FascinatingRhythm (15 page)

Watching her sleep, he murmured her name, and then the
simple truth. “I love you.”

To his total shock, her eyes flicked open and he met her
gaze, unwarned and unprotected. He never did that, never showed anyone just
what he was feeling, always using his built-in self-censor. Not this time.

He didn’t look away. Too late to do that.

She smiled and reached out so he automatically took her
hand, twining their fingers together. “I love you too,” she said.

Completely lost for words, he stared at her, his insides
stilling and holding the moment. No turbulence as he’d imagined he’d feel if he
ever told anyone what he’d just told her. Nothing but relief and delight.

“Truly?”

“Always.” She sounded so low he had to lean forward to hear
her. Giving up on the chair, he sat on the edge of the bed, holding her hand.
“I never stopped. Why do you think I welcomed you back after you treated me so
badly?”

“I thought you were just a kind, thoughtful person.” He
laughed, then stopped, the sound still echoing around the room in the sudden
silence. “Are you reading my lips? Did you hear what I said before you opened
your eyes?”

She nodded. “I heard.”

“Fuck.” The moment he said it, he wished he hadn’t. It
seemed wrong somehow, that one of the first words she heard him say was a curse
word. But it slipped out and now he couldn’t unsay it. “When?”

“Slowly over the last two days. They gave me different
headphones yesterday. The ones I wore at first…” She paused and smiled, her
soft, hesitant voice quiet even in the hush of this room. “Sorry. They blocked
all sound. Yesterday they gave me a pair that I have to use if I tire or if the
sound is too loud. They look like ordinary headphones but they are not.”

He loved her breathy tones, her hesitation, but he guessed
that wasn’t from choice because it didn’t sound as fluid, as confident, as her
voice when she’d been deaf. “Is it hard for you to speak?”

“After nearly twenty years? Yes it is. I can hear my voice
in my head, and sometimes it takes me by surprise.” She tugged him and he moved
closer. “Will you hold me, Hunter?”

Holding her sounded like paradise to him, but he hesitated.
“What if someone comes in?”

“What time is it?”

“After eight.”

She pulled his hand harder. “Then they won’t. They want me
to rest but I’ve been thinking about you. Missing you. I made my mother promise
not to come back until the morning. Nobody will come. Hold me, Hunter, please.
I’ve missed you.”

When she threw back the sheet, he saw she was wearing
something blue and silky. “Pretty,” he murmured appreciatively.

“Me or the nightgown?”

He laughed, remembering to keep it low. “Both. Do you prefer
me to whisper?”

“No.” She tugged again and he gave in. How could he resist?
After kicking off his shoes he joined her in the bed, a tight fit even though
it seemed bigger than the average hospital bed. But he was a big man.

When she came to him, she laid her head on his shoulder and
snuggled close, curling a leg around his. It seemed natural to push his leg
between hers and let her pussy rest against his thigh. Almost domestic,
considering he was fully dressed and she wore a nightgown.

But not quite. The arousal thrumming through his veins
negated that thought. “Don’t raise your voice though,” she said. “They’ll hear
and come in. How did you persuade them to let you in?”

“Being well-known has its advantages,” he admitted. “I
didn’t have to show them any ID.” Unable to stop himself, he pressed his lips
to her forehead and experienced the heady rush of being with her again. Almost
worth spending time apart for that but not quite.

She lifted her chin. “How about a proper kiss?”

“Flirtatious?” Surely not, but he wouldn’t deny either of
them the pleasure.

He should have known better. Once his lips came into contact
with hers, he was completely lost. Holding her tightly against him, running his
hands over the smooth curves of her silk-covered back, he plundered.

He forced himself to go as gently as he could manage but she
responded eagerly, thrusting her tongue into his mouth, running it over the
tender flesh before caressing his tongue with hers, as soft as a breeze, as
devastating as a summer storm.

Groaning into her mouth, he tightened his hold, pressing her
lower body against his erection, rubbing in a rhythm as instinctive as
breathing. She rode his leg, moving against him as if she wanted him, her
fingers digging into his muscles.

He rolled on to his back, taking her with him and she
squirmed, opening her legs to encompass his body. Just as well her nightgown
had a full skirt. He discovered his mistake when he stroked over her back, over
the delectable shape of her buttocks and down to her thighs. Not a full skirt.
A slit right up one side of the wonderful garment.

Kiss followed kiss, each more passionate than the last. He
was lost, couldn’t get enough of her. As always.

Clenching his hand in her hair, he used it to ease her away.
“Hey. We shouldn’t be doing this. A kiss is fine, but—” He glanced at the door.

She gurgled with laughter, a new sound for her and one he’d
never cease loving. “Coward.”

“Hey, who are you calling coward?” To punish her, he brought
her close for another kiss, but then reluctantly rolled back to deposit her on
the sheets, intending to ease away.

She grabbed him, pulled him back. He might as well weigh
nothing for all the strength he had to leave her alone. “Stay. I want to
celebrate. I’ve been waiting for days to celebrate properly.” He loved the way
she pronounced each syllable of the word separately, with a minute hesitation
between each. “Make love with me, Hunter.”

He loved that she said “with” instead of “to”. He loved her
new laugh, loved the desire in her eyes. Just plain loved her. “You want love
or fucking?”

“What’s on offer?”

“You heard me earlier. I can do both.”

She walked her fingers up his chest until he caught her hand
and brought it to his lips, not caring if anyone came in anymore. Whatever
Sabina wanted, she should have, and if she wanted him, he’d give it to her.
“Let’s see what happens, shall we?”

Only one more consideration remained. “Are you well enough?
I mean truly? Will you promise to tell me if it gets too much for you?”

She nodded, smiling. “I like hearing, at least so far it’s
turned out well. I want to keep it. So yes, I’ll tell you. I promise.”

He dipped down for a kiss, but halfway through groaned and
pulled away, flopping down next to her, hand over his eyes. “No condom.” They’d
have to cope without.

Mischief lit her eyes. “I have. I went to the bathroom
outside the ward today when they wanted me to walk for a while. There’s a
condom machine in the toilet outside. I had some change in the pocket of my
robe. Enough to buy one.”

“They don’t make them in threes?”

She laughed and touched a finger to his nose. “What era are
you living in, Hunter Ostrander?”

“Yours. Whichever one you want.” So relieved and happy to
see her, he’d do whatever she wanted. Yeah, he was her bitch right now.

“Then put on the condom. It’s in the bedside table drawer.”

“Happy to oblige.” More than happy. He found the condom and
got out of bed to strip. He kicked the clothes under the bed.

She stripped her nightgown off over her head and tucked it
under the pillow, reaching for him just as he came back down to her. As if it
was meant to be, his cock slipped between her thighs, bathing in her juices and
he groaned. “No, not yet.”

“Yes yet.” Putting her arms around him, she held him tight
around his waist, not allowing him to move away. “Can’t you feel how much I
want you? Please, Hunter.”

“Don’t say that.”

“What?” A smile curved her lips, teasing and happy.

“I’m ready to burst.” He stole another kiss, groaning into
her mouth. “What you do to me,
älskling
.I should be taking care
of you. You’ve had an operation.”

“I know that. But that was four days ago, nearly five.
They’re only keeping me here for observation and study. If I’d had a routine
procedure I’d be home by now.”

He rubbed his cock against her, watching as she arched her
back and strained up to him. With a shaky laugh, he gave in and slid down to
penetrate her. “Now
this
is coming home.” He kissed her again, sweetly,
tasting her lips, feeling the sharp edges of her teeth graze his tongue as he
plunged deeply. She could make him come just like that.

Taking care to rest his upper body on his elbows, he drove
into her and then withdrew, only to thrust again. But despite her assurances,
he kept his lovemaking steady and slow, trying to find her G-spot every time,
making it count.

“So is this making love or fucking?” she murmured. He loved
that she could do that. Sometimes she’d pitch her speech too loud but she
didn’t now. She spoke too quietly, if anything, taking care not to shout.
Hearing what she said in her head must be strange, but he found it hard to
imagine because that was the way he’d always experienced speech. He watched her
as he worked, reveling in the sensation of her body clasping his so intimately
and surely.

“It’s both,” he said. “I love you, Sabina.”

“Yes.” She closed her eyes and smiled dreamily. “I love you
too.” Her breath caught and her mouth opened just a little, inviting, but he
watched her, studied her face in the dim light. He kept his drives steady,
heartbeat level, watching her all the while, gauging her responses.

Every time she gave one of the little whimpers at the back
of her throat his arousal went higher. Awareness of his body increased, tingles
spreading through all his limbs, the urge to drive hard and fast almost
overwhelming him. His balls tightened, increased in sensitivity, growing more
and harder every time they slapped against her body. He gritted his teeth
against the desire, the need to come, determined she would have her pleasure
first.

Only that will, that insistence kept him from exploding
inside her. She watched him, never closed her eyes. He bent to kiss her again,
taking her lips gently this time, his mouth trembling against hers as he forced
restraint on himself. Not helped when she slid her hand from his elbow where
he’d propped it next to her, up his arm to his shoulder, the caress a special
one for them both, tender and loving.

He drew away, watched as she tightened her lips, her breath
coming in short pants, opening her eyes as they threatened to close. She was
close. So wet, so easy to glide into her and force her higher, harder.

Yes! At last, he felt the first quiver of her pussy against
his cock as the first physical signs of her climax shivered through her body.
Small and delicate she was, but when she finally bucked and cried his name, he
almost forgot where they were. He had to slam his mouth down on hers to drink
her cries as her body clenched around his cock, forcing him into an orgasm he
had no chance of preventing.

She milked him, took all he had, and he poured his love into
her accepting body. But for the condom, they’d have slid together, soaked her
thighs and the bush of pubic hair around the base of his cock.

Fuck, but he’d missed her. So badly, so much. Worried about
her, unable to settle. Tiananmen and Red Squares were nothing compared to this,
the rush of adrenaline fighting for supremacy.
Take her, hold her, keep her.
He would. Now and forever.

When Sabina awoke Hunter was lying next to her, holding her
in the shelter of his body. He’d disposed of the condom, presumably in the tiny
bathroom of her hospital suite, and put on his underwear and T-shirt, but his
bare legs tangled with hers. His T-shirt was a thin one so she felt his body,
hot and hard. His heart beat steadily against his chest. When she stirred, he
murmured something. Her name. It sounded so good.

Lifting her head, she gazed at him. He wasn’t asleep as
she’d first thought. “What time is it?”

“Nearly midnight. The nurse came in but I told her we were
fine.”

“Were you—”

He shushed her with a gentle kiss. “I’d already put some
clothes back on and I pulled the covers up around your shoulders. You should
put your nightgown on though.”

“Why? I’m warm enough.”

He drifted his hand over her breast and paused to tweak her
nipple. “Because of this. Because you’re irresistible and we only had one
condom. You’re irresistible, so have mercy on a poor feeble male and let me
help you cover up.”

It didn’t matter. Her nightgown was fine silk, only masked
by lace on the bodice and around the hem and slit. She recalled what he’d done
when she found it had a slit and giggled.

“What is it?”

“Is that why you dressed?”

“I didn’t want to embarrass you.” He frowned. “And I thought
if they found us naked in bed together, they might throw me out.” He sat up,
easing his arm out from under her before he reached under her pillow.

Tenderly, he helped her into her nightdress, so carefully
she laughed. “I won’t break.”

She emerged from the folds to find him staring at her in
what looked suspiciously like awe. “I can’t believe it. It is a miracle, isn’t
it?”

He put his arm around her shoulders but she remained
sitting, leaning into him. “No, it’s science. And it might not work completely.
I can’t take anything for granted.”

“What level of hearing do you have?”

“Close to normal,” she admitted. “I still can’t hear high
and low ends of sound very well and I might never do so, but I can hear. I can
function, as they say. It’s strange. I woke up this moaning convinced I was
nine years old, because that was the last time I could hear this well.” She
leaned against him, remembering how weird that had felt. Not as if she was
waking from a dream of being nine but rather waking from a dream of being an
adult, going right back to the time before she’d contracted the infection that
had taken her hearing. “Just as well I’m not though, eh?” Her effort to turn
the experience into a mild joke didn’t work too well.

Hunter frowned. “I shouldn’t have made love to you.”

“Yes you should. I wanted you to. Would you rather I chased
you around the room until I caught you?”

That did the trick. He lost the frown, although his smile
appeared a little false. “You can’t do that.”

“Yes I can. My balance is excellent. They had me walk along
a line, just as if I’d been drinking. That was yesterday. They let me get up
the day after the operation but I was still dizzy then, so I didn’t do more
than sit in that chair and watch the TV. They wanted me upright to help with
the drainage, they said.” She grimaced. “I didn’t ask, but they changed my dressings
a few times.”

“Did you hear anything when they did?”

She bit her lip and nodded. “A little. But they said it
could be a residual memory. They didn’t want to get my hopes up I guess.” She
ran the flat of her hand across his considerable chest. “When they tried to
treat me like porcelain, I told them to fuck off.”

He did chuckle then, the low rumbling a sound she’d always
treasure. “That’s my girl. When will they release you?”

“Tomorrow, probably. But I have to come back for tests every
day.” She paused, not knowing what he’d think of her next information, but she
had to tell him. “My mother has to go home on Sunday. She got all the time off
work they’d allow her and she can’t afford to lose it. Since the economy
collapsed, there aren’t many jobs around.”

“That’s okay.” He sounded remarkably calm. She thought he’d
go nuts if he knew she’d be alone after the weekend. He had to get back for
another concert, but Berlin was even closer than Moscow, and a lot easier to
get in and out of.

“I can’t fly, Hunter. If I come to see you, it will be ferry
and train.”

“I’ll come to you.” He turned his head, met her gaze. She
saw speculation in the blue depths and a determination she didn’t trust. He was
planning something.

“Emmelie has offered me a room in her house. It seems a good
idea. While I can’t fly, I’ll be able to drive after this weekend they said. Or
I can get the train.”

He frowned at her. “Do you want to stay with her?”

She hesitated before she replied. “At first I thought not,
but I have some ideas and I want to talk to Emmelie.”

“After what she did to you, I’m surprised you want to see
her again.”

“Why? I don’t hold grudges. Life is too short for that.
Besides—” She kissed his chest. “Look what a fine son she made. How can I be
mad at a woman who produced you?”

Sadness, she saw it now, ringing his eyes together with the
dark shadows of weariness. “She has her faults, but she means well. I spoke to
her about what she did. She texted me to say she was sorry but she had good
reasons. I want to talk to her about that, find out what she meant.”

“I’ll drive you,” he said, “but I have to be in Berlin for
the weekend. After that we have a few days before Paris.” He paused. “I’d like
you to come with me to Paris.”

“How is that possible?”

“Train,” he said. “I can fly here and travel with you. Or
hire a car if you’d prefer.”

She shook her head but stopped, because despite what she’d
said about being well, she still had residual dizziness. Everything was fine as
long as she kept her head steady. The doctor said it would pass in a few days
and to tell him if it hadn’t gone by Monday. She wouldn’t tell Hunter though.
Already she knew her big man worried about her and in a perverse way, she
reveled in it, because it showed how much he cared. “It’s a long journey. In
any case, I have to be here for therapy and examinations.”

“Not necessarily.”

Something stopped then and she paused, watched him. His
muscles tightened slightly and his eyes gained an expression of wariness.

“What have you done?” Sitting up in bed, she turned the dimmer
switch by her bed down so the light glowed brighter. She didn’t want to miss
anything of this, and if she could aid her burgeoning hearing skills by
lip-reading then she was all for it.

Glad she’d put on her nightdress, despite its thinness, she
felt safer, as if it were some kind of armor. Why she needed it she wasn’t sure
yet. “What’s happened?”

His expression warmed and softened. “I’ve found a way for us
to be together, at least until the end of the European tour.”

He had said that, hadn’t he? “It’s impossible,” she said. “I
have to stay here for tests and aftercare. They want me close for the next six
weeks and then I have to let them test me in some detail. It’s part of the
agreement and I won’t renege on it.”

Now he just looked smug, and she didn’t like that any better
than the wary expression of a few moments earlier. As if he could solve
everything with a wave of his wand—or drumstick. “I know that. I called every
day and asked for your progress and I spoke to your caregivers. One of them is
available.”

“For what? A threesome?” She snapped the words,
unnecessarily tense, but she didn’t care.

“She’s willing to travel with us and do all the tests she
can offsite. She’s a qualified therapist so she can do that part too.”

“And who will pay for all that?”

He shrugged. “I will.”

She didn’t hesitate. “No.”

He blinked, his eyes widening. “What?”

“No. Thank you, but no.” At least she’d managed the thanks,
although she said it through gritted teeth. Could he get any more infuriating?
Couldn’t he see?

“It means you can travel with me.”

He really couldn’t see. “And do what?”

“Whatever you want.”

She’d already decided that part and she was making plans.
Taking off around the world with him wasn’t one of them. “I want to make a
difference to the deaf community.”

“But you’re…” He trailed off. He must have seen the look on
her face. Maybe she’d colored up, her fury had to be showing somewhere. It had,
because he got out of bed and bent to retrieve his jeans. A pang of sorrow went
through her. Why couldn’t she have waited until tomorrow?

Because he’d been bursting to tell her. “I’m a bridge.” To
emphasize her point, she signed as she spoke. “I can lip-read and I can sign in
several languages. I plan to add more. I can talk to the people who have
suddenly become hearing after years of deafness, and to people who have lost
their hearing after a life of sound. I want to help.”

“And that’s more important than us? Than our happiness?” He
growled the words, facing her. “Why can’t you do that with me?”

“I want to do it here, in Scandinavia, the area of the world
I know best.” She’d thought her plan through carefully, made notes, worked on
it when she had a chance. The plan had kept her sane when she wondered if she’d
regain her hearing or be stone deaf. It made sense whatever happened, and she
could concentrate on something else.

“I want to take care of you.”

If anything, her anger rose even more. “I don’t want anyone
to take care of me. Haven’t you learned anything? Why does being deaf mean I
need someone to look after me? Why don’t you accept me as I am? I have always
hated that, to have people to fuss around me.”

With a dedicated therapist and Hunter, she wouldn’t have
time to do her own thing. She’d have to report in and allow someone to go with
her, even if she wanted to go on a simple shopping trip. “I won’t do it,
Hunter. I wouldn’t survive. Not as a person and not as someone who wants to do
something useful in society.”

She stumbled over her words and stopped talking, continuing
her argument with her hands. “I can’t be so dependent on someone else. I can’t.
I want to do this. The hospital will make an announcement about the procedure
and the TV company wants to interview me. I can make this part of my
interview.”

He paused in the act of zipping up his pants and stared at
her, his expression unreadable now, the Hunter Ostrander the press knew. He
spoke. “You could do that with me.”

“But you’d be paying. I’d be
dependent
on you. Don’t
you know me better than that? How can I possibly let you do it?”

He came over to the bed, dropped his palms onto the surface
and leaned in, invading her space so she could feel his heat, his breath on her
face. “Because I love you. Don’t you trust me? Money is nothing, Sabina,
nothing at all.”

“Only when you’ve had it all your life. You’ve gone from
rich to richer. My mother works as a PA. She’s worked all her life to get up to
that point and she needs the money. My father teaches at a local school. He
qualified late. I have six brothers and sisters. Six, Hunter. We never had
money to spare, we were always looking for it, making it. When the economic
downturn came, we had more problems. Four of my siblings don’t have jobs
anymore. I will never depend on anyone else for my income.”

“Fuck.” He pulled away. “Money is more important to you than
happiness? Then wallow in your misery. Struggle and fight and hate it. Keep
your nose down. If you let me or my family help, you’d reach more people
faster.”

She’d been working for years to reach this point, built up
her savings. This operation and its aftermath would take a considerable chunk.
At least she had somewhere to stay. It meant she could live near enough to the
hospital to travel there for her tests. She also had no doubt that Emmelie had
ulterior motives. She’d parade Sabina as an example of a woman made miserable
by the restoration of her hearing.

Sabina wanted to combat that and beat her at her own game.
Use Emmelie in her turn. Emmelie had access to the right people, the ones in
the hearing community and the deaf who understood and could choose to back her.

If she took off with Emmelie’s son, none of that would work.

Hunter glanced back at her. “It hurts, Sabina, that you
think more of your career than you do of me. I will keep in touch, because I
promised I would. Have a good life.”

He turned and left, closing the door carefully behind him.
She’d never noticed he did that before. Never heard the hushed click, never
understood why.

She wasn’t sure she understood now, but she was too busy
trying to stem her tears to think about it clearly.

How could things have gone wrong so quickly? One minute she
was telling him she loved him and the next he’d gone. Issues? His anger,
certainly. She’d seen him lose it with his mother so she should have paid more
attention to that, realized that one day he’d turn it on her.

When he left, he’d been furious. His upright stance, the
fire in his eyes, the way his mouth had tightened and the lines at the corners
deepened with a rigidity that had nothing to do with humor.

Maybe she was better off without him.