Edge of Instinct: Rabids Book 1 (2 page)

“Okay, I promise, no mutant losers. Now try to relax.”

“Good kid.” He smiled weakly and sighed, the tension visibly escaping his body as he closed his eyes. “You know my biggest regret?”

Amiel looked at him in puzzlement for a moment, taken by surprise at the sudden change in subject. “Never marrying Maxine DeLauro when you had the chance?” Maxine had been the one girl Jaron had been in a serious relationship with, the one that ended in disaster and sent him hightailing it to Texas. It was the typical high school sweethearts’ story; they fell in love and planned on getting married after high school- at least until Jaron decided he was going into the military. It was a fight that carried on for months. Maxine wanted him to join her father’s law firm, and Jaron said he’d rather die. She threw a fit and promised to leave him if he joined. He joined and she left. Maxine never understood his need to serve and protect others. Not two weeks later he went to her house, intent on begging her to change her mind. He walked in to find her and his best friend Randy ‘getting frisky’ on the couch. A week later, she married Randy in Vegas, and they were pregnant before the honeymoon was over. Needless to say, Randy was his
ex
best friend.

“You know if you had asked me that a few months ago I might have yes,” he said, giving her a knowing smirk. “But I ran into Randy two months ago. He’d joined up too.” His smirk turned into a broad smile as he watched her expression change. He reminded her in that moment of the man he used to be. With his coughing fit in check for the moment it was easier for Amiel to pretend they were simply talking, just like the way they always had in the good old days.

“What! After that big fit she threw over you joining up,
he
joins?” she exclaimed in disbelief. Jaron smiled at the memory.

“Pretty screwed up right? His unit was passing through, and they bunked over in our barracks for a couple days.” She sucked in an angry breath.

“Did you give him what he deserved?”

“Yep. A great, big, hug,” he said. Amiel raised her eyebrows in confusion. She was expecting a great big black eye at the very least. “As it turns out, the skank was cheating on me with another guy
before
her and Randy. And the kid she was pregnant with? Not even his kid. Or mine,” he added wryly, before she could ask. “That proud title belongs to a used car salesman in town apparently. Can you believe I almost married that girl?” he scoffed. “Randy saved me a load of bunk to deal with. I’d have an unfaithful wife, a kid that wasn’t mine, and worst of all I’d be a lawyer.” He offered a comical grimace, making Amiel smile. Jaron reached over, patting her hand.

“No, Baby Girl, I’ll tell you what my biggest regret is. It’s leaving you in a world as depraved as this. I should have taught you how to survive it.” He motioned for Amiel to come closer. “Take these,” he said, pointing the dog tags around his neck. “I want you to have them.”

“Jaron…are you sure?” Amiel asked hesitantly, surprised. Since arriving at the hospital Jaron had flat out refused to remove his dog tags, much to the consternation of the doctors. They’d asked Amiel to reason with him, but she’d refused. If those tags were that important to him, she wouldn’t have dreamed of forcing them away from him.

“Amiel, I want you to take them. I
need
you to take them,” he said, his eyes pleading. Moved by the emotion she saw there, she carefully reached behind his neck and unclasped the chain. He fell weakly back against the pillows, looking more exhausted than before. He motioned wordlessly for her to put the dog tags on. She grew slightly dizzy as their weight settled against her chest, felt the feverish heat they had gained from laying against her dying brother’s skin. “Never take them off, Baby Girl, never…” He was panting now as he broke off. “They’re…special.”

“Just like me,” she said with a half-hearted attempt at humor. Jaron nodded.

“Just like you. It will be my one last way to be with you, protecting you.” He tipped his head back and closed his eyes again. His breathing was steady and he didn’t move. Amiel could see the edges of his lips curled in an ever-so-slight smile. She thought he had gone to sleep when he said softly, “Never take them off…promise me.”

“Okay, I promise, Jaron. They’ll never leave my neck,” she assured him. He smiled once more without opening his eyes. For the briefest moment Amiel allowed herself the faintest glimmer of hope that her brother, the man she admired most in the world, would fight off the sickness and survive.

“Alright, kiddo. Why don’t you go get something to eat in the cafeteria? I need my beauty sleep. It’s not easy looking as amazing as this.” He opened eyes glazed in pain offering a wink of encouragement before closing them once more. She looked down at her brother’s smiling face, admiring his strength. Even in his deepest moments of pain he tried to bring
her
comfort, find ways to make
her
smile.

Amiel leaned over to very lightly kiss his forehead. “I love you, Jaron. You’ll always be my hero.” She brushed her fingers over his before turning to leave the room.

Amiel headed down the wide empty hallway as she walked toward the cafeteria. Technically it wasn’t visiting hours yet, but given the unique situation her brother was in and her mother’s position in the city, Amiel could basically come and go as she pleased. Occasionally she would pass a nurse or the janitor who would nod at her in a friendly gesture. The night and day staff both knew her well by now.

She rubbed the dog tags as they hung clasped around her neck. She could almost imagine that they warmed beneath her fingers, throbbing with a comforting sensation. Ridiculous of course, they were just dog tags. She pulled them forward far enough to get a better look at them. Warm and tingly good sensations or not, they
were
unique tags. Amiel hadn’t really been around other military guys. Malinda was not a fan and mostly considered soldiers below her notice, so their presence was not often welcomed in their town. But she’d seen enough old movies to know these weren’t the way tags were normally worn. Jaron’s tags hung from a short black ball chain, so tight they had fit snuggly around his neck, but hung just past her own collar bone. Two strange rubber balls rested on each side of the bail holding the tags onto the chain. As she moved, the rubber balls kept the tags from deviating from their positions. She rather liked that factor, because it meant she wouldn’t have to keep readjusting the chain to place the clasp at the back of her neck. She absently rubbed the name and words stamped across the warm metal. One gave ranking, station, and company, the other spelled his name.

“
Hilden Jaron
,” she said aloud as she approached the open dining area of the cafeteria. Her finger pressed against the indentations in the metal, until she was left with a matching set on her finger. She stared at it absently before picking a chair at random to sit on. Although the cafeteria was closed, she knew she could still get something to eat if she asked. But she didn’t have much of an appetite at the moment. She’d only come here because she could tell Jaron needed her to give him a few moments alone with his pain

She reached for her phone, scrolling through the photos until she found the two she and Jaron had just taken. In the first one she was staring down at him sadly, tear tracks obvious on her face. He was smiling a strained, but bright smile. In the second photo she was smiling sadly at the camera, tears glistening in her eyes. His eyes were dulled with a pain he was trying so hard to cover with that same bright smile; his attempt at leaving her with a happy picture of the two of them together, before the end.

Her thoughts jarred, a warning sensation sweeping through her.
Before the end
. She spun on her heel sprinting back to Jaron’s room, suspicions growing with each step. Why had she left him?

Nurses were swarming in and out of Jaron’s room as she approached, a blaring
beep
sound echoing from within. She frantically shoved her way inside, coming to a halt a few feet away from Jaron’s bed. She watched in numb horror as a doctor placed paddles on her brother’s chest causing his emaciated body to lurch upward on the cot with each shock. She stared helplessly, dread clutching her heart in a vice. How did she not see what he was doing? How did she not know?

The doctor finally put the paddles away, giving up. The room spun around Amiel and she closed her eyes so she wouldn’t fall. The doctor’s voice seemed to boom through her mind as he called the time of death. A nurse flicked a switch, silencing the menacing flatline tone. The world suddenly felt terrifyingly silent. She had become so accustomed to the erratic beeping sounds that had matched the rhythm of his once strong heart. Now it was gone. Her brother was gone. She stumbled her way to his bed, gaze locked on Jaron’s vacant eyes as they stared up at the ceiling. A few nurses mumbled their condolences before immediately leaving the room to attend to other patients. He was not the first, nor the last patient to die under their watch. It had become as second nature to them as breathing.

She barely felt the doctor’s hand as he gently rested it on her shoulder, whispering something that was supposed to be comforting.  It only made her feel cold and empty. There would be no more comfort in this world for her now.

“You can stay with him for a while, but don’t touch his skin,” the doctor cautioned as he left the room. Amiel watched in defeat as the remaining nurse carefully wiped away the blood that ran from Jaron’s nose and mouth, down the side of his cheek and neck. The woman closed his eyes gently, positioned his hands across his chest and pulled a blanket up to his neck. Amiel flinched slightly at the snapping sound of latex popping free as the nurse removed her gloves and tossed them in a bin. Her cool hand then grasped Amiel’s shoulder in sympathy, but Amiel was too numb to even acknowledge it. All she could think was
no more Jaron
.

“They tried everything they could. But…the Alphurinise.” It was Cat, the nurse, Amiel distantly realized. “It’s a poison that attacks the muscles in the body, especially the heart, slowly eating it away until there is not enough left to carry on. Jaron held on for a full two weeks. That’s much longer than most. He did it for you, I think.” She sniffled, wiping at her eyes.

Amiel was only partially listening to Cat. She wasn’t sure why the nurse was telling her all the things Amiel already knew. She knew about the effects of the poison and her brother’s strength to live. She already knew, but couldn’t accept the truth before her very eyes.

“He was very proud of you, you know. He used to talk about you, late at night when the pain was really bad and you weren’t there to see him surrender to it. He used to talk about memories of you growing up together, and his hopes for your future. You know, they always discourage us from getting attached to our patients. But Jaron…he was different. He was special. I used to take extra shifts, so I could stay nearby. As silly as it sounds, I thought if anyone could beat this thing, it would be him.” She paused, the hand dropping from her shoulder as Cat walked toward the door. “I’ve never met a finer man.” Her departing words echoed in Amiel’s ears, and finally alone, her world caved in around her.

Crawling up on the bed next to him, she gingerly laid her head on his frail chest, and sobbed silent, body wrenching tears. Internally her mind warred with itself, half yelling at her to stop shaking his body with her sobs, and the other half knowing it no longer mattered. He no longer felt the pain of movement. There was no heartbeat left in the tormented body beneath her head, no more Jaron. Her own heart shuddered in her chest. She ignored it, angry for its beating at all, when his no longer could. Her dear sweet brother was always protecting her, even from his own death. He had sent her to the cafeteria, knowing he was moments away from the end. He had chosen to die a painful death alone, rather than allow her to watch his gruesome final moments. Too bad she had ruined his valiant efforts and returned too soon.

“Amiel! Get away from him this instant!” Her mother’s quiet but harsh command from the doorway registered in Amiel’s mind, but she didn’t so much as blink. Hands grasped her arms in a painful grip, pulling her away from Jaron. Desperation suddenly coursed through her in a bitter torrent. She flung her arm outward, shoving as hard as she could, growling angrily.

“Get away from me!” Amiel shrieked as she thrust her arm out, knocking her mother back. A moment of dim satisfaction flared in Amiel as she watched Malinda stumble backward with a shocked expression on her pristine face.

“Amiel Charlotte Hilden! What has gotten into you? A lady is never distraught enough for such behavior.” Her voice was cold and laced with steel. Anger continued to soak through Amiel’s soul, clouding her vision and perhaps her judgment.

“A human being of
any
worth would be distraught over the death of their loved one!” Her mother flinched slightly, but the expression was gone as swiftly as it had appeared. Glancing behind her to assure they hadn’t gained an audience, Malinda squared her shoulders.

“I assume you are referring to me with that flippant remark. I assure you I am just as upset over the death of my son, as you are of your brother. But I choose to face it with a sense of decorum and mourn him
privately
, rather than with the dramatic flair with which you choose to conduct yourself,” she said scornfully. Throughout the lecture, Malinda remained poised and full of grace, though the heated daggers in her eyes were enough to give away the storm raging within her. Without doubt, Amiel would hear of this later when prying ears and eyes weren’t near. The knowledge of this would have normally been enough to put Amiel in a state of panic, but somehow she felt none of its effect now, the words slipping off her back like water.