Fallen (Beautiful Book 1) (6 page)

The doctor moved onto Logan. She pulled the curtain around him so she could examine him in private. She tried not to look him in the eye, and be as professional as possible.

‘You still haven’t told me about my file,’ he said.

‘I don’t know what you’re talking about.’

For the first time, Faith’s ears perked up. There wasn’t anything better for her to do.

‘I asked you to change some stuff.’

‘And I told you that that could cost me my job.’

‘You don’t get it do you? I could lose everything.’

‘I do, I could too, and I’m not risking it.’

‘Then I’ll have to tell your seniors about your side dealings.’

She did a few more examinations then said, ‘It’s the risk I’ll take.’

He felt defeated, this woman was no push over.

‘In the next few weeks you’ll start more advanced rehabilitation.’

‘I see.’ He gazed ahead bitter.

‘Listen, I’m sorry this happened to you, but I can’t do anything to help you.’

He was silent. The rest of the examination was done in silence and soon she moved onto the next patient. Faith wondered what he’d done, and why he was trying to get a doctor to change his records. She also wondered what he had on the doctor. She lay back and wondered, it took her away from the dreadful life that had befallen her.

The days dragged on and neither of them had said a word to each other, but it felt as though they were getting to know each other more and more, just by the conversations they had with others. Faith had a sense that Logan was a spoilt rich boy, who felt the world owed him. It seemed his father had done a lot of problem solving for him, and she’d yet to see him walk into the hospital.

She’d seen his friends. There had been no girlfriend, no brother or sister. He seemed to live a lonely life; that was her observation anyway. Logan had learnt a bit about Faith too. Listening into conversations, she sounded like an extremely successful woman, who had a stroke of bad luck. He grew fond of knowing who would visit her and what they would talk about, and even though they were complete strangers he felt as though he knew her.

****

‘Daniella, what are you doing here?’ Faith was shocked to see the pretty assistant at her bedside.

‘I had to come and see you.’ She sat down.

‘I didn’t think you’d want that. I wasn’t very nice to you the last time we spoke.’

‘Actually, you were right,’ she said. ‘What you said to me made me think. It was the first time someone looked beyond my looks, and reminded me that I am bright enough to be the best I can.’

‘I’m glad to hear it.’ It felt a little good to hear it, but also sad that she’d lost her looks.

Logan’s ears perked up and he eavesdropped on the conversation.

‘I’m sorry about what happened,’ said Daniella. ‘I realise that it could happen to anyone.’

Faith was silent.

‘It got me a little frightened.’

‘Well, I don’t know what to say. I wish I could tell you not to be afraid, but I can’t. This person ruined my life.’ She felt the tears threaten. ‘I don’t even know how I will start over.’

‘I had to see you.’

‘I’m glad you came. Thank you.’ She sniffed.

‘Things at Hutton aren’t looking good.’

Faith tried to turn to look at her, but it was difficult. She found a comfortable angle just enough to see her.

‘A lot of meetings have been taking place. I’m never invited to any of them, like when you did them.’

‘I see.’

‘I was in the toilet the other day, in the cubicle and I over heard some of the ladies say that we’re about to lose our big contract.’

‘Why wouldn’t Noah tell me this? I’ve heard nothing from my lawyers or anyone. This can’t be right. You know how I feel about rumours.’

‘I know, but I just wanted to give you the heads up.’

‘It’s my company, they can’t run it without my say so.’ She panicked. ‘What the hell is going on?’

‘I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to upset you.’

‘You didn’t. In fact, thank you for letting me know. It seems Noah has different plans for Hutton.’ She sighed. ‘But he really can’t do anything without my say so.’

‘I know, I just thought you should know.’

‘Keep an eye on things. Let me know what happens, and thanks for this.’ Her heart raced. Not only had she lost her physical self, it felt as though her company was being taken away too.

‘How are you doing?’ Faith asked. ‘You getting on all right?’

‘Yes, it’s a bit hard without you there.’

‘I’m sure it was harder with me there.’ She tried to make light of it.

‘No, actually, I liked the push. You are the person I want to be like. No more using my looks.’

‘Well, it hasn’t really worked out for me, has it?’

‘I wouldn’t say that.’ Daniella felt upset that the woman she looked up to had a negative view on things.

‘Listen. I know things can be hard. Look at me. And right now, I’m not in the mood to be upbeat and positive. For the first time in my life I feel defeated.’ She had to admit it. ‘I feel like nothing.’ The emotions raged again. ‘I’m nothing.’

‘That’s not true. You’re Faith Hutton.’

‘Yes, well, I don’t feel like that. But I don’t want my misery to put you down. Live your life.’

Daniella nodded. It was sad to see her once strong, go getting boss turn to a woman who felt sorry for herself. They chatted a while longer, Faith not giving much, but listening instead. Logan had learnt a lot more about her, and each word that came out of her mouth, saddened him every time. He wished he had the guts to say something, but something held him back.

‘Thanks for coming,’ Faith said as Daniella got ready to leave.

‘I’ll come again next week, if that’s okay.’

‘If you feel like it, I’m not the best company though.’

Daniella smiled and left her. It had been hard for both of them. An hour later, an unexpected visitor arrived. The moment she saw him, her heart picked up pace, and her life didn’t feel so bad anymore. Perhaps there was still one thing she had.

‘Jacob, you came.’

‘Hi.’ He sat down nervously beside the bed.

‘I thought you left me, ran away from me.’ She was close to tears again. It was exhausting.

He took in a deep breath. Logan listened in again. It had been interesting the last few days.

‘Jacob, what’s wrong?’ She felt the shift in his demeanour.

‘I don’t know what to say.’

‘Why didn’t you come to see me earlier? I thought you loved me.’

‘It was just hard,’ he said.

‘Then can you imagine how hard it was for me.’

‘I’m sorry.’ He lowered his head feeling a little ashamed.

She was silent, there was a distance between them, she could feel it.

‘Does what happened to me change us?’ She swallowed back hard.

‘I…’ He shut his mouth and looked at her.

‘You what?’

‘This has been hard. I was scared to face you, scared of what I might see or what might happen.’

‘But you came.’

‘I did…to.’ It was hard for him too.

‘To what?’

‘I can’t do this with you. I’m sorry. I know this makes me an a-hole, but I’d be lying if I said I could continue to be us.’

She was silent a moment. She took it all in. Not long ago he’d been all over her, praising her beauty, now he couldn’t do them. And was this the best time for him to break it to her?

‘I’m really sorry Faith. I really am.’

‘What changed? I’m still the same person. It’s still me.’

‘I know, but you won’t be the you I used to know.’

‘You mean I won’t be as beautiful?’ She wanted to scream, she wanted to die!

‘That’s not what I said.’

‘You didn’t have to.’

‘I’m sorry, I have to go.’ He stood up, he couldn’t keep hurting her with his words, and he couldn’t stay with her either. It just wasn’t who he was.

She was silent. She watched him as he hesitated, and then made up his mind to leave. It hit her like a ton of bricks. She was ugly. He’d said it without saying it. She wasn’t good enough for him anymore. She wasn’t up to scratch for him anymore. He could no longer have her on his arm to show her off to his friends, and partners. She wasn’t good enough, she’d been tossed aside like a piece of garbage.

‘Oh god!’ The tears flooded. ‘Oh my god!’ She broke down.

‘Hey.’ Logan couldn’t bear it, he had to do something, he had to speak.

With everything he had, he struggled out of bed, flopped into the wheelchair beside him and tried with all his might to shift towards her.

‘Hey, don’t cry,’ he said softly.

She stopped a moment and gazed at the man she knew had been beside her, but hadn’t met.

‘He’s an ass. He doesn’t deserve you.’

‘How would you know?’

‘Because I’m an ass.’

She laughed gently.

‘Seriously, it’s his loss.’

‘Is it really? He gets to walk away and I’m left here with nothing.’ She cried.

‘Hey.’ He shifted again so he could grab some tissue beside the bed.

He lifted, even though he was in excruciating pain, and dabbed the tissue on her eyes.

‘Don’t cry. He’s not worth a single tear. Save those tears.’

‘Should you even be out of bed?’

‘No, but I couldn’t let that prick make you feel like you’re nothing.’

‘Basically I’m nothing.’

‘That’s not true!’

‘I’ve lost half my face, so the doctors say. It looks like I will lose one of the biggest contracts of my entire life, which could put my business in serious financial trouble. We’ve already done a lot of spending. And now I’ve lost my boyfriend.’

He managed to get back down into the wheel chair unscathed.

‘But you have your mind, your voice, your heart, your life.’

She tried to move so she could study him.

‘You have the things that matter,’ he said. ‘I’m a jerk.’

She laughed.

‘Seriously I am. I’ve lived my life in this bubble. I’ve done things I’m not proud of. I thought the world owed me up until I had the terrible accident and it all came crashing down. I’ve spent the past days deep in thought, and listening to people around me and I’ve realised something.’

‘What’s that?’

‘The things I thought mattered, don’t anymore. The moment I thought I’d die, was when it made sense.’

‘Then why are you trying to bribe the doctor.’

‘Ah, you see. You’re smart.’

She laughed lightly between the tears.

‘There’s still that dark side to me that doesn’t want to face up to what I’ve done.’

‘Then your whole speech is pointless.’

‘No I wouldn’t say that. You seem like a strong woman. You’ve built yourself up from scratch. I also heard that you don’t depend on your looks. Don’t you see, you have that to your advantage. If you didn’t depend on your looks then, what suddenly makes you think you have to depend on them now?’

The man had a point.

‘Will you let that jerk face re-write your beliefs? Will you let the perpetrator make you believe he’s actually destroyed you? The truth of the matter is none of them can take away what they can’t possess. They can’t take away your brilliance. That same mind you had, is still the same. You can still stand right back up again.’

‘What are you, some kind of angel?’

‘No, I’m a jerk trying to make it right. I watched that man walk out of here today and I saw myself. It didn’t look great at all. You don’t see it until you see it.’ It had really hit him. How many hearts had he broken without realising the pain he’d caused?

‘I see.’ She turned away.

He sat with her a while.

‘What’s your name?’ she asked after the silence.

‘Logan Davenport.’

‘Nice to meet you Logan, you look familiar. Have we met before?’

‘I’m not sure, maybe.’

She couldn’t recall where, but she was certain she’d met him. There was still so much trauma in her mind that it had blocked out certain things.

‘I know your name is Faith. I’ve heard your visitors call you that.’

‘Yes, Faith Hutton. Ironic isn’t it.’

‘What is?’

‘My name, Faith. I have little faith right now.’

‘You will.’

‘So what do you do, Logan?’

‘Well I was a stock broker before all this happened.’

‘You’re not any more?’

‘There is a possibility that I’ll lose my licence. I could also go to jail.’

‘Why’s that?’

‘Well, I did something really stupid.’

‘Go on, tell me.’

‘Well. I drove while under the influence of alcohol and drugs.’