Endless (33 page)

‘Where do
you
go?’ Uri replied.

‘I don’t …’ But I stopped. I did go places when I tapped into the ability we called Sight. I moved away from my body and went to the places I needed to.

‘Oh,’ I said.

‘There is one more thing,’ Nox said. ‘When you cross the realms, you’ll need an anchor.’

I thought about the times Uri and Nox had crossed the realms. They had only ever come one at a time, the other always having to stay behind to work as an anchor.

‘How does it work?’

‘It must be someone more than human and near to your body, and one with whom you share significance. Their very existence in your world allows you to be drawn back there when you are ready, though it isn’t pleasant for your chosen anchor,’ Uri said, giving a rare twitch of his nose.

‘Significance?’

Nox turned his back to me and began to walk away down the long corridor. ‘Love, blood,’ he glanced over his shoulder at Uri. ‘Insufferable hate.’

I caught an uptilt at the corners of Uri’s mouth. ‘One that invokes the passions.’

‘Soul?’ I asked.

They didn’t answer.

‘Lincoln?’

Was what we had strong enough?

Still no answer.

‘Would our souls have to be bonded?’
I called out.

To this Nox chuckled and threw a hand over his shoulder as if to say goodbye. ‘Excuses, excuses.’

They were gone.

I bolted upright in the bed.

My wide eyes fell on Lincoln’s. He was standing in the doorway, his expression guarded and intense.

I pushed the hair back from my face. ‘How long have I been asleep?’

And how long have you been standing there watching me?

He swallowed. ‘A few hours. Not long.’

I nodded, still getting my bearings. Lincoln shifted as if he was going to leave.

‘Linc, do you hate me? Do you think I’m weak and cruel to you?’

‘No. Why would you …’ But then his eyes dropped.

‘Did you think I was the only one allowed to struggle with this? Come on.’ I gave him a quirky smile. ‘To be honest, I’m kind of relieved.’

He looked up, caught my expression and raised an eyebrow. ‘Oh, yeah?’

‘Totally. It’s been kind of crushing my self-confidence. You know, me falling all over you all the time, and you seeming to have it all together.’ I was teasing now, kind of.

Lincoln grinned. ‘Well, I guess we’ve solved that problem then.’

‘I believe so.’

He just shook his head as I laughed, but his green eyes said only,
Thank you
, and hazel ones replied only,
Of course
.

CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX

‘I hope you have not been leading a double life, pretending to be wicked and being good all the time.’

Oscar Wilde

A
fter
ordering Lincoln to sleep, I headed out to walk the perimeter just as he had. Everything was silent. When I returned to the cabin I subconsciously reached out to him with my powers and felt his heart beating rhythmically.

Home.

When I found the sandwiches he’d left in the fridge – which he’d obviously turned on – I snorted a laugh but fell on them gratefully then gulped down a glass of milk before heading out to do another patrol, just to be sure. I wasn’t about to let anything slip by on my watch.

While moving through the woods, pushing out my senses to scan the area, I thought more about what Nox and Uri had said. They’d brought Phoenix into this. They did that all the time. And yet I was sure, despite their unhelpful crypticness, that they actually did want Lilith defeated.

So why are they trying to turn me back in Phoenix’s direction? After all he has done. Knowing he can so easily end me?

Maybe because he hasn’t.

When Phoenix
had broken into the Academy and we found him, he’d seemed almost relieved. Like he had been waiting for us. And down in the tunnel – he definitely sensed me and still, he’d fed us the information that helped us save that other child. Not to mention my dreams. Was there another reason, apart from taunting me, that he’d entered my dreamscape?

Yes, he did take the other child away that night in the tunnel, but did he have a choice? With Olivier watching over him, could he have really done anything else at that time that wouldn’t result in the boy being harmed?

The thoughts swirled in my mind but I kept coming back to the same thing – the look in his eyes. He’d looked right at me as he let go of a burst of his own emotion. It had felt so real, so haunting.

He couldn’t have faked that.

He’d come looking for me tomorrow night. He had my mother. He knew I’d do whatever I was asked. Lilith would know that, too. They must be laughing.

If you leave as much as a window open I’ll find you before then.

I stopped dead.

Even the animals rustling in the nearby bushes stilled, the birds’ chirps faded away. I had thought he was winding me up.

I’d been keeping my barriers up so high since arriving in New York, both because of my efforts to grow stronger and also to keep my defences at the ready. Plus, I’d been within Academy walls and their shields almost the entire time. Had Phoenix been trying then, but unable to get to me?

‘Oh,
my God,’ I said to myself, remembering my dreams …
We need to talk.

He had been trying to reach out this whole time and I had only shut him out.

Stupid!

Right there and then – refusing to let another moment go by with all those children locked up and at Lilith’s mercy – I decided to do something I was sure I’d live to regret.

A few hours later, I was running through my workout movements on the patch of grass between the house and the river, when Lincoln emerged and slumped into one of the large rocking chairs, still half-asleep. He was wearing grey cotton sweat pants and a white T-shirt, his hair was all messy and I could tell just by looking he was still bed-warm.

Breathe.

I almost fell over when he leaned back to stretch his arms over the back of the chair, exposing more than a touch of bare skin at his waistband. There was no denying all of our recent time together was affecting me.

Breathe!

I turned my back on him. ‘There’s coffee on the table inside,’ I said, oh-so-casual.

I heard the rocking chair creak, the door swing open and then again when he returned. ‘Thanks,’ he said.

I shrugged, still moving through some strength exercises.

‘Want some company?’ he asked, coming down the stairs.

Well, there’s a loaded question.

I looked
at him quickly, so as not to stare. He looked gorgeous and mostly because he was relaxed instead of tense with overthinking everything. Just him.

We ran through a few drills, mostly just for something to do. Neither one of us suggested we spar. We both knew that wasn’t a great idea right now. Playing with fire and all.

Finally, we settled down on the verandah. As each of us claimed a rocking chair I thought to myself,
This will always be my rocking chair and that one will always be his
. As if we might spend a version of forever here, together.

‘We need to talk about Phoenix,’ I said, killing any kind of peace that had settled. Because despite my earlier thoughts – it didn’t mean we shouldn’t be prepared.

Lincoln’s expression shut down and he took a sip of his freshly made coffee.

Okay, I’ll start.

‘There are kids involved, Linc, and we can’t keep ignoring that the only reason you haven’t returned him is because of me. I saw you fighting him at the Academy. You were merely fending him off.’

Lincoln raised an eyebrow at me.

‘It’s true,’ I said.

He stared into his mug.

‘Look, we don’t even know if returning Phoenix would mean killing me. I could survive …’ I said, even though we both knew that was unlikely. I had no control over my powers when Phoenix chose to reinstate the wounds that Onyx had given me that night at Hades and Lincoln’s healing powers were simply not strong enough on their own.

Lincoln was silent and I thought he wasn’t going to answer so I opened my mouth to start argument number two, but he beat me to it.

‘I can’t
do it,’ he said. ‘I know that you want me to step up to this, but I can’t. I won’t.’

My heart tightened at his words. They were enticingly dangerous. But we were Grigori and that meant other things came before us.

‘Okay,’ I said, the word sticking in my throat. ‘Under one condition.’

‘Which is?’

‘You’ll never put me before an innocent life. If it comes down to a choice, and Phoenix is a danger to others, you need to promise me you won’t hesitate.’ I looked at him, forcing his gaze up until it met mine. ‘Promise.’

His shoulders dropped, deflated as he said, ‘Jesus, Vi. Jesus.’ He sighed. ‘Okay.’

After arguing for over an hour, I managed to talk Lincoln into letting me call Steph on the disposable phone. I didn’t mention I’d already given it a go earlier.

‘One minute and I’ll be timing you,’ he said.

The argument and his bossiness on the subject had put me into a stubborn mood, so I turned my back to him as I dialled. Steph, Salvatore, Dapper and Onyx were still on their crusade and time between talks for Steph and me had been the longest we’d ever gone since first becoming friends. I waited nervously and almost jumped for joy when I heard her answer the phone with a cautious, ‘Hello?’

‘Steph!’ I
yelled in my excitement. ‘It’s me!’

‘Vi!’ she squealed back. ‘Oh my God, we’ve been so worried. Griffin filled us in. Where are you?’

‘I can’t … I have to be really careful what I say in case your phones are being tapped. And I only have a minute to talk before Lincoln hangs up,’ I said.

‘Sounds like trouble in paradise.’

‘How are you guys?’ I asked, quickly, wanting to know as much as possible.

Steph didn’t delay. ‘Okay. Salvatore has been amazing. He barely sleeps, patrolling all the time. But he saved us big-time in Cairo when a couple of exiles spotted Onyx and recognised him. Apparently he’s pissed off people and exiles all around the world.’

‘No big surprise,’ I said. ‘Is he behaving otherwise?’

‘Amazingly, yes. He’s even used a few old connections to get us around and it looks like he found a source for the twelfth earthly ingredient for the Qeres. We go looking for it tomorrow and if we find it, we’ll be heading in your direction by tomorrow night.’

‘That’s great!’

‘I heard about your testing and for the record, Josephine is an evil bitch. When I get there I plan on having ugly words with her and her damn Assembly!’

I swallowed hard at the memory. ‘It’s okay. I don’t care,’ I said, then added quickly, ‘How’s Dapper?’

‘Same as always. He’s led us to all of the other ingredients. He is seriously connected and most people are scared shitless of him as well. They drop to their knees and all but hand over their first-born to him. I’m not sure if they worship him or fear him.’