Devil’s in the Details (56 page)

"Yup, that Martines. He was handing off Voltaire eyes only information to the Colombians, and they would pay him twice as much to eliminate Voltaire operatives. Luckily he was stopped after one hit. The old lady lost her shit when she found out his devious ways and did the hit herself." Dani let out a slow breath, "That is a mess I wish I could erase from my memory."

I closed my eyes, rubbing at the side of my head remembering the fallout from that whole disaster. I was sent to England for a few months to work with the old man in his home office, keeping me out of that dust storm. The old lady had wanted me to be her personal housecleaner when she went on a tirade and started vetting all of the plumbers she was suspicious of after Martines. The old man pulled me away, fearing if I started killing my own, I would never be the same. "Dani, why are you calling me and bringing up the past?"

"Normally I wouldn't. Some random cop trying to earn his stripes or bars is nothing to me. It doesn't even matter that he and nurse blue eyes dated for a couple of years and were on the verge of marriage, babies, and puppies in a house on Staten Island. It matters to me when this random cop just called the woman you want babies and puppies with a couple of hours ago. They talked for about five minutes and when that call ended, his computer started lighting up with Martines name, Voltaire's Pentagon address and a few interesting facts that have Sergeant James Hewlett on the short list to having a strange accident one late night in the big apple."

Dani's rapid fire speech told me she was doing her best to keep Alex out of the line of fire. "I told you to stop talking about…."

"I haven't said a goddamn thing, Dani. So fucking stop before you even get started." I spun away from my desk to lock eyes on all of the medals in the box behind the desk. "We don't even know what they talked about. We don't know if he suddenly missed her and called her out of the blue, and it could be that since he is a newly promoted sergeant, he’s trying to prove his worth by digging in cold cases."

I clenched my jaw to reign in my building rage, "Martines was a fuck up, a giant fuck up and left a giant fucking mess for everyone to clean up. I wouldn't be surprised if the old lady fucked up and left a mess when she killed him. Regardless, I don't need to hear about Alex's past lover or almost whatever. I can't, because I don't want to slip back into who I was then when I am trying so hard to be…" I swallowed hard, choking on a half sob as the emotions all swung home, hard. "Human."

There was an awkward silence on the phone before Dani broke it, "I know Victoria, but I made a fucking promise to you, years ago, and I don't break any of my fucking promises. I’m only telling you so that you know what I am doing. I am going to write in my formal report to the Manhattan office to monitor this Hewlett from a distance, and let him root around in his cold case. I will also write up that all of his phone calls, internet activity, and whatever, is nothing to be concerned with. Just phone calls to family, friends, co-workers and the like. I may have already deleted his phone call to Alex." She let out a slow breath, "But you might want to talk to her. Like I said, she’s smarter than we think."

I clenched my jaw harder, "If I talk to her, it might lead to a conversation that I have no idea how to have. It may lead to me having to tell her things that I can't hide anymore, or want to hide."

I picked up the box of medals, squeezing the frame so hard, I heard the wood creak, "Dani, how the hell do I tell her I’m a killer? I can barely tell her that I love her when she's awake." I sucked in an angry breath, "How the fuck do I tell her anything that isn't a lie and have her stay or stay alive? How can I have anything?" I didn't realize I was yelling into the phone until Dani snapped back.

"Shut it down, Victoria! Stop yelling at me before I drive up there and break your nose again!" She blew out a breath, "I understand everything you're going through, trust me, this is why I live in a big empty house with computers and secrets. I lost the ability to tell anyone anything but the truth a long time ago, so don't lay the pity party on me. I fully understand, Victoria, and I’m trying to help you and help myself as we both struggle to find the human in the human suits we put on every day."

Slamming the medal box back down on the bookshelf behind the desk, I rubbed my face, wiping away the angry tears, "I'm tired, Dani." I paused, hearing Alex's mini cooper pull into the driveway. "I have to go, Alex is home."

"Talk to her Victoria, tell her that you love her. That you want her forever and then worry about the now with her while I worry about the rest. I will get you out of this, somehow, but in the meantime, talk to her. Leave all the masks in the garage in that shitty duffle bag and put your Victoria face on, the one that I love dearly even though it's the biggest pain in my ass, and live. Live the life you want and in the end you will have it." Dani suddenly sniffled, "I’ll talk to you later, fuck this world."

She hung up before I could say another word, I tucked the phone away in my desk and wiped my face. Trying to rub it so it looked like I just woke up and wasn't crying as I heard Alex's key jingle in the front door.

I wasn't jealous of Alex and her past, I didn't have it in me to feel jealousy when I could look in her eyes and just read her emotions and love for me like they were a bright neon sign.

I was angry. Angry at Voltaire for always being a part of my life and not being able to do anything about it.

I took a steadying breath as Alex entered the kitchen, setting a few paper bags on the counter with grease spots, before spinning around with a white plastic dress bag in her hands. She caught me leaning against the doorframe of the den, grinning as she blushed, "You're supposed to be resting."

I shrugged, "I never listen to orders." I smiled softly, taking her in as it made my heart ache to know that Alex was too special to keep in the dark and I needed to listen to Dani. Put on my real face and let this incredible woman in as far as I could before I introduced her to the hooded figure, if I ever did. I nodded at the bag hanging from her hand, "Can I see the dress?"

Alex shook her head, "Nope." She walked to the laundry room to hang it up, "You can see it on Saturday, I want to surprise you." She moved to the counter, removing white paper containers full of delicious smells. "How are you feeling?"

"Better." I looked down at the floor, "Alex, when is the lease up at your apartment?"

She sighed, reaching for plates, "Not for another six months, I just signed on for a six-month extension when we kind of stopped talking. I was going to ride it out here for a while, then thought about moving back to New York or to San Diego." Alex looked at me, "My security deposit was so ridiculous that I’m stuck with it until Christmas." She squinted at me, "Why do you ask?"

I smiled, shaking my head. I already planned a visit to her landlord in a few days to make sure she got out of her lease and all of her money back before I asked her to move in with me Saturday night. "No reason."

I pushed away from the doorframe, walking over to the woman who was changing my life every minute she was in it. "Did I ever tell you about my sixth birthday party? Where Grandma Edith took me to a Judy Garland drag show?"

Alex giggled, looking sideways at me, "Why Ms. Bancroft are you about to tell me a story about your childhood?" She covered her heart in mock surprise, winking at me, "Please do go on."

I sat gingerly on the counter, watching Alex fill plates up with fragrant Thai food. I told her about what it was like for a six-year-old to eat birthday cake sitting on a bar stool and being sung happy birthday by a Tina Turner impersonator while my grandma slipped me some of her Manhattan. I watched Alex's face light up with joy as I shared more and more about myself. Taking the first step in listening to Dani’s advice.

Start living the life I wanted and not the one the Colonel and Voltaire gave me.

Chapter 18

         ~Saturday~

The white dinner jacket hung on the back of my desk chair, the evening sunlight pushing and finding its way to the gold and silver edges of my Navy flair, casting back stray lines of light across the old desk. I stood next to the chair, looking out the window, nursing a glass of Jack Daniels while Alex finished getting ready. We had parted ways a couple of hours ago to get ready for the formal simultaneously. Knowing that eager hands and libidos would delay getting dressed, making us very fashionably late.

Alex and I had fallen back into our blissful bubble over the last couple of days. Sleeping in late, watching movies and her silly dragon show, having a few barbecue lunches with Dale and Mary, and fooling around as much as my body would let me. I smirked at the memory of the night after Thai food. I couldn't resist not touching Alex and trying to initiate something on the couch while we watched one of her saved episodes.

I may have pissed Alex off when I distracted her during an important plot twist, but the payback was definitely worth it. Worth the pain of arching my back off the couch as the angry but determined woman kept a death grip on my thighs. Showing me that I would soon have a hell of a time remaining the teacher to Alex's student.

The smirk remained as I turned to set the watered down drink on the desk. Glancing at the white jacket, I sighed looking at all of the medals, ribbons, gold and everything that told my story in one look. This formal would be full of my fellow faculty members, and not all knew my military history since I often left certain ribbons off and tucked away in a desk drawer.

I titled my head up to look at the stairs, hearing the bedroom bathroom drawers open and close. Alex should be ready soon. She was taking longer than I had, since she had far more to do than I. I just had to adhere to existing military standards for hair, makeup and jewelry.

The fit of my very tailored uniform was the only deviation. Tailored to fit all of my curves perfectly. If I couldn't wear a dress of my choice, I wanted to look impeccable at this event. Deep down I tailored the uniform for Alex, knowing she had a thing for me in uniform.

Hearing the creak of the stairs, I turned to look in the kitchen, reaching for the white jacket, "Alex, I hope you’re ready, I would like to leave soon. Dani is expecting to meet us in front of the hall. She said something about not wanting to go in alone." I shook my head, Dani was a tough, dangerous Naval officer, but balked like a small child at any and all social gatherings, never wanting to be alone for too long.

"Yes, I'm ready." Alex's voice echoed what I was sure, was a smile on her face, drawing my eyes from the collar of the jacket to her.

Alex stood in front of me, grinning as predicted, watching my eyes widen at the pure beauty on display in front of me.

The dress she wore was a lavender grey color, floor length with a sweetheart neckline that accentuated the woman's elegance. The dress fell to gather up in the middle, a crystal brooch in the center resting on the top of a slit in the dress that made my mouth water when it offered a glimpse of her thigh. The garment was elegant, beautiful, and sexy as hell in the way it wrapped around her. Her hair was down, falling over her shoulder in soft layers, and her makeup was minimal but highlighted her natural beauty. Alex rarely ever needed much makeup, in my opinion. She often looked stunning with plain old lip gloss on.

I stood dumbfounded at the sight of the gorgeous woman before me. I knew Alex was beautiful, but this dress took her above and beyond that. Alex looked like a princess waiting for her prince charming, with a big grin and cocked eyebrow.

"Victoria? Are you okay? You seem stuck." Alex's grin morphed into her infamous smirk, the same one she always tossed my way the moment before I had my clothing attacked in a brunette's fury to remove them as quickly as possible.