Dreams of Perfection (Dreams Come True) (17 page)

Chapter 33

Two weeks later, Darcy showed the caterer to her kitchen so she could set up for the party and then returned to help Millie with the decorations, doing her best to calm her frayed nerves. The source of her nerves wasn’t the party. Darcy could throw a shindig with the best of them. The source of the nerves was the shindig’s honoree.

Months ago, Darcy had happily volunteered to throw Josh a party in celebration of his partnership in her father’s law firm. But that was before their recent sexscapade. Nevertheless, a promise was a promise.

It wasn’t as if she didn’t
want
to throw her best friend a party, she did. But did the party have to follow so closely on the heels of their . . . illicit encounter? If she got through it without spontaneously combusting in mortification it would be a miracle.

“Darcy, where do you think we should have guests put any cards and gifts?”

“We can clear off the small console table in the foyer.”

“Perfect.” Millie carried her ever-present clipboard and ticked off her schedule of events for the evening. “First, the honoree will say a few words, followed by your father, and the honoree’s mother.”

Butterflies danced in Darcy’s stomach. She loved Josh’s mom, but seeing her after having had door-sex with her son would be as mortifying as seeing Josh again.

“Next, we’ll open the buffet line. After everyone has filled their plates, we’ll begin the slide show—”

With the help of some of Josh’s colleagues, and his mother, Darcy’d put together a slide show of photos from law school, the day he graduated, the day he passed the bar, and the day he won his first case.

Mixed in were shots from around the office, like the one of Josh’s office after his colleagues decorated it in honor of the Yankees’ 2009 World Series win, another one of him in one of the firm’s conference rooms, the table covered in documentary evidence for an upcoming trial and Josh with his head on the table sound asleep. Then there were the photos of him with clients from the Women’s Legal Fund of Harlem, including Kelly, all set to “Razzle Dazzle” from
Chicago
.

“Followed by much drunken revelry, with guests dancing around with lampshades on their heads,” Darcy interjected, dryly.

Millie frowned at Darcy. “That’s not on the list and you know it.”

“Relax, Millie. I bet even if we don’t stick to your schedule, everyone will have a good time, and we’ll still hit the evening’s high points.”

“Just trying to be helpful,” Millie said, sliding the pen behind her ear.

Relax, she says. A case of do as I say, not as I do, if I ever saw one.
How could she relax when every time she looked at Josh her knees turned to Jell-O and her stomach felt as if she were riding Coney Island’s Cyclone roller coaster?

Darcy stepped back to review their handiwork. The living room furniture had been pushed up against the walls, leaving space for the partiers. The dining room table awaited trays loaded with some of Josh’s favorites, including her gourmet pigs in a blanket.

Through the kitchen, on the other side of the stairs, they’d set up a bar area featuring wine, beer, water, and mixers. The revelers could spill out her back door and into her snug garden, now covered by a tent with tiny white lights that would twinkle once the sun set. The DJ would set up there. She’d promised her neighbors the noise would be over no later than eleven o’clock. The only thing left for Darcy to do was to get dressed. And strap on a pair while she was at it. Yep. Time to put on a dress, and man up.

Darcy put the finishing t
ouches on her appearance, hoping her cool blue-and-white Tory Burch dress would soothe her frayed nerves, while Laura sat on her bed and tapped out one email after another. “I’m going to have that thing surgically removed,” Darcy said, glancing at Laura in her mirror.

“Just try it,” Laura shot back.

Earlier, Laura had peered into Darcy’s face and asked if she was okay. Darcy blamed her dark circles on Blake’s absence, when really she’d barely given Blake more than a passing thought, which only added to her misery.

Millie knocked and then came in as Darcy slipped on her strappy fuchsia sandals. “Millie, you can change in the spare bedroom if you’d like.”

“Change?” Millie glanced down at her dull brown dress, confusion altering her otherwise unflappable demeanor. “Why would I change?”

“You mean you’re wearing that?” Laura asked, her face a study in horror, her smartphone forgotten in the shock.

The shapeless brown dress boasted small sprigs of flowers reminiscent of a 1920’s floral wallpaper pattern. Over it, Millie had pulled on an oversized cardigan, in an unflattering cross between mustard yellow and overcooked-asparagus green.

“Yes.” She lifted a brow in defiance. “I don’t understand the question.”

“Where ever did you find it?” Laura asked, looking as if she’d just swallowed a bug. “Never mind. There must be something we can do.” She walked into Darcy’s closet and began pulling out and discarding various belts. Settling on a narrow gold belt, she wrapped it around Millie’s diminutive waist and fastened it. Standing back, her hands on her hips, she assessed Millie’s shape. “You actually have a figure hiding under those baggy clothes you wear.”

Turning back to the closet, she found a sunny yellow shrug and ordered Millie to take off the yellow-green monster and put on the shrug. Millie rolled her eyes, but complied.

Darcy and Laura stepped back. Darcy cocked her head, thinking Millie looked quite put-upon. And schlumpy. Schlumpier than she had without the belt and shrug. Darcy cut Laura a look, made a face, then shook her head.

“Okay. Fine.” Laura removed the items and tossed them on the bed and snatched up her phone. “You win. For now. But your day is coming. Consider yourself warned,” she tossed over her shoulder as she left the room.

Josh’s feelings ran the gamut. Satisf
action in having attained a long-held goal. Joy at having his mother here to celebrate with him. Dread at seeing Darcy again and facing the reality of his decision to move on. How could so many divergent feelings exist in a person at once, he wondered?

Josh glanced over at his mom and smiled. She had a death-grip on the door of the taxi as it sped through traffic. She gasped as the taxi stopped barely inches from the bumper of the car in front of them.

“We’re going to be killed. How can you sit there so calm?”

“You get used to it.”

He hadn’t seen Darcy in two weeks. Not since he’d left her house determined to move on. The question he’d failed to answer during that time was how did he move on and yet still keep her friendship? You couldn’t find an answer to that question in law books.

“We’re here.”

“Thank God,” his mother breathed.

Josh tossed the driver some bills and helped his mother out. He hesitated before reaching for the brass doorknob on Darcy’s front door.

“Are you all right?” his mother asked.

“Yes. Just nervous.”

“Well, for heaven’s sake, what do you have to be nervous about? These are your friends, and they’re throwing you a party.”

“Right.” He opened the door, calling out “Hello” as entered.

“Josh. Hi.” Darcy didn’t look him in the eye, cho
osing instead to gaze beyond him at the painting hanging in the foyer. Her stomach executed a perfect somersault.

“Hey, Darce.” He didn’t reach for her, just maintained a safe distance.

“Hi, Janet.”
I had sizzling hot door-sex with your son.
“It’s so good to see you!” Darcy hugged his mom, who then held Darcy at arm’s length.

“I think you get more beautiful every time I see you. Doesn’t she, Josh?”

Darcy could feel Josh’s eyes on her face as her cheeks burned.

“Every time,” he muttered.

Laura sauntered up. “Vampire.” 

“Succubus.”

“What’s the difference between a lawyer and a vampire?”

“A vampire only sucks blood at night.”

“Damn,” she muttered, before turning to his mom. “Hi, Janet, how are you?” She leaned in and brushed her cheek.

Long used to Laura and Josh’s barbs, Josh’s mom returned Laura’s kiss and let her lead her into the living room, leaving Josh and Darcy alone.

The tension, as tangible between them as any wall, tormented her. How do they get back to just Darcy and Josh?

“Thanks, Darcy.” Josh broke the silence. “For doing this.” He took her hand and held it, his touch casual and friendly, but the frisson of desire his touch brought her intensified the flush.  

She gave him a hesitant smile. “Of course. It’s my pleasure.”

She could see a sliver of light through the tiny crack that just opened in the wall.

Chapter 34

Josh good-naturedly accepted the hearty backslaps, the hugs and kisses, and the drinks one person after the next pressed on him, all the while roaming the party keeping Darcy, beautiful as always, in his sights.

Her usually straight hair hung thick with waves, just begging to be touched, but the blush that rose to her cheeks when she’d greeted him couldn’t hide the dark circles under her eyes.

He wondered if she could lay the blame for her sleepless nights on him, Blake, or the party. Whatever the reason, he hated to see her so distressed.

He’d never be able to convey how much he appreciated all the effort she’d put into this party. When she’d offered to throw him a bash, he’d been honored. She’s always been there for him—a little less now with Blake in the picture—but for the big things, she hadn’t let him down.

He owed it to her to be a good friend—to be there for her no matter what—to put their momentary heart-pounding, blood-pulsing lapse in judgment behind them.
If that’s what she wants,
I can do that.
Her laughter floated across the room, sultry and sweet, making his heart stutter.
Or not.

The drinks f
lowed, the food vanished, the conversation hummed, and the music pulsated. Darcy took a spin around the tent outside, ensuring Josh’s guests were having a good time.

The video was a hit, with the throng
oohing
,
ahing
, and laughing over the photos. Toasts were made, jokes told, and congratulations offered. The initial anxiety notwithstanding, Darcy declared the party a huge success. 

She and Josh avoided any close contact all evening, reducing the anxiety to a manageable level. He looked so sexy in his white button-down and dark-wash jeans. Had he always been that sexy and she’d just never noticed? Or did having mind-altering sex with him, well, alter her mind? What difference did it make, how or when it happened? She had to get Josh out of her head.

Darcy watched as Cindy and Martin, still wearing their newlywed glow, danced as if they were the only two people in the world. Her heart ached at the sight. Happy for them, confused for herself.

Her father gave Janet a spin, while her mother cut the rug with Mark. Her mom had rhythm, Darcy had to give her that. Kelly boogied with Daniel, who looked as if he wanted to be anywhere but on the dance floor with his mother. Gloria did a little bump-and-grind with Chris, who’d apparently had one too many.

Check that
, Darcy thought, as he made a grab for Gloria’s ass,
more like twenty too many.

Laura sidled up next to her, champagne glass in hand. “I think Josh’s friend there is wasted.” She pointed to Chris with her glass. “Wonderful party, Darce. You going to throw a big shindig for me when I make VP?”

“Of course. But wouldn’t you rather have it at your parents’ house?”

Laura leveled her ‘How long have you been on this planet?’ look at her.

“Right.”

Darcy frowned when she spied Millie standing on the fringes of the party, as if she wanted nothing more than to fade into the night. Before she could make up her mind to go talk to her, Josh approached her. Darcy watched as Josh held out his hand for her. At first Millie shook her head no, but Josh flashed his boyish grin and she relented. Taking his hand, she let him lead her to a corner of the dance floor, away from the crowd, away from the spotlight. 

Darcy’s vision blurred as Josh gathered a reluctant Millie into his arms for a slow dance. In that instant, Darcy knew. She loved Josh. She loved his generous heart, his benevolent soul, and his beautiful mind. She loved his capacity for empathy and his limitless determination to not only be a better person, but to inspire those around him to want to do the same.

She pressed a hand to the fluttering in her stomach.

“Are you okay?” Laura studied Darcy’s face.

“Yeah. I’m having a moment.” She gestured to Josh and Millie, blinking away her tears and covering the real reason for her reaction.

“Aww.” Laura tilted her head. “Even I can see why you’re having a moment. How sweet is that!”  

Darcy couldn’t respond, too afraid her voice would reveal the depth of her emotions. Remembering the champagne in her hand, she took a sip.

“So what’s up with you and Josh? You two are circling one another like a politician and a reporter over a sex scandal.”

Darcy choked on her champagne, sending bubbles up her nose. Coughing and wheezing, her eyes watering even more, as Laura patted her on the back.

“You’re supposed to drink it, not snort it. Here, have some water.” She snatched a bottle from the passing waiter.

Darcy waved the water away and used the incident as an excuse to avoid responding to Laura’s too-close-for-comfort observation. Having narrowly made her escape, Darcy dashed up the stairs for a few moments to allow herself time to regroup and adjust to tonight’s startling revelation.

Finding the solitude of her bedroom, she closed the door and paced her room. The music thrummed down below, as the muted sound of laughter floated up the stairs.

She realized, with stunning clarity, that she’d never loved Doug, because she didn’t feel one-tenth of what she felt for Josh. She’d only been in love with who she
wanted
Doug to be. He’d hurt her, no doubt about that. But when you trusted someone and they abused that trust, of course you ached.

Darcy picked up the photo of Josh at his graduation, holding up a bottle of cheap champagne someone had given him. Just when she thought things couldn’t get any more complicated. How long? How long had she loved him? Setting the photo back on the dresser, she took a deep breath, then released it.

What now? What should she do about it? Josh had never indicated he felt anything for her but friendship. Well, except for the sex. But lust and love are two different things, and you didn’t need the latter to feel the former.

Armed with this new knowledge, she’d just . . . be patient. See if Josh threw off any vibes. If impulsive sex wasn’t enough to botch a perfectly good friendship, then a one-sided confession of love could send it right over the cliff to an untimely death.   

Satisfied with her decision, she touched up her makeup, ran her fingers through her hair, and headed back down stairs. She stopped in her tracks at the bottom of the stairs, her hand to her mouth.
Jiminy Cricket!
She’d forgotten about Blake.