Falling Into You (20 page)

She nods again at me. “The alcohol made it worse?”

I shrug my shoulders. “He was never the happiest guy, but after he started drinking—really drinking—he would fly into these rages and he couldn’t get out of them.
He would come home
from the bar
and brea
k all the dishes in the kitchen. He even picked up our couch and threw it against one of the windows once.
When I was really little,
I would
hide
in my room
and make all of these elaborate plans
to
help him find a way to come back. I just wanted him to
be himself again,
and so I kept drawing him pictures and writing him little notes, but he would just tear everything up and call me a stupid bastard. And then I grew up
,
and
one day, I got angry at him instead.
I’m still angry.
”

“You have the right to be angry.”

“I don’t know how not to be.”

“He broke your trust.”

“Yeah, he did.” The worst of it spills over. “I can’t even bring myself to care about the fact that he’s dying. I’ve tried to tell myself that he’s going to be gone soon and that this might be my last chance, but I just don’t care.
I’m here for Diana. Not for him. Never for him.
”

She nods at me
. Her eyes are troubled and I get the sensation that she’s looking all the way inside me,
but she just gives me a steady
gaze
, concern written all over her face.
It’s not fair to her to be going on and on about my problems with my father when she’s just told me that hers is gone.

I sigh and lean back on my hands.
I
’m
far enough away that she can’t just reach out to me
. For the first time all day, I’m begging her silently not to touch me. One touch of her hand and I would fall into her, and that’s not what I want. Not like this.

Instead,
she offers silence
.
It’s e
xactly what I need
.

She takes another sip of wine. “Your sister must be glad you’re here.”

“She is.” I think.

“Then that’s going to have to be enough for now.”

She offers her hand
by placing it near mine.
I grab it. “Thanks.”

For me, t
he conversation’s over.
There’s nothing left for me to say
and I don’t think I will ever find the right words
.
I’m
pleading with
her silently to leave it alone
and hoping that she’ll figure it out
.

She does.
Maybe it’s because she’s thinking about her own father or she thinks that I’m
a heartless asshole. But b
y some miracle
or another
, she understands what I need without words.

“Well, then, Boudreaux,” she says a little bit too brightly. “Are we ready for the next scene?”

I’m grateful beyond words and nod my head. I had meant for this to be a seduction
. I
nstead, I’m pouring my heart out
to her about
my drunken father and she’s giving me the only responses that wouldn’t make me want to break every piece of furniture in the room.

As we start the next scene, I’m distracted and the acting is crap, but she doesn’t say anything
about it. Her accents get sillier and even more over-the-top, and I know that it’s all for my benefit.
I halfway forget about everything I just told her
and try to immerse myself back into the script
.

“Ok,” she says
eventually
, looking at the clock. “It’s 2 am. If we plan to fit the next one in before sunrise, we better get started.”

For a second, I’m momentarily confused.
Marcus
onl
y sent me three scenes to read. T
hen
,
I remember my brief flash of brilliance in the park. The fourth scene, between James and Jane, includes a kiss.
It definitely wasn’t included on the list, but I added it because I knew that if all else failed, I could basically trick her into kissing me.
Not
my finest moment, but you have to use what you’ve got.

“Ok.” I grab our wine glasses and refill
them with the last of the bottle. This was going to require liquid courage. “So, we
have James and Jane. T
hey’re stuck in a warehouse and they’re surrounded by bad guys. Jane is afraid she’ll never get out of there, and James is just trying to get an escape plan.”

She nods, and looks at me expectantly, for some further insight into the characters or the scene.

“That’s pretty much it.”

“It’s not exactly the best screenplay ever written
.” She’s
trying to hide a smile.

She is
most definitely right. It is not the best screenplay ever written.
“Nope. But it’s the only one we have right now. Unless you want to start performing the scene with the candy monster and the wrappers.”

“Save me!” she exclaims. “No,
it’s okay. I think
we
’ll be
stick
ing
with James and Jane.
If only to save you from having to add ‘terrible writer’ to my list.
Do we know anything else about Jane?”

“We know absolutely nothing about Jane except for the fact that she has terrible taste in men.”

“All right, then. At least you’ll be spared another attempt at an accent. Unless she’s Russian or something?” she adds a bit hopefully.

“You’re out of luck. Amer
ican.” She puts an exaggerated frown on her face and laughs. I hand her the script, and she’s absorbed in it
, mouthing the words as she reads over the page.

I’ve memorized the layout of the lines, the stage directions, and t
he kiss is on the next pag
e.
I’m hoping she doesn’t see
it and
right through me. She raises her e
yebrows a couple of times
, but
she doesn’t turn the page.
I breathe a sigh of relief.

“Ready,” she says. “I’m Jane. You’re James. Got it.”

I’ve been waiting for what feels like hours. I jump into
James Ross’s skin
.
“Listen.
We are going to get out of here.”
She’s on her feet and I move closer to her, touching her arm. She
glances
down at it and back up at me.

“But we’re surrounded. How will we
ever escape?” She bites her lip
and she’s shaking,
trying
keep from laughing at the trite dialogue.

I’m barreling through the scene.
“I’ve got a plan. Now, I’m not saying it’s much of a plan, but it’s something. And something’s all we got right now.”

“James, I’m scared.”

“Listen, Jane. It’s all going to be all right.”

She flips the page and I know that she sees it
—the kiss
.
I know she thinks that the scene is over, t
hat we’re going to skip it
.
My
genius
plan was supposed to tell me whether
or not
she wanted me to kiss her, whether the flames between us were real or entirely imaginary.

I’m still not sure,
and I realize that the plan wasn’t going to work anyways
. I want her to know without a doubt
that it’s
Hallie
I am kissing and not Jane.

“
Hallie
.
” I murmur her name and move closer to her, running a hand through her hair. It s
pills like silk over my fingers, and h
er eyes are br
ight and endless
.

I pull her to me and
touch my lips to her cheek, waiting for her to push me away
.
I almost jerk
back
when I feel the heat radiating between us,
but her body is falling into mine and I grab her chin and touch my lips to hers
.

S
he tastes l
ike honey and mint and sunshine.

U
nable to sto
p myself, I take more and more when s
omething changes in the ai
r
. S
he’s running her fingers up and down my arm and I part her lips further, pushing the tip of my tongue inside.
I want to stay entwined with her forever in this moment. She lets out a little moan, and I kiss her harder, needing more and knowing that there will never be enough of this, enough
of her to satisfy me.

And without warning, h
er
hand
s are on my chest and she pushes
me away sl
ightly. O
ur bodies are s
till tangled up in each other,
but
t
here’s a question
in her eyes
. I try to find words to answer it,
but nothing seems good enough. My
mouth closes on hers again and that’s enough for now.

For now.

Chapter 13

HALLIE

Two thoughts grip me as soon as I’m able to reconcile the fact that my entire body i
s not, actually, made of jelly. F
irst, I’m still not sure if he was kissing me or if he was kissing Jane. Second, I don’t care.

He’s looking at me with a mixture of doubt and awe and
suddenly
I’m pretty sure
that kiss was meant for me
.

“Did you mean to kiss me?” I blurt out desperately.

He doesn’t respond, but
he does pull my face to his again. W
e’re wrapped all up in each other and it’s the best
answer I could have hoped for.
We fall onto the couch, a mixture of arms and legs and
other
body parts and he’s
demanding more
now, kissing my face and hands and running his fingers down my arms.

“Sorry.
”
He’s
running his fingers through his loose curls
nervously
. “I didn’t mean to attack you like that, it’s just…”

O
ur eyes meet
.
I can practically see the whirring of his thoughts, but then he makes a decision.
“It’s just that I’ve been needing to do that all day.”

Oh.

I hadn’t realized I had said i
t
aloud
, that and nothing else. H
e’s reaching for his coat when I stop him with a touch of my hand.

“It wasn’t a bad oh. It was just an oh.”

“Oh.”

I almost never have a problem with finding words (usually, it’s more of the opposite
problem
), but I can’t seem to make a sound.

“I think you’re the most extr
aordinary person I’ve ever met
.
”

The most beautiful boy in the world, the soon-to-be movie star, is telling me that I’m the most extraordinary person he’s ever met? For another second, I wonder whether this is all some practical joke or if I’m just making it all up in my h
ead
or if he’s actually standing in front of me
.

I start to say something about how
ridiculous
his statement is, because I’ve never been good with compliments and I’m nervous and trying not to make a total fool of myself. Instead, I
give up and take what he’s given me and hold it inside my head
.
“That’s definitely the nicest th
ing anyone’s ever said to me
.
”

“I think someone should tell you that every day.”

Unable to stop myself, I lean ove
r and kiss his cheek. I stutter
.
My brief ability to speak has utterly vanished.
“I don’t know…
how
…this…
Thank you.”

And I’m kissing him this time, because
words are silly and the feeling of his lips on mine earlier
wasn’t enough, not even close to enough. I move slowly
into him, brushing my lips against his.
I can feel the muscles in his face move
next to mine, and I can tell that h
e’s smiling
.

His arms encircle my waist and
his kiss
is
urgen
t again and he’s pulling at the bottom of my shirt and I’m yanking at his clothes and
every
one of my
nerve ending
s
is on fire
. T
here’s no way that I’m able to resist him
, and if that makes me a whore and his pretty words we
re only meant to get me into his
bed tonight, well,
screw
it all
.
He can have me.