Authors: Janna Shay
Jace wiped her tears and pulled the covers over her when she passed out. From what he could tell, she thought he didn’t want her anymore. What a joke. His mind had remained locked on her day and night. His body constantly yearning for her. Apparently she thought he wanted Arlene. Dani was it for him. But there was something else bothering her. It was obvious she thought she needed to run away from whatever was wrong, and that someone was after her. But who? She was definitely afraid and he intended to find out why.
He figured she’d sleep for a few hours, so he brought some work up to the apartment. Dani was not going to be feeling so great when she woke up and would likely need his help. About six hours later, he heard her moaning and went into the bedroom to help her up. He held her head while she got sick, washed her face with a cold washcloth, gave her two aspirins, then helped back into bed.
“Feeling any better?”
“No. Would you hold me?”
He got into bed with her, then held her until they both fell asleep.
Dani opened her eyes cautiously. She lay quietly, trying to figure out how she ended up in Jace’s bed. What did she do last night? She hadn’t been stupid enough to sleep with him after he’d cheated on her, had she? With the intentions of slipping out of bed unnoticed, Dani sat up and immediately gripped her head, moaning. Damn, her head was going to explode for sure. Lost in her misery, she forgot Jace was in bed, and jumped when he put his hands on her shoulders to steady her. She shook her head in misery as she frantically tried to remember last night.
Upset with herself for finding herself in bed with Jace after he was with Arlene, she spoke harshly. “Don’t touch me, don’t move me, my head is going to explode.”
Jace got up and fixed her a cold compress. He placed it across her forehead, then eased her back on the pillows. “Don’t make any sudden moves.” He gave her some aspirin and ginger ale. “Take these, they’ll help.”
In spite of her discomfort, she needed answers. Making sure to keep her voice whisper soft so the cannons in her head wouldn’t go off, she asked, “Did I do anything I’m going to regret?”
“We’ll talk later. Lay down for a little longer, then I’ll come back and check on you.”
A while later, he checked on her. He sat on the bed next to her. “How are you feeling?”
“Better. What did you do to me last night?”
“Me? What did I do to you? I didn’t do anything but rescue you from yourself. You were drunk by the time I got to you. If you want answers, then maybe you should ask Tom. He’s the one you were with yesterday.”
Some of her memory returned at the mention of Tom. “Tom-yeah, I remember. We were at the bar drinking and he was so nice, trying to help me and all.”
“What the hell were you doing leaving with Tom in the first place, and what does trying to help you and all mean? I thought we were together. Are you just playing me?”
“There has never been anything between Tom and I except friendship, and you know it.” She jumped out of bed with the intention of dressing. “But that’s neither here nor there. I thought we were together, too, but I guess I was mistaken. Since you decided to play the field with Arlene, it’s none of your damn business anymore what I do and with whom. You-don’t–own-me.”
Jace stood up. His face darkened in anger and a vein in his neck started throbbing. “No, I don’t own you, and I don’t want to. I don’t even know why the hell I bother. You apparently don’t give a damn about me. It would serve you right if I left you here to rot.”
A stabbing pain surged through her body. She raised a shield of anger to protect her heart from further damage. “Do yourself and me a favor, and leave me the hell alone. I can’t for the life of me figure out why you’re still nipping at my heels anyway. You got your piece of ass, and it’s apparent you’ve already moved on to greener pastures, so you don’t need to give a damn. But it’s good actually, because I won’t be needing a booty call from you anymore.”
She took a step back at the savage look in his eyes. He seized her arms, crushing his mouth to hers savagely, demanding a response.
When she relaxed against him, returning his passionate kiss, he softened his mouth and licked her dry lips. His gentleness accomplished what his aggression could not. She wrapped her arms around him in complete surrender as passion flooded her senses. Her desire flared quick and red hot. Her hand struck fast, like a viper, unzipping his pants and clamping onto him.
Jace threw her on the bed giving her the wantonness she demanded.
She locked her eyes on his as she kissed his stomach, traveling lower until she found him with her mouth, making him moan as the fire in his blood raged out of control. Jace gripped her shoulders, then yanked her up, taking her mouth hungrily with his. Lifting her body, she shook her hair back, then straddled him. He gazed deep in her eyes as she took him in quickly, wrenching a growl from deep within him.
Jace watched as Dani’s eyes misted when he moved beneath her. Her head fell back as she bowed back, making his heart hammer as he reveled in the feel of her surrounding him.
Jace’s body demanded that he end this torture. He thrust up and gripped her hair as he ground out, “Look at me. I want to see your gorgeous eyes cloud over with desire as I take you, knowing only I can make you feel this way.” Clutching her hips, he increased the pace until her eyes blurred with ecstasy as he brought them both to culmination.
Spent and exhausted from the maelstrom that had churned inside them, Dani fell limply on top of him.
Jace held her gently as he caressed her back. He stopped abruptly when he felt the wetness on his neck. Lifting her so he could inspect her face, he saw the tears falling from her eyes. “Are you so upset with me that making love now makes you cry?”
Not trusting herself to answer, she shook her head and lowered her eyes as she got up.
“Dani, look at me. Is it something I’ve done? I never meant to hurt you. I’m sorry for the things I said in anger.”
Anguish encased her heart as she dressed. “Forget it.”
He reached for her, but she twisted out of reach. “What’s wrong?”
“Leave it be, Jace.”
He stood up and jerkily pulled his pants on. “What is it with you? Do you honestly believe I can let it go?”
She whipped around, her eyes stormy despite the tears still clinging to her lashes. “I slept with you even though you cheated on me. How do you think that makes me feel?”
“I haven’t cheated on you.”
“So you say.” She whirled to leave, her hair slapping his face.
His hands struck out, quickly capturing her shoulders as he spun her around to face him. With turbulent eyes and a frigid voice, he asked, “Do I at least get a chance to defend myself?”
“Do you think it’ll make a difference?”
“So that’s it? You walk out and it’s over? No talking? No attempt to salvage our relationship? Are you going to give up without a fight?”
Bitterness rose, snapping the tight control she had on her rage. Her voice was razor sharp as she countered. “You want a fight? Then I’ll give you a fight. What the hell were you doing with Arlene if we’re supposed to be together?”
“I wasn’t with Arlene. I never touched her.”
“How can you lie to my face? At least have the decency to tell me the truth.”
Jace swept his hand through his hair. “I’m telling you the truth.”
“You wouldn’t know the truth if it slapped you in the face. I saw you with my own eyes.” Dani yanked herself free and marched into the living room.
Fast on her heels, Jace snatched her up and tossed her on the couch. “You’re not going anywhere until we clear this up.”
Alarmed by his manhandling, her arms instinctively rose to protect herself.
His manner suddenly contrite, he lowered her arms. “I’m not going to hurt you. I don’t know why you think I would. I’ve never raised my hand to you and wouldn’t, no matter what the provocation.”
She searched his eyes and saw the truth in them.
She moved to leave but he held her back. “Dani, we have to settle this between us.”
“There’s nothing to settle.”
“I’ll be damned if I’m going to let you walk away without hearing what I have to say.”
She jerked out of his grasp and sat back reluctantly. Irritation leapt into his eyes, but she relished it, as the image of his lips on Arlene’s filled her vision. “Say what you have to say so I can leave.”
Jace stood up and paced in front of her as he rendered his explanation. “I haven’t touched Arlene. I don’t know what you think you saw, but nothing happened.”
Heat rushed through her at his blatant lie. “How can you lie to me? I saw you Jace. I saw you kissing Arlene in the lounge of the casino.”
“I didn’t kiss her. She threw herself at me and kissed me.”
“Oh, and I suppose you having dinner with her the night she arrived was forced on you, too. Do you take me for a complete fool?”
Jake’s hand raked through his hair, a gesture Dani noted he did when upset.
“I took her to dinner to placate her. I know what a bitch she could be when provoked. If she knew we were lovers, she’d go for your jugular.”
Her smile scornful, she retorted, “Then there’s truth in her statement of being your on-again, off-again girlfriend.”
He stopped and gazed at her. “She has never been my girlfriend. We dated, but it didn’t take me long to realize what a shrew she was.”
“It must be nice to have women throwing themselves at you. I hate to disappoint you, but I refuse to be one of the multitude.”
“Now you’re being ridiculous.”
She stood up, her heart shattering, knowing she could never allow a man to use her for his means again. Her eyes stony, her voice steady, she delivered her retort. “I won’t let you use me. It’s over. Spew your lies to Arlene.”
Jace wrenched her body to his. “Don’t do this to us. I love you. Let’s talk this out.”
Pain speared through her heart. She wasn’t free to be loved, because capture was always a heartbeat away. “No, you can’t love me. I won’t let you.”
“Well too fucking bad, Dani, because I do love you, and it’s too late to stop.”
Dani shook her head. “No, I don’t want to hear it.”
He spoke harshly, the hurt behind his voice obvious to her. “I’m not asking for your love in return. I’m only asking you to settle our disagreement.”
Her inclination was to hold him and pretend everything was settled. Prudence demanded she stand her ground. But love or no love, she wouldn’t let herself be manipulated to satisfy his lascivious urges. “I don’t want to talk anymore. You said what you had to say but it’s not enough. It’s over.”
Jace released her. Dani saw the emotional shutters close over his eyes.
“Make sure this is what you want. I won’t sit around waiting for you to change your mind. If you walk out that door, it’s finished.”
Tears streamed down her face as she turned and walked to the door. With her hand on the doorknob, she glanced back at him. “I’m sorry, Jace. More sorry than you’ll ever know,” she said softly, then shut the door behind her.
For the rest of the day, Dani walked around cloaked in misery, her thoughts constantly on Jace. How had things between them gone so far? She’d always been so aware of what was happening around her, she had to be. Yet she never suspected he loved her. The consequences of her past were always there, lurking behind her, waiting for her to slip up. So how had she become so lax in her vigil? Then it hit her. Because she trusted Jace to keep her safe. Subconsciously she knew he wouldn’t let anything happen to her.
But how could he profess his love for her when he had someone else in his life? When you loved someone, didn’t that mean you didn’t want or need anyone else? Apparently that wasn’t the case with him.
Dani knew if she gave in, things would always be the same. If not Arlene, there’d be someone else she’d have to share him with. He was handsome and had a sexuality that drew women to him like bees to pollen. Her heart begged her to take whatever he was willing to give, but her mind refused to accept anything less than everything. Reason told her that if she accepted him on his terms, the day would come when she would hate him. The ache in her heart confirmed what she already knew. Life without him wouldn’t be easy.
“Hey, Julie,” she said, approaching her friend at the cashier’s counter. Haven’t seen you around. How’s everything?”
“Great, but you look like hell. What’s going on?”
Dani leaned on the counter so she could talk quietly. “I need someone to talk to. Are you free anytime soon?”
Julie glanced at the clock. “Hold on, I have a lunch break coming. Let me get someone to cover for me, then we’ll go grab a cup of coffee.”
About twenty minutes later, Dani picked a secluded corner of the café so they could talk in private.
“Okay, spill the beans, what has you so bummed out?”
“Oh, Julie, I’m devastated. Jace and I have been lovers, and things were so great between us, or so I thought. Then I found out he cheated on me. I can’t be with him anymore because I know there’ll always be someone who’ll catch his eye. I can’t be just one of his many women he strings along.”
Julie reached over and touched Dani’s arm. “How do you know he cheated on you? I’ve known him for a long time and never heard of him being a creep. Don’t get me wrong, he’s dated his share of women but, as far as I know, he’s always done right by them.”
“Because I saw him and Arlene kissing in one of the lounges here in the casino.” Dani could feel the sob threatening to escape. She scraped her bottom lip with her teeth to prevent it.
Julie’s brow furrowed. “Are you talking about Arlene, the one who approached my counter the other day?”
Not trusting herself to talk, Dani just nodded.
“Are you sure you saw Jace kissing her? Or could you have seen Arlene kissing Jace and thought it was mutual?”
Dani stared as she tried to replay the scene in her mind. “I think I saw them kissing each other. Jace denied kissing her. He told me Arlene threw herself at him. Why did you ask me if I was sure?”
Julie sat back in her chair before answering. “Because me and anyone who knows Jace is aware of the fact that he avoids Arlene like the plague when she’s around. He dated her once or twice a couple of years ago then dropped her like a hot potato. It’s no secret she chases him like crazy, but he can’t stand her. In fact, his favorite name for her is bitch with a capital B. Jace would never have kissed her. I think what you saw was Arlene throwing herself at Jace.”
Dani’s heart dropped to her stomach as the enormity of what she’d said to Jace hit her. “Oh dear God. What have I done?”
“What exactly did you do?”
Dani pressed her fingers to her eyes to keep back the threatening tears. Her arms dropped to her lap, then she looked her friend in the eyes. “Yesterday I got stinking drunk and ended up at Jace’s place. This morning when I woke up, we had a huge fight over Arlene. Jace tried to tell me he wasn’t fooling around with Arlene, but I wouldn’t listen. I said some horrible things to him.”
She lowered her eyes as she recalled the words she flung at him. Raising them slowly she gazed at Julie as tears trickled down her cheeks. “Jace told me he loved me and asked me not to throw away what was between us, but I refused. I even went so far as to tell him I didn’t want him to love me. Then I told him it was over between us.”
Julie clasped Dani’s hand. “Angry words are always slung back and forth in a fight. I’m sure it can still be fixed. You need to go to him and tell him you’re sorry.”
The sob she was holding in escaped. “It can’t be fixed. Before I left, Jace told me to make sure this is what I wanted because if I walked away, we were finished.”
Julie sat quietly for a few seconds as if to gather her thoughts. “I don’t believe that. If he said he was in love with you, then he wouldn’t be able to turn it off because of a few heated words. You have to try Dani. You aren’t going to let him go without a fight, are you?”
Dani’s eyes shot up and gazed at Julie. “You’re right. What is the worst that can happen? He tells me to take a hike? I’m not going to lose anything more by trying.”
Dani hugged Julie. “Thanks. You’re always there when I need you. I really appreciate it.”
“That’s what friends are for.”
“Can I ask for one favor?”
“Sure ... anything.”
“Can you be there to pick me up when I crash and burn?”
Dani went out of her way to catch Jace alone so she could talk to him, but he wasn’t cooperating. She tried several times to see him in his office, but she was always given the excuse that he was in a meeting or not in. He wasn’t answering his cell phone and never returned her calls. She even tried knocking on his apartment door, but he was either gone or not answering. It was totally hopeless. She’d screwed up, big time, and now was paying the price.
Dani’s feet were killing her, and the muscles in her face were sore from the smile she’d pasted on her face to insure her whales received courteous service, even though they’d been extraordinarily demanding and obnoxious for some reason. She was damn tired of fending off wandering hands and licentious remarks, her nerves were drawn tighter than a bow, and her life was in the dumps. And to top it off, she still hadn’t found an opportunity to talk to Jace. She was probably too late anyway. Hell, even if her past caught up with her and she was put in jail, at least the not knowing when she’d be caught would be over, and she’d be better off than where she was now. She shook her head. Things were so low now. How much worse could they get?
She soon found out with agonizing clarity. While talking to Tom as she was having something to drink, she happened to spy Jace walking through the casino alone. Knowing this would probably be the only chance of finding him alone, she hurried to catch up with him.
“Jace,” she called out, but he kept on walking. “Please, can I talk to you for a second?”
Jace stopped and turned slowly toward her. In a cool voice devoid of emotion, he said, “I’m in a hurry, but if you have a question about work, I can only spare a minute.”
The bottom dropped, and she spiraled down into the depths of desolation. Her eyes burned with tears, but she bit the inside of her mouth to stop them. “I wanted to say how sorry I am for everything, and ...”
Jace interrupted before she could finish. “I don’t have time to talk about personal issues. So if that’s all you needed to say, I have to go.”
Dani raised her arm to stop him, but let it drop when she saw the coldness in his eyes. She swallowed the knot stuck in her throat and raised her chin. “Actually, I wanted to give you notice that I’m quitting at the end of the week. I didn’t mean to bother you.” Not able to stop the tears anymore, she spun and walked quickly away.
Dani’s heart fractured into a million pieces. She hurried to the elevator so no one would see the tears streaming down her face. When she reached the safety of her apartment, she cried until there was nothing left. Chills ran through her body as she recalled the cold indifference in Jace’s eyes. What had she expected? Did she really think he’d forget everything because she was sorry? Maybe it was better this way. He could go on with his life and she could go on with hers.
The time had come to move on. It wasn’t the first city, nor would it be last, that she’d left behind in the last seven years. But it was the first place that had felt like a home since Chicago. What had she been thinking? She knew better than to attach herself to anyone or anything. Those luxuries were not destined for her.
Friday would be her last day. By Saturday morning she’d be gone. If she hadn’t have asked Julie to help her give a birthday party for Jace, she would’ve left tonight. But she loved Julie too much to leave her high and dry. One of the hardest things she’d ever do would be to attend that party, but she owed it to both Jace and Julie.
She carefully put on concealer to cover the signs of her tears, then went down to the casino. It was time to tell her best friend she was leaving.
“Hi, Julie.” Dani couldn’t seem to keep the melancholy from seeping into her voice.
Julie glanced at Dani. “Damn it!” She turned toward the other cashier. “I’m going on a break. I’ll be back.” She wrapped her fingers around Dani’s wrist and hauled her to the coffee shop. “If you tell me you crashed and burned, I swear I’m going to kick Jace’s ass from here to Sunday.”
“No, it’s not his fault. I never told him.”
“Why the hell not?”
Dani placed her elbow on the table then rested her chin on her hand. “I tried to talk to him, but he was never available. When I finally spied him walking through the casino, I stopped him.” She raised her head and gazed at Julie while she swallowed several times to dislodge the lump in her throat. “He was only interested in talking about work. I was too late.”
Julie reached across the table to place her hand over her best friend’s. “I’m sorry. I wish there was something I could do to help you.”
Dani forced her lips to curl up in a half-smile. “You already have. Just being my friend is all the help I could ever hope for.” She reached up and wiped the tears that had trickled out. “If I live to be a hundred, I’ll never forget the frigid coldness I saw in his eyes when he looked at me.”
She gave herself a mental shake and straightened her shoulders. “That’s not what I came to talk about. I wanted to tell you that I quit my job and Friday is my last day. I’ll be here to help you with Jace’s party, then I’m leaving Saturday morning. You’re the best friend I’ve ever had and I don’t want to lose you. I hope we can still keep in touch.”
“You’re not leaving Vegas, are you?”
Dani’s head bobbed up and down. “Yeah, I am. I don’t know where I’m moving to yet, but I’ll let you know as soon as I get there.”
Julie scooted next to Dani. “I’m going to miss you. Is there anything I can do or say to make you change your mind?”
“It’s better this way. Less chance of Jace and I running into each other.”
Julie glanced at the clock on the wall. “Damn, I have to get back. I’ll come by your place after work tonight. Are you going to be home?”
“I’ll be waiting.”
Dani gave Julie a hug before walking away.