Every Love Story Is a Ghost Story: A Life of David Foster Wallace (56 page)

227    “weird warm full,” from Lipsky,
Although of Course
, at 283.

227    “lumber salesm[e]n and Xerox,” from a letter to Alice Turner, December 11, 1995.

227    “The Icky Brothers,” from a letter to a friend, December 28, 1997.

227    “horses in the yard,” from a letter to Don DeLillo, March 16, 1996.

227    “Mostly I try to remember,” from a letter to David Markson, June 24, 1996.

227, 228    “spasms-trips” and “the lump,” from a letter to Michael Pietsch, April 10, 1996.

228    “make extra room,” from a letter to Don DeLillo, June 25, 1997.

228    “basically an enormous,” from an appearance on
The Charlie Rose Show
, March 27, 1997.

228    “passionate and deeply serious,” from Brigitte Frase, “A Writer Flails His Way Toward Honesty,”
San Francisco Chronicle
, March 9, 1997.

228    “eager to notate,” from James Wood, review of “A Supposedly Fun Thing I’ll Never Do Again,”
Newsday
, 1989.

229    “reveals Mr. Wallace,” from Laura Miller, “A Supposedly Fun Thing I’ll Never Do Again,”
New York Times
, March 16, 1997.

229    “Here’s why I’m embarrassed,” from an interview with Charlie Rose, March 27, 1997.

230    “I mean, can you see,” from a letter to a friend, June 27, 1998.

230    “blissfully ignorant of,” from a letter to Alice Turner, December 11, 1995.

231    “I find myself,” from an interview with Charlie Rose, March 27, 1997.

232    “literally crazy,” from a letter to a friend, December 28, 1997.

232    “fetish for conquering,” from a letter to Michael Pietsch, February 19, 1995.

232    “I’ve wanted a black room,” from a letter to Brad Morrow, November 24, 1996.

233    “Real isn’t how,” from Margery Williams,
The Velveteen Rabbit
(Doubleday, 1958) at 5.

233    “serial high-romance,” from a letter to Rich C., August 24, 2000.

233    “and come close,” from a letter to a friend, December 28, 1997.

234    “tuggy stuff” and “the people selling,” from a letter to a friend, December 3, 1997.

234    “This living hand,” from “This living hand, now warm and capable,” John Keats,
Selected Poems
(Penguin Classics, 2007) at 237.

235    “writing is going,” from a letter to Don DeLillo, September 7, 1996.

235    “weird little 1-pagers,” from a letter to Brad Morrow, November 11, 1996.

235    “the spiritual emptiness,” from the Stein interview.

235    “jejune,” from a letter to Don DeLillo, September 10, 1995.

236    “The novel is a fucking killer,” quoted in a letter to Don DeLillo, September 19, 1995.

236    “Maybe what I want,” from a letter to Don DeLillo, October 10, 1995.

236    “All right, your first book,” from a letter by Don DeLillo, November 6, 1995.

237    “I’m gearing up,” from a note to Steven Moore, January 13, 1997.

238    “A weird lightning-bolt,” from a letter to Don DeLillo, September 11, 1996.

238    “which means I can take,” from a letter to Steven Moore, October 8, 1996.

238    “basically to have projected,” from a letter to Don DeLillo, May 20, 1997.

239    “nothing if not,” from a letter to Rich C., August 24, 2000.

239    “the blow-jobs the culture gives,” from a letter to David Markson, June 24, 1996.

239    “I am getting some writing,” from a letter to Steven Moore, September 16, 1997.

240    “the version of myself,” “a mask,” “obliterated or something,” “slightest mistake or
miscue,” and “the date of the erection/unveiling,” from a letter to a friend, December 3, 1997.

240    “I think I’m very honest,” from a letter to Elizabeth Wurtzel, April 1, 1995.

242    “15 minutes are over,” from a letter to Steven Moore, October 8, 1996.

243    “paw at the reader’s ear,” from a letter to Don DeLillo, January 19, 1997.

244    “It makes me,” from a letter to Alex Pugsley, May 15, 1998.

244    “Writing about real-life,” from a letter to a friend, January 17, 1998.

245    “three days in Bosch’s hell-panel,” from a postcard to Don DeLillo, January 30, 1998.

245    “I don’t think,” from a postcard to Jonathan Franzen, January 10, 1998.

245    “particularly dark,” from a letter to Michael Pietsch, August 17, 1998.

245    “late 90s notoriety,” from a letter to Bonnie Nadell, August 29, 1998.

246    “Do I,” from a letter to Bonnie Nadell, August 29, 1998.

247    “a parody (a feminist parody),” from a note to Andrew Parker, April 20, 1998.

247    “I see that Hal,” from a letter by Michael Pietsch, February 6, 1997.

248    “I feel pretty good,” from a letter to Michael Pietsch, August 17, 1998.

248    “not about the thing,” from a letter to a friend, February 22, 1998.

249    “post-partum funk,” from a letter to a friend, October 25, 1998.

249    “I’ve been going,” from a letter to Brad Morrow, April 4, 1998.

249    “We snorkeled,” from a postcard to Jonathan Franzen, November 4, 1998.

250    “Issues of usage,” from a letter to Don DeLillo, November 25, 1998.

250    “It is a sad Christmas,” from a card to Don DeLillo, December 1998.

251    “I always get the giggles,” from a letter to Rich C., August 24, 2000.

251    “I too have used,” from a note to Lee Freeman, Fall 1998.

252    “She was a girl,” from J. D. Salinger, “A Perfect Day for Bananafish,” in
Nine Stories
(Little, Brown, 1953) at 3.

253    “a collection of,” from “Overlooked,”
Salon
, April 12, 1999.

253    “mean to just about,” from an interview with Michael Silverblatt on KCRW, August 12, 1999.

253    “The big Attention eyeball,” from a letter to Brad Morrow, April 4, 1998.

253    “I’m in the midst of,” from a letter to Steven Moore, June 4, 1999.

253    “The Statue Talks!” from a letter to a friend, December 28, 1997.

253    “just want[ed] to,” from the Arden interview.

253    “I wanted to do,” from an interview with Michael Silverblatt on KCRW, August 12, 1999.

254    “full-scale harassment,” from Benjamin Weissman, “A Sleek and Brilliant Monster,”
LA Weekly
, April 28, 1999.

254    “seemingly inexhaustible bag,” from Andrei Cordescu, “Literary Cure,”
Chicago Tribune
, May 23, 1999.

254    “another mad scientist,” from Adam Goodheart, “Please Phrase Your Answer in the Form of a Question,”
New York Times
, June 20, 1999.

254    “No doubt these,” from Michiko Kakutani, “Calling Them Misogynists Would Be Too Kind,”
New York Times
, June 1, 1999.

254    “The NY Times just,” from a letter to Steven Moore, June 4, 1999.

255    “meta-ironic” and “Does Wallace’s work,” from A. O. Scott, “The Panic of Influence,”
New York Review of Books
, February 20, 2000.

255    “The difference,” from Seth Stevenson, “David Foster Wallace’s Hideous Men,”
Slate
, June 3, 1999.

257    “We fill pre-existing forms,” from Frank Bidart, “Borges and I,” in
Desire: Poems
(FSG, 1999) at 9.

257    “weird cultish Sikh,” from a letter to Rich C., August 24, 2000.

258    “a long march,” from a letter to Don DeLillo, November 3, 1999.

258    “visually raw,” from a letter to Don DeLillo, March 21, 2000.

258–59    “Almost everything I,” from a letter to Jonathan Franzen, circa summer 2000.

259    “I’m scared I can’t,” from a letter to Rich C., September 19, 2000.

260    “the brief weird excitement,” from the optional foreword to “Up Simba,” in
Consider the Lobster
(Little, Brown: 2005) at 159.

260    “three months that tickled” and “I do not know,” from a letter to Don DeLillo, March 21, 2000.

261    “I know [enough],” from a letter to Jesse Cohen, June 29, 2000.

261    “on the side” and “Did you know,” from a fax to Jesse Cohen, August 4, 2000.

261    “Cantor and the sheer,” from a fax by Jesse Cohen, August 7, 2000.

262    “Most of my own,” from a letter to David Markson, November 3, 2000.

262    “did a pretty good,” from a letter to Don DeLillo, April 26, 2001.

262    “Highlights” and “gearing up for” from a postcard to Don DeLillo, August 20, 2001.

263, 264    “It’s been a couple,” “two periods,” and “I apologize in advance,” from a letter to Michael Pietsch, October 13, 2001.

264    “There’s the whole,” from an interview with Laura Miller, in
Salon.com
, March 9, 1996.

264, 265    “A genre is hardening” and “vitality at all costs,” from James Wood, “Human, All Too Inhuman,”
The New Republic
, August 30, 2001.

265    “the traditional galleys-and-proofs,” from a letter to Don DeLillo, April 28, 2000.

265    “I struggle a great deal,” from a letter to Rich C., August 24, 2000.

267    “The students actually,” from a letter to Dale Peterson, March 2, 2001.

267    “home,” from a letter to Brad Morrow, April 31, 2001.

268    “What kind of zip code,” from a letter to Don DeLillo, July 3, 2002.

268    “yellow snow,” from a letter to Brad Morrow, March 21, 2003.

269    “closest thing to a child,” from a letter to Brad Morrow, December 1, 2002.

270    “much less touristy or vulgar” and “pretty much hopelessly in love,” from a letter to Brad Morrow, January 6, 2003.

270    “land of 1600 SAT scores,” from a letter to Brad Morrow, April 30, 2001.

270    “We’re hiring you,” from Paul Brownfield,
Literary Star Out of Limelight, Los Angeles Times,
April 27, 2003.

270    “I have a lottery-prize-type gig,” from an interview with Dave Eggers,
The Believer
, November 2003.

272    “own eccentric researching,” from an email to Bonnie Nadell, April 4, 2003.

272    “enormous, pungent and extremely well-marketed,” from “Consider the Lobster,”
Gourmet
, August 2004.

273    “My audit group’s,” from
The Pale King
(New York: Little, Brown, 2011) at 387.

273    “I…did not think,” from a letter to Don DeLillo, circa November 2002.

274    “I’m doing a book about math!” from a postcard to Steven Moore, January 13, 2002.

274    “wretched math book,” from a postcard to Don DeLillo, July 3, 2002.

274    “both the math-editor,” from a postcard to Don DeLillo, September 1, 2002.

274    “The galleys for,” from a postcard to Don DeLillo, June 4, 2003.

276    “refreshingly conversational style,” from John Allen Paulos, “Electrified Paté,”
American Scholar
, Winter 2004.

276    “One wonders exactly whom,” from David Papineau, “Room for One More,”
New York Times
, November 16, 2003.

276    “mathematicians will view it,” from Rudy Rucker, “Infinite Confusion,”
Science
, January 16, 2004.

276    “Dr. Ragde,” from a letter to Jesse Cohen, circa early 2004.

276    “the best of the stuff,” from a letter to Michael Pietsch, October 13, 2001.

277    “unhappy, complicated, intellectualizing men,” from a letter by Michael Pietsch, November 28, 2001.

277    “I don’t feel much like an editor here,” from a letter by Michael Pietsch, October 3, 2003.

279    “only the tiniest tasting,” from Michiko Kakutani, “Life Distilled from Details, Infinite and Infinitesimal,”
New York Times
, June 1, 2004.

280    “forest-killing manuscript,” from Steve E. Alford, “Wordy Wallace Has New Stories,”
Houston Chronicle
, June 13, 2004.

280    “Wallace has the right,” Wyatt Mason, “Don’t like it? You don’t have to play,”
London Review of Books
, November 18, 2004.

281    “Karen is rehabbing,” and “It’s a dark time,” from an email to Jonathan Franzen, July 16, 2005.

282    “No more nymphs,” from a postcard to Steven Moore, February 2, 2002.

282    “I hear Kath[y],” from an email to Jonathan Franzen, February 11, 2004.

282    “I am more and more,” from an email to Jonathan Franzen, February 18, 2004.

283    “shitty motel,” from a letter to Don DeLillo, January 26, 2005.

283-84    “It’s just this” and “Basically—I empathize,” from a letter to Weston Cutter, un dated.

284    “I’m poised, ready,” from Brownfield, “Literary Star, Out of the Limelight.”

285    “You’re special,” from a letter to Evan Wright, October 17, 1999.

286    “I allow myself,” from a letter to Erica Neely, July 3, 2001.

288    “David Foster Wallace’s 1996 opus,” from Chad Harbach, “David Foster Wallace!,”
n+1
, Issue 1, July 2004.

289    “I’m in awe,” from an email to Jonathan Franzen, November 18, 2005.

289    “I too have,” from an email to Jonathan Franzen, January 3, 2006.

289    “DeLillo’s thing about,” from an email to Jonathan Franzen, January 29, 2006.

289    “I go back and forth,” from an email to Jonathan Franzen, June 6, 2007.

290    “It’s…part-Rottweiler,” from an email to Jonathan Franzen, September 26, 2006.

291    “It’s absolutely wonderful,” from a letter by Christopher Hamacher, March 7, 2006.

291    “Is it OK,” from a letter to Christopher Hamacher, February 22, 2006

291    “You’re not going,” from a letter by Christopher Hamacher, July 8, 2006.

291    “I find that although,” from a letter by Stephen Lacy to Wallace, September 5, 2005.

292    “Tax law is,” from an email to Jonathan Franzen, April 22, 2007.

293    “Work is like,” from an email to Jonathan Franzen, December 1, 2006.

292    “My own terror,” from an email to Deborah Treisman, January 12, 2007.

294    “revelations revelationize,” from a letter to Gerry Howard, January 16, 1986.

295    “Digital=abstract=sterile,” from a postcard to Don DeLillo, dated July 21, 2000.

295    “The individual parts,” from an email to Bonnie Nadell, April 23, 2007.

295    “I am, at present,” from the Eggers interview.

296    “forgetting about writing,” from an email to Jonathan Franzen, April 16, 2007.

296    “What are envied,” from an unpublished interview with Didier Jacob.
Le Nouvel Observateur,
August 2005 (unpublished).

296    “to put some kind,” from an email to Bonnie Nadell, April 20, 2007.

296    “I could take a couple of years,” from an email to Bonnie Nadell, April 20, 2007.

297    “Let me noodle hard,” from an email to Bonnie Nadell, April 23, 2007.

297    “I feel a bit ‘peculiar’,” from an email to Jonathan Franzen, August 4, 2007.

297    “disabling nausea/fatigue,” from an email to Jonathan Franzen, September 20, 2007.

298    “Upside: I’ve lost,” from an email to Bonnie Nadell, December 4, 2007.

298    “I got really,” from a letter to Tom Bissell, February 16, 2008.

299    “We’ll have big fun” and “I am not all right,” quoted in David Lipsky, “The Lost Years and Last Days of David Foster Wallace,”
Rolling Stone,
October 30, 2008.