Read Falling Behind (Falling Series) Online
Authors: Dee Avila
He swiped his
nose walking toward the bed. “I’m sorry I got so rough. I”—
“Come here, I know you didn’t mean it. I don’t want to go all the way
, but I’m sure we can find something else to do, right?”
His eyes lit up
and his lips stretched into a wide, crooked grin. He squatted down in front of me, sliding his hand up my legs. Looking me in the eyes, he said the three words I was not ready for. “I love you, Reese.”
NO! No, you don’t! You can’t. Can you? I can’t. We haven’t been together very long.
“I, um,”
I don’t want to lose him or hurt his feelings again. Just go with it Reese.
“I love you, too.” I sighed out of defeat.
He kissed me, soft
ly and gently as the butterflies increased, tenfold. I didn’t know how far I would let him go. When he deepened the kiss all coherent thoughts left my mind, I could do this. I was his girlfriend. I just told him I loved him. He knew I didn’t want to go all the way. I trusted him.
Josh took it slow and caressed my body. Playing with my nipples and trailing his hand down my underwear. Touching what no one had ever touched before. I cringed.
He must have noticed because his sweet, raspy voice whispered in my ear. “You said we could do other stuff. I just want to make you feel good.”
He forced a finger in. I was so dry it hurt, moisture flooded my eyes. I turned my head. “You feel so good
, Baby. Can’t I just put it in a little?”
I bit my cheek to keep myself from sobbing. When I didn’t answer he continued
. “If you love me, Reese, you’ll let me be your first. I won’t hurt you, I promise.” I felt the pressure of his hips pushing into me as the weight of his body pressed against me. Tears rolled down my face. This was it. He was taking what was mine to give. He was right. I said I loved him. I am his girlfriend. I owe him this.
“Ah, you’re so tight. I love the way you feel.”
I hate the way you feel inside me. It hurts so badly. When will it be over?
I stayed silent and still, with alligator tears gathering in my ear. I needed this to end. I wanted to go home. Josh grunted a few times and thankfully it was over.
“I’m sorry
, Baby. You just felt so good, I couldn’t keep going.” He turned my face toward him. “Are you hurt?”
I nodded.
The lump in my throat keeping me from talking. He pulled out and the condom was covered in blood. I don’t remember him putting one on, thank God he did. I wasn’t on my period so he had ripped me. I looked away.
“Shit
, Reese, there’s fucking blood everywhere. What the hell?”
After standing and putting my underwear back on, I gathered his duvet and went to rinse it out before putting it in the wash
ing machine. I choked back the tears and cleared my throat. “There, all taken care of. Can you take me home now?”
He wrapped me in a
hug, “I’m sorry I hurt you. I should have been gentler. Next time will be better, Baby. Better for you.”
“Yeah, next time. I really am ready to go home
, now.” I walked toward his front door and I could hear him mumbling to himself. I really didn’t care what he said. I wanted to be home.
I cried in the shower and then continued to cry myself to sleep that night. He took the
only thing that was mine to give. He took my virginity.
“Reese!” Candice yelled from up ahead of me. I swiped away the single tear that slowly escaped down my cheek.
“What?” I picked up my pace and bounced up to my friend.
“Where were you? I’ve been calling your name, forever!” Candice glared at me.
Glancing at my surroundings I realized I made her walk more than half way. I must of really zoned out and slowed way down. “Sorry
, I was thinking.”
“Everything okay?”
She threw her arm around my shoulders. Candice was a few inches taller than me. She had lean, long dancer legs, a tiny waist and huge boobs, which she found annoying and said got in her way. I envied her. I had no shape to me. I was barely five foot two and the only thing I had going for me was a butt and blue eyes.
“Yeah, just thinking about Josh.”
“Wanna talk about it?”
“Nope.”
“Okay, then, we can talk about my problems.” I laughed. True Candice. If there was nothing major to discuss, she was going to talk about herself and what she thought were issues.
“Jonathan asked me out,
again.
” She paused, letting that one sink in. Candice had been dating Alex for over four months. I’m pretty sure this was a record. She’d been with Alex for longer than she’d been with all her other boyfriends, combined I didn’t understand it, she liked dating. A lot. But not just one guy—especially for this long.
“So
, why haven’t you gone out with him, then?” I looked over at her as we headed up her driveway. Candice stayed unusually quiet.
“Why haven’t you broken up with Alex
, yet?” I opened the front door and headed into the kitchen. Mrs. Warner, who always wanted me to call her Cecilia, was in there loading the dishwasher.
“Hi Reese
, Honey, are you hungry?” She gave me a quick hug and stepped over to the refrigerator. “I put dinner away, but I can pull it out. I’m sure it’s still warm.”
“Thank you
, Cecilia, but I’m fine.” She looked me over. “I promise, I ate with my parents before I came over.”
“Alright
. Well, if you get hungry or thirsty, you know where everything is.”
I smiled at the woman I considered my second
Mom. “Thank you.”
Candice
grabbed a couple sodas and led me back to her bedroom. I threw my bag on the floor and hung up the garment bag with my uniform in it. Flopping down on my back on Candice’s bed I watched her sit down cross legged.
Candice sighed
. “I started my sophomore year with a boyfriend and now I can’t drop that reputation of being taken.”
“Candice, you are still taken.”
I fought the urge to look at her pointedly and dramatically roll my eyes.
“I know
, I just wish I could take some of those juniors and seniors up on their offers. Like Jonathan. Again, today, he caught up to me and asked if I was single yet, and ready to go out with him. You don’t know how bad I wanted to say yes.”
“Then why don’t you?
C, I don’t get it. You’ve never gone out with someone this long. If you loved him I could understand it. But you don’t.”
“It’s not that simple
,” Candice said.
I’d seen the fading bruises on her wrist. I’d noticed the way she flinched when he’d reach for her. It worried me. “Candice
, does he hurt you?” I asked staring at her wrists.
She shook her
head. “It’s okay. Really, it’s no big deal.” She jumped up, grabbing the now empty soda cans. “You done with this?”
“Yeah.”
When she walked back into her room, she was still quiet. Nothing else was said about Alex.
She crawled into bed and I wrapped my arms around her. “I’m here, you know
. You can always tell me the truth.”
“Please
, Reese, just drop it.” She bit out. Something was going on.
The next morning I got up early and beat Candice to the shower. Before I could start dwelling on Josh, I thought about Candice and Alex. I heard he used. I didn’t want to believe my friend would date a drug user. She was smarter than that. She had to have known. It was all anyone talked about. Who was using what and who was doing whom. I was glad my relationship never hit the gossip lines.
Not yet anyway.
“Hurry up in there! I have a big game to get ready for.”
I laughed. “We’re not playing in the big game, Candice.”
She giggled. “No
, you’re right, but we do have to look good cheering on our boys.”
I finished shaving my legs and underarms. Turning
off the water, I noticed a towel fly over the shower curtain. I quickly grabbed it before it got wet. “Thanks, C.”
I toweled off
and slipped in to my uniform as Candice got into the shower. When I walked back into the bathroom, the mirror was steamed over. Shaking my head I held the blow dryer close to the mirror to clear a section. It didn’t stay clear very long.
“You almost done?
I can’t see the mirror.”
“Yeah.”
I started
drying my hair. When Candice stepped out of the shower I caught her reflection in the foggy mirror. I spun around. “Candice.”
“Please don’t, Reese.” She pulled her towel tighter.
“I already see the bruises on your wrist, but this is major.” I swallowed back the knot in my throat.
“And when you asked about my wrists
, what did I tell you?” She spun around glaring at me. Before I could say anything she continued. “It’s none of your damn business. I’m handling it.”
I lifted my eyebrows, “Yeah, looks like your handling it. You need to break-up with Alex.” After mentioning
the bruises I noticed on her wrists a month ago, I hadn’t seen any others until last night. I thought she handled it. Now, I know she hadn’t.
“I’m going to get dressed in my room.” She walked out clutching the towel to her chest.
I stared in the mirror wondering when our friendship had become so strained. Titus, Candice and I use to be so close; before Candice and I got boyfriends and Titus became so busy with football. My phone beeped, signaling a message. It was from my boyfriend.
Josh: Be there to pick you up in fifteen
Me: Make it twenty
I was nowhere near ready. I put gel in my hair and flipped my head over to
finish blowing it dry. I pulled it up in a high pony for game day. As I started to put on my make-up Candice came back in dressed in her uniform with a warm-up jacket.
Smiling, she grabbed her make-up bag out of my hand. I usually only wore mascara, unless it was game day and Candice insisted on doing more. “Sit down
.” she pointed to the toilet. “We both know you won’t put enough on.”
I sat waiting to see if she would say anything or continue to act like nothing happen
ed. Closing my eyes, I let her put on my game-day face. A few minutes later, after swiping a soft brush of color across my eyelids, she finally spoke.
“Look, I know you’re worried about me. These bruises on my back were an accident. The other night when I mentioned breaking things off he tried to grab ahold of me and when I stepped back I fell over
a stack of books on his floor. When I tripped, I fell into his dresser. It wasn’t a big deal. Really”
“
Really, Candice? You expect me to believe that?” I opened my eyes and saw the hardened look on her face.
Guess she did. Wow!
“That’s what happened. Please drop it.” She dug in her bag and handed me a tube of lipstick. “Here
, put this on.”
I grabbed it and went back over to the mirror. “I will. But either you need to tell someone or I will.” I applied the nude colored lipstick and topped it off with strawberry lip gloss.
“There’s nothing to tell.”
I turned on her. It wasn’t often I stood up to her
, but I wasn’t going to back down this time. “Candice, there is something to tell. I don’t know if he’s using like everyone says and that’s why he does this or if it’s something else. Either way, you need out. You obviously can’t do it on your own. Talk to someone. Or I will.” I looked her in the eyes, she nodded. “I’ll give you two weeks, C.”
“Two weeks.”
Chapter Three
Titus
It was game day. Metallica blared through my iPod’s Jawbone speakers while I smashed around my room, getting ready. Rummaging through my drawers, I searched for a t-shirt. Normally I would have grabbed my go-to Metallica, but it was still soaking in some concoction my mom promised would save it from the mud stains.
Glancing at my closet
, I saw the bright blue one. It wasn’t my favorite, but it came in second. This year, on my birthday, I got my license and went to pick Reese and Candice up. When Reese got in, she threw a bag on my lap. In it, was the bright blue shirt with “Watch Out I’m On The Road”, written across the chest.
I pulled the shirt over my head before stepping into my jeans. I had about ten minutes before I needed to leave the house.
While I was brushing my teeth and putting gel in my hair, my phone starting ringing. I could tell by the ringtone it was Candice. After spiting into the sink, I dashed across the hall and grabbed the phone off my bed.
“’Lo
.”
“Ty, can you pick me up? Alex is running late and Reese
already left with Josh.” She sounded out of breath.
“Yeah, I’m getting ready to leave
right now. Are you alright?”
“Huh?”
“You’re out of breath.”
“Oh, yeah
, I tried chasing Josh’s truck down the driveway, but they didn’t see me.” Candice laughed a little. “Anyway, I’ll wait at the end of the drive.”
“K, see
ya in a minute.” I touched the end button on my phone, grabbing my football bag and backpack before heading out the front door.
Candice was waiting at the end of her long driveway when I pulled up. As she climbed into the car, I noticed old, yellowish bruises on her left wrist. My gaze flicked from her wrist to her eyes, as I pressed my lips into a tight line. “Candice,
wanna talk about those?”
“Nope.”
“Listen, if those are from Alex, you need to get out—end things with him; sooner, rather than later.”
“I said I don’t
wanna talk about it.”
“I don’t give a shit what you want to talk about. Those are bruises from fingers. I can see it. How many more do you have, C? I hope that’s it and you’re doing the smart thing.”
“Ugh, fine it was one time. He grabbed my wrist, as I was walking away, after we had an argument. I threatened to leave him. He just grabbed harder than he thought. No big deal, Ty, I promise. We talked about things and we’re fixing things. He won’t do it, again.”
“I’m going to keep an eye out. If I see anything else, I will kick his ass. I promise you.”
When we pulled into the school parking lot, my eyes scanned the whole campus. It was covered in green balloons and those cheap cowboy hats. I laughed when Candice squealed. “I can’t believe they did this! Our varsity team better have done something to their school.”
We were playing the Riverdale Cowboys for
Homecoming. The two schools were cross-town rivals. We always did something to each other’s school on game day. I usually went, but this morning, I woke up late. “I don’t know what they did. But they all went.”
“I bet that’s where Alex went
, then.”
“Probably.
Come on we’re going to be late for class.”
Lunchtime came quickly, and so did the lunchtime activities. The energy in the air buzzed with the anticipation of tonight’s game. The Student Council had set up a dunk tank in the quad area. There was a long table with a couple senior girls sitting behind it. I glanced around and saw Mr. Wait climbing on to the seat in the tank. Reese was standing at the long table handing her money over and getting three balls in return.
“Does he know how good of an arm you have?”
Reese jumped before spinning around and slapping me on the chest. “Don’t do that to me.
He should; but if he doesn’t, he soon will.” She glanced over at our Civics teacher. I followed her gaze to see him staring at her with a nervous gleam in his eyes.
“Oh yeah
, he knows for sure.” I chuckled. “Want me to help you stretch your arm?”
She brought her arms behind her and I pulled them together lifting them above her head. “Where’s your
boyfriend
?”
“Who knows, he doesn’t like this stuff. Pull tighter and lift higher.
” As I lifted her arms her shirt rose revealing a smooth section of her lower back. I wanted to run my hands along it; I knew it would be silky soft. I had to stop myself. I needed to think about something else. Baseball would work.
Mets, Red Sox, Yankees…
“Thanks.” Reese pulled her arms out of my grasp. She stepped up to the line and her tongue darted out of her mouth. Whenever she concentrated, her tongue stuck out─ not a lot, but enough to notice and wonder what it would be like to feel it with my tongue.
I leaned in to her
and whispered. “You’re gonna bite that tongue off.”
She sucked it in real fast and aimed her arm for the target.
“Reese, remember you like me!” Mr. Wait yelled from atop his perch.
She counted out loud to three before pulling her arm back and firing the ball to the target.
Boom! Splash!
As soon as the ball hit the target Mr. Wait splashed into the tank.
“Oh. My. Gosh. He’s going to kill me.” Reese screamed
, covering her face.
“YES!”
“Go, Reese!” Students yelled and cheered Reese on.
Mr. Wait swam to the surface and smiled in Reese’s direction. “You got lucky. No way
could you do that, again.”
Two more balls and two more dunks later the crowd had grew bigger and the screams were louder. Reese smiled at me before grabbing a towel and walking it over to Mr. Wait. He said something to her that made her laugh before
walking away, waving bye to me. Not far from where she was, I saw Josh glaring at me. I smiled and waved at him, too.
The
y cancelled our afternoon classes for an extended rally. The sound of locker doors slamming and students shuffling through the halls and across the yard toward the gym filled the early afternoon air. I took a deep breath; my nerves were on edge after seeing Josh glaring at me. He bugged the shit out of me.
I slammed my fist in to my locker before stalking off toward my mom’s car. I had a little over eight hundred saved up
. After another year of working odd jobs, I should have enough to buy my uncle’s truck. He’d been saving it for me, but he wants fifteen hundred. I haven’t made enough mowing yards and gardening to get it, yet; so, for the time being, mom and I share her Toyota Camry. It gets me, and whoever else needs a ride, from point A to point B.
In the back seat was my game bag
. I already had my jersey on, but there was something that I needed inside for a surprise they were going to reveal at the rally. Reese.
Yes Reese got me involved, again.
She talked me into playing a couple games during the rally.
The cheerleaders had put together a Game Show theme. Each class did a game show. All four grades had a representative
s playing in each game. I walked in the gym and couldn’t believe the work they had put into this event. Each football player had his own sign with his name and number taped to the wall. With twenty-five players on each team that was fifty signs. Plus, the fourteen cheerleader’s names were also in signs on the walls. The signs weren’t small, they were each a good three to four feet long. Every inch of wall space, above the bleachers, was covered. The cheerleaders even went so far as to rotate the blue, white and gold colors of the signs. Each wall had three rows of names, leaving a section in the middle for a huge “Beat Those Cowboys” and “Mustang Win” sign. Streamers hung from the doorways and stage. The curtain on the stage was drawn and a couple signs reading Laton High Game Shows were taped on either side of the stage.
The gym filled with chatter
as the bleachers filled up. I saw the football teams I walked over and joined my team.
The lights dimmed and blue and gold spotlights started swirling around
, causing everyone to scream in anticipation. Our principal, Mr. Gustin, stepped up to the mic. “Can I have your attention, please?”
Most of the students began to settle
down, but there were still a few that yelled and talked loudly. Mr.Gustin yelled, “Hey that’s enough!”
With
in seconds, the gym was silent; well mostly, except when the lights went out, which caused a little bit of a ruckus. When the music started, everyone grew still. From where the football players sat, we could see the cheerleaders enter the gym. They had on neon skirts and shirts with knee high neon socks. When the black lights, at either end as well as in the middle of the gym floor flicked on, the cheerleaders’ outfits glowed. We were on the opposite side of the main crowd and I could see Reese’s face. It looked like she had glow-in-the-dark war paint on her face. She smiled at me before dropping her head to begin the routine. I had to admit they looked really cool. The music switched over and Party Rock Anthem started booming through the sound system. I smiled, watching them spin around and start rocking out their dance moves.
The
girls moved into what Reese had told me was called a formation. And, with the lights out, all we see is a blur of color and then the color flying through the air as three girls, one after the other flew through the air, spinning and landing back in the arms of the cheerleader acting as the base. It was pretty cool to see. Everyone stood and yelled as the cheerleaders ran out of the gym. The lights came back on and Mr. Gustin stepped up to the mic, again.
“Let’s hear it for your Lady Mustang Cheerleaders!” He gave everyone a minute to hoot and holler before patting the air to get everyone settled. “Alright now
, it’s time for the first game show. Will Monroe and Gen please come backstage?”
The curtains were pulled open and they had a Dating Game set put together on stage. Monroe, the captain and quarterback of the Varsity team, sat on one side of a partition. On the other side sat four empty chairs. Gen was the Varsity cheer captain a senior and Monroe’s girlfriend. She paced back and forth in front of Monroe and the set.
Mr.
Gustin handed Gen some cards and the mic. Her face lit up as she turned toward the bleachers and a wide smile spread across her perfect face. Gen was the stereotypical gorgeous head cheerleader. There was not a single guy at this school that didn’t dream about Gen. She was tiny, less than five feet tall, and super skinny, with long, straight, shiny straw-colored hair. Her ice blue eyes sparkled as she searched the crowd before speaking.
“Welcome to today’s episode of
Laton High’s Dating Game. Our bachelor is my lovely boyfriend”—she covered her mouth and, with her hand over the mic, you could hear her giggling.
─“Oops, my bad. Your bachelor, ladies and gentlemen, is Mr. Monroe Mackay.” She displayed her hands in typical Vanna White fashion. “Mr. Mackay likes talking about football and cars, long walks on the beach and a good hamburger, fries and chocolate milkshake.”
“Now, for our Dating Game contestants.” She made a grand gesture toward the stage door. “First, our freshman contestant, Miss Davidina, enjoys walking on the beach and long talks.”
The crowd erupted in laughter as David Pennington
, a freshman tuba player, and class president, walked in, waving at the crowd with a sly grin. Dressed in a short purple dress and sneakers, he walked to the first chair, spun around and bowed to the audience before sitting.
Three more
contestants were introduced; each was their class president, wearing similar dresses in blue, yellow and hot pink. Tyler Binson, represented our sophomore class and wore his sister’s hot pink mini dress and a pair of heels. I don’t know where they got the heels from, but it worked. The junior class contestant came out next, Carter Harrington, wore blue, thrusting his hips as he walked to his seat. Finally the senior president entered the stage. Lincoln Nieves came out in the bright yellow dress and had the crowd screaming. Gen began asking questions to both Monroe and the contestants. The game ended by Gen asking the room to cheer for their favorite, before Monroe chose the winner.
The sophomores had it by a landslide. But
since Monroe and Gen were dating and in cahoots with the seniors, he chose contestant number four, the senior. The entire gym booed the co-conspiring seniors.
The curtains closed and they flicked the lights back on. The director of the next game grabbed the microphone
. Watching Reese smile at me as she took the mic made my stomach tighten and my thumb went up to my mouth—
I hate that I bite my nails when I’m nervous.
This was it. I would be asked to make my way down to the center of the gym for
The Kissing Game. I am so not ready for this.
Reese’s soft voice attempted to ease my fears
. “Can I please get all the kissing game participants to come down?” She kept her eyes on mine, not looking for the others at all, reassuring me that it would be okay.
I lowered my hand
, drying my thumb on my pants as I stood. I had purposefully sat on the second bleacher and I was the first to reach her. There were four chairs, evenly spaced, in a row. Reese, placing four blue and gold bandanas over her arm, led me to second chair.