Detour from Normal

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Authors: Ken Dickson

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DETOUR

FROM

NORMAL

Ken Dickson

Copyright © 2013 Ken Dickson

All rights reserved.

ISBN: 1491248637

ISBN 13: 9781491248638

Library of Congress Control Number: 2013914431

CreateSpace Independent Publishing Platform, North Charleston, SC

DEDICATION

This book is dedicated to Beth. During my time of need, you were my constant angel. As I wrote my story, you were my biggest fan and toughest critic. In my life you are my best friend and the one person I never wish to be without.

Names of most people, all medical and mental health facilities and certain places of business have been changed to protect privacy.

CONTENTS

Dedication

Preface

Introduction

Part 1: Misery

Chapter 1: Desert Hope

Chapter 2: Under the Knife

Chapter 3: Twilight

Chapter 4: On the Mend

Chapter 5: Home Again

Chapter 6: Bad Sleep

Part 2: Chaos

Chapter 7: Pinecrest

Chapter 8: Inside the Big Machine

Chapter 9: Utopia: Dreaming

Chapter 10: My Changed World

Chapter 11: On the Run

Chapter 12: Down the Rabbit Hole

Chapter 13: Utopia: Foundation

Chapter 14: A New Carlos

Chapter 15: Nine Hours and a Urine Test

Chapter 16: Utopia: Experimenting

Chapter 17: The Little Red Car

Chapter 18: A Flawless Night

Chapter 19: Phoenix Mercy

Chapter 20: A Danger to Myself and Others

Chapter 21: The PDC

Chapter 22: Utopia: My Problem Solver

Chapter 23: The Crash

Part 3: Resolution

Chapter 24: Making Lemonade from Lemons

Hand-me-downs

The Best Pillow

Girlie Pics

The Bad Cuff

Too Many Footballs

A Single Ray of Sunshine

Smuggling Food

Stolen Glasses

Room 1149

Angels Among Us

Getting Out AMA

The Scandal

The Cat Lady and the Evil Asian

Jimmy

Chapter 25: Utopia: Putting Pencil to Paper

Chapter 26: The Last Visitor

Chapter 27: The Burden

Chapter 28: Coming Off Adrenaline

Chapter 29: Taking the Stand

The Grievance

The Preparation

The Hearing

Chapter 30: Utopia: Letting Go

Chapter 31: Cream

Chapter 32: Loose Ends

Chapter 33: The Little Red Car

Chapter 34: Normal Sinus Rhythm

Part 4: Insight

Chapter 35: Side Effects

From Simple to Unsolvable

My Mania

Sleep Paralysis

Hypnagogic Dreams

Micro-Emotions

Selective Hearing

Collapse of the Ego

Making Sense of Crazy

The Smoking Gun

The Most Seductive Drug

Chapter 36: Hope

Life without Lithium

Living with a Stranger

Rising from the Ashes

We Are People

Utopia.com

Chapter 37: Nothing Stops Life

Afterword

Acknowledgments

Bibliography

PREFACE

Mania is a psychological state that can be brought about by medical procedures, adverse reactions to medications (notably steroids and SSRIs), drug abuse (such as cocaine and methamphetamines), trauma (physical or psychological), or persistent mental illness such as bipolar disorder. Once experienced, it is something that will never be forgotten.

Detour from Normal
is a true account of medically induced mania resulting from a lifesaving surgery, associated medications, and improper treatment. Because of the liberal use of medications, and their singular and combined side effects, mania is becoming increasingly more prevalent among postsurgical patients, commencing as long as several weeks after their release from the hospital.

Mania manifests itself in some of the following ways:

1. Physical changes—increased energy, insomnia, catatonia, heightened senses, improved memory;

2. Behavioral changes—hyperactivity, increased socialization, keen interest in new ideas or projects, rapid or excessive speech, overspending, increased sex drive or risky sexual behavior, poor judgment;

3. Mood changes—optimism, happiness, euphoria, irritability;

4. Thought
changes—avalanche of ideas, uncharacteristic self-confidence, difficulty remaining focused, grandiose thoughts, delusions, hallucinations, loss of sense of time.

It is critical that these changes are detected early and treatment sought, or the patient will become incapable of recognizing his or her disorder and may refuse treatment.

Because of the little information available on medically induced mania, its treatment, and its prevention, the author's family, friends, and relatives had no experts to turn to for help. In the hands of uninformed professionals to whom they entrusted his care, his condition rapidly deteriorated.
Detour from Normal
will not only awaken readers to the potential pitfalls of our medical and mental health systems, but it will also provide important information that may change the lives of loved ones potentially heading toward similar fates.

Beyond that,
Detour from Normal
is an incredibly human story told from the author's heart, which is bound to impact anyone who reads it.

INTRODUCTION

Before April 14, 2011, I was just an average citizen, with a job, a house, a wife, kids, and a few pets. I was fifty-five years old and extraordinarily healthy. I'd never had any major surgery or mental health issues. If I ever did see a doctor, I left my medical forms almost completely blank: I had no medical history. I exercised regularly and had even recently completed a grueling hike up the Flatiron, one of most difficult hikes in Arizona.

After April 14, everything changed. What began as an emergency surgery to remove a damaged portion of my lower intestine quickly became something much more complicated. Over the next few weeks, I was rushed to emergency rooms, hospitals, and psychiatric facilities; I was administered over thirty different drugs, some against my will; and I suffered paralyzing seizures. I had six CAT scans—the radiation equivalent of three hundred standard X-rays. I had an MRI of my head, EEGs of my brain, and EKGs of my heart. I was hauled away by police and confined in a high-security facility where I was observed continuously, and I stood up to fight for my rights and my safety in court.

This is the true story of my ordeal, an insane snapshot of a life I could never have imagined would be my own. It was a time when no one who loved me or cared for me knew who I was or what to do with me. It was a time when everyone harbored identical concerns: what was wrong with me and would I ever be the same again?

Part 1

MISERY

Chapter 1

DESERT HOPE

On Sunday, April 10, 2011, I'd been swinging a rusty pick for what seemed like hours, and it was now late afternoon. Despite the fact that it was only seventy degrees, I was sweating profusely, and my gray T-shirt was mottled with perspiration. I removed my baseball cap, wiped the sweat from my brow, and replaced it; then I took a long drink of water from the red-and-white Coleman water jug sitting close by. Years earlier I'd promised my wife, Beth, a lemon tree, and it was well beyond time to deliver on that promise. The day before, we had finally gone shopping for that tree. Somehow, after all that time, one tree just wasn't appropriate and we ended up instead with two fruit trees, which were scheduled to be delivered later in the week. I could have arranged for holes to be dug and the trees professionally planted, but with the poor economy, four job losses, and months of unemployment in the previous five years, I wasn't eager to spend more money than I had to. After resting for a few minutes, I once again hefted the heavy pick by its sun-bleached wooden handle, raised it high over my head, and drove it with an audible
chink
into the hard caliche.

Throughout my life I'd often had times when I felt I needed to prove my manhood—if only to myself. This was one of those times. I put
every ounce of effort into each swing of the pick; despite the negligible response of the earth to my best efforts, I was determined that when I was finished, there would be two twenty-four-inch square holes where I stood, each two feet deep—just large enough for each of the two trees to be planted.

Unbeknownst to me, a disease had been at work on my lower intestines, perhaps for years. My bowels had weakened in several places and tissue had begun to bulge between muscle fibers. With each stroke of the pick, one of those bulges was stretching beyond natural limits. By the time I'd proven to myself that I could still do the work of a much younger man, the damage had been done. Though it would take days before I realized the full impact of what had transpired, my fate was sealed: the ride of my life had begun.

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