t
be better for me.”

“Thank you for understanding,” he said.

“No, thank you,” I smiled. “Did you—did you
read what it says?”

“No,” he said. “I could never bring myself to
read that part.”

I lay back on the bed, looking up at his face
as he looked down at mine. He smiled and closed his eyes, while he
slowly inched his lips toward mine. It was like torture, waiting
and waiting, until finally, his lips were one with mine, and he was
lying beside me.

Before I could tell that any time had passed,
the sun was peeking in through the window. I looked over at Dante
and smiled. It was beautiful; I didn’t have to second guess my
feelings for him,
never
. Unfortunately, that piece inside of
me was growing stronger, it was starting to sink deep inside me,
and I had to think about the feelings that came with it.

I didn’t understand what could be so
important that two people would be pushed together for that one
purpose. I couldn’t look at the book; I couldn’t know why I needed
to be with Skylar, because then, when I wasn’t, I would know
exactly what the consequences were, and that I couldn’t handle.

I knew what I wanted, who I needed, and I
knew the only person who could make me feel complete. No one could
take Dante’s place; these were feelings developed over years of
friendship, and a one-year romance. The feelings for Skylar seemed
to appear seconds after our kiss, but that didn’t mean they would
be so easy to get rid of.

“Do you want to go to the movies?” Dante
asked.

“Sure,” I said, still wrapped up in thoughts
that would break his heart.

As we pulled up to the theater, I noticed
Skylar’s car was still parked across the street at the park. I got
out of the car without moving my eyes away. I looked a little
further, and I saw Skylar still sitting at the bench. I couldn’t
rip my eyes away from him; I couldn’t see him clearly, but I still
couldn’t stop staring.

“So what do you want to see?” Dante asked as
he walked over to me.

He waved his hand in front of my face when I
didn’t respond. His hand partially obstructed my view, but it
didn’t matter; I still couldn’t look away.

Dante came closer to me, and stood, looking
in the same direction that I was. He sighed, “I think I forgot
something in the car.” He went and sat down. I looked for a moment,
but it didn’t seem as if he was looking for anything.

When my eyes turned back to Skylar, he was
standing in front of his car about twenty feet closer, staring
back. He curled his lips up into a smile, but that didn’t hide the
fact that he looked miserable. He had circles under his eyes. He
walked closer in my direction.
Oh god, he was coming over to see
me.

As he got closer, it was pretty evident he
had been crying. His eyes were glassy, red, and swollen, and as he
got closer, I could see that his lips quivered through his
smile.

“Hey,” he said as he came over.

“Hi,” I said in the calmest voice I could
muster. It seemed as though that tiny part of me had a pulse of its
own, and it throbbed and ached. It hurt me to see him like this, a
guy I didn’t even like less than twenty-four hours ago.

“Hello,” Dante said as he got out of the car.
Skylar nodded in his direction. “Are you ready to go Scarlett?”
Dante asked.

I couldn’t take my eyes away from Skylar,
away from his even-brighter green, tortured eyes. I tried; I tried
with all of my might to answer Dante, to look in his direction. I
wanted nothing more than that, but I was no longer able to control
myself. It was like I was paralyzed.

“I’ll see you guys around,” Skylar said as he
turned around and walked away. When I finally looked over to Dante,
I saw almost the same exact look in his eyes, as I saw in
Skylar’s.

“I—I’m so sorry. I don’t know why—”

“Don’t worry about it. You can’t help it; I
know that.”

“What does this mean? For us, I mean.”

“Scarlett, I honestly don’t know.” His voice
took on a harsh edge that cut through me like a knife.

I didn’t ask for this; I didn’t want this. I
wanted everything to go back to the way it was yesterday before I
met with Skylar. How could one kiss change you this much?

“Dante, please. I’m sorry.”

“I’m not really in the mood to watch a movie
anymore. Do you mind if I just take you home?”

He pulled up to the house. He didn’t say a
word, he just waited for me to get out. I looked over at him,
waiting for him to say something, do something—anything.

“I need you to know that I’m not angry,” he
said, his eyes never leaving the windshield. “But that doesn’t
change the fact that I can’t do this.”

“But last night—”

“Last night I was fooling myself. Last night
I didn’t know the extent of this.”

“The extent of what?”

“The extent of your love, the extent of
this—this curse.”

“Please don’t do this, I love you.”

“I love you, too, but it doesn’t matter.”

“It does matter, don’t say that,” I
argued.