Everlasting Love (Now & Forever) (5 page)

Emily smiled as she looked around the room
. S
he finally had a place that was just hers, somewhere she could go to get away from it all. She loved it.

“Thank you, Eric. Thank you so much. This is more than I ever hoped for. This is perfect for me. I love you so much, Baby.”

“I love you too, Emily.”

Before heading back to
Syracuse
, Eric was constantly on the phone. Agents were calling him and trying to win his business. On top of that
,
magazines were calling for interviews and Emily was having trouble trying to get Eric to focus on his family.

As they laid in bed the night before he left for school, they embraced each other.

“This is the sucky part
.
I hate leaving you guys and I finally feel like I have a connection with Emma.”

Emily sighed
.
“I know. But it’s almost over, this is our senior year. We did it and just think a year from now, you will be a professional quarterback and we will be married.”

Eric smiled and kissed her
.
“Baby, I can’t wait. I can’t wait for us to buy our first house, to give Emma a huge yard to play in, that’s what I want.”

Emily turned on her side and traced her fingers over his cheek. “I just want us to be a complete family. No more of this going away crap or living with my mom. I want to fall asleep in your arms and wake up in them every morning in our own home.”

“I want that too, Baby. You have no idea how perfect that sounds,” he said as he kissed her. His fingers trailed over her cheek as he deepened the kiss. Her moan encouraged him to continue, so his fingers moved down her
the rest of
body
, lingering on
her smooth skin. “Emily, I love you so much and all I want right now is to feel you against me.”

Emily turned so she could kiss down his chest. “I love you too, Baby,” she said as she removed his pajama bottoms. He smiled at her as he pulled her up into his arms. Emily softly called out for him as her world exploded around her.

“I love you, Emily,” Eric moaned back.

“I love you, too, Eric. Please hurry back home, ok?”

Eric smiled and nodded. “You got it.”

CHAPTER FIVE

Eric’s senior year of football was in full swing. He was the starting quarterback and was having a perfect season. He picked an agent to represent him and teams were scouting him like crazy.

Emily and both of their families managed to make it to a few games but it was too much for a two year old. The girls were circling Eric whenever they could and Emily couldn't bear to watch it. She decided to sit out the rest of the season and concentrate on her studies.

Late one night after Emily finally got Emma to sleep for night and she realized that she couldn't focus on her text books anymore, so she got up and headed towards her art room. She turned her radio on low and reached for Emma's baby monitor. She grabbed her paints and started a new piece. She lost herself in her painting as her mind entered a different dimension where she
was
calm and could leave behind the worries of school and the pressures of having an extremely popular fiancée.

Emily wasn’t sure how much time had passed when she finally put down her brush and realized she was staring at a reflection of herself. She had painted a young woman who looked sad and deeply troubled.

She just stared at the painting. Anyone looking at it would realize that it was Emily and she didn't look happy. The girl staring back at her just looked miserable. Emily knew she had some deeper issues to contend with but she didn’t want to upset Eric right now. She headed back to bed, checking on Emma first. She was sleeping peacefully as Emily leaned over and kissed her forehead.

The next day, Emily returned to her art room and looked at the painting she did the night before. Already knowing the answer, she whispered to herself
.
“Why are you so sad?” She closed her eyes and started to cry as her mother walked in.

“Emily? What’s wrong?” She asked as she rushed to her side.

Emily wiped her eyes and shook her head. “I’m fine.”

“You are not fine. Talk to me, please,” her mother pleaded as she turned toward the painting. “Is that you? Is that why you’re crying?”

Emily sighed
.
“I don’t know. I just started painting late last night and this was the end result. It looks like me, right?”

“Yes, why is she…
why are you, so sad?” She corrected herself mid sentence.

Preferring to distance herself from the truth, Emily replied, “I think she has a lot on her mind. She struggles with life everyday wondering when her family will be complete. She dreams of being happy but doesn’t know how to get there."

“Emily, you may not realize it but your emotions really came across in this painting. I can feel your pain. Why don’t you open up to me? You know all new moms struggle. When I had you, I cried all the time because I couldn’t figure out what made you happy. I felt like a horrible mother and a complete failure. Your father was too busy trying to make partner so I was alone with you a lot and very overwhelmed.”

Emily stood up and looked out the window. “Mom, the big difference for me is that my future husband is three hours away from us, and the center of attention on every football talk show. He did an interview the other day and when he was asked about his personal life - his response was that his focus was on football and the draft. It’s like he’s embarrassed by us and happy to forget his responsibilities here. I have dreams too, Mom.”

“Of course you do, Emily. You need to talk with Eric. He’s still your fiancé
e,
and I’m sure he’s going through a lot right now with all the media hype and the scouting. Plus, I’m sure his father was behind that interview. How many times in two years has he seen Emma?”

Emily nodded and looked back at the painting. “I don’t want to become her, Mom. I want Eric to be here with us, I want him to be a successful professional football player but I also want to be able to paint and sell my art. I keep thinking that you were right when you said that we were too young to put ourselves in this situation. And maybe things would be different if I felt like Eric and I are still in this together, but it’s not like that anymore. He’s there living the dream and I’m here trying to hold it all together. I understand that now, and I love that little girl too much to think about what life would be like without her, but why do I have to do it alone? I’m trying to give her the best of everything but there are some days where I just can’t help feeling sorry for myself,” Emily explained crying.

“Oh Sweetie, of course you do. You lost your college years. You missed everything that you have to hear Sam talk about. I’ve been there, but you have Emma now and I know how much you have sacrificed for her. Your situation would be difficult for anyone, Emily. But I think you are doing the best you can
,
give
n
the circumstances. I’m really proud of you.”

They were quickly interrup
ted when Paul ran into the room.
“Emily, when was the last time you spoke with Eric?”

Emily looked worried
.
“Yesterday morning, I think, why? What’s wrong?”

“Nothing is wrong but breaking news is coming across the sports network right now. They are saying Eric should go first in the draft.”

Emily gasped, “Oh my God. He never said anything. Why wouldn’t he tell me that? It’s huge!” Suddenly the distance she had felt growing between them seemed so real and her confusion was replaced with pain. When did they stop telling each other important things
like this
?

Emily’s mom looked at her
.
“Maybe he didn’t know when he talked to you. Why don’t you try to call him and I will go check on Emma.”

Emily left the room and headed downstairs. They were doing a feature on him as she passed the television. He looked so handsome in the pictures they were using to show his career. He had a wonderful senior season, losi
ng only two games
including a highly televised bowl game that the team lost in the final seconds. 

Emily called his cell and was almost surprised when she heard his voice. “Hey Sweetie, what’s up?”

“Hey back, how’s my soon to be number one draft pick?” She said trying to sound playful and cover up the uncertainty in her voice.

He laughed, “You heard, huh?”

“Yeah, Paul just told me. Why didn’t you say anything?”

“I wasn’t sure it was going to happen. There are so many rumors flying around that I didn’t want to get anyone’s hopes up.”

“Eric, you used to share everything with me.”

“Wait, are you mad at me?”

“I don’t know
.
I just feel like I could be losing you.” Emily was about to continue when she heard a girl’s laugh in the background. “Is someone there with you?”

“Yeah, sorry. A few of us are celebrating the news.”

“Yeah, OK. I see.”

“
Please don’t be like that Emily,
” Eric said pleading.

“Nope, save it. I’m going to go take care of our daughter. Remember her? We can talk later when you’re done celebrating with whoever is so important that you couldn’t be bothered to share y
our big news with us first. Bye,
” Emily snapped angrily as she hung up.

She turned around to find her mom standing right behind her holding Emma. “Emily, if you don’t share with him how you are really feeling, he will never know. You owe him that.”

Emily grabbed Emma and gave her a hug and kiss. “Now was not the time for that. He was celebrating with other people in the room so it isn’t like he was really going to focus on what I was saying. Besides, I have class in an hour
. C
an you babysit tonight? I think I need to clear my head at Sam’s.”

Her mom nodded as she left the room.

***********************

Over the next few weeks Emily was able to clear her mind even though she and Eric had barely spoken since the draft rumors played out on national television. In a way, the painting allowed her to release her anxiety about the problems between her and Eric. Knowing they were real was much easier to accept than feeling confused about where they stood and why she was so sad.

Emily and Emma spent all their time together. Emma sat on the floor and played with her blocks and toys as Emily studied for all her classes.

“Emma, I wish you could have a grown up conversation with
Mommy
, I need someone to talk to.” 

Just then her cell phone rang
.
“Hello?”

“Hey, it’s Sam.”

“Hey, what’s going on?”

“Have you talked to Eric lately?”

“No. I’ve tried his cell phone, no answer. I gave up trying after awhile. If he doesn’t want to talk to his daughter or me, that’s fine.”

“Emily, stop it. Obviously something is going on with him.”

“Sam, he has a two year old daughter here who hasn’t heard his voice in weeks. I understand that football is important but he promised me that he wouldn’t forget about his responsibilities at home. She is constantly asking where her
Daddy
is, I can’t take it anymore.”

“Well, I talked to Rob last night, apparently Eric has been mobbed everywhere on campus. He said everyone was throwing him parties
. He i
s actually worried about him.”

Emily sighed. “Maybe I should talk to his mom
.
I don’t think she would enjoy hearing this, but obviously I’m not getting through to him so maybe she can.”

“Do what you have to do. I’m heading to
Syracuse
on Saturday, if you want to go? Your mom would probably babysit the little munchkin, right?”

Emily smiled at the term of endearment. She knew how much Sam loved Emma. “I’m sure she would, but I don’t know. I’m so depressed about this whole thing and what it’s doing to Emma.”

“Emily, you need to talk to him.”

“I know, let me call you back.” Emily hung up the phone and picked up Emma.

“
Mommy
, was that
Daddy
?”

Emily frowned at her
.
“No
S
weetheart, it wasn’t him. Oh Emma, you are growing up so fast and your
Daddy
is missing out on everything. Maybe he needs a wakeup call, huh?”

Emily got Emma dressed and wheeled her in her stroller over to Eric’s parent’s house and rung the bell.

“Oh Emily and my darling Emma, what a great surprise,” his mom said as she opened the door.

“Hey, Mrs. Mason, we wanted to come over and visit with you.” Emily’s tone
suggesting
that there was more to the last minute visit.