Dewitched (Witchless In Seattle Mysteries Book 3) (27 page)

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Authors: Dakota Cassidy

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BOOK: Dewitched (Witchless In Seattle Mysteries Book 3)

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Permanently? What the what? Okay sure, they were selfish witches, and there’d been a mishap or two along the way, especially the one involving Baba Who-Hahs nephew Ben.

But she’d cleaned it up. All of it—every last drop. No one had been hurt.

“I’m not sure I understand,” Winnie said, staring up into Baba Yaga’s flashing eyes.

“Oh, I can help with that,” Baba Yaga offered kindly. “You, Zelda—how many pairs of Jimmy Choo shoes do you own?”

Winnie watched Zelda mentally count in her head. “Um…three?”

Winnie winced. Total lie. Bald-faced.

Baba-Yaga frowned, her eyes flashing with anger. “Seventy-five and you paid for none of them! Not to mention your wardrobe and cars and the embarrassingly expensive vacations you’ve taken for free.” Her eyes narrowed dangerously.

Now probably wouldn’t be the time to tell her Zelda actually had eighty pairs…

“And you, Winnifred. You’ve used your magic to destroy a man’s livelihood, my nephew’s livelihood, never mind my collection of leg warmers, and have incurred millions in damages from your temper tantrums. You’ve obliterated six buildings to date. Can you not see how I had to fight for you both?” she demanded, her beautiful eyes fiery.

“Well, when you put it that way…” Winnie mumbled.

“There is no other way to put it,” she snapped as her mystical lynch mob nodded like the bobble-headed dorks they were. “Zelda, you’ve used your magic for self-serving purposes, and Winnifred, you have a temper that, when combined with your magic, could be deadly. We are White Witches, ladies. We use magic to heal and to make Mother Earth a better place. Not to walk the runway and take down cities.”

“So what do we have to do?” Winnie asked, a tremble in her tone.

Baba Yaga winked. “There are two envelopes with your tasks in them. You will not share the contents with each other. If you do, you will render yourselves powerless. Forever. You have till midnight on All Hallows Eve to complete your assignments and then you will come under review again with the Council.”

“And if we’re unable to fulfill our task?” Winnie asked, wanting to get all the facts up front.

“You will become mortal.”

Holy. Shit.

On that alarming and potentially life-ending note, Baba Yaga and her freaky-deaky entourage disappeared in a cloud of old-lady-crouch smoke.

“Well, that’s fucking craptastic,” Zelda said as she warily sniffed her envelope—one that appeared out of thin air and landed right between her fingertips.

Winnie nodded. “You took the words out of my mouth.” She stared down at the thin envelope then set it on the cot, almost afraid to touch it.

“Can you even believe this shit, Winnie?”

No. She couldn’t believe it. “So that’s it? We just do whatever the contents of the envelopes tell us to do, but we can’t do it together? Jesus, Z. Okay, so we’re a little self-absorbed, but I don’t just use my magic for selfish reasons. I’ve used it to heal. Remember when you got that paper cut at Office Max? I totally healed it because it was bleeding all over your cute sundress.”

“I get the feeling that’s not the kind of healing magic Baba Yasshole means,” Zelda answered.

“You know what? Screw Baba Ghanoush!” Winnie yelped, grabbing the envelope and waving it in the air.

Zelda sighed, putting her hand on Winnie’s arm to prevent her from doing any damage to their ridiculous task. “Yomamma. It’s Baba Yomamma, Winnie, and seriously. What choice do we have at this point but to do what she says? You don’t want to stay in here, do you? We only have so many Kotex pads between us. So let’s yank up our big girl drawers and get this over with. Deal?”

Winnie made a face, but she nodded. “Baba Wah-Wha said we couldn’t share the contents of our envelopes. But I know us, and we won’t be able to keep our traps shut if we open these envelopes together…”

Zelda sucked in her cheeks. “Yeah. She must want this to hurt, because we always share everything.”

“Well, we can’t share this or we’ll be sharing immortality.”

Zelda shuddered beneath her orange jumpsuit, fingering her envelope. “Fuck that. Okay, so now what?” she asked.

Winnie squared her shoulders. “We suck it up, Z. If we can survive teaching Big Sue how to apply makeup and scaling those calluses on her feet with a fork we snuck out of the kitchen, we can survive anything.”

Zelda grinned, as beautiful as always. “So we walk outta here on three?”

Winnie hesitated, but only a moment. She hated leaving Zelda. Hated that they weren’t going to go the distance to the end of this nightmare together.

But losing their immortality? She knew Z almost as well as she knew herself, and she knew losing their magic would be like losing a vital organ.

Maybe two.

Magic was who they were and jail really was as bad as Orange is the New Black made it seem.

So Winnie smiled back at her and held up a fist for her to bump. “Yep.”

Zelda bumped it and they both took a deep breath before she counted out, “Then one, two, three…”

The doors of their cell popped open the moment they approached them, clanging and creaking.

Winnie gave Zelda one last smile before she made a left, heading down the winding concrete path leading out of their cellblock, dimly lit with only torches.

And Zelda hung a right until she was nothing more than a curvy dot.

Buy Witched At Birth on Amazon

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Note from Dakota Cassidy

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Dewitched
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About Dakota Cassidy

Dakota Cassidy is a
USA Today
bestselling author with over thirty books. She writes laugh-out-loud romantic comedy, grab-some-ice erotic romance, hot and sexy alpha males, paranormal shifters, contemporary kick-ass women, and more.

Dakota was invited by Bravo TV to be the Bravoholic for a week, wherein she snarked the hell out of all the Bravo shows. She received a starred review from Publishers Weekly for
Talk Dirty to Me
, won a Romantic Times Reviewers’ Choice Award for
Kiss and Hell
, along with many review site recommended reads and reviewer top pick awards.

Dakota lives in the gorgeous state of Oregon with her real life hero and her dogs, and she loves hearing from readers!

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eBooks by Dakota Cassidy

Witchless In Seattle Mysteries, a Paranormal Cozy Mystery series

1. Witch Slapped

2. Quit Your Witchin'

Wolf Mates, a Paranormal Romantic Comedy series

1. An American Werewolf In Hoboken

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00WROKCEQ