Evil (20 page)

A clothed foot stepped beside me, and my aunt’s silver cloak bunched to the ground when she knelt at my head. Her hand came to rest on my cheek. “You should rest, child. You have gone through much.” She straightened, and I heard her say further, “As has he.”

We were both lifted in the air. Kellan was asleep, but his hand fell out, reaching for me. I put my hand in his, and then we were both being carried through the air to the house and to my bed. Kellan was placed next to me and his arm reached out to curl around me, pulling me close. He tucked his chin on my shoulder and twisted a leg around mine before he fell into a deep sleep.

I looked up at my aunt who had followed behind to perch on the edge of the bed at my head. She smiled in the moonlight now and combed my hair back behind my ear. “You are very beautiful. Just like her.”

An image of my mother flashed through me. Pain followed quickly behind.

She added, “My name is Aumae, and I am honored to meet you, Shay. To meet both of you.”

My eyelids fluttered closed, the exhaustion was too much, but I wondered whom she meant—the messenger and me or Kellan and me? Then I fell asleep, and nothing mattered.

When I woke, it was night again, and I sat up.

“How are you?” Kellan asked, perched on a windowsill. It gave him a mysterious, feline, and lethal look at the same time. Then he blinked, and all mystery was gone, rising in a fluid motion.

My heart skipped a beat, but I answered, breathless, “I’m fine. You?”

He cracked a grin. “Shay, don’t lie to me. How are you? How is she?”

Then it all flooded me again, the sensory overload, the pool, the kiss, and then his demon… “What did you do to me?”

“Nothing.” He stood before me as I still sat in bed. Neither of us moved, but we breathed as one. The air felt heavy, too heavy.

One breath. Two breaths. I asked, holding mine, “Was that you or was that…”

His eyes held mine, shining with a fierce emotion. “What do you think?”

I already knew—his demon had gone inside of me, but why? What did he do? What did he want? “Did he hurt me?”

Kellan snorted. “He helped you. Are you serious?”

“But—” Why would a demon help me? Help a hybrid?

“I’m a hybrid,” Kellan bit out, in front of me in a flash. He braced both arms on either side of me on the bed and bent forward until his nose was an inch from mine. As his eyes bore into mine, he repeated slowly, with deadly promise, “I am a hybrid, too. I am human, and I am a demon. You’re not just a hybrid, Shay. And by the way, she’s merged with you. My demon helped you with that because you were freaking out, so much that you fought against accepting her. You should be thanking him, thanking me. Not wondering why we would want to help you.”

Jerking away from me, he turned, but I heard him mutter, “She doesn’t trust me.”

“I never trusted you.”

He looked back, and I waited for a few moments until he said in a low voice, “You did, in some small part. Part of you hated me, part of you distrusted me, but a part of you loves me. The part that loves me, and even more now, trusts me completely. And a part of you can’t handle that. Can you?”

He was right, on all accounts. “I do love you. You’re right, but I know that your demon did something to me. I don’t know what he did. It can’t be good, Kellan! I’m half-messenger. You’re half-demon. It can’t be good.”

He took two steps toward me, then stopped abruptly. One hand flexed into a fist, but he forced it to relax against his thigh. “He didn’t harm you. I wouldn’t let him.
I
wouldn’t harm you. Leave it at that.”

I was speechless for a moment, staring wide-eyed at him until he turned away. As he did, the tension broke between us. A soft knock sounded on the door, and Aumae glided inside, a cup in her hand. She smiled, tucking a strand of her hair behind one ear as the rest gathered on her other shoulder, hanging low in a loose braid. Her robe touched my arm when she bent and placed the cup beside me on a nightstand. She turned and glanced between Kellan and me, then her smile beamed more. “I’ve brought her a cup of tea. It’s very healing, especially with her changes. It will soothe her. That’s what she needs right now.”

Kellan jerked his head to the side and left. A burst of wind rushed at me from his sudden departure, and I closed my eyes, breathing in his smell for a moment. When I opened them again as his scent had already faded, I saw my aunt watching me with concern. She sat next to me on the edge of the bed and laid a hand on my cheek. “He only means the best for you. I can see that in him. It’s so strong that there’s a different aura around him. I’ve never met a demon like him. It’s very…rare.”

“She’s holding back. There’s more she wants to say…”
a voice whispered to me. I jerked when I heard it, but I calmed, knowing it was the messenger in me—or it was just me now.

I should’ve asked what else she wanted to say, what she wasn’t saying, but I didn’t. I didn’t want to hear any more new information, revelations that I couldn’t handle so I lay back down. My aunt brushed back some hair from my forehead. It was a loving touch, one that I hadn’t felt in so long, if ever.

Both of us sat there in silence, and then after a while Aumae pressed a soft kiss to my forehead. “You radiate now. She’s merged with you, and you both look so beautiful. You look just like your mother now. It’s painful to see it, but also a blessing. I miss her so.”

“Where is she?” I sat up against the headboard, scooting back with my knees raised to my chest and the cup of tea in my hand.

She sat back and looked away, smiling from fond memories. “It’s painful at times to think of it, but your mother passed away. It’s been six years now.”

“What happened?”

“No one knows. She’d gone upstairs one night, and I found her the next morning. She passed away in her bed. She’d been missing you. She felt something happened to you, but we couldn’t find you.”

“She felt me?”

“You were linked together because you came from her; your Nephilim was constantly trying to find hers. At first, it was so strong, but when you were little, your connection was almost lost. It dropped overnight.”

I whispered, “When I was little?”

“You must’ve been six or so, just a little girl.” Aumae bent her head, and her shoulders shook slightly.

I heard tears in her voice, and my own throat closed up. “What do you mean you couldn’t find me before? You think my surrogate mother hid me or something? Like, kidnapped me?”

“We don’t think so. We know so. You were put in her so she could birth you, but we were supposed to keep in contact with her. Of course, you were supposed to come back to us, but as soon as you were in her, they disappeared. It was like they fell off the face of the Earth. We couldn’t do anything to find you, and we tried. We tried with our messenger side, using magic. We tried asking for help, even your father couldn’t find you. They took you away, and it wasn’t until Kellan contacted me a month ago that I knew you were alive. Your mother kept saying you were, that she felt little twinges from you every now and then, but I stopped believing her. I always thought she died from a broken heart, from missing you so much.”

Kellan had contacted—I knew he had. Of course, he had since we’d found my aunt, but it hadn’t really clicked with me before now. Kellan knew. How long had he known? Had he known this whole time that I’d been taken away from my real parents? What else did he know about me? He’d known who I was this entire time, that we were soulmates, but he’d kept it a secret from me. What else was he keeping from me?

Anger started to boil inside of me. How dare he keep my mother away from me. Did he know about her? He must’ve. He knew so much, too much.

“Shay, calm down.”

I broke out of my thoughts and realized the bed had started to rise in the air, shaking from my anger. Immediately, I set it back down and stopped the trembling. My body stopped shaking, too.

“You’re starting to control yourself better.” My aunt held a hand against my cheek, brushing her thumb under my eyelid gently. “That’s good. That means you’re growing into yourself again.”

“Kellan said we can be strong now. What did he mean by that?” I was hesitant to ask her, but he’d brought us to her for a reason. A part of me knew that I was supposed to find answers that he couldn’t tell me, but there was so much I didn’t know what to ask or who I should ask. I was still afraid to trust anyone.

“I can’t really answer that. I just know that he wanted me to meet you. He wanted you to meet me, and you’re already going strong. You’ve merged with your messenger side. You’re so much stronger than you know, but I can see it in you. So can he. That demon of yours is one very smart, very powerful demon. He knows what he’s doing and if I didn’t see how much he loves you, I would fight him myself for you. I would take you away from here, away from the mess you’re in, but I trust him. I trust that he knows what he’s doing. You’re linked to him. Anyone can see how powerful your connection is. You two need each other.”

“Can a demon be good?”

“Before I met Kellan, I would’ve said no. But even as I say that, there’s darkness in him, too. Complete darkness that only the most evil have in them. Your demon is more demon than you know, less human than you think.”

I frowned, wondering what she meant by that, but then my aunt stood again. With a final squeeze to my hand and another soft kiss on my forehead, she went to the door. “I have to leave for some things. I will be back soon, in a few days.”

“Where are you going?” My heart picked up a beat, feeling panic. Was she coming back?

“Just to get some items that will help you guys. I promise. I’ll be back in no time. You won’t even miss me.” Then she shut the door quietly, and I was left sitting in bed, wondering why I felt a part of myself had just left me. Was my connection to her so strong already that I needed her with me? Was I comfortable with that connection, the feeling of needing her so much? I sighed, finishing my tea. A part of me didn’t want to need anyone, miss anyone, even love anyone. It’d always been me against the world, and I didn’t altogether enjoy that I was starting to lose that feeling. It usually meant that something awful was going to happen.

I’d been home alone for twenty-four hours when Kellan finally showed. He found me in the kitchen, making some food and brewing coffee. My head was bent over the stove, thinking when his voice broke my concentration. “Your powers have increased.”

“What?” I looked up with my hands braced on the counter. He looked so good…too good. I swallowed tightly and kept myself from throwing my body against him, hugging him or doing something worse.

He grinned crookedly, a small smirk, and placed three paper bags on the table. He nodded toward the stove. “You’re not using your hands when you stir that thing. And you’re putting stuff away without even looking. You’re starting to control your power. That’s good.”

Shocked, I looked around and then realized I had been putting away pans, condiments, anything that I’d taken out. I’d been doing it in the back of my mind, without even thinking about it.

“You’re doing it naturally now. You don’t even have to think about it, and it’s already done. You’re becoming a force.”

“What do you mean?” What
did
he mean? It was only flour and a few mixing bowls.

“Nothing, just that it’s natural to you now. You’ve become stronger since she’s merged with you. You look at me differently, too. Did you notice that?”

“I do? How did I look at you before? How do I now?”

“You haven’t always trusted me, but you’ve softened to me a bit, since finding out we’re soulmates. Now distrust is there again, but it’s more. There’s a part of you that won’t ever trust me, not fully. I think it’s from her. She’ll never trust me.”

He spoke so candidly, as if we were discussing the weather. I hated that. I hated how casual this seemed to him and I turned, hissing, “How dare you talk like that—as if it’s okay that I don’t trust you. I should trust you. It should bother you that I don’t trust you—” My words were cut off as Kellan lunged at me, growling. He pinned my arms against the counter behind me, pushing his body against mine, his eyes peering down into mine.

He wanted to dominate me, and a part of me wanted him to. I bit back what I’d been about to spew at him when I saw the fury in his eyes, brimming just under the surface. Then he leaned closer, nipping at my lips with his. I gasped, arching against him and felt him between my legs.