Dirt: A Sexy Small Town Romance (Copperwood Book 1) (12 page)

I stared at her, my lips tightening down into a thin line. Hearing Mya’s name from Alene’s mouth kicked me right in the gut. She was always making snide little comments about Mya in high school, and I never stopped her then, even though I should have, but I sure as hell wasn’t going to let her do it now.

“Do you?”

She stared up at me with a defiant glare, refusing to respond.

“I’ll walk away from this. Leave you with nothing. No money and no help.” I leaned down closer to her, getting my face right next to hers. The aggression rolled off me in waves and I knew she wouldn’t be able to interpret the invasion of her personal space as an intimate gesture. “Say. You. Understand.”

Alene pulled back and nodded her head. “Fine.”

I jerked the car into gear and pressed down hard on the gas. What did I care about the car? It was a rental.

Neither one of us spoke as I pulled into the empty parking area of the state park. We chose the location because it was out in the open and we weren’t likely to have any unexpected visitors. To anyone driving by, we’d look like we stopped for directions.

I just hoped no one would recognize the rental car.

I got out of the car as soon as I turned off the ignition. I wanted to be as far away from Alene as I could get. I felt dirtier than I did when I found out about my father. I just wanted to get the next hour over and done with and back to Mya.

I needed her warm brown eyes on me and her light touches. I brought my fist down hard on the roof of the car, unable to keep the frustrations down. Alene boxed me into a corner. Not because of her threats. Now that Mya knew, they didn’t matter. No, she boxed me into a corner because she needed my help and I wasn’t going to turn my back on her. My father might not have screwed her over like he did the rest of the town, but her current problem was likely a side effect of his deeds.

I just didn’t foresee her seeing it as an invitation to pick up where we ended it when I left town at eighteen. I brought my fist down on the car again. She had to have seen Mya before this if Alene brought her up in the car.

I had no idea what Alene said to Mya, but it couldn’t have been good. I needed to finish this up and get to her. I needed to explain.

23

Mya

M
y phone rang and I glanced at the screen, half–hoping and expecting it to be Shane. It was Mike. I didn’t want to talk to him and ignored his call.

Driving around town wasn’t helping, so I turned down Main street and drove out of town. I didn’t expect it would make me feel any better, but it sure as hell wouldn’t make me feel worse.

When the small buildings in town faded in my rear–view mirror, I rolled down the window and took a deep breath.

Shane was moving back to town. How was I ever going to face him again, knowing what we did at that house when he had done and was likely doing the same to Alene. I thought I wanted him back in Copperwood, but I was wrong. It would have been better if he was leaving today.

If I never had ot see him again, I could pretend that none of this happened with Alene. I could live in a happy little delusional world where Shane and I had a moment together and then went on with our lives. Sure I would hurt, but I wouldn’t hurt nearly as much as I was hurting now.

My phone vibrated against my seat and I looked at it. Mike again.

I looked away from the phone and turned up the volume. I really didn’t want to talk to him. At least not right now.

I yanked the steering wheel to the right and pulled over on the side of the road.
What was I thinking?

It wasn’t like I could keep driving until I ran out of gas. Well, I could, but I would still be in the same place I was before everything happened today. Just in a different town.

I pounded my fists against the steering wheel and screamed. It didn’t actually solve anything, but at least I felt better for it. A good scream always helped when things got really shitty and if now wasn’t shitty, I would need to have to reassess how I defined the word shitty.

My phone vibrated again and without looking at the screen, I switched it over to silent mode. Screaming hadn’t improved on my desire to talk to anyone. I closed my eyes and leaned back against the seat.

Just once, I wished the town didn’t live up to my expectations of disappointment and then I could be disappointed about not being disappointed.

I screamed again. At least in my car, away from everyone else, there wasn’t a chance of being caught. I could wallow in my misery in solitude.

I breathed in deeply, filling my lungs with the much needed oxygen I released with my screaming fest. I still didn’t feel any better. And if I thought about it, I wouldn’t feel any better, not for several weeks — if I was lucky.

I almost drove back home. Almost. At the last minute, I pulled back on the road and continued on in the same direction. I knew I wasn’t going to actually get anywhere, but at least I didn’t have to go home right away. I could put off the inevitable for just a little bit longer.

By the time I turned around and headed back into town, I had calmed down enough where I didn’t feel like I was going to break down in tears at the first sympathetic look. I also stopped staring at the road in front of me and bothered to look out the passenger window every so often. The entrance to a state park was coming up and I thought maybe I could stop there before going home.

I slowed down and prepared to turn off when I saw Shane’s car in the parking lot. He was standing outside his car and so was Alene.

I punched the gas. Unbelievable. Alene and Shane managed to ruin the few good things I had in this town in one afternoon.

I didn’t need to see anything more. Shit, I didn’t want to see anything more. I had seen enough.

When I pulled into my driveway I came to another disappointing conclusion. I wouldn’t be able to avoid the inevitable. Both Kirstin
and
Mike’s cars were parked in the street in front of the house.

I couldn’t put it off any longer.

I slid out of my car and slinked towards the house. There was no other way to describe my approach to the house. I thought I wanted to be alone, and maybe I did, but it wasn’t what I needed. And my friends — all two of them — and family — the only one left — knew it.

Kirstin stepped out of the front door before I got up the front steps and held up her hands. “Before you say anything, I was worried, and when Mike called wondering where you were because you weren’t picking up your phone…”

She didn’t need to continue her confession.

“Mike called you?”

“He was worried.”

“He worries about things that aren’t his business to worry about.” I spat my frustration out at her, even though Kirstin didn’t deserve it.

“He’s your friend.”

I nodded my head reluctantly. “I know.”

“They aren’t going to ask any questions. I told them not to. You’d tell them when you wanted to.”

“Thanks.”

“But that doesn’t mean I won’t.” Kirstin leaned back against the wall and crossed her arms over her chest. “Where’d you go?”

“Just drove around.” There wasn’t any reason for me to lie to her.

“And you couldn’t pick up the phone?” She arched an eyebrow high above her eye and I had a sudden realization why men in the bar didn’t push. For being a tiny little thing, she was intimidating as hell.

“I didn’t want to talk to anyone.” I dropped my purse and sat down on the bottom step. My shoulders curled forward and I wrapped my arms tight around my stomach.

Kirstin sat down next to me and rested her arm around my shoulder. She pulled me against her and it was an awkward fit, but we managed. We must have looked silly, the pixie comforting the beanstalk — the old nickname from high school never left me. It felt good though. Feeling the warmth of another body next to mine and I leaned into the comfort.

“He was at the park with her.” I stared down at my hands, I didn’t trust myself not to cry if I looked at her.

“Well, we already knew he was an asshole.”

“But he isn’t, because he didn’t promise me anything.”

Kirstin snorted at my statement. The derision was so obvious, I didn’t have to ask her what she meant by it. Thankfully, she didn’t feel a need to explain it.

She squeezed my shoulder and stood up. “Come in when you’re ready, ok?”

I waited until I heard the door close behind me before knuckling my eyes, trying to push the tears back to the safe wall of not caring. I didn’t think knuckles worked well as a tear deterrent, but it was better than doing nothing. I stood up with a sigh and bit down on the inside of my cheek. It seemed like I was doing that a lot lately. Anything that was better than nothing, which really wasn’t anything worthwhile.

The worst thing was that even after everything that happened, I wouldn’t have given up my time with Shane.

Pathetic was my new name.

24

Shane

I
knew something was wrong the moment I pulled up in front of Mya’s.

No, that wasn’t true. I knew something was wrong when every single call went straight to voicemail — not even ringing through.

I knew Alene said something to her, but I never thought she’d believe it. Christ, I never thought she’d even listen to anything Alene said.

By the time I got out of my car, I already had a welcoming party waiting for me. Except, I didn’t think welcoming me was their intent.

Mike and the girl from the bar walked across the lawn and stopped me from getting any closer to the house.

“This is unexpected.” I looked between both of them and from the expressions on their faces, I knew it wasn’t going to be a nice surprise. Mike glared at me as he stalked across the law. Too bad, I was looking so closely at his face and not at his fist. It hit my jaw with a force I definitely wasn’t expecting.

“You fucking asshole.”

I barely stayed on my feet. I rubbed my hand against my jaw before spitting out some blood from the split on the inside of my cheek. I grinned back at Mike, falling back into a fighter stance. I might not have thrown many punches in the past ten years, but I still worked out. I figured I could handle him.

The girl stepped between us and I dropped my arms. She looked over her shoulder at Mike and it was hard not to grin at the flinch he made in response to her visible disappointment. “Like that helps anything.” She spun her attention back on me and I took a step back.

“I’m having dinner with Mya.”

“Yeah… no you aren’t.” She planted her hands on her hips and ran her stare over me.

“If Mya doesn’t want to have dinner with me, she needs to be the one to tell me.”

“I don’t think Mya’s going to be telling you anything for a while.”

“How could you?” Mike shouted over the girl’s shoulder, but her tiny body kept him at bay.

The muscles in my jaw clenched and the ache reminded me of the punch. I trusted Mya not to talk about what my dad did. I expected I would have to tell Mike at some point, but I wanted it on my time table, not hers. Hell, it took enough courage to tell her, I didn’t think I would have been able to stomach the disappointment from Mike so soon after. But Mya took that away from me.

“Look, it’s probably better if you just go. Okay?” The girl looked back at the house and I followed her gaze.

The curtain twitched and I knew Mya stood behind it, watching what was happening. I couldn’t understand why she wasn’t out here. Why she wasn’t smoothing things over with Mike? After this morning, I thought she understood. I thought she was on my side.

I shouldn’t have bothered. Hell, I shouldn’t even have come back to Copperwood and I definitely shouldn’t have spent any time with Mya. I didn’t need to spend another ten years thinking about what life could have been if we were together.

I looked back at Mike and lifted my chin at him. If the bartender from Pick’s wasn’t standing between us, I would have returned the punch and wanted Mike to be certain that I wasn’t walking away from him because I was scared of his fists.

“Fine.” I threw my hands up and walked back around my car. “Tell Mya, I’ll be at the motel until tomorrow in case she wants to apologize.”

Before I even got in the car, the little blonde pixie catapulted her body over the hood of the car and pounded her fists against my chest. “Apologize to you? You should be begging her to forgive you. You should be groveling at her door now.”

This time Mike intervened and wrapped his arms around her waist, pulling the girl and her flailing limbs off me. I rubbed my hand over my chest. For such a tiny thing she was pretty strong.

I slammed the palm of my hand against the roof of the car. “What the hell?”

“You ass. You couldn’t keep your dick in your pants, could you?” Her volume increased with each word until she was shouting. It was unlikely that all the neighbors hadn’t heard every single word.

The front door slammed shut and we all stopped for a moment. I hoped it was Mya, coming out to fix things, but luck wasn’t on my side.

“Mike, Kirstin. Go on inside.” Richard Sidony loomed at the front door. He watched them walk back inside before he turned to face me. “I said some things to you earlier, son. If what Mya thinks happened is true, you made a liar of me.”

I walked back around the car, but didn’t go near the lawn. If Mya’s dad wanted to talk to me, he’d have to come across the lawn. I didn’t know what he was getting at, but since the moment I pulled up at their house, I hadn’t had the upper hand and I didn’t like that feeling very much. “I didn’t make a liar of you, sir.” I tucked my hands into my pockets and crossed a leg over the other while I leaned back against the car.

“According to Mya you did.” Rich took the few steps down to the lawn and another few until he stood several feet away from me.

His words hurt. Well not the words. It was the way he stood there, like he didn’t trust me. And really he shouldn’t have. Not after what my dad did. But when we talked, what he said to me meant a lot and it now it felt like he was talking all those words back.