Don't Even Think About It (16 page)

Tess was collecting tickets at the fortune-telling booth with BJ when Teddy popped up in line.

His homeroom was hosting a bake sale and he smelled like chocolate.
There she is. She can’t get away now.

Tess pretended to be very busy counting change.

“Have you been avoiding me?” he demanded.

“What? Me? No.”

BJ coughed.
Bullshit.

Tess glared at him.
None of your business.

You can’t be mad at him for liking someone else,
BJ thought. He made change for a freshman and then looked pointedly at Tess.

Um, Tess was pretty sure she could. She couldn’t stand listening to his lovesick thoughts. Sadie was so gorgeous. Sadie was so hot. Look at Sadie’s awesome perky breasts. Yes, that was what he’d been thinking about during chemistry the day before. Tess had almost puked into her beaker.

You have better tits than Sadie,
BJ thought.

She flushed.

Teddy leaned toward her over the table. “I’ve left you a million messages.”

“I know, I’m sorry. I’ve been really busy.” She shot a look at BJ.
Please don’t use the word
tits.

I didn’t say it. I thought it. Anyway, it’s true. What would you rather me call them?

How about
breasts
?

Point taken. You have better breasts than Sadie.

Tess looked down at her chest.
I do?

Yup. I’ve felt hers—and yours—so I know.

Oh, shut up.

Don’t tell me you’ve forgotten about our time together in the closet? Do you still have that sexy white bra?

Tess’s cheeks heated up.
Eighth grade. Seven minutes in heaven. Unsexy white bra. I haven’t forgotten. So when did you feel up Sadie?

He smiled smugly.
Eighth grade. And it was sexy. On you, any bra would be sexy.

You had a very busy eighth grade
, she fired back.

Teddy placed a chocolate cupcake in front of Tess. “For you.”

“Aw, thanks,” she said.
Too bad cupcakes aren’t on my diet.

Oh, please,
BJ thought.
You do not need to be on a diet. Don’t listen to Mackenzie.

Maybe if I was as skinny as Sadie, Teddy would like me.

If you were as skinny as Sadie, you would have no boobs. And I like your booty too.

“I’ll get out of your way,” Teddy said, “but do you want to get coffee after the carnival?”

“Oh, um, I don’t think I can today. I have plans.”

His face fell. “Oh, that’s too bad. Tomorrow?”

“Maybe. I’ll call you if I can, okay?” she said.

He nodded. “Okay. Have fun. See you soon.” He waved and walked away.

“What plans?” BJ asked.

“I’m going to try a SoulCycle class,” she said.

“Is that the spin class?”

“Yup.”

“Ouch,” he said. “Sounds painful.”

She nodded.
Maybe if I lose five pounds, Teddy will like me.
She eyed the cupcake. The moist-looking cupcake. It was calling to her.
Eat me. Eat me! I am delicious!

BJ laughed. “Just eat it. A guy doesn’t fall for a girl because of five pounds.”

Tess shrugged. “Ten pounds, then. Can you eat it? It’s taunting me.”

“Let’s share it,” he said, picking it up and offering her half.

She couldn’t resist. “But tell me this. If it’s not the five—maybe ten—pounds, then what is it? I know he thinks I’m cute, I know he likes spending time with me. According to you I have better—”
Breasts.
“So what is it?”

“Have you ever heard him thinking about your weight?” BJ asked.

“No,” Tess admitted.

“Then it’s not that.”

“But maybe he just doesn’t see me as sexy because of the extra weight. It’s subconscious.”

BJ shrugged. “Maybe he’s just never thought of you that way. Maybe he’d change his mind if he knew how you felt.”

“That’s what Mackenzie said. When we were talking to each other.”

“You won’t know unless you try. Throw down the gauntlet. What do you have to lose?”

My dignity?

BJ laughed.

Tess flushed.
Like you know anything about dignity.

“Ouch!” He held his hand to his heart. “I’m not the enemy here.”

He was right. He wasn’t the enemy. Teddy was the enemy. Sadie was the enemy.

“Just cover yourself in chocolate frosting and show up naked at his apartment.”

Tess smacked him on the arm as a group of junior guys approached their booth.

All you think about is sex,
Tess thought.

All anyone thinks about is sex. All the guy in front of us thinks about is sex, and
he’s
thinking about sex with his stepmom. Now, that’s wrong.

Tess laughed.
Not everyone thinks about sex all the time. I don’t.

Oh, please. Don’t tell me you don’t think about Teddy when you’re alone at night.

Tess’s jaw dropped. She did not!
Only sometimes! Omigod.

BJ smirked.

She turned her back to him.
Agh! Stop listening to me!

You’re a good kisser. You should just kiss Teddy. See what happens.

I am?

He nodded.
One of the best kissers I’ve been with.

Her heart swelled. She couldn’t help it.
Swear?

Swear.
His eyes brightened.
Do you know what you should do?

What?

Kiss me right now.

Are you crazy?

Think about it. How jealous would Teddy be if you kissed me?

Not jealous at all. He doesn’t like me.

He just doesn’t think of you in that way. But if he sees you making out with me, he’ll start.

You just want to make out with me. Or any other girl with a beating heart.

He shook his head.
Not any other. But you, yes. It’s true.

This whole conversation was ridiculous. Tess saw BJ’s point, but she was not just going to make out with him.

You’ve probably made out with a hundred girls since eighth grade.

Forty-two.

She rolled her eyes.
Yeah, right.

It’s the truth.

Liar.

You can’t lie in your thoughts.

You can if you want to.

He smiled.
Point is, we kiss. Teddy realizes he loves you. I win, you win.

Tess stood on her tiptoes and looked around the room. She spotted Teddy near the balloon booth. “I’ll think about it,” she said. Incidentally, BJ wasn’t altogether repulsive.

Why thank you.
BJ made a small bow. “I’m at your service should you need me.”

“Hey, guys,” Mackenzie said. “I’m up. Who am I replacing?”

Here she is,
BJ thought.
The scarlet
M.

“I heard that,” Mackenzie said.

“I know you did. I’m sure you’ve heard worse. And scarlet is my favorite color. I still think you’re hot.”

Case in point,
Tess thought.
You’d hook up with anyone.

Mackenzie looked hurt.
Hello? I thought we were friends.

We are friends. But I’m still mad at you about the weight thing.

I’m sorry! I’m a moron! That isn’t news!

You’re not a moron. But I’m not ready to forgive you yet.
She didn’t look at Mackenzie while she thought it. “You can stay with BJ.”

Mackenzie peered into the tent. “Who’s inside?”

“Olivia and Pi.”

“I think Levi is switching with me at some point,” BJ said.

“Oh, joy.”

“Is Cooper here?” BJ asked.

“I don’t think he showed,” Mackenzie said.

“Can’t really blame the guy,” Tess said.

We couldn’t blame him one bit.

*  *  *

Spotting Mackenzie across the gym made Cooper even more miserable. She was talking to BJ as though everything were fine with the world.

Everything was not fine. Everything was a mess.

“Can I get my face painted now?” Ashley asked him, pulling his hand.

“Yup.” He hadn’t wanted to come, but he knew Ashley would enjoy it and he wanted to make his sister as happy as possible before her world imploded.

He took her to get her face painted by two senior girls. She sat on a bar stool trying to stay perfectly still as the girls painted cat whiskers on her cheeks. After this Cooper planned to take her to hair braiding.

Truth was, Cooper was enjoying spending the day with her. She was the only person he wanted to be around, since she was the only person who didn’t lie. She said what she thought. She thought what she said.

Hey, Cooper, in defense of us and the rest of the world, Ashley was only three. She hadn’t fully learned how to filter her thoughts yet.

Cooper just couldn’t stand being around liars.

He knew he was sounding a little Holden Caulfield–esque calling everyone a phony, but he really did think everyone was a phony.

The senior taking his twenty bucks to get in the door? A phony. “Hey, man, how are you, good to see you. Glad you could come.”
What’s that kid’s name again?

The junior who sold him and Ashley cookies: “I hope you like them! I made them myself!”
I bought them at Crumbs, but no one will know.

Cooper knew. We all knew.

Oops,
thought the girl painting on a whisker.
Messed that up a little. Oh well.

“You messed it up,” Cooper blurted out. “Please fix it.”

“What’s wrong?” Ashley asked him. “Is it pretty?”

“Very pretty,” Cooper said, “once she fixes her mistake.” He glared at the girl and said, “Make it perfect, will you?”

The girl blinked. And then blinked again.
He wants me to make a perfect cat face?

Yes.
That was exactly what he wanted. A perfect cat face. Was that too much to ask? Did everything in life have to be messed up? He took a deep breath. He was overdoing it. It wasn’t the face painter’s fault that everyone was a liar. It wasn’t her fault that Mackenzie had cheated and lied to him. It wasn’t her fault that his parents’ marriage was falling apart. He sighed. “Just make it as good as you can, okay?”

The girl nodded. She took a paper towel and wiped away a small line.

“That’s better,” Cooper said. Honestly, he couldn’t tell the difference. But he appreciated the effort.

Cooper looked back across the room. Mackenzie was collecting money from a junior who was going into the Madame Tribeca tent.

She’d left a message on his phone that morning, asking if he was going. “I miss you,” she’d said. “I heard what’s happening with your parents. I’m here if you want to talk.”

He missed her too. A lot.

He wondered if they should get back together. Sure, on the surface, breaking up seemed like the right thing to do. Girl cheated on guy, guy broke up with girl.

But now he saw that things weren’t so black and white. Everyone lied. Everyone cheated. Everyone was full of it. At least Mackenzie knew she’d made a mistake. At least her lies were on the table. And he really could use someone to talk to.

Ashley jumped off her chair. “Meow!”
Meow meow meow meow!

Someone who wasn’t three.

“Can my brother go next?” Ashley asked the senior. “Can you paint Spider-Man on him? Or Superman? Or maybe Wonder Woman?”

“Sure,” the senior said. “Is your brother a superhero?”

“He is,” she said proudly.

“I can do Spider-Man,” the girl said.

“Go for it,” Cooper said, and sat down in his chair. Cooper did not feel like a superhero. But what the hell.

Pi stretched her arms above her head.

Olivia had done a fantastic job at the fortune-teller booth. And thanks to Olivia, Pi had never felt more powerful. In her little hot hands, she now had everyone’s secrets.

She’d gotten the goods on everything that was happening at our school. Crushes, college dreams, whatever. And it wasn’t just the kids’ secrets she knew. Grown-ups too. Bankers. Lawyers. Psychologists. Mostly parents who’d come with their kids, but still, the parents in that area ran most of New York. She now knew about drug addictions, affairs, abortions, investment-banking deals, and more.

What could she do with all that information? How could she use it? Without, you know, resorting to bribery? Before she’d become an Espie, she’d barely bothered to learn people’s names. Now she, alone, knew everything.

Olivia too.

But Olivia was hardly a threat.

Although Pi knew secrets would spread to the rest of us pretty fast. Not for the first time she wished she were the only one with telepathy.

“Hi!” she heard Olivia say now.

“Hey there, pretty,” the guy said.

Pi opened her eyes.
Who is that?

It’s Lazar,
Olivia thought.

Who?

My boyfriend.

“So what does my future hold?” he asked. “Does it see us going to another play tonight?”

“Should it?” Olivia asked.

“I think it should. Because I got tickets to
Night Walkers
!”

Another play?
Olivia thought.
Can’t we go out for dinner?

What’s wrong with plays?
Pi wondered.

Nothing. But the ones he gets tickets to are so boring. Musicals I get, but these are the talking-talking-talking-about-nothing plays. And the seats are really uncomfortable.

Then tell him you don’t want to go,
Pi thought.

I can’t do that!

“So?” Lazar asked. “Does it?
Time Out New York
gave it five stars!”

Maybe no one at Bloomberg was affected,
a new voice thought from the other side of the tent window. A woman’s voice.

Pi’s back stiffened.
Who was that?

I told you,
Olivia responded.
My boyfriend.

The voice continued:
Maybe that’s why no one has come forward. Or maybe they’re keeping the ability a secret.

The hairs on the back of Pi’s neck stood up. She didn’t recognize the voice. It sounded older. It definitely wasn’t one of us.
Is she talking about us?
Pi needed to see who it was. Immediately.

Pi tried to lift the side of the tent, but it was fastened down. She pressed her face against the small mesh window but couldn’t see anyone. Pi had to find out whom those thoughts belonged to before the woman got away.

She dropped her notebook into her knapsack—no way was she misplacing that—slid the bag over her shoulder, broke through the sheet, pushed her way past Olivia and a surprised-looking Lazar, and stormed out of the tent. The light made her blink. It was busy out there. Really busy. But whose voice had she heard?

She circled the tent, listening for voices and thoughts of the people swarming around her.

Why does my son always smell like BO? I know he showers.

Can anyone tell how high I am? Cupcakes! Want cupcakes! More cupcakes!

I think I have lice.

Pi circled around and around the tent, trying to find the woman. Who was it? She’d definitely sounded like she knew about the vaccines. How did she know? Had someone spilled the beans? No. Pi would know if one of us had. We wouldn’t be able to keep it from her.

This was not part of her plan. Not at all. She was in charge here. She would have to figure out who else knew what, and soon.