Everything Changes (43 page)

Addy
was
there beside me, as was Justin who was now Parker’s mechanic and holding the
pit board for him. They both smiled knowing damn well why I puked over the side
of the tough blocks beside me.

When I looked up Justin was giving Parker the one
to go sign, to which Parker barely lifted his head, intent on the lapped riders
in front of him.

Justin smiled, rubbing my back when he noticed
me. “Tell him you’re pregnant when he wins.” He nodded to the finish where
Parker was taking the checkered flag, one hand on the bars, the other fist
pumping the air. My husband had won the biggest race of the
Supercross/Motocross season, The Monster Energy Cup.

As he did his parade lap, the stadium blasted
Nelly’s
#1
through the venue. Parker scrubbed the top of the first jump,
a maneuver where he would come up to the jump full speed, whip the bike
sideways, and then jump over it about a foot from the ground horizontally. It
was my favorite style of jump because it took so much skill to be able to
perfect it.

The next jump he soared through the air and then
stopped at the top of the next one and gave the fans a wave. Having heard the
music playing, he raised his hands and bobbed his head to the beat sending them
into a frenzy. Pumping his fists in the air, the crowd reached deafening levels
as they saw what I saw, a man living his dream.

When he came back around, I was there waiting for
my boy.

I turned to him, my secret smile at bay as I
gripped the front of his jersey. His goggles around his neck got in the way but
I managed to get my lips near his ear. “Nice race, Daddy.”

Once I pulled away, his eyes burned into mine.

He chuckled and nipped at my neck playfully,
causing my skin to pebble and my eyes to roll back. It took some effort to
recover considering the circumstances. “I fucking knew you were pregnant.”

“Yeah?” I couldn’t help but laugh that the
reporter was trying to get their interview but Parker wanted nothing to do with
it. His eyes locked with mine. “How?”

He eyed my chest and then winked. “Your boobs are
huge, Ro.”

“Nice, Parker.” I shook my head as a low giggle
escaped me at the look of excitement on his face.

Justin chose that moment to show up and pat his
brother on his back eying my chest too. “He’s right. Your boobs are huge.”
Justin gave a head nod to the podium. “It’s you, man. Get up there!”

Parker laughed, rolling his eyes, before and
going about his podium finish celebration. I watched as he leaned forward and
started the bike, he revved it a few times as a cloud of racing fuel engulfed
me. Even with my heightened sense of smell, it was still a smell I loved and he
knew it.

On the podium, he motioned for me to come up
after they handed him his trophy so I did. Commotion was all around us,
cheering and champagne spraying. Parker was covered in sweat and beer. It was
the life I knew and loved because now I was finally his completely.

“Shit,” he hummed against my neck when he made it
off the stage before we got back to the KTM tent, “I can’t wait to get you back
to the hotel.”

“Why?” I knew why, I was teasing him.

“Ro,” He was becoming impatient. “I
really
want to get you back to that
hotel now. Let’s go. Your boobs are huge and Justin tells me pregnant sex is
really good. I need to see what this fuss is about.”

He was such a boy.

I wasn’t sure how everything had turned out so
good, but I was happy with the changes heading our way. I found myself with
Parker in ways I never thought I could. He showed me that I could still be my
own person, the girl I wanted to be, and have the boy. It may have taken me a
lot longer than I would have wanted, but I did it my own way, the hard way, but
still my own way.

This was one parade lap I wanted to savor every
detail of. I felt happy tears as I watched my boy that night. He was my past,
my change, and my future. And I wouldn’t have it any other way.

CHAPTER
31

Parker
O’Neil

Checkered Flag

The checkered flag is the flag
waved by the track official to signify the end of the race.

May 1,
2006

When Justin told me what it was like becoming a
dad, I wasn’t exactly prepared given the lifestyle I had. When Ro went into
labor, I was heading into the final round of the Supercross season sitting in
second place. Dusty had a comfortable lead over me in the championship battle,
and it wasn’t looking like I would have a back to back championship this year.
But I felt good because I was back racing. For two years I wondered if I could
get back here. No I was and my wife was having a baby, two to be exact.

Not
exactly what we expected, but when they arrived and we knew everything about
our lives was about to change again, we were okay with it.

The
panic seemed to overwhelm Ro, especially when it came to naming them, so I had
to step in. “How about we name that one Jensen and that one Gracie?”

Ro
laughed but the look on her face was one I was beginning to know well. “Uh,
that’s the boy…I think.” She pulled back the thick white blanket covering the
smaller of the two babies, checked the diaper, and nodded. “Boy.”

“Okay...”
my lips brushed hers “...well then this one is Gracie and that one is Jensen.”

“Jensen
for the boy and Gracie for the girl?”

“Yeah.”
I nodded, looking at them all wrapped all snugly with their mops of chocolate
hair and pink skin.

“We’re
gonna have to mark them…this is going to be confusing,” Ro said, running her
fingers over Gracie’s cheek. Gracie squirmed slightly before falling back
asleep.

“You’re
tellin
’ me.” I laughed watching my son next to my
daughter in my wife’s arms. “I can’t believe we have two kids now.”

“Well
it’s more than we planned but at least Bryce and Sophie have someone to play
with,” Ro said, referring to my brother’s kids who were two and five now. They
were the only grandkids before these two, and now our family changed again.

Justin
and
Addy
came inside the room to see the new
additions. Her parents came and Jack and Michelle were there too…everyone was
there…for us.

It had
taken me a long time to get over why I had let my relationship with Ro go the
way it did and even longer to accept that I could have her in the ways I
wanted. It didn’t take me long to make her my wife once we were finally
together. I asked her on her twenty-second birthday, a birthday I was finally
around for. We got married two weeks later.

Ro
lifted Gracie up and handed her to her mom who then asked the nurse for a
Sharpie.

“No,”
Ro said, immediately looking to the nurse with wide eyes. “Do not give her a
Sharpie.”

I gave
her a funny look but when the nurse handed her mom the marker and Sarah placed
a dot on Gracie’s head, I knew why.

We both
laughed when Sarah held Gracie closely, eying her mark. “Now I can tell them
apart.” Rick laughed, tucking Sarah and his granddaughter under his arm. “Don’t
worry. I’m sure it will wash off.”

“It’s
no big deal,” I assured them. It wasn’t like Ro was upset about it. She knew
her mom.

I would
love to say that Sarah’s memory had improved but sadly she was a little worse
these days. But she was happy and that’s all that mattered to us.

Justin,
with Sophie sleeping in his arms, moved from the wall and
patted my shoulder. “You ready for the last race this weekend?”

“Yeah,”
I smiled, knowing it would be nice to at least have the two week break with my
family after this weekend and before the Motocross season began.

And
then Justin gave me the advice I needed. “You’re going to be a great dad.”

Justin
and I had both struggled with family life for a long time, but we had support
from Jack and Michelle. They gave us the unconditional love our parents never
provided. From that we learned to be what we were: a loving supportive family.

I would
love to say it was easy, but it wasn’t. Look at what that did to Rowan and I?
We were a family now.

Just
thinking about leaving gave me a bit of anxiety, and it felt weird to think
that I even had a family, and I no longer had to call and wait for her to come
to me for a familiar face in a lifestyle of change. Now she was here with me
every step of the way. Being together now was our priority. Ro traveled with
me, and we learned to appreciate any change that came our way. I knew with the
babies it wouldn’t be as easy, but I also knew that I had given us a financial
backing that meant I didn’t have to race. I raced because I wanted to.

To me
the ending of this with us was beautiful. Everyone’s life was a series of
events. Every step, every breath, every choice, and every word leads you to
another moment in your life that will change you.

For me
the best change was Rowan.

While
our life and situation was far from perfect, we saved each other time and time
again. Sure we had to work a little harder at times because of a grueling race
schedule, but we still had a mundane life with laundry, feeding babies,
changing diapers, grocery shopping, and hanging out with our friends and
family. There were the times when I was on my bike in a stadium filled with
screaming fans, polished bikes, and pinned dirt bikes that I realized there was
nothing I wanted to change about our situation now.

Everything
changes in life, all the time too, but then there are the times when they
change for the better.
 

With
time you get older and wiser and it comes easier to you.

Change
isn’t always bad. Sometimes it’s good. It’s like track conditions changing for
the better and you finally get the jump you need, and right when you get the
lead, the very next lap is the checkered flag. You’re relieved because deep down
you know just one more lap and the rider behind you would have gotten around
you.

“Everything
has a way of changing, doesn’t it?” I asked cupping her cheek.

Ro
nodded, leaning into my kiss, our little changes wrapped around us in bed.
“I’ll never let you forget it either.”

CHAPTER
32

Parker O’Neil

Grab
Holes

These
are holes found under the seat which freestyle riders use to hold onto the bike
when doing certain tricks.

April 2, 2009

“Daddy?”

A little finger was poking my
shoulder as I heard a whisper in my ear.

“Daddy?”

I groaned, rolling to the side
and feeling for Ro, who had thankfully put a shirt on. Granted it was my shirt
after our early morning encounters. I checked myself to make sure I had my
underwear back on, knowing I didn’t want to explain what it was that we were
doing to Jensen again. He was a very curious little boy and asked way too many
questions that I had no answers for.

“
Dadddddy
.”
The little voice was growing impatient as I tried to wake up.

When I finally opened my eyes
to see a mess of chocolate waves and a pair of bright blue eyes that matched my
own, he was smiling at me with his helmet in hand.

“Jensen…it’s
too early,” I grumbled, seeing light just barely peeking through the curtains.

“But, Daddy,
you say we ride today before you leave.” He pouted, pushing out his bottom lip,
and I tried to remember when I had made that promise to my three-year-old son.
I had so much to do today before I left for Huston tomorrow for round twelve of
the Supercross season.

It didn’t
matter though. My kids had me wrapped around their fingers as did my wife. They
were what I liked to call my grab holes because whenever I needed them there,
midair, they were always there.

As I stared at
him and tried to wake up, I couldn’t believe how much he looked like Justin. If
it wasn’t for the eyes and Rowan’s cheeks, I would have thought I was looking
at Bryce or even my dad.

“Daddy,
please,” he begged and then yawned.

“I’ll make you
a deal. Let’s sleep for a little while longer. Then I’ll take you out on a ride,”
I mumbled, already putting my head back on the pillow praying he would agree.

He huffed, but
agreed. I reached my arm out to lift him into our king size bed, and he
snuggled between us. It wasn’t long and Gracie was there too.

Ro groaned as
Gracie climbed over her and dug her cold toes into her legs. She rolled to face
me and the kids, her hair still wild and cheeks flushed from earlier.

I gave her a
grin and knew damn well she wanted to punch me for letting them in bed this
early. We usually didn’t allow them in our bed, only because she was afraid
they would make a habit of sleeping with us.

Just as we
were about to settle back to sleep, my phone started ringing.

Ro grumbled,
her eyes still closed as she reached over to her night stand and flung my cell
phone at me.