Exposed: A British Bad Boy Romance (26 page)

Chapter 21

SARAH

“O
kay, so tell me everything that happened,” Janine said excitedly the next morning. They’d already been open for an hour, but Sarah got the impression Janine had been bursting at the seams to ask for a while now.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Sarah replied coolly. She didn’t want to acknowledge her brief moment of weakness with Sloan. Multiple moments. She couldn’t tell Janine how the memory of his touch made her body tremble. The thought of his kiss made her anxious for another taste. She couldn’t tell Janine about how she fantasized about him stripping her bare and worshipping her body.

“Oh,
come on
. I’m
old
, honey, not
dead
,” Janine teased, “I could cut the tension in this place with a knife and slather my toast with it. What happened?”

Sarah shrugged.

“No idea what you’re talking about.”

“You two went on a date yesterday—”

“How’d you know —”

“Nevermind how I know. You went out with him and now you’re pretending he doesn’t exist. I know you feel him watching you, sweetheart, I’m surprised you haven’t caught on fire with the heat in his eyes.”

Sarah was tempted to look over her shoulder then. She had felt his eyes on her. She thought it was just in her head.

So what if he was looking at her? She still couldn’t trust him – or herself – with her uncontrollable magic pulling the strings.

Janine was too observant. The middle-aged woman spent her free time reading trashy romance novels with Fabio covers – of course she expected something to happen between them. Never mind that something
did
happen. It was in the past and it couldn’t happen again.

              The library’s doors opened and Sarah got a whiff of lilacs before a pretty blond woman approached the desk.

              “Hi!” She said brightly, a big smile stretching her face. “You must be Sarah, I’m Ashley.”

              For a moment, Sarah was confused. Was she supposed to know this stranger? She cast a worried look in Janine’s direction, but Janine wasn’t forthcoming with any help after being denied the latest gossip.

              Then she noticed the delicate chain around Ashley’s neck, and the pendant resting just above her generous bosom: she was Coven.

              “Do you think we could have a little chat?” Ashley asked casually, but Sarah read more into it. Now witches from the Coven were visiting her at work? What was the world coming to?

              Not wanting to anger an undoubtedly powerful witch, she nodded and excused herself. Janine shrugged an acknowledgement.

              “What’s this about?” Sarah asked, her voice hushed as they reached the far end of the library. This spot was always secluded and quiet. Two of Sarah’s favorite things.

              Ashley’s smile wavered a bit, “The Coven is… concerned.”

              Sarah frowned. Of course they were. She’d never fully tamed her magic and they’d shunned her for it. “I can assure you I’m of no concern to the Coven. How did you even know about...”

              Ashley frowned, “You’re worked up enough that we can feel it three counties away. Half the Coven have headaches from all of this magic constipation.” She shook her head, “I think you’re missing the point. Have you heard of Guardians?”

              There was that word again. Why did people keep tossing it around? Did they just like to highlight how woefully inept she was?

              “Yes, but I don’t see what that has to —”

              Ashley twirled her finger above her head and… nothing happened. She frowned and stared at the ceiling perplexed.

              “That settles it then.”

              “That settles what?” Sarah asked, growing more perturbed by the second. Ashley didn’t make any sense — even by witch standards.

              “Do you have any control over your magic?” she asked.

              Sarah blushed. That subtle question translated to ‘do you get laid on a regular basis?’

              A potted plant toppled to the floor before she could answer.

              “No,” she said with a sigh, moving to right the plant, “it’s always been crazy. I don’t want to make it worse.”

              “But you see,” Ashley said, her patience seemingly endless, “you’re the Guardian. Your magic is going to keep rebelling until you accept your rightful position as the master of these ley lines. Aaaaaaand,” she paused for dramatic effect, “until you do, no other witch is going to be able to use this magic. That may be why everyone’s stores are so low come to think of it…” Ashley tapped her chin thoughtfully, ignoring Sarah’s baffled expression.

              “You don’t need to worry about all of that though, that’s Coven business,” she said with a wave of her hand. “What you need to focus on is taming that magic!”

              Sarah swallowed. Surely she wasn’t saying what Sarah thought she was saying…

              “Is there any other way to…” she frowned meaningfully.

              Ashley gave her a small smile and patted the back of her hand in an affectionate way. Like an older sister giving advice, even though Sarah was pretty sure Ashley was younger than her. Age was no replacement for experience.

              “You should do
whatever
is necessary to hone your powers. The rebellion is only going to grow stronger until you tame it into submission or it consumes you. Being a Guardian is no joke.”

              Sarah wanted to protest that she’d never asked for any of this. She didn’t ask to be a Guardian. She didn’t ask to be a witch. And she certainly didn’t ask for a sexy Director that could change into a tiger at will.

              It always seemed to come back to Sloan. She remembered the feel of his hard muscles beneath the thin cotton of his t-shirt. The rough crush of his lips as he claimed her mouth. Would he claim her body with the same ferocity?

              Would she let him?

              Could she?

Chapter 22

SLOAN

S
loan’s cell phone vibrated for what seemed to be the hundredth time that day. He didn’t even spare a glance for it. It was Randal. He’d been blowing up Sloan’s cell all day. And he was going to let the phone keep on ringing.

He still hadn’t heard from the Elder. Randal wasn’t a big concern to him. Sarah was the bigger concern. Fixing things with Sarah had become his top priority. Randal could kiss his ass.

Perhaps the dramatic shift in his loyalties should have worried him. Even Sloan had trouble believing that his feelings for Sarah could be so strong. So much stronger than his loyalty to the clan. It went against everything in his shifter nature. Or did it? Forsaking all else for a mate seemed completely in line with his shifter nature.

He wouldn’t — couldn’t — let the clan destroy another person he cared about. Loved. Not this time. Not again.

Drumming his fingers against the desk, Sloan tried to figure out how he could remedy things with Sarah. It would have to be some grand gesture. Something to show her how sincere he was.

With an idea forming, he called Janine into his office to enlist her help.              

A few hours later, Janine clapped Sarah on the shoulder.

“Well, I’m off to lunch with that no-good husband of mine,” she said with a little smirk.

“Why don’t you just take the rest of the day off?” Sloan remarked from the office doorway with a conspiratorial smirk.

Sarah reeled to face him, daggers shooting from her eyes.

He leaned against the door jamb casually, thumbs hooked into his pockets, and a lazy grin that made Janine stifle a giggle. Sarah’s eyes widened as she realized that they’d planned this.

“Well, I sure do appreciate it. You two have fun!” Janine called over her shoulder as she nearly sprinted out of the library.

Sloan noticed Sarah clench her jaw and braced himself for another outburst from her.

“Sarah, may I see you in my office, please?” Sloan asked, his tone masking any hidden intentions.

She sighed, suspicion plastered on her expression.

Could he do this? He wasn’t one for admitting he was wrong. If she could let him say his piece, maybe he could get through it.

He wanted to pull her into his arms. Kiss her. Touch her. Make her moan. He felt Sarah’s magic prickling in the air, bringing his tiger to the forefront, making him hard and ready for her even as his nerves threatened to get the best of him.

              Maybe Sarah had a little cat in her, because her curiosity got the better of her and she stood, following him into the office.

Sloan closed the door behind her and suddenly she filled his senses. Citrus and sex all wrapped up in that librarian uniform that made his hands itch to strip her bare.

“Sarah, I wanted to apologize to you,” he said, his voice soft and unsure. Sloan didn’t like this. He was used to being in command of the situation. She fiddled with her bracelet, avoiding eye contact.

“I wasn’t forthcoming with you. I should have been honest about my interests from the beginning and I shouldn’t have excluded you. I know how precious this place is to you.” He had more to say. So much more. If only she would look at him. Say something.
Anything.

Sarah took a deep breath.

“I’m afraid…” she paused, seeing the pain reflected in his eyes. Was she afraid of his tiger? His heart clenched painfully. The tiger was as much a part of him as his heart or lungs. If she couldn’t accept it… He swallowed the lump in his throat, trying to focus on her voice again.

“I’m
worried
,” she amended, “that I may look the other way because my magic wills it. My magic wants to fuck you and,” she tried to push back the rush of heat that rose in her cheeks at the crass words.

“And I don’t know what’s real and what isn’t. I don’t know if you’re using my magic to cloud my judgment. I don’t know if this is going to destroy the thing I love more than anything in the world. I don’t know if I can trust you even though I want to. But is that really me? Or is it my magic? When my powers can fabricate my emotions and you can exploit them… how can I trust my own instincts? … Or my desires?” Tears pricked the corners of her eyes and Sloan resisted the urge to wipe them away and pull her into a comforting embrace. She seemed to have her own planned speech to get through.

Sloan let his arguments drop and he nodded without a word, bolstered slightly by her expectant look. Did she want him to say something in return? He didn’t want to say the wrong thing, so he said nothing at all.

He crossed the room, desperate to put his hands on her, but remembered what she said, shoving his hands in his pockets, hoping he could stop himself from exploring her body. He didn’t want to cloud her judgement. Didn’t want her to think he was trying to manipulate her magic.

His hands balled into fists in his pocket. Afraid to touch her, afraid to speak, afraid that the slightest movement would send her scampering off like a frightened doe.

“It doesn’t only affect you, Sarah,” he whispered finally.

Her eyes flicked up to meet his, confused but with a glimmer of hope. His tiger swelled with pride at that glimmer, eager to claim its mate. He still had to tread carefully.

“The potent combination of your magic and my… abilities affects me, too. Shifters are very sexual by nature… put us together and you have a powder keg. But it isn’t only your powers, Sarah. It’s
you
. I’ve thought of you non-stop since I first saw you in that coffee shop,” his hands left his pockets now and grazed her hips. She didn’t pull away. Didn’t protest. His tiger roared with approval.

“I’ve thought of peeling off your clothing, layer by layer. Exploring your flesh. Bending you over this desk. Fucking you in the stacks. Watching you squirm as you cry out my name even as your inner librarian shushes you. I’ve not been able to
stop
thinking about it, Sarah. You drive me insane in the very best way.”

Sarah was speechless. Her mouth fell open, but she remained silent.

His hopefulness faded as he accepted Sarah’s rejection. He’d thought that laying himself bare would reassure her.

“I’m sorry,” he said, letting his hands fall from her body with a sigh.

He felt Sarah’s absence immediately as he walked over to his desk and pulled out a box small enough to fit in the palm of her hand. He wanted her to understand. This intangible pull that kept bringing them together. It didn’t only cloud her judgement. He was ready to betray his entire kind for her. But she couldn’t see that. Neither of them chose this magnetism, but was it bad just because they didn’t choose it?

“Here,” he said, handing the small white box over to her. A silver bow, no larger than her thumbnail graced the top of the box. “I wanted to do this a little differently. Maybe over dinner… candlelight and soft music. I wanted to convince you to give me another chance, but I understand…”

She hesitated to open it, looking from the small box in her hand to the man shuffling uncertainly before her. She lifted the lid and Sloan saw tears spring to her eyes in recognition. Good tears, he hoped.

“I wanted this to go a little differently,” he said, unable to stop himself from repeating the words. “I want you to know I meant what I said. I will never let any harm come to you or the Kerris. I’ll respect your wishes if you don’t feel the same, but… I do think you’re very special, Sarah.”

Her hands trembled as she pulled the diamond-encrusted tiger charm from the box, turning it over in her hand in disbelief.

“This is too much…” she protested, gratitude shimmering in her eyes.

“Nonsense,” Sloan said, helping her attach the charm to her bracelet, it fit in perfectly. “You have room on your wrist for a tiger, but what about your heart?” he asked, his own heart thundering behind his ribcage.

Her eyes stayed glued to the little animal dangling at her wrist for a long moment before her gaze lifted to meet his.

“I’m afraid of my magic…” she said, voice trembling.

“I’ve lost control of it before and I don’t want to hurt someone I really care about.”

Was she admitting to caring about him? Sloan’s lips curved into a wicked grin.

“I can teach you control, Sarah. But first, you have to be willing to lose it.”