Fae (8 page)

Kiernan kicked his leg out and swept Cole’s feet out from under him, he hit the ground hard and Kiernan laid the combat knife against his throat. “I’ll be just fine, Cole.” Removing the knife to the sound of Eryn’s laughter, Kiernan stood up and pulled Cole to standing.

“You didn’t have to make the point so bluntly.” Cole rubbed his back, grimacing, and Kiernan just grinned at him.

Eryn’s eyes grew wild as he lifted the bow to his shoulder, his smile widening to a manic level, “Enough joking boys, let’s hunt.”

Chapter Five

Ráj Manor, Caledon, Ontario

Fae woke the next morning in the warm glow of Eltera’s power. Her body lit up like always, a shimmering golden light that emanated from her skin, and she tried to focus on it and make it last. Just as the power was cresting, the lingering exhaustion inside her fading, Ebere appeared in the entryway to the little nook she occupied. Fae sighed and pushed herself into a sitting position, crossing her legs on her cot.

Each of them had one of these little nooks, barely eight feet by four feet. Enough room for their tiny beds, and a few scavenged items that they claimed as possessions. All Fae had in hers was a white stone with a hole in it that she’d found working in the garden, and a battered copy of
Brave New World
that made its way around the girls at random.

“Morning, Fae…” Ebere whispered and sat down against the doorframe. She was twisting her fingers together, her eyes occasionally flicking to the fading light on Fae’s skin before returning to her nails.

Fae dropped her head back against the wall and blew out a breath, and mumbled, “Morning.”

“Look, I’m really so-”

“No.” Fae cut her apology off instantly, and Ebere slapped the floor beside her.

“Damn you, Fae!” Ebere hissed, trying to stay quiet enough to not wake the other girls, “You should have let me take part of the punishment! It was my choice to help you. I didn’t wake you when I saw you had fallen asleep and -”

Fae started laughing bitterly to herself, shaking her head at Ebere who started stumbling over her words in her anger. Instead of letting the girl continue to founder, Fae started talking. “You really don’t get it, Eb. Butler was
looking
for me. He didn’t accidentally stumble on me in the fucking laundry. He tried to find me upstairs, and when he couldn’t he watched the security footage to see where I went. You were trying so hard to confess, to get him to punish you instead, but he already knew you’d helped me and he didn’t care.”

“But… but
why
? Why come after only you when he knew that I’d helped you? Why not me?” Ebere’s earnest confusion came out in the stress of her voice.

“Because
you
wouldn’t heal by the party tonight.” Fae extended her arm, the fading aura of light still visible even in the dimmed lamps from the main room. “He wanted to hurt someone, and he needed someone that Master wouldn’t be upset about. Lena probably assigned me to the East wing because she knew it was impossible for one person to finish in that time, especially knowing that Master was going to punish me for the breakfast thing once she and Alec reported it.”

“…and when you didn’t finish Butler could do a check and deliver his own punishment.” Ebere sighed and rubbed her hands across her face. “That
bitch
. I – I’m so angry, that’s even more of a reason why I should have taken part of it. They can’t set you up like that, I mean, my God, Fae, you can’t keep that up!”

“I’ve been doing it -”

“For two thousand years. Yeah, I get it.” Ebere threw her hands up. “I get it, okay? You’re the product of some ancient goddess’ messed up plan for peace, and maybe you were originally supposed to protect people – but you have to
stop
, Fae. Stop trying to protect all of us, just stop. Protect yourself for once!”

“I don’t need protecting,
you
do. All of you do.” Fae felt like she was pleading with the girl to come to her senses. “Trust me, I can handle it. I’m fine, okay?”

“No, it’s not okay. You have to stop throwing yourself in the line of fire, because I know it hurts just as much regardless of whether or not you’re
fine
in the morning.” She muttered under her breath and then continued, “I don’t want you to get hurt anymore. Not for me, not for any of us. Promise me you’ll stop. Please, Fae, please promise me you’ll stop.”

She tried to fight back the tears that suddenly burned the corner of her eyes. How long had it been since someone,
anyone
, had actually cared about her? Cared enough to lecture her like she was a child? She was a
hundred
times this girl’s age and Ebere was talking to her like a little sister. It was so unexpected that for once, Fae was at a loss for what to do for a moment. It all made a smile creep across her lips. “I can’t promise I’ll stop, Eb. I’ve spent too many lifetimes using myself as the shield, but I can try.”

“Promise me you’ll try then.” Ebere shifted closer to the bed, moving to her knees so they were almost face to face. Then she reached up and grabbed Fae’s hand in a tight grip and Fae saw the threat of tears in the other girl’s eyes -
that
almost undid her completely. “
Please
, just promise me you’ll try and take care of yourself.”

“Okay. I promise.” The words choked out as Fae fought the emotion down, and Ebere gripped her hand once more before she stood.

“Okay then.” She nodded and stepped towards the door, but then she looked back and said, “I like you, Fae, and I think we could be close. We could be great friends. You could have a lot of friends if you – if you’d just let
someone
in. While you’re trying to take care of yourself, think about that.”

Fae opened her mouth to respond, but Ebere had already slipped back into the main room to wander back to her own nook. The girl’s words were a heavy weight inside her. She’d had friends before, she’d cared about mortals, loved them like family – and then they had died. That was the trouble with mortals, they died.

‘But how’s your life going without any friends?’
Her mind piped up, and Fae cursed herself.

The walls she’d built up around her had kept her numb. Numb to the things they did to her, numb to her past, numb to the suffering of the women and men around her. It had let her survive – but surviving wasn’t
living
.

“Eltera?” Fae whispered into the dark, looking up at the ceiling and trying to focus on the images of the goddess burned into her memory. A few tears slipped out and she pushed them off her cheeks as she steeled herself to pray. “I don’t know what you’d tell me to do. I don’t know if any of what I’ve done has been right, or if you can even see us anymore. I know –” her voice broke as more tears slipped down her cheeks and she brushed them away quickly. Sniffling and clenching her fists in her lap she continued. “I
know
this was not in your plan, and I would never blame you for this curse. I know that this was my fault,
our
fault for failing you in the battle, but I don’t know what to do. I don’t know what to
do
, Eltera, and no matter what I just feel like I’m continuing to fail you. I feel if I were just stronger, if I were just braver, I could handle this with grace. I could bear this burden
and
continue to help others, to protect the weak – but what if I can’t?”

There was a dull ache in the center of her chest as she tried to stop the tears. She was speaking in the old language, and she knew even if one of the girls was listening they wouldn’t understand the words, but the sniffling and the hitch in her voice was obvious to anyone who cared to eavesdrop. Fae knew if she hadn’t cracked open the door on her past the day before that Ebere’s words wouldn’t have hit her so hard. The words wouldn’t have summoned images of her Faeoihn sisters smiling, and laughing, and joking with her about being so damn serious. She wouldn’t be thinking of all the ones she’d helped over the centuries, and she wouldn’t be haunted by the ones she’d lost.

Fae brushed her thumb over the pale blue veins in her wrist. Her skin was once more just skin. No light, no power thrumming inside her – just skin. Her eyes moved back to the ceiling, wondering for the millionth time if Eltera could hear her, “What if – what if I’m doing the wrong thing? Would you give me a sign? Would you tell me to stop? To lay down my arms, stop fighting, and submit? Please,
please Eltera
, just give me a sign?”

She fell silent, and the quiet of the female quarters rolled in to fill the space her prayers had vacated. There was the blurred sound of more than a dozen girls breathing, shifting in their beds, the dull white noise of the heat coming on – and nothing else.

No golden light, no scent of rain or earth, no claps of thunder.

Nothing.

Fae tried to stifle the tears as they overtook her. She felt so alone. She
was
alone, but Ebere was trying to reach out. Others had tried too and she had been kind, but kept them all at a distance. These fragile little mortal lives that would only hurt her in the long run if she cared, but what could they be to her in the mean time if she let them in?

‘Friends’
, Ebere’s words echoed in her mind.

They could be friends, if she would just let them. If she would just let them in, if she’d actually talk to them, give them real answers, maybe her days wouldn’t feel so hollow. As Fae curled back up on her side, she sniffled again and the edge of her mouth ticked up a bit. Yes, Ebere wanted to be her friend, but if she was her friend then there was no way that Fae could do what she’d asked; friends
protected
each other. It didn’t mean Fae couldn’t try and be more careful with herself, but she wouldn’t give up on helping these girls.

As soon as she’d been able to get out of the female quarters she’d found Irena and followed her, because she’d needed to be around the pixie’s bright energy after her heavy morning. Watching Irena and Juliet hanging their decorations and fluffing up their bouquets around the house was an easy distraction. Strands of lights were hung throughout the house, woven together with garlands over doorways and down the stairs. How long it had taken for Irena to do it all, Fae wasn’t sure, but it did look impressive. Juliet’s eyes were fever bright as she kept up with the pixie, a mix of the third dose of Oblivion and her own excitement over the decorations.

“Can you believe how beautiful it all is? It reminds me of Christmas!” Juliet was giggling and excited as Irena swooped down and landed next to her, they hugged each other tightly and bounced up and down laughing.

“It’s perfect! Just how I imagined it!” Irena’s wings were twitching with her infinite supply of energy. “Fae, you love it right? Tell me you love it.”

“I love it.” Fae smiled, glad to see her happy on the day of a dinner party. Maybe Nikola would let her decorate for each of them; that would be a bright spot to look forward to. Irena was still staring at her, impatiently waiting for more comments, and Fae scrambled to fill the void. “Ummm, it’s
gorgeous
, Irena, magical. The white flowers and the evergreens, it really looks like a winter festival. You positively transformed the house.” That seemed to satisfy the pixie who was fluttering about six inches off the floor in her pride.

“Juliet weaved the lights in all of the garlands!” Irena grinned, and Juliet blushed and high fived her.

“It was all your idea, but it was fun.”

Just as they were all giggling, Butler stepped into the foyer from the huge parlor room and closed the double doors behind him. They went silent as he stared at them, and then he tilted his head, “I believe you are all supposed to be getting ready for this evening.”

“Yes, sir,” they all mumbled.

“Then get upstairs and do it,” he growled. Juliet and Irena immediately clasped hands and rushed towards the north stairs to get back to the female quarters. As Fae stepped past Butler he held out his hand to stop her. “I’ve been asked to watch you tonight. I suggest you do nothing foolish, but if you do,” he paused, a smirk lifting the corner of his mouth, “I’ll be there to make sure you regret it.”

“Thanks, Butler,” Fae muttered. She couldn’t feel the punishment from the day before anymore, but she remembered it completely.

“Sir,” he corrected her.

“Thank you… sir,” she muttered, and he nodded. Fae clenched her jaw and walked past him, jogging to catch up with Irena and Juliet. Those two were inseparable and still whispering about their decoration scheme as they topped the stairs. The din of noise coming through the doors to the female quarters was loud, and the guard at the door opened it as they approached.

Then the three of them stepped into chaos.

All of the girls were talking in a hodgepodge of accents in a relatively small space, some were sitting on the floor while others twisted and shaped their hair into various styles that matched them best. Others were applying make-up to each other, or filing their nails, or applying clear polish. Nikola wanted to show off his collection to his guests at the party, and Lena wanted to make sure they were perfect. She was red-faced when she saw the three of them standing awkwardly near the door.

“Irena! Fae! Juliet! You are
late
!” She hurried over and pushed them towards the showers. “Hurry and shower so we can get you ready. You only have an hour. Remember, white dresses, and make sure one of the twins does your make up.” She snapped her fingers and turned back into the room to go yell at someone else, probably about eye liner or lip gloss.

The important things in life
.

The three of them showered fast and when they were drying off, the twins, Sobeska and Zofie, stepped in the doorway with big smiles. They already looked gorgeous with their dark hair falling in waves and their olive skin shimmering under the light thanks to the lavender powder they brushed on. Small crystals had been clamped into their hair and the effect was that they both looked like winter nymphs.