Draggah (37 page)

“
They would have killed me anyway,
”
Lexi said, her voice tight with anger.

“
I thought about that a lot,
”
Tiberius said. 
“
And you know what?  You
’
re right.  They wouldn
’
t have just taken the knife.  They would have seen you as weak.  They would have beaten you and probably raped you, perhaps even killed you.  I get it.  You did what you had to do.
”

“
This is different, Tiberius,
”
Lexi said.

“
Different how?  If we gave in to their demands, what would have happened next?  We would have basically been saying that if you attack us there are no consequences.
”

“
Rafe killed two of them,
”
Lexi argued. 
“
Don
’
t you think that is consequence enough?
”

“
They
’
re mad because we fought back, well too bad,
”
Tiberius said.

“
So now you
’
re going to fight them again?
”

“
No, I
’
m going to heal Rafe and he will fight them.
”

“
And what if you can
’
t heal Rafe?
”
Lexi said. 
“
What if he doesn
’
t wake up from whatever Olyva gave him?
”

A cold wave of doubt crashed on Tiberius.  He knew that if that happened, he would have to fight the big warrior himself.  He could never let anyone but Rafe fight for him, and then only because he trusted Rafe
’
s skills with a sword so much he doubted that anyone could defeat him.

“
Then I
’
ll fight,
”
he said quietly.

“
You
’
ll fight that Rogu warrior?
”
Lexi said. 
“
Are you mad?  He
’
s almost twice your size.
”

“
I
’
ve fought the Graypees,
”
Tiberius said. 
“
I led the fight against that giant Draccon.  You really think I can
’
t fight a single man?
”

“
This is different, Ti.  Think about it.  You
’
re exhausted.  If you spend all day working magic, trying to heal Rafe and end up having to fight, what shape will you be in?
”

Tiberius had to admit he wouldn
’
t be ready to fight anyone if his efforts to heal Rafe failed.  And Lexi was right, they had no idea what effect Olyva
’
s ministrations might have had on Rafe.  He might not wake up for days.  Even if Tiberius was successful healing his friend, Rafe
’
s body had endured a great deal of abuse.  He might not be back to full strength for a long time.  Still, Tiberius felt he had done the right thing.  He couldn
’
t back down from an enemy because he was afraid.  It didn
’
t matter what the Hoskali customs were, the raiders had attacked first.  Rafe had every right to defend himself, his tribe, and their property with whatever means were available.

“
We
’
ll just have to see what happens,
”
Tiberius said. 
“
I
’
m sorry.
”

“
Sorry won
’
t be much use if you get killed,
”
Lexi said. 
“
I knew better than to trust you, Tiberius.  You don
’
t live in the real world.
”

“
What
’
s that supposed to mean?
”
Tiberius asked.

“
It means you
’
ve lived your whole life in a palace, where you have zero responsibilities.  You have no idea what it takes to survive.  You could have swallowed your pride.  We have more than enough captives to trade back for all we lost and repay the raiders for Rafe
’
s butchery.
”

“
But Rafe did nothing wrong,
”
Tiberius insisted. 
“
I
’
m not going to pretend he did for the sake of peaceful negotiation.
”

“
No, you
’
ll just get yourself killed,
”
Lexi said. 
“
Then what happens to me?  Huh?  What happens to Olyva?  To all the women of this tribe?
”

“
I won
’
t die,
”
Tiberius said angrily.

“
You don
’
t know that,
”
Lexi replied. 
“
If you are defeated, Rafe will be killed.  He
’
s an outsider and the new chief will want vengeance for the Rogu he killed.  I
’
ll be traded like cattle, married to some stranger who will think he can do whatever he wants to me.
”

“
Don
’
t think like that,
”
Tiberius said.

“
Don
’
t you get it?
”
Lexi was angry now, her voice carrying in the camp. 
“
I have to think like that.  I don
’
t have the luxury of depending on anyone else to help me.  Every person I meet wants something from me, Ti.  They
’
re all potential threats.
”

“
Not everyone—”

“
Yes, Tiberius.  Every single person.  Even you.  You want me to love you and tell you what a great a leader you are.  You want me to fall in line like a palace servant, lauding your every decision and never questioning anything you do.  I will never be that person.
”

“
That
’
s not what I want.
”

“
You want me to let down my defenses and pretend everything is okay when it is clearly not okay.  You can
’
t have things both ways, Ti.
”

“
Lexi, please,
”
Tiberius said, hoping to calm her down. 
“
I didn
’
t mean to frighten you.
”

“
You haven
’
t just frightened me.  You
’
ve put me in an impossible position.  You want me to stay, but it’s too great a risk.
”

“
What are you saying?
”

“
You know what I
’
m saying,
”
she said, her gaze unwavering.

“
You can
’
t be serious.  Where are you going to go?
”

“
I have no idea, but I can
’
t stay in a relationship with someone who doesn
’
t include me in their decisions.  I love you, Ti, but you
’
re reckless.
”

Lexi turned and stalked away.  Tiberius started to go after her, but Te
’
sumee caught his arm.  The Rogu leader was obviously distressed.  Tiberius realized that his anger with the raiders had influenced his decisions and left the tribe in a poor position.

“
I
’
m sorry,
”
Tiberius said.

“
You must see to Rafe,
”
Te
’
sumee said. 
“
He will need time to prepare for the Tuscogee.
”

“
You
’
re right,
”
Tiberius said.

He followed the Rogu leader back to where Rafe was sleeping.  Tiberius felt horrible.  He had been naive in thinking he was smart enough to lead the tribe.  He
’
d been around strong leaders all his life.  His father had ruled Avondale with an iron fist, and Tiberius had always thought that if he were to become Earl, he would do things differently.  Yet he was guilty of doing the same thing his father had done.  Aegus had made decisions that Tiberius thought were selfish and sometimes cruel, but Tiberius had been just as selfish by insisting that the tribe stand on principles they never claimed to believe in.  Tiberius had put his own beliefs ahead of the needs of his tribe, and he might end up paying for that mistake with his life.

He paced in front of Rafe, his emotions too distraught to focus on the healing spell.  He didn
’
t know where Lexi had gone and he felt abandoned.  Yet he couldn
’
t just leave the tribe and go in search of her. He had committed himself to the Tuscogee and he had no choice but to see it through.

“
You must try to heal him,
”
Te
’
sumee said. 
“
Bu
’
yorgi is a great warrior.
”

“
I just need a little time,
”
Tiberius said.

“
There is no time, Tiswanee.  We must act while we can.
”

“
You
’
re right,
”
Tiberius agreed. 
“
See that I
’
m not disturbed.
”

He knelt down by Rafe and tried to clear his mind.  It was difficult.  He felt like weeping in frustration.  He was angry at Lexi for leaving him when he needed her most, and angry at himself for not making her feel like being with him was a safe place.  He wanted to find her and beg her to stay.  He needed to let her know that he would change, that he could include her in his decisions and not act so impulsively.  He wanted to send the Rogu to bring her back to him, but that was exactly the kind of arrogant abuse of power that had driven her away.

He put his hand on Rafe
’
s bare arm.  The skin was hot and feverish.  Tiberius realized his friend was worse off than he had thought.  Whatever Olyva had given him was masking the seriousness of his condition.  Tiberius tried to clear his mind again.  He focused on the words of the spell, bracing himself mentally for the power of the magic.

“
Acies Penetralis Deprimo Sano Crudus Viscus,
”
he said quietly.

The storm of power erupted around him, but this time Tiberius was ready for it.  It almost felt good to feel the strength of the magic buffeting his mind now that he knew what to expect and that he could control it.  He let his consciousness slide into Rafe
’
s battered body.  He could feel the aches and bruises from the previous night
’
s battle.  Rafe
’
s chest was bruised, his forehead aching from the head butt he
’
d delivered, and his shoulder was so painful that Tiberius was scared to move forward with the spell.  He knew the
Corporeus Adfectus
would transfer Rafe
’
s pain to Tiberius.  The thought was a little like the idea of plunging his own hand into a smith
’
s forge.  It took Tiberius several minutes to work up the courage.

When the pain hit, Tiberius clamped his mouth shut so tightly to keep from screaming that he tasted blood.  Nothing had hurt like the dislocated shoulder.  The pain wasn
’
t just intense, it was constant.  Tiberius was frozen for what seemed like an eternity in a battle to control the pain and the raging magic.  He felt like he was on the precipice of a high mountain.  On one side was the excruciating pain that threatened to overwhelm him.  On the other side was the raging magic, which threatened to break loose from his mental control.  He had to stay focused and balance the two extreme forces.

After a while, he let the healing magic flow into Rafe.  Pressure built in his friend
’
s ruined shoulder.  Something needed to happen, but Tiberius didn
’
t know what.  The flow of healing magic only made the intense pain worse.  He tried a different tack, letting the healing magic flow all through Rafe
’
s body.  The pain in his chest eased, the ache in his head faded, but the shoulder still felt horrible.  It was as if there was something blocking the healing that the magic wanted to usher in and the more he tried to heal Rafe, the more pressure and pain Tiberius felt.  It was like a blockage to a stream that was causing a flood, and Tiberius couldn
’
t understand what was hindering his efforts.