Dragon Apocalypse (The Berserker and the Pedant Book 2) (8 page)

Inside the great wall, the frost giant led them to a great hall.
 
It was enormous and carved from solid ice.
 
They sat at a great table, also carved from the ice, with animal skins on the seats to provide some protection from the cold for guests.
 
A frost giant woman sat at one end of the table and stood up as they came in.
 
The giant kissed her and turned back to the party.

“Posdravi.
 
Ja sam Mirza,” he said, gesturing to himself.
 
“Mirza.”

“Your name is Mirza?”
 
Pellonia asked, gesturing towards him.
 
She pointed at herself and said, “My name is Pellonia.
 
Well met, Mirza.”

The giant nodded and said, “Ovo je Alja,” while gesturing towards the frost giant woman.
 
“Alja.”

“Alja,” Pellonia said, nodding her head.
 
Pellonia introduced the rest of the group and they all sat at the frozen table.
 
They had a great feast of roasted meat on sticks, served with onions and flat bread, a large pot of stew, and a sweet bread twisted into a spiral and also served on a stick.

“They sure like their food on a stick,” Maximina said.
 
“It’s quite tasty though.”

“Perhaps it keeps the heat of the food off of their hands,” Pellonia remarked, mouth full of sweet bread.
 
“They are frost giants after all.”

After dinner, Ohm played more music, including songs of the frost giants, while they sipped on fruit brandy.
 
The frost giants, Mirza and Alja, were quite charming hosts, and having not had guests in such a long time, were overjoyed.
 
They were rather overgenerous and made gifts to our heroes.
 

They bestowed upon Gurken a mystical ice axe, Sjekira.
 
It was made from solid ice that, they assured our friends, would not melt and was enchanted to freeze any foes it struck.

Pellonia was gifted a bracelet called Narukvica, that bestowed on its wearer an immunity to cold. Whoever wore it would know no chill, no matter how deep the freeze.

Maximina obtained the mystic hammer Cekic.
 
Any that struck her in combat would freeze in an instant, and one blow from Cekic would shatter them.

Ohm turned down any offer of a gift, saying he was perfectly happy with what he had and had no wish to deprive their hosts.
 
He did eventually relent and accepted some salted cod for Apocalypse, who, to Ohm’s consternation and Pellonia’s delight, purred with satisfaction while consuming it.

After staying the night and breaking their fast with a small meal, they wished their hosts farewell and continued on to the floating city of Arendal.

C
HAPTER
S
EVEN

The Berserker and the Bag

“WHAT’S YOUR OCCUPATION?” asked the man guarding the entrance to Arendal.
 
He looked out at them through an opening in the wall at the entrance to the city.
 
Through the gate the could see a spiral staircase starting at the ground and spiraling up and up towards the floating city.
 
It disappeared into an enormous chunk of earth that the city sat upon.
 
They’d been waiting in line for over an hour to get to this point.

“We’re adventurers,” Pellonia said.

“Adventurers, you say.” He wrote down a rather large number on a piece of parchment.
 
“There’s a hefty tax on adventurers in the city.
 
Where are you traveling from?”

“We come from the dragon’s cave south of the ice wall.”

“So, you’re dragon slayers then,” he exclaimed, adding a zero to the end of the number.

“No, we, uh, we didn’t kill any dragons there.”

“Have you ever killed a dragon?”

“Well, as to that…”

“Yes?”

Pellonia sighed, “Yes, we have.”

The guard put a big checkmark next to the amount on the paper.”

“And what professions do each of you have?”

“A templerager, a… hey Maximina, what’s your profession?”

“I’m a half-underelven psychic ranger.
 
With a dash of necromantic wizardry, which is how I learned to use scrolls.
 
And a rogue, but only for the backstabbing.
 
Also, some samurai training, enough to use katanas, anyway.”

“That’s rather a lot of prof—” began the guard.
 

“Also, a smidgen of sorcery. I was once rather enamored by their ability to frequently cast the magic arrow spell.”

“I’m out of room on the form.”

“Also, sword dancer.
 
That seemed a good idea at the time.”

The guard sighed.
 
“Psychic, check. Ranger, check.
 
Necromancer, check.
 
Big tax there.
 
Rogue, another big tax there. Samurai, check.
 
Sorcerer, check.
 
I’ll have to write in sword dancer under other, haven’t heard of that one,” said the guard.
 
“Well, that’s all the boxes, no need to go on.”

“Wait,” said Ohm.
 
“I,” Ohm drew out the syllable before continuing, “am a bard.”

The guard looked Ohm over and nodded. “I can see that.
 
No additional taxes for a bard.”

“Because we contribute so much joy to the locals?” Ohm asked.

“Because you’re unlikely to have any money,” said the guard.

“Here’s your tax bill,” the guard said, handing the parchment to Pellonia.

“We haven’t got that much money,” Pellonia said, not bothering to take the bill before answering.

“No matter,” said the guard.
 
“You can hand over a few of your magical items until such a time as you’re able to afford the taxes.
 
Upon which time we shall return the items.”
 
The guard took a pair of spectacles and put them on.
 
“That magic axe, bracelet, and hammer ought to do it,” he said, pointing at the items the frost giants had just bestowed upon them.

Pellonia crinkled her brow and Maximina said, “That’s robbery!
 
We earned these fair and square.”

“Everyone has to pay taxes, dear,” said the guard.
 
“How else do you think we pay for the wonders of Arendal?
 
It’s expensive to keep an entire city floating in the air.
 
If you don’t want to pay, you can’t come inside.
 
Simple as that.
 
No harm, no foul.”

“What if we say we’re simple farmers?” Maximina asked.

“Well, then, that would be a sight cheaper, but we’d have to confiscate all of your magic items and treasures and lock you up, as you would be guilty of adventuring without a license.
 
Which reminds me, can I please see your adventuring license so I can get the ID number and make sure the taxes are applied to the appropriate account?”

Pellonia glared at Maximina and looked back at the guard and smiled.
 
“Funny story, we lost our adventuring license in the dragon’s cave.”
 
Pellonia chuckled.

“No problem, what’s your ID number?”

“Four,” Maximina said.
 
The guard wrote that down and looked back up, at which time Maximina said, “two,” and she continued to rattle off numbers every time the guard looked up. “Seven, one, five, five, six, eight, seven, nine.”

The guard took out a tome and looked up the number in the book.
 
“Let’s see here, ah. The Lightning Brigade?” the guard asked.

“Yes, that’s us,” said Pellonia.
 
“The Lightning Brigade.”

“Then why are all of these magic items ice weapons and not lightning weapons?”

“We, uh…” Pellonia started.

“We’re trying something new out,” said Ohm.
 
“We’re thinking of changing our name to The Frozen Mafia.
 
What do you think?”

The guard flipped through the book.
 
“Sorry. The Frozen Mafia is taken.”

“Chill Squad?”
 

“Taken.”
 

“Stone Cold Killers?”
 

“Taken.”
 

“Ice Capaders?”
 

“There ya go, that one’s available.”
 

“That one’s stupid.”
 

“That’s why it’s available.
 
But you can’t change your name here, you have to go the Bureau of Adventurers Guild.
 
BAG for short.
 
Now, if you’re going to stay in the city, please hand over your items.”

Pellonia handed Sjerkira, Narukvica, and Cekic over to the man guarding the entrance to Arendal.

“Let’s see here,” the guard said.
 
“One mystic ice axe, one mystic ice bracelet, and one mystic ice hammer.”
 
The guard handed them a receipt, which read, “This receipt entitles the bearers, a/an adventuring party registered as
The Lightning Brigade
, to receive
one mystic axe, one mystic bracelet, and one mystic hammer
in exchange for the sum of
193,621
pieces of gold within 30 days of the issuance of the receipt.”

“One hundred ninety three thousand pieces of gold!
 
How are we supposed to pay that?” Maximina shouted.

“Go and see BAG,” the guard said.
 
“You’ll have to locate a sponsor among the nobility.
 
They can help you out and pay the bail on your items.
 
They can also help you find quests.”

“And places that will pay for me to play?” said Ohm, hopefully.

“Meh.
 
Mostly, bards perform for exposure in Arendal,” said the guard.
 
“Until such a time as they can find a patron.
 
But if you’re good, that shouldn’t take much time.
 
A few years at most.”

“What? A few years?”

“You’ve got to pay your dues,” the guard suggested.

“That’s an atrocious point of view. What am I to do in the meantime?”

The guard shrugged. “Why do you think so many bards spend time with adventuring parties instead of taverns?”

Ohm nodded. “A fair point.
 
Very well.”

“Also, the horse must have its feet wrapped while in the city.
 
Can’t have it walking about damaging the roads.”
 
The guard held up four small burlap sacks and some twine.

“I’m sorry,” said the unicorn. “You want to wrap my feet?
 
I think not, good sir, I think not!”
 
The unicorn stomped its hoof, chipping the rock of the road.

The guard looked at the damaged road, looked back up at the unicorn and shrugged. “Not a problem for me, but I’m afraid you can’t come into the city.”

“That suits me fine,” the unicorn said.
 
“I never liked cities anyway.
 
Ohm, I’ll meet you back at the cave when you’re done playing bard.”

“Next!” said the lady at the counter in the Bureau of Adventurers Guild, a bored expression on her face.

Pellonia confidently strode forward and smiled at the woman.

“How can I help you?” said the woman.

“My friends and I are a party of adventurers newly arrived in the city.
 
They
 
confiscated our items at the gate and and gave us an obscenely large bill.
 
They said to come here and you could help us get them back.”

“Let me see your adventurer’s license.”

“I’m afraid we don’t have one of those.”

“I see. I’m afraid there is a fine for that.”
 
She took out a piece of paper and began to write on it.

“But we’ve only just arrived in the city. We had no idea a license was needed.”

“Ignorance of the law is no excuse.
 
You’ll have to obtain a permit,” she said, writing down a number on a piece of paper.